Out Of Control
by linalove
Summary: "Good and bad. Light and darkness. Angel and demon. Predator and prey. Love and revenge. I cannot tell the difference anymore. Blurred lines is all I have. The only constant is him. And he won't ever let me go. Not even in freedom; our freedom." Barnabas/OC. AU. Rating changed.
1. Prologue

**A/N: Welcome to a new story! Some of you might have read part of this on my Livejournal but those who haven't, welcome!**

**Okay, I need to point out some things about this:**

**First of all, this is going to be Alternate Universe. It is of course inspired by the Tim Burton movie but it disregards the second half. So, that means no Canon. Secondly, this is a Barnabas Collins/OC story but not your regular one. You shall see why as we go on.**

**And thirdly, Angelique here is portrayed as the odd insane lady that she is. She is after one thing: to hurt Barnabas and in her own sadistic way make him love her. **

**So, if all this does not bother you please proceed. If the above do bother you then proceed no further.**

**Like I said, this is AU.**

**Also, the rating will change after a few chapters to M.**

**Okay, here we go!**

**_Dedicated to Jandra1969_. She knows why. Thank you, love!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Out of Control**

**Prologue**

_**Stockholm syndrome:** a psychological phenomenon in which hostages express empathy, sympathy and have positive feelings towards their captors, sometimes to the point of defending them. These feelings are generally considered irrational in light of the danger or risk endured by the victims, who essentially mistake a lack of abuse from their captors for an act of kindness…_

* * *

I never thought myself to be stupid. No. One could say a lot of things about me but foolishness was never in my list of faults. No.

I am rather bright…or I used to be. Maybe I am indeed stupid. They certainly make it seem so when they speak about me, _for_ me, so close to me. Two feet away can hardly be called a long distance but there they are, whispering about me as if I can't hear them. They are mistaken because I can.

I am not looking at them though. No, I am not and I will not because if I do look up I am going to see the expression on that woman's face and it's going to be like a blow to the stomach. Her pitiful gaze is worse than the scars on my wrists. Her sad gaze is always there since they brought me here; since _he_ brought me here.

He is different though…Much different. There is no anger in his gaze now. No hunger. He no longer lusts for my blood and that should make me happy. I am happy. I really am…Or am I not?

I slowly shake my head. I am happy because now I am getting stronger, healthier. I have gained weight. He feeds me too much. It's like he's making up for something he had no control over. It is funny how I can understand him better than he can understand himself.

I can no longer remember how many times he has apologized; over and over until I had to scream at him to stop. He didn't like it when I did that. He looked as if I had wounded him deeply and I didn't want that. I know that he was as much a victim as I had been. That knowledge doesn't make him feel better…In some degree it doesn't make _me_ feel better but I had been there when he had fought over his natural instincts. He is a predator and I…I was and still _am_ his natural prey. It does not matter that he no longer hurts me to get what he wants. I can still see it in his eyes when he looks at me while he thinks I am not going to notice. The passionate glimmer in his eyes that used to speak of his bloodlust is still there but it is not the same now.

I made the silly mistake of asking him about it once. He had just stared at me before he had released a warm, light chuckle. He had denied that the look in his eyes was hunger for my blood. He had spoken to me with riddles and no matter how much I pride myself in being smart on the uptake I still hadn't managed to understand him.

But _oh no_. Their voices are getting louder and I have to look up this time.

"Barnabas, no! She has to leave this place. You have to let her go! Look at her!" the woman's voice is low but I can hear it from my bed and he…he looks really upset. I can see his fists curled by his sides.

"I am sorry, Julia. But I have not done all this just to let her go."

"You cannot help her. Have you any idea what Stockholm syndrome means? She needs help."

"That's why you are here. And you will help me." He speaks quietly and I blink, momentarily forgetting how heavy my eyelids feel.

"My problem is not helping you, you know that. But I can see that you are just as attached. This is dangerous." Julia whispers as she places a hand on his arm.

I feel my hands twitch at the intimate gesture and I don't know why that particular fact grasps my attention.

"I broke her, I am going to fix her." His tone is dripping with finality and I want to smile because despite how _sick_ it sounds I don't want him to let me go. No one is waiting for my return anyway. No one searched for me. Eight months is not a small amount of time…

My landlady probably thinks I am dead by now. I didn't even like her much. She is a cat person. I love dogs. She is angry at everyone; I am silly enough to think there is good in all people. The only thing that we're similar in is our loneliness. But I am no longer alone, am I?

"You didn't break her. Angelique did. Please, the only way to help her is to let her go. Give her normalcy." Julia's voice breaks through my haze and I fix my eyes upon them again.

"I am trying to."

"No, you're not-…"

"Do you remember how she was when I returned with her? Do you remember? I do. Now look at her. Don't ever tell me again that I am not helping her." His voice gains volume again and I tense up.

"Barnabas-…"

"No! Just because she doesn't talk to you it does not mean that she is deaf. The discussion is over, Doctor. I expect updates on her health in the next few days, is that understood?"

The redhead sighs and her eyes turn to settle on me. I shift nervously under her scrutiny and my eyes go reflexively to her vibrant hair. She is beautiful and I push my hands between my knees as I curl into a tighter ball upon the covers. She smiles at me with sincerity and I blink before I lift my hand in a small wave.

She looks away from me and I lower my hand, letting it fall idly on the mattress again.

"Fine. You always get what you want anyway." She tells him before she turns to exit the bedroom.

She closes the door behind her and he takes a deep breath even though I know he does not need it to survive. Slowly, he turns to face me and I can see the immediate change in his eyes. They soften and the irises seem to take the color of molten honey. I don't think it's pity that causes his eyes to glimmer like that. No, I don't think that he pities me. Maybe he did so at first when he realized that he had been using me to quench his thirst while we were both buried in that crypt…But not anymore. He looks at me…differently now. I wonder what he sees because I am nothing remarkable. I am too thin, my hair is only just regaining its brightness and silkiness and my eyes…my eyes are dull. I don't think there can be any improvement for them though. They have always been a dull dark brown…almost black.

He slowly approaches the bed and I inhale sharply as he does so. He comes to sit next to me on the mattress and hesitantly reaches out for my hand that is still clasped between my knees. I allow him to take my hand and as he does so I shiver. His skin is so cold that it should be uncomfortable but it is not. He slips his long fingers through mine and takes a deep breath before he smiles. I don't smile back but I watch him curiously, with interest.

"What's it going to be, Jane?" he murmurs as he rubs his thumb over my skin, "Are you going to talk to me today?"

I inhale sharply and slowly sit up, tugging my shirt down my stomach as I do so. I flick my dark hair behind my shoulder and his eyes go immediately to the fading bite marks on my neck. His face clouds over with shame and I tighten my fingers around his hand. His eyes snap back to my face at my unlikely gesture.

"I think I am hungry." The words tumble from my mouth without my consent but all my worries disappear when he smiles. I return it with the slightest bit of hesitancy and I swallow hard as he nods his head at me. He gives my hand a squeeze and I know that if he wanted to he could break my hand with a single movement, with the slightest pressure. But he doesn't. He won't ever do that because my reluctant captor has now turned my fierce protector.

I am Jane Walden and this is my story.

**End of the prologue.**

**Author's note: Still here? Really? Great! Thank you so much for reading. If I made you curious and you want more then drop me a few words. They will make my day and feed the muse.**

**The next chapter is ready and waiting by the way.**

**Join me on Facebook for news, covers and much more! Link's on my profile.**

**Until next time!**

**Xxx Lina :o)**


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N: Welcome to the first actual chapter.**

**A huge thank you to those who reviewed the prologue: 88dragon06, Makrciana, SweetMusicDreamer, TinkerbellxO, dionne dance, XantheXV, Jay D. Moore, AngeliqueBouchard1972, carmeleissle5cullen, skycord1990, nuckythompson, xxPaige23xx, ForeverACharmedOne, Jandra1969, BlooperLover, ElleWillBite, Balder Rask, CharlieCats and sparrowismyhummingbird. You all rock for reading and commenting on this!**

**Now on with the first official chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows. I only own my OC and this plot.**

* * *

**Chapter 1**

**_Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player  
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage  
And then is heard no more: it is a tale  
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,  
Signifying nothing.  
~__William Shakespeare__, _Macbeth, 5. 5.**

_1972, Collinsport, Maine _

A small paw pokes me sharply in the chest and I stir. A groan escapes from my lips as I turn onto my side, facing away from the small intruder who is trying to remind me that a new day has arrived. I burry my head under my fluffy pillow but the small devil is not giving up. I can feel him pawing at my shoulder and I sigh with dread before I push the pillow away from my face.

"How on earth do you manage to get inside _every_ morning?" I mumble as I turn onto my back and look at the white fur ball that is in the process of stretching on my bed as if he owns it.

"And how is it that you manage to wake up before me?" I mutter as I sit up and rub my sleep deprived eyes. I pull my hands away from my face and look at Tommy. Before you say anything, no. I do not own a cat. My landlady, Mrs. Newton does.

"Oh, right. Now I remember. You can _actually_ sleep." I glance at the cat with envy before I push the covers away from my body and stand up.

The cat hops down from the bed and looks up at me with hope. I groan and lean down to pick him up before I storm barefoot to my door. I unlock it and open it before I climb the small flight of stairs.

I knock on the door and wait while Tommy looks at with what I sense is derision. I snicker and nod at him.

"Well, she is your mistress." I mumble down at him before I knock on the door again.

"Who is it?" Mrs. Newton's grumpy voice causes me to roll my eyes but I answer nonetheless.

"It's Jane."

The door is unlocked a moment later and she looks at me with a scowl on her withered face.

"What?" she almost spats and her hair looks like a bird's nest.

"Um, your cat invaded my home again." I say as I hand her the cat and step back.

Her eyes lit up at the sight of her pet but when she looks back at me they narrow, "I am still waiting for the rent, Jane." She points a bony finger at me and I have the urge to roll my eyes but I don't.

"I know, Mrs. Newton. I am getting paid in a week…The business is a little low-…"

"That's not what I heard." She cuts me off and I shut my mouth because I know there is no use trying to speak when she has that determined look upon her face.

"Oh?"

"I heard that the Collins' business is up and running properly again." She hisses out at me, "And you're supposed to know your economics." She eyes me with irk.

I swallow down my sharp reply and smile, "Sadly, as you may recall, I am not working as an accountant there, Mrs. Newton." I say through gritted teeth but like always she does not notice my irritation.

"Whatever, I want the rent on the 10th. Do not be late."

With those words she shuts the door on my face and I can hear her footsteps echoing down her hall.

I groan and push my straight hair behind my ear before I turn on my heel and walk back upstairs.

"Why do I bother?" I mumble to myself as I enter my house and close the door, "Your own cat does not like you." I make my way to the kitchen to make some coffee and while I wait I take a deep breath and rub my temples. I glance at the box of pills on the counter and groan as I take them. I pour a glass of water and I take two of them, hoping and praying that they will work until I arrive at work.

Insomnia is not a good thing when you have to wake early in the morning. It also is not great when you get really strong headaches because of it. It's not a constant thing, mind you. There are times when I can sleep well and fully but there are some times when I cannot.

Acute insomnia the doctor called it. It relates with high anxiety levels and stress.

I scoff. As if I don't know that already. Try and sleep when you cannot make ends meet.

I shake my head before I reach for the pot of coffee and pour myself a cup.

I am twenty seven years old and I still cannot stand financially on my own. My small, nonexistent salary is not enough to pay the bills but I cannot leave this town without any money in my pocket, can I?

I take a sip from my bitter coffee and groan when I taste no milk in it.

Another sign of insomnia; absence of mind. I open the fridge and I see that I am short on…everything really. With a groan I grab the milk and shut the fridge before I sit back down on my chair.

When my coffee is adequate at last, I finish it quickly and put the dirty mug in the sink.

As I make my way to the bathroom I ask myself when my studies are going to finally pay off. My inner voice answers; _never_.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

An envelope is thrust in my hands as Mrs. Collins-Stoddard passes me by on her way into her cold, normally abandoned office.

"Jane, follow me, please." She calls and despite my throbbing head I follow her, plastering a small, warm smile on my face.

"Mrs. Stoddard." I greet and she turns to smile at me hugely.

Odd.

"Jane, how long have you been working here?" she asks me as she situates herself behind her desk.

"Um…a year?" I reply with hesitancy. Is she going to fire me?

"Well, I think this will make your day." She announces as she points at the seat across her desk.

Timidly I take the offered seat and gaze down at the file on my lap.

"You have been a great assistance but I think you can help me on this." Her beautiful face is bright and her eyes are happy.

Maybe she is not going to fire me. After all, I am good at making coffee I think with sarcasm and a small smirk.

"I need you to help me renovate the business. Bring new machines and everything. We are going to make changes in everything, starting with the exterior of the site." She tells me as she points at the file in my hands, "I know you have the knowledge to help me with the finances. I trust you in this because your father was a great help to me, God bless his soul." She smiles and I am a little confused.

"I am sorry…For all this…we need money."

She waves a hand at me, "We have the money. Don't let that be your concern. Will you help me in this?"

"Of course." My reply comes instinctively along with a smile. God knows I need something to occupy my head with. I need something more to do than making coffee and cleaning her desk.

"Fantastic. I want you to study my ideas and I want you to do some research. Find what everything will cost us and how soon we can have everything up and running. You will, of course, get a raise…About seventy percent." She adds and I almost swoon.

_Seventy percent?_

"I'm sorry?" I blurt out with shock and she smiles.

"Believe it, Jane. Our lives are about to change." Mrs. Stoddard winks at me and I am surprised that the usually uptight woman is in so high spirits.

"Might I ask the reason for all this new...luck?" I ask tentatively and she shrugs.

"A very special friend." She replies cryptically and I smile.

"Santa?" I suggest and she laughs.

"He might as well be!" she exclaims and I can't help but return her smile with one of my own.

Well, it looks like Mrs. Newton is going to finally stop pestering me about the rent. And who knows? I might even find a new house.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_A few days later…_

I take a sip of my wine and smile as I look down at the various receipts and papers that are scattered all over my small coffee table.

I put the glass away and make a grab for my small notebook. I start writing down the numbers and do the sums quickly before I write down the result.

As I sit there, lost in my thoughts, I can feel soft warm fur against my ankle. I pause and smirk.

"Hello, Tommy." I drawl as I reach for the wine glass again, "You want some?" I look down at him and just because I am in a very good mood I reach down and pick him up. I set him on my lap and smile.

"Now, I know what you must be thinking. How did Jane found the money for this wine? Well, Jane's luck smiled at her for once." I tell him and he mews at me with what I sense is fondness.

I scratch behind his ear and then lean back with my drink. I prop my feet up to the couch next to me and Tommy curls to my side.

For once I decide not to send him to his mistress. I am in a good mood after all.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

"This is the final total." I say as I hand Mrs. Stoddard the report she had asked from me, "It includes everything along with our year's expenses." I smile as she takes the report and grins at me.

"Excellent. Let us see who the best is now." She mutters as she opens the door to her office and invites me in.

She pauses and I almost collide with her back. My head barely misses her shoulder and I stagger for a moment. I grab at the door for support and rub my arm that had collided with the threshold.

"What are you doing here?" Mrs. Stoddard speaks up and I try to look over her shoulder.

"I apologize, Elizabeth. But I decided to stop by and see how everything progresses." The man's voice is smooth and elegant and I frown.

_Man?_

"You did very well, Barnabas." Mrs. Stoddard replies and then she moves from in front of me.

Once my vision is clear of any obstacles I finally see the visitor. I frown at the pale man who is sitting behind the desk.

Who is he?

"Here, take a look at this. Jane prepared everything." Elizabeth places my report in front of him and he spares me a small glance and a quick, short smile before he looks down at it. No surprise that his stare does not linger upon me. I am almost always invisible. It is not that bad. It has proven helpful a lot of times.

I don't smile back because I am too busy studying him and because he wouldn't even notice it. I can see a hat and a walking stick on the desk and I frown. Who still carries a walking stick?

The man's dark eyes peruse my report and I frown at how out of place he seems. He looks as if he is extremely uncomfortable but at the same time he exudes an air of elegancy that even Mrs. Stoddard must envy.

His hair is dark and a complete antithesis with his complexion. Not that I should talk. My dark hair is at odds with how pale I look.

"This is very satisfying, Ms…" he looks up and suddenly his eyes are upon me.

"Walden. Jane-…"

"Ms. Walden. I must congratulate you." He cuts me off and I shut my mouth, "This is great help. You will be keeping books from now on and they are to be updated regularly, yes?"

I blink. Who is this man? And how can he speak about the business? Isn't Mrs. Stoddard the CEO of the company?

"Thank you." I mutter despite myself and I cross my thin arms over my chest.

"Jane, this is Barnabas Collins…A distant relative of ours. He will be assisting me from now on." Mrs. Stoddard explains to me as if she can sense my perplexity.

I nod because I don't know what else to do.

He pushes the report away and smirks, "Has Angel Bay heard about this?" he asks Mrs. Stoddard and I frown.

Angel Bay…The largest fishery in Collinsport. Well, the formerly largest fishery in Collinsport.

"That reminds me…A Ms. Angelique Bouchard came by today." I speak up and suddenly two pairs of eyes are upon me.

I grimace inwardly, "She was here when I arrived." I say and Mr. Collins finally turns his full attention on me.

_Oh, you're paying attention now, aren't you? _

"What did she want?" he asks with a frown.

"Nothing…She didn't answer me. She just said that she wished to see the new changes. She left before I had the time to ask anything more." I shrug at the memory of the blonde woman with the bright painted lips. She looked like a model from a fancy magazine. I can't even put lipstick on for God's sake; especially so early in the morning.

"Jane, do not allow her here again." Mrs. Stoddard says to me and I blink in surprise for her tone is rather dark all of the sudden.

"We need extra security for that. On what grounds should I banish her from the building?" I ask quietly and Mr. Collins speaks up instead of his relative.

"On the grounds that she is unwanted." He says quietly with a cocked eyebrow and I frown.

"Persona non grata…" I murmur and then nod, "I see."

He nods and then turns to Mrs. Stoddard.

Without further ado I turn and exit the office, leaving them alone.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

The workers are conversing loudly as I pass by them with the tray in my hands. The steaming pots of coffee smell delicious and since I actually managed some sleep last night the scent is tantalizing my nostrils. I take a big whiff of air and smile despite the pungent smell of fish that mixes in with the scent of coffee. I shouldn't complain about the smell. It pays the bills. Finally.

I flex my shoulders as I pass by the sorting unit and tighten my grip on the tray but something is wrong because I can feel my shoe gliding upon the floor with a shrieking sound. I loose my footing and the tray slips from my hand despite my attempt to hold onto it tightly.

A high pitched squeal that later will make my cheeks flush escapes my mouth but nothing happens. The collision I feared does not happen because a hand grasps my arm and steadies me before I fall on the slippery floor.

I gasp and place a hand against my chest even as I feel the hot coffee burning the skin of my feet.

"Are you alright, my dear?" a soft voice asks me and I look at my rescuer with wide eyes.

"Mr. Collins." I breathe with a small grateful smile and his mouth twitches slightly.

I frown. Is he _laughing_ at me? My cheeks burn with embarrassment as he slowly lets go of my arm and reaches up with his hand.

"I fear you must get another one...um, whatever this is." He murmurs with amusement as he holds up a piece of blueberry muffin.

I reach up and I can feel crumbs on my hair. I grimace and shake my hair to get them out and only then does a chuckle escape him.

I look up at him and he shakes his head.

"I apologize."

I wonder if the apology is sincere because specks of amusement are still evident on his face even as he assists in pulling the crumbs away from my hair.

Angry at my own clumsiness, I step back and shake my head.

"Thank you." I mutter as I wipe my hands on a discarded napkin.

A linen handkerchief appears before me and I take it with reluctance. Can that man be any more…odd?

"My pleasure, ah…It's Ms. Walden, yes?" he points a long, questionable finger at me and I nod.

"Yes."

_Finally you got it right_. I mutter inwardly.

"Be careful of your step." He tells me before he walks away with long languid strides.

As I watch him moving away I can see his walking stick by his side and I blink.

Once he is gone I shake myself and turn to the mess on the floor. As I gather the items and food from the ground and make my way to the closest garbage bin, I notice a figure standing just by the entrance, several feet away.

My brown eyes lock with the blue gaze of Ms. Bouchard and I frown at the expression on her pretty face.

She keeps the eye contact with me for a few seconds before she turns on her heel and walks away, her hips swaying with her footsteps.

I shrug and once I have everything in the bin I make my way to the bathroom to tidy my most probably disheveled hair.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

The walk to my house from the grocery store is short but the night has fallen and I quicken my step out of reflex. My eyelids feel heavy and I drag my feet with difficulty. I tighten my grip on the bag and stifle a yawn. I am surprised that I am sleepy so early but I am glad because I will probably sleep like the dead tonight.

I turn the corner and I sigh as I see my house. I slip my hand into my pocket and pull my keys out as I start crossing the street.

Tommy's wiggling tail greets me and I frown, "What are you doing out here?" I call out to him and a moment later he is gone from the pavement. I frown and look around for him but he's nowhere to be seen.

I swing my keys around my finger before I start walking again.

Suddenly there is a noise behind me but before I can turn and face the supposedly empty street invisible fingers hook on my coat and pull me back so hard that I gasp and let go of the bag.

I am slammed painfully against the pavement and I close my eyes as black dots explode in front of my vision. I groan and try to move but a high heeled boot is slammed against my throat, cutting off my oxygen and my eyes widen as I look up.

"Going somewhere?" a smooth female voice croons and I narrow my eyes, trying to see but I realize that I cannot. I blink again and again but nothing. Everything is black and the cold feeling of fear is crawling up my spine like an ice blooded snake.

"I don't think so." A cold hand grabs hold of my chin and I close my eyes in a foolish, hopeful attempt to clear my black vision.

Cool fingers trail down my cheek and then I hear a chuckle, "Just what I need." The woman murmurs in contentment and before I have the chance to speak her hand tugs hard on my hair, slamming my head against the pavement again.

I cry out when she does it again and as my consciousness slips away from my grasp I can hear a faint chuckle.

**End of chapter 1**

**Author's note: Still here? Good! Thank you for reading! Please review before you go. I would really appreciate it. More as soon as I have some feedback! :P**

**Check out my Facebook for news!**

**Xxx Lina :o)**


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N: Welcome back! A huge thank you to: MissMisc3, Karutz, nuckythompson, TinkerbellxO, Anon, dionne dance, ****AngeliqueBouchard1972, 88dragon06, Jay D. Moore, skycord1990, ForeverACharmedOne, XantheXV, BlooperLover, hannahhobnob, Jandra1969, mariangisborne, ElleWillBite. Thank you all for your support so far!**

**With this chapter I will either lose you or win you...Let me know, please. I am going for something new with this...Ahem, on with the chapter then!**

**Oh and Angelique lovers beware...Don't hate me much...:P**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Chapter 2**

'_**He who makes a beast of himself,**_

_**gets rid of the pain of being a man.'**_

_**~Samuel Johnson**_

The first thing I feel as I start to wake up is the hard, cold ground underneath me. As I move my limbs, checking if they all work properly, I can feel my clothes sticking to my skin. I slowly open my eyes and lift my head slightly. Sharp pain erupts through my skull as I do so and I lower my head to the cool ground underneath me once more. I blink several times, trying clear my dark, blurry vision but no matter how many times I open and close my eyes the darkness does not disappear. I flex my leg muscles and slowly bring my knees up. I wince for my right leg feels numb and I reach down to massage it with my fingers.

As I try to sit up again, I try and fail to remember what happened. The last thing I recall is the sharp pain on my head as that woman, whoever she was, slammed it against the payment.

I grope around with my hand and I feel harsh, cold stone wall behind me. I slide towards it and lean my back against it as I use both my hands to massage life back onto my legs. I flex my toes and I can feel my shoes digging against them. At least I can feel them once more.

Sighing with relief, I pull my hands away from my knees and drop them to the ground next to my body. It's cold and slightly moist. As I take deep breaths, the scent of soil and something else, something foreign, reaches my nostrils. I blink rapidly again and swallow hard.

Where the hell am I? And why is it so dark and cold in here?

I hug my abdomen and I shiver as the soaked material of my jacket clings to me, chilling me to the bone.

I take deep breaths and I try to calm down. I crane my neck and try to think of one single person who would want to hurt me.

I scan my mind but I can find no one. I don't have any close friends and everyone at work seems to like me or at least tolerate me. Plain and simple: I don't have enemies.

As I move my head from side to side, trying to relieve the throbbing, I feel something warm and sticky at the back of my neck.

With alarm, I reach up and push my hair away from my neck before I touch my skin. It's sticky and my eyes widen as I bring my fingers to my nose.

"Blood." The word escapes me in gasp and I immediately remove my fingers from my nose. I wipe them against my pants and close my eyes, trying to push back the panic attack that threatens to overwhelm me. I take deep breaths but the scent of dirt around me doesn't help me much.

I open my eyes and when I do so, I notice a small glimmer of light coming from high above me. My eyes widen out of sheer relief and I exhale loudly as I realize that I can actually see.

The little bit of light that comes from above is not doing much but at least I know that it is no longer night. Testing my strength, I slowly stand up, wincing as pain erupts up and down my spine. I groan and lean against the wall for a moment before I start walking along the wall. My hands feel nothing but rock hard stones as I pace and the feeling of fear twists my stomach into a million knots again. I gulp when my palm brushes against something smoother than rock and I pause, squinting until I can finally see the outline of an old fashioned door. As I grope around for a handle I come to the dreadful realization that there is none. I lean my forehead against the cool surface and let out a sudden scream of sheer fury before I lean my back against the door.

As I stand there more light comes into the room and I look up but even as I lift myself up onto my tiptoes I cannot detect the source of the light. It looks as if…as if I am in a damn well! But then again, how can water wells have doors?

Groaning with disbelief at my unlikely situation, I start to walk around the confined space, massaging my temples in a vain attempt to clear my head and relieve some of the pain. It is to no avail and I stop after a while. I can feel that the blood has soaked the neck of my shirt and I reach up a dirty hand to touch the back of my head. I slip my fingers into my also sticky locks and feel around for the wound. I find it and I swallow thickly as I finger the gash. It is not too deep but it throbs and stings as I touch it.

I abruptly pull my hand away and look at my dirty fingers. The last thing I need is an infection. I touch my clothes and I unzip my jacket so that I can tear a part of my still white shirt that lies underneath. I bunch it up and place it against the wound on my head, wondering if anyone is going to show up and tell me what the hell I have done.

My first instinct is to start pounding at the door but fear keeps me from doing so. Other people might do it but I won't because I have no idea what kind of lunatic is lurking behind my locked door.

My nervous eyes take in the space around me and it is then that I realize that a large bottle of water is lying on the ground by the right side of the cave. That's what it resembles anyway; a cave or a tomb. Either one. With the exception of the light that is coming from the slit above me.

Eagerly, I walk over to the bottle and pick it up. I uncork it and take a whiff just to make sure that it is water. It seems like water and as I take a small, timid sip the cool liquid feels wonderful down my parched throat. I pull it away from my lips too soon because I think I will need it later. Before I cork it again, I pour some of it on the torn cloth of my shirt and then press it against my head again.

Placing the bottle on the ground once more, I sit down and pull my knees up to my chest, straining my ears, hoping to hear something, anything really.

Dead silence fills the air and I shiver, pulling my jacket more tightly around myself before I lean my head back against the wall, keeping the soaked cloth against it. I close my eyes and before I know it exhaustion sucks me back into the depths of unconsciousness.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

A small slap against my cheek has me opening my eyes with a start. I gasp and look up. Icy blue eyes meet my own brown ones and I frown.

"Hello, Jane. It is Jane, no?" the woman in front of me asks and I am at a loss for words. I know this woman. I've seen her before. I've seen her when I applied for a job and her company rejected me.

In front of me, looking as beautiful as ever, is Angelique Bouchard.

My eyes take her in and I swallow hard as I see her long midnight blue dress and her perfectly styled blonde hair.

"What do you want?" I ask before I can stop my tongue and she laughs.

"That is not very polite. Especially when I've brought you all this." She says coolly and my terrified eyes go to the large tray of food next to her feet. Next to it there is a bag.

I snap my eyes back to her face, "What are you?" I whisper because I know that whatever way she used to catch me and bring me here was not normal. I can remember the way she flew me all the way to the pavement without even touching me.

Her eyes narrow when I speak again, "Where am I?"

She clicks her tongue and stands up, crossing her arms over her chest, "Questions, questions." She murmurs and then she smiles.

"You will receive your answers shortly. In the meantime, eat." She tells me and even as my stomach growls at the smell of food I am too stubborn to do as she asks.

"What do you want from me? I barely know you." I shake my head and she sighs.

I continue nonetheless, "Is it about the company?" I ask and she pauses, her eyes narrowing suddenly.

"Pray tell, what are you talking about?" she drawls and I gulp.

What do I mean? I am not even sure. But what I know is that I had asked her to leave the last time she had come to the Collins' business.

"I…asked you to leave." I blurt after a moment and I am shocked when she lets out a loud cackle. Goosebumps appear on my skin at the sound and she leans down towards me, patting my cheek patronizingly.

"Oh, my dear girl. This has nothing to do with you. Your existence is insignificant but you will prove a great tool to my plans." She pulls her hand away when I slap it away from my cheek with irk, "If you survive long enough that is." She adds as she eyes me up and down with disdain.

"_If_ I survive?" I echo before I slowly start sitting up, "What the hell does that mean?" I exclaim but a sharp force pushes me back down on the ground with the single wave of her hand. I groan and stand up again only to be pushed down with more force this time. My back finds the wall with a loud thud and throbbing pain makes me see stars.

My eyes widen in shock and she simply smirks at me, "Eat." She repeats before she gazes at my half empty bottle of water. With a click of her fingers water fills it to the brim and as she walks out of my prison I am left staring at the bottle with wide, horrified eyes.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

I swallow the last bite of the sandwich and wash it down with some water before I reach out for the bag that is next to the now empty tray. I slide my hand inside and my fingers brush over a thick material that feels like a blanket. With hopeful eyes I pull out the item and I sigh with relief when I see that it is indeed a dark green blanket. I look inside the bag and I also detect two pairs of shocks. I frown but I realize that if I change my wet shocks I might warm up. I look at my long discarded shoes and slowly remove my soaked shocks. I put on the fresh ones and then pull the blanket around me.

As I lean back I notice that my cell is darker than it was before I started eating. The feeling of dread presses heavily down on my chest and my fear of the unknown has me shaking despite the blanket that is draped around my shoulders.

I huddle closer to the blanket and as I think back to my boring life, I shake my head at the irony. My financial problems, my loneliness, Mrs. Newton and even my insomnia seem nothing when compared to the situation I'm in at the moment.

In my whole life I have been thinking reasonably. I've always tried to be realistic but that woman's existence alone has me questioning my own life; the world I have been living in. As I think back on the way she caught me, on what she did, I can't help but feel betrayed by the world around me because everything that I had thought to be true were nothing but a lie. A big, ugly _lie_.

oOoOoOoOooOoOoOoOo

I don't know how many days I've been in here. I've cried, I've screamed till my throat was raw and itchy but she didn't grace me with her presence any of those times. She always comes in the middle of the day to bring me food and no matter how many times I've provoked her, no matter how many times I asked her why she keeps me here she just laughed at me and left me with a million questions on my tongue.

So, I decided to stop talking to her. She doesn't seem to mind it. It is like my presence is something she just _has_ to tolerate. I am a mean to an end; an end that is unknown, foreign to me.

I pull my gaze away from my lap when the door opens and she struts in.

She kneels next to me in silence and as she does so I can see that her face is flushed, her hair disheveled. There are nail scratches on her pale neck and I frown.

"What-…"

"Silence, you idiot!" she snarls at me and my heart drops to my chest when she grabs my arm and pulls up my sleeve. I struggle and she wraps the long pale fingers of her left hand around my neck, slamming me painfully hard against the stone wall.

"Keep still or I'll cut out your tongue. Don't think I cannot hear your pathetic cries every night. Now, _shut up_." She hisses in a deadly voice and I bite my tongue hard.

She reveals my pale wrist and my eyes widen in horror when she cuts me with a knife. She squeezes my hand and I curl my fingers into a fist as sharp pain runs through my arm. With a wave of her hand my drops of blood are gathered into a small vial. When she is done, she thrusts my bleeding hand away from her and stands up. She corks the vial and without looking at me she turns and walks out of my cell, locking the door behind her.

I can hear her footsteps as she walks away and a few minutes later I hear a loud, hoarse but very _male_ scream.

All the hairs on my body stand on end at the sound and I cradle my hurt hand against my chest as everything goes quiet again.

"Jesus Christ." I whimper but not from the sting of the wound on my wrist. It's because I realize that I am not alone.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

I look down at my wrist and finger the line of caked blood that is staining my otherwise pale skin. I swallow hard as I fail to recall how many times she has taken my blood. She doesn't take much, mind you. Just small amounts; a few drops. I have stopped analyzing her actions because they make no sense. I am afraid asking her more questions. She seems very furious these last couple of days. I've always thought that there was this odd glimmer in her eyes but now it is more pronounced; more apparent. This woman…this witch, because no matter how ridiculous it sounds there is no other word to define her, is dangerous. She is one of those people you watch in horror movies. The ones who are calm one moment and the next they are screaming for nothing in particular. She doesn't seem just insane to me though. No, there is method behind her insanity and whatever she is planning it is not good. I am a part of that plan but I try not to think about it too much. I'll go crazy if I think all the time; if I wonder what she does with my blood. My skin crawls at all the possible scenarios.

With resignation, I pull my eyes away from my wrist and gaze at my hands. I grimace.

I am dirty. _Really_ dirty. Blood and mud and sweat are sticking to my skin and I'd give anything for a bath. My appetite is gone too. She never misses to bring me a meal, don't ask me why, but I just cannot eat. Especially now that I know that I am not the only one she keeps in this place.

I hug myself and start pacing my prison, trying to ignore the smell of my own bodily fluids that are polluting the air. She used to clean everything at the beginning but not anymore. It's like she just doesn't care because something in her plan went wrong.

I am pulled put of my grim thoughts when the door opens and she comes in. She wrinkles her nose as she storms over to me.

"This place is disgusting." She mutters as she grabs my arm and starts pulling me out of the room, "No matter. You have won a bath. Once you achieve your purpose." She grins at me widely and I dig my heels to the ground, trying to halt her movements.

"Where are we going?" I ask but she just tugs harder until I can do nothing but follow her.

"You shall see." she murmurs as she pulls me down a long corridor that smells exactly like my cell.

My horrified eyes try to see clearly in the dark but it is of no use.

She stops at last and I frown as I see the outline of a door.

"Where are we?" I whisper and as she unlocks the door she smiles at me. She then closes her eyes and waves her hand against the unlocked door. A small glimmer flickers before everything is dark again. I stiffen.

"We're paying a visit to my friend." She replies before she thrusts me inside the room.

I stagger as she throws me in and my eyes scan the room. In the dark, I can see the outline of a man huddled against the corner. I swallow thickly and turn to look at Angelique.

"Won't you say hello to our friend?" she calls out to the man and he stirs a bit.

I take a reflexive step back.

"How very rude, my love. Especially when she has been offering her blood to you so generously." She croons as she takes a step forward and slams the door shut with a wave of her hand.

I shiver as she approaches the man.

"Don't you want her? I've brought her specifically for you." She murmurs and I can see that she is trying to touch the man but he is flinching away from her as if her touch is the fire itself.

"Remember how she tastes, hmm?" she murmurs and I can hear a faint growl coming from him.

I take a step back until my back is pressed against the door. I grope around for a handle but again I found none. My blood? She has been giving him my _blood_? Whatever for?

"Just take a whiff and you'll see that I am telling the truth." She purrs and there is some movement.

My eyes sting and I close them but before I know it there are tears pooling behind my closed eyelids.

"Again." She commands him and I gulp as I hear him smelling the air noisily. My knees threaten to buckle from under me as I hear him shuffling his feet in an effort to stand up.

Reluctantly, I open my eyes and I scan the semi dark room, trying to fully see who the man is and in what state he is.

"Don't you think it's time to try it, hmm? _Really_ try it? It'll do you good. Remember what we agreed? You do this and I'll let her live. Remember how you begged me? Now do it." She hisses the last sentence and before I can even blink I am picked up from the ground. A hand coils around my waist and another one weaves itself through my hair. A cool nose is pressed against my cheek and the man holding me lets out a strangled moan that makes me tremble.

"Please." The whimper escapes my lips and I keep my eyes open despite my fear. All I can see is the outline of Angelique's form as she stands a few feet away and the man's dark hair. His hold around me is so strong, like a vice and no matter how much I writhe I cannot break free. His hold is like iron around me, unbreakable, unyielding and I shudder to think what the hell he's going to do.

A low growl vibrates between us and I can feel the man's body shaking with it as he drags his nose to my neck. He lingers for a moment before he brushes his cold lips against my neck. My dried blood must be still sticking to my skin there but he does not seem to mind. No, he certainly does not mind because he inhales deeply and my eyes widen in disgust. I stiffen and a whimper breaks free from my throat as I feel him parting his lips over my skin. A hoarse cry leaves my mouth as sharp teeth bite into my skin, tearing it and my muscles flex as I try to move away from the pain, away from _him_. My hands curl around his clothes and my eyes widen in horror when I feel and hear his satisfied moan against my neck. Before I have time to comprehend what exactly he is doing, I start getting dizzy and before I can scream, let alone blink, I fall limply against him. I know no more.

**End of chapter 2**

**Author's note: Ahem, did I lose you? No? Fantastic! You see now that this is indeed different from my other fics, hmm? I told you. :P**

**Please, please review before you go. All your questions will be answered when Jane will start realizing what exactly is going on. ;o)**

**Join me on facebook for news, info and fun!**

**Until next time!**

**Xxx Lina :o)**


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N: Welcome back! I hope you all had a great Christmas!**

**A huge thank you to:**** TinaG646, ****JohnnyDeppLover44, MissMisc3, SweetMusicDreamer, LabyFan23, Jandra1969, Makrciana, nuckythompson, ForeverACharmedOne, cherrysoft, ElleWillBite, TinkerbellxO, dionne dance, Karutz, hannahhobnob, AngeliqueBouchard1972, XantheXV, CharlieCats, BlooperLover and mariangisborne. You all rock for sticking with me! **

**I hope you like the developments. Let me know, please!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Chapter 3**

'_**Jealousy is a tiger that tears not only its prey but also its own raging heart.'**_

_**~Unknown**_

A gasp escapes my throat the moment I wake up. My eyes snap open with a start and the first thing I feel is sharp pain on my neck. I reach up with my hands and rub my blurry eyes, trying to push the fuzzy feeling away from my tired vision. My eyelids feel heavy and swollen and my cheeks are wet with tears but I am no longer crying. I blink rapidly and as the feeling of grogginess leaves me, I can feel the hard ground underneath me. As I move my head, I can feel the edge of my blanket under my skull. The movement of my heavy head brings more pain on my neck and I cry out as I realize and recall the reason.

My hand flies to the side of my neck and I finger the two bite marks, feeling sick to my stomach as I do so. A huge gripping feeling of fear twists my insides into tiny knots and I quickly sit up. I push my fingers against the marks and I am glad to find out that blood is no longer leaking from them. I finger the area around the bites and a wave of nausea turns my stomach as I recall the way the man's lips and tongue had touched my skin with hunger and eagerness. I feel as if I can still sense the wetness of his saliva on my pale skin.

I grimace and clutch my stomach as I realize what really had transpired the day before. I could swear that I can still feel him on my skin but I know it's absurd. I feel as if I am in another reality. A reality where witches and monsters _do_ exist.

My eyes take a look around the confined space I find myself in and it is then that I notice the tray of food next to me. I place a hand over my mouth because the mere sight of it makes my nausea even worse.

I look away. Big mistake. My eyes take in my bloodied clothing and I realize with a start that I am covered in my own blood. I close my eyes and take deep breaths, trying to calm my constantly twisting stomach but as I do so I can smell the metallic scent of blood and the remnants of a different scent. A scent that belongs to _him,_ and in different circumstances it would have been almost pleasant. But now it's not. Now it makes me sick. I double over and I know that I can no longer hold it in. My pitiful excuse for dinner leaves my mouth bitter as I vomit and I grope around desperately for the water bottle.

Once I have it in my hand I take a sip, washing the disgusting taste from my mouth and then I clean my hands as best I can. Once they are at least adequate I splash my face with water. I don't feel any better but at least the cool liquid feels good on my too hot skin.

I press my hand against my forehead and I almost gasp when I feel how scorching my skin feels.

I shuffle backwards until I am pressed against the wall and lean against it while clutching the water bottle to my chest. I can feel my heart beating wildly against my ribcage as I recall the pain, the dizziness and the man's heavy breathing against my skin and I feel violated in a way that I have never felt before. I try to put a name, an identity on the man but my brain does no work the way I want it to. My head is a haze of fear, shock and dread and all I can do is feel my body trembling from all the exhaustion, anger and panic. My body feels as if a train has passed over it but I thank God that I am still alive.

_Are you sure about that?_ My inner voice cuts through the slight comfort of my thoughts and I shudder. No, I am not sure because I have no idea what else she has in store for me. I am dreading the minute she'll come back.

My fingers itch to touch the bite marks again and as I try to resist the urge I can't help but feel claimed, owned by whoever did this to me. I scowl as I think back to his fierce hold and I am sick at the perversity of it all. He sounded, and felt, crazed and I can't help but wonder if Angelique has done something to him. He just didn't seem aware of his actions.

I roll my eyes at my own thoughts. I shouldn't care because he hurt me but as I think back on the way he flinched from the witch's touch I can't help but be suspicious. What if that man, that creature or whatever he is, is as much of a victim as I am?

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_I find myself curled up on a luxurious bed. The green satin beneath me feels incredibly soft but cold where I am not lying on it. I reach out and run my fingers up and down the expensive fabric and my eyes suddenly notice the scars on my wrist. I shudder and close my eyes, trying to remember where exactly I am but I cannot. All I know is that I feel safe and…comfortable._

_My eyes snap widely open when I hear the click of the door opening and closing behind me. I stiffen as footsteps, hesitant footsteps, approach the bed I am lying on and no matter how much I want to turn and face the intruder I don't dare do it. Not because I am afraid but because I can feel a certain aura coming from this person, whoever he is. The footsteps stop by the bed and I can hear soft albeit a bit uneven breathing. Someone clears their throat and I tense up reflexively. I still don't turn around to see who it is._

"_Jane?" _

_My name is uttered in the softest of voices and a shiver runs up and down my spine at the sound. I don't respond because in a weird way I do not know exactly where I am…or who he is even though his voice does sound a little bit familiar. All I know is that I feel so good lying on this bed._

_Said bed dips behind me as he climbs on to it and a moment later I feel fingers in my hair, gently massaging my scalp. I flinch from the surprising gesture and he freezes in mid-motion. He stops moving his fingers but I can still feel them entangled in my strands._

"_Jane, why did you leave like that?" he murmurs and I frown. I do feel upset for some reasons but no matter how hard I try I cannot figure out why I feel…odd._

_He lingers for a moment and then I can feel him moving behind me, slipping closer while pulling his hand from my hair. I can see long, pale fingers as he wraps an arm around my waist and I gasp inaudibly as he folds his arm over my stomach and presses his front against my back. I can feel the way he folds his knees behind mine and I can feel his breath on my cheek as he places his chin on my shoulder. As he breathes, I feel his cool breath hitting my cheek in a rhythmic pattern of long but cold puffs of air. Why is his breath so cold?_

_The question does not linger on my mind because then I can smell him. A warm vanilla scent assaults my nostrils and I close my eyes, inhaling the heady scent deeply._

_I swallow hard and quickly open my eyes when he turns his head and presses a cold kiss on my temple. His finger follows suit and touches that same place with the smoothest of touches. I freeze when I realize that everything about him is cold and…hard. His body feels like stone but as I look down at his hand I can see that it is as white as expensive marble. As I sit in his arms, I can feel his iron grip on me. I don't know if he's using so much strength on purpose or not. Perhaps he's doing it unconsciously because the rest of him is gentle._

"_I love this little scar…" he murmurs and I frown._

_What scar? I don't have a scar on my temple…Or do I?_

_I reach up and finger the small patch of skin and for sure he is right. There is uneven and rough skin there._

"_Do you remember how you got it?" he asks me and I frown before I slowly shake my head._

"_No?" he sounds disappointed and my frown deepens as he continues, "You got it while trying to protect me." He breathes as his finger touches the rough patch of skin again, "Me." His voice is incredulous but it holds wonder in it and can't help but feel warm at the awe in his voice._

_I swallow hard and turn my head slightly to the right. I catch his jaw with the corner of my eye and I can see that his face is also pale, remarkably so._

_As I remain quiet, he sighs and shakes his head, "But that's in the past." He mumbles as he fingers my shirt buttons with his fingertips, "Now, why did you leave?" he asks again and I try to speak, to tell him that I have no idea what he's talking about but as I do so I realize that my throat is clogged, that I cannot speak._

"_You have to realize that these people…are my family." He murmurs and I frown hard, shaking my head as I do so, "Yes, they are…They have accepted me for who I am. I belong with them." He continues and I stop shaking my head, deciding to just listen to him. I might understand him if I hear him speak._

"_Regrettably, you'll have to share my affections with them." He whispers and my eyes widen._

_Affections? What on earth is he on about? Does he think that…that I love him or something? I don't even know him. Or does he mean that he…loves me? Impossible. This must be a dream, I am certain of it._

"_But no matter how I feel about them there's nothing that can come between us." He murmurs and I shiver at the tone in his voice, "Because you and I are meant to be together in this. We're going to forget this together." He carries on in a firm but at the same time gentle tone and I blink in confusion._

"_I also don't want you to be…" he trails off and I turn my head slightly as he tightens his hold on me, "envious of…" he stops and I wait but he does not continue his sentence. Instead he raises his hand and trails the back of his fingers down my cheek in a caress, causing me to shiver and flinch._

"_No matter." He whispers as he brushes his thumb across my lips, "No one is going to tear me away from you. I swear it." His voice is resolute and I take a deep breath, firm on my belief that this time I will speak but I can't and he sees it as a sign to continue._

"_Now go to sleep. The party will be done soon and there will be quiet again." He tells me as he reaches out and pulls the green covers over me, "Is the music bothering you?" he asks as he covers me with the coverlet and I think about it before I slowly shake my head. I've always loved music but I can hear none from here._

_He chuckles and pats the covers around me, "Good." He presses a feather light kiss to the top of my head and then pulls away, "I must return, for Victoria…" he trails off and once more I frown. It is ridiculous how many times I've frowned in the past few minutes._

_He clears his throat and removes himself from the bed, "Sleep, dear." He murmurs and it sounds as if he's eager to leave._

_He pats my leg through the covers and then-…_

"Wake up, girl." A sharp poke at my aching ribs wakes me up with a start and I gasp. I blink several times and my eyes fall on the woman in front of me. Angelique is looking as pretty as ever and I suddenly feel sick of my own skin.

"You need to drink this." She thrusts a tall glass of what looks like orange juice towards me. I look at it with dread and she chuckles.

"It's just juice, I assure you. Now drink it." The smile leaves her face and I take the glass. I take a small sip and it feels cool but it makes my throat burn. I know then that I am on the verge of being sick. My skin feels too hot anyway.

As I drink, she walks around me and kneels next to me. She pushes my stringy hair away from neck with a groan of disgust and then I can feel warmth up my skull. I then realize that she's healing the gash on my head. The dizziness immediately leaves me and I am only left with the pain on my neck.

"There." She snaps as she lets go of my hair and stands up, "Now," she eyes me up and down and a sudden wave of pure derision takes over me as she looks at me.

"You need a bath." She tells me and then reaches down to pull me up.

She looks around my cell and waves her hand in a languid circling motion, cleaning away all the evidence of my presence.

"All better." She grins and then starts tugging me towards the door.

"Why are you doing this? What have I ever done to you? I am talking to you!" I snap and tug my arm from her hold, throwing the half empty glass of juice to the ground.

She eyes the broken glass with a calmness that unsettles me and then raises her ice blue gaze to my face.

"I will tell you this one last time and it will do you well to get it through your thick skull." She takes a step closer and I fight against the urge to cower under her glare, "This is not about you. I am simply using you for a greater purpose. And it seems like I've chosen well. He won't ever turn to look at you twice. He's only interested in one thing; your blood which in some odd way satisfies him more than any other's." Her eyes take me in with incredulity, "Shocking, really." she cocks an eyebrow and I scowl at the demeaning look in her eyes.

"Why is he interested in my blood?" I ask in what I think is a strong voice and she frowns.

"Are you an idiot? Haven't you figured out what he is by now? Your records showed that you're at least clever." She says with sarcasm and I am reeling from her words.

"He drinks blood…" I start and falter, "Then he is…"

"Yes?" she laughs when I don't continue and shakes her head, "He is the big fish, dear. The big, bad monster you've been reading in fairytales." She leans a bit closer.

"Monster?" I whisper and she nods.

"He's a vampire, my little fool, and I can make him do whatever I want. You're not that bright after all." She leans back and away from me before she grabs my wrist again and starts tugging me out of the cell.

"Now it is time for you to clean up." She says in a low voice and as she pulls me behind her I still can't get over her words.

Vampire? _Vampire?_ I repeat the word in my head, trying to convince myself to believe it and I do believe it because now everything makes sense.

Of course.

That's why she can make him do as she pleases. Because he's thirsty and dependant on her to sate his thirst. Because he's not free; just like me.

A feeling of panic overwhelms me and I stop walking. She glares at me.

"Do you enjoy being dirty, you idiot? Because you're testing my limits!" she hisses at me and I gulp before I speak.

"Who…who is he? Does he have a name? What do you want from him?" I ask and she grins.

"Are you playing me for a fool?" she asks and I falter.

"No…"

"You claim not to know who he is." She narrows her eyes and I open my mouth to speak but I think it better and nod instead.

She releases my wrist and steps closer to me. I take a step back and I can feel the hard wall of the dim-lighted corridor behind me as I do so.

"You don't know him?" she repeats and I shake my head in denial, "So, you don't know him." She murmurs and then she smiles, "Then I am going to keep it a surprise." She says at last and I frown.

"But why-…"

"Now get moving or I'll let you rot in your own filth." She cuts me off and my eyes widen at the threat because I really want to get cleaned up.

"I'll move." I whisper and she smirks before she turns around and carries on pulling me behind her.

I follow in silence because her words just made me realize that the person…the vampire, is someone I know. The thought frightens me even more now; so much more that I forget about my odd dream.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_A few days later…_

The pieces of bread and cheese feel stale on my tongue as I chew on them absentmindedly but I don't stop until my stomach feels full. I push the tray away and idly rub my forearm because the incisions make my skin itch. I frown as I hear a little bit of noise, as if someone is shuffling something down the corridor but I try not to let it get to me. I hear a lot of noises while in here and so I have learned to ignore them as long as they don't mean something bad for me.

I crack my neck and the bite marks throb as I do so. It's interesting how she didn't heal them too. But of course she, like she said, has plans for me. When I first learned of what exactly that man is I had a brief panic attack but then I realized that she probably would never want him to make me a vampire…Or perhaps you could not be one after having been bitten by one…Perhaps you are born one and not...

I groan and cover my face with my hands.

"Ridiculous." I hiss and pull my hands away before I look around my prison.

But what else can I think about? Freedom? Freedom looks rather unlikely especially when the door is locked. I now know that she also has…_wards_ on the door; magical ones so even if I unlocked the door, I'd still wouldn't be able to get out.

I had thought of climbing up the wall towards the light but my body was never an athletic one so I doubt it could take the strain.

Sighing with sheer boredom, I lean back against the wall and hug my knees. I bite down on my lip as I think over my situation and I don't stop until I taste blood. I hiss but I don't have time to mull over my clumsiness because there are footsteps approaching. I quickly scamper to my feet just as the door opens and she comes in.

My mouth falls open when she thrusts an unconscious man inside the cell. He falls onto the ground limply and my wide eyes go to her.

She's breathing heavily and she eyes me with what I can tell is distaste before she waves her hand at me. Invisible hook-like fingers grasp my shirt, the shirt she gave me to wear after washing up, and pull me forward towards her. I cry out from the sheer shock of it but she's relentless as she walks out of the cell and drags me with her.

"You little…" she trails off, her voice nothing but a hiss, "He wants you. He'll get you." She says in a low voice and my eyes widen as she unlocks his door and unceremoniously slams me inside. I hit the wall face first and groan as I grope around for something to hold onto. My fingers grasp the first thing they can and I freeze when I touch a man's forearm.

"You like playing the difficult." I hear Angelique say and the man doesn't respond but I can hear his strenuous breathing next to me. The hand I am clutching on moves under mine and his strong fingers clasp my wrist. I cry out as he jerks me to my feet.

"You want her." She continued as she looks at us, "Let us see if you can keep her." She hisses at him and even though I can see her crystal clear, the man's face is obscured by shadows.

"Let's see how strong you are, shall we? I am waiting." She continues and I am pulled closer until my chest is brushing the man's. Cold fear grips me hard but I don't make a sound as I see his face coming closer to me. He inhales deeply and his cold, ice cold, fingers go to the marks on my neck. He is just brushing them with his fingertips but I shudder. He notices and coils an arm around me just as Angelique moves closer.

"Get on with it." She hisses at him but he only growls and pulls me closer. His nose brushes mine and by the time he is just a breath away from me I am shaking with horror. Some light falls into the room and I can see the outlines of his nose and lips. My throat goes dry when I notice that his glimmering eyes are fixated on my lips.

_God._

He can see the blood on my lip. I try to lean back but it is of no use for he's already coming closer, moving towards my lips. A low growl vibrates in his chest and I whimper quietly. In a swift move he has my bloodied lip between his lips and my eyes widen at the sudden, unexpected movement. I am shocked because he does not bite…There is no pain. He just…sucks on the cut.

He buries his hand in my hair, keeping me pressed against him as he drinks and I can hear his quiet, joyful grunts. Before I even have the chance to blink, an unseen force slithers its way between us and I am thrust away from him. My back hits the wall with a sickening thud and I can hear my bones crack as I find the unforgiving surface. My breath is knocked right out of me and black dots appear in front of my vision.

"No!" the command is loud and shrill and I shake as I look towards Angelique. Her cheeks are flushed with anger and I can see her trembling with fury.

The man growls and mutters something indistinguishable before he lurches towards her. With a push of his hand against her chest, he sends her back, back and against the opposite wall. She doesn't even make a noise but I can see her trembling with shock and anger as the man reaches me in a flash and wraps a possessive arm around me. In an instant he pulls me from the wall and crushes me against his strong chest in a fit of possessive rage. I can feel my side hurt from the force of his hold but I don't dare move. I simply wiggle but I stop when he growls.

"How dare you?" Angelique whispers as she eyes his arm around me, "How dare you touch her like that?" she hisses and slowly I come to the realization that she is…jealous.

I gape at her but her eyes are not on me.

"Release her at once. It's enough for today." Her voice is low and throaty but it does not seem like she can convince him because in a quick movement he pushes my hair behind my shoulder and leans down to my neck. In a flash his teeth are puncturing my marks and through my haze I can hear her loud reprimand.

"No!" her voice echoes in the walls around us and as he drinks from me I can hear Angelique getting closer. The telltale sounds of her heels are warning enough for her approach and in an act of stupidity I thrash in the man's hold. The only result I achieve is him puncturing my skin even further and I cry out.

The man freezes and draws his sharp teeth away, leaving only his lips on my bleeding skin and I whimper in pain.

I can now see Angelique in front of me and I realize that she's smirking, "_Victoria_, Barnabas." She drawls and the man behind me becomes as stiff as a board.

"Barnabas?" I whisper and through my blurry vision I can see that she is grinning while nodding her head.

"Release her." Angelique purrs and the man lets go of me with a snarl.

As I fall to the ground I have only one thought. The man, the vampire, who is infatuated with my blood is Barnabas Collins. My bloody employer.

**End of chapter 3**

**Author's note: Ahem, still here? Great! Please, please review before you go. I really want to know your thoughts. Cookies and hot chocolate to everyone who reviews! ;o)**

**For news, info and more check out my Facebook page. **

**Until next time, loves!**

**Xxx Lina :o)**


	5. Chapter 4

**A/N: Happy New Year! Welcome to the newest update. I hope 2013 is treating you well.**

**I want to thank my reviewers: Jandra1969, TinkerbellxO, CharlieCats, XantheXV, MissMisc3, SweetMusicDreamer, Jay D. Moore, 88dragon06, nuckythompson, Why Fireflies Flash, ForeverACharmedOne, PhyscoticOnna, Makrciana, mariangisborne, AngeliqueBouchard1972, cherrysoft, JohnnyDeppLover44 and dionne dance.**

**Thank you all for taking the time to comment. It means the world!**

**More of Barnabas and Jane's odd dreams in this chapter…Be patient until the second half of the chap…;o)**

**The chapter is dedicated to **_**Jandra1969, dionne dance and TinkerbellxO**_** for my own personal reasons…:D Thank you all for your support! And **_**TinkerbellxO**_**, congrats! You know why! :P**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Chapter 4**

_**The moment I set foot across the threshold of Lion's Keep I knew my fate was sealed. I had been here before, in desperate dreams and fevered fantasies, and always I knew it to be the place where he would finally ensnare me-the man of my dreams-the incubus of my nightmares. The dark stranger, my demon lover…**_

**~Incubus, Carol Goodman**

I have been counting the days since the last time I was brought to him. Five days. I know because I've been counting the times the light has entered my prison and left me bereft. The room is cold but what bothers me the most is the dampness the ground leaves on my clothes every time I sit down. It seeps into my pores and makes my entire body sore. I am in need of another bath but I have not dared ask for one.

Angelique has been acting strangely the last few days.

She seems on edge and every time she's in here she's looking at me as if she wishes to stomp me with her heel. As the days pass and I am left mostly alone I've come to realize why Mr. Collins had been so intent on banishing her from the business's grounds. There is something between them. An old vendetta perhaps but for Angelique there's more. She's in love with him. I snort loudly at that. What a nice way to show it.

The amusement leaves me as quick as it came. What does she want with him? And why did that name had so much power over him?

_Victoria._ That was the name. I frown because that name is familiar. I have heard it before in my dream. I shake my head. It cannot be the same woman. And the man in my dream cannot be Barnabas Collins. Impossible.

I shudder as I think about it. That man, that man with the strange attitude and manners is…is a vampire. A creature of the dark, a _monster_.

I wince and shake my head. I must not be quick to put labels on people…But he is not human, is he? Nevertheless, I do not think he's the real monster here. Yes, he has hurt me and I am terrified of what he can do to me. My neck still hurts from his assault and I can still taste him on my mouth- and I have to blush as I recall that particular scene because well, I am me- but he's not the one who has me locked in here to rot. He is not the one who has hurt me on purpose. She is and she won't even tell me why. And she won't tell me what happened to that man she had locked in here when she had taken me to Mr. Collins' cell.

I shake my head and lean back against the wall. I rub my hands together and I hate the remnants of uncleanness and pure grime that stain my skin. I grimace in disgust and I push my sleeves up. The wounds on my wrists are healing because she has not cut me to take my blood for a few days. I roll down my sleeves and shudder at the thought of what she has in store.

One thing is for certain. She was not expecting his reaction to me. She was not expecting the possessiveness and I am sure that if Angelique had not taken me from his cell he would have surely kept me there. I blink rapidly as I recall the strength of his arms. I had thought that he would crush my bones. I still have bruises on my side from his grip.

I rub my face with my hands and bite my lip. One question remains. Does he know who I am? I doubt it. The moment the witch had uttered the name Victoria he had immediately let go of me. I recall his trembling form as he had retreated back into the shadows and I had no time to speak because Angelique had hauled me out of the cell. She had relocked and warded the door and then she had dragged me back in here in silence.

I had been too shocked to talk to her or object at the time but I doubt if I can do so now. There are so many questions in my head but I am afraid.

On the other hand I am not sure if I will survive the next time she brings me to him. What if he cannot control himself? What if Angelique lets him kill me because of his reaction to me?

_Would he suck on your bloody lip if he wanted to kill you?_ My inner voice points out and I flush again. I have no idea. But I know that she can kill me or make him kill me any time she wants. More questions rise as I think about those two. What has happened between them? Why does he hate her so much and how did she manage to imprison him? He is so fast and strong and well, a vampire. Couldn't he kill her if he wanted too? But what if he, like me, had no time to react at the time? What if she tortures him too while she leaves me alone? What if she's trying to make him…love her or something? I remember her calling him her love. I snort because I cannot possibly link that woman to any kind of emotion, let alone love. But if someone can hate can't they love too? Those two feelings are separated by an almost invisible line. They are twins and one could easily step from one emotion to the other very fast.

I close my eyes because all these thoughts make my head pound. I shouldn't care but my foolish nature tends to make me sympathetic to other people's pain. What I should care about is my freedom. I have to come up with something. I may be human but I was known for my intelligence. I think.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

A bundle of clothes is thrust in my lap and I look up with wide eyes. Angelique is staring down at me with a sneer.

"Stand up." She mutters and I hesitate in doing so.

What does she want now?

"I won't repeat myself, little mouse. Stand up." Her words are uttered with impatience and I do as she asks after putting the clothes on top of my blanket.

"Take off your clothes." She states before she thrusts a towel to me. I grab it and I gape at her.

"Excuse me?" I ask and she rolls her eyes.

"Oh, please. I don't have the time for your dallying. Get on with it." She hisses at me with narrowed blue eyes and I gulp before I shrug out of the shirt. As soon as I have done so she waves her hand over my torso and the smell of plain soap reaches my nostrils. Has she…cleaned me? Whoa.

"I think you can do the rest yourself." She eyes me before she conjures up a a bar of soap and a bucket of steaming water.

When she is done, she turns to leave.

I panic.

"Wait!" she pauses by the door and turns to look at me.

"What?"

"How…how is he? You haven't take any of my blood." I bite out and her expression turns dark and stormy.

"What's that now? Are you worried about him?" she asks as she turns around and approaches me again, "It's because you have not looked in a mirror. He really has done a number on you." She eyes my neck and swollen lip with narrowed eyes and I immediately know that she's envious.

Jesus Christ the woman is mad. She can gladly take my place any time.

"It is different now, isn't it? I know him." I choke out and she takes a deep breath.

"So?" she quirks an eyebrow.

"It's not the same! He is not just some stranger. He is my employer." I snap and she smirks.

"Really? He doesn't seem to remember anything about you. He's only interested in what runs in your veins. He is just a predator that he will devour you without a second thought. You should be grateful I am here." She announces with such confidence and I am suddenly seething.

"Grateful? What you're doing is inhuman! Not only to me! I am not even sure he was drinking from humans before you brought him here." I snap with such force that she is surprised.

"He is no martyr, my dear. He has killed dozens of men before you. You're nothing different, nothing special." She is leaning closer now.

"If that is so, then why did you not keep that other man you put in here? Why didn't you use him? He disappeared." My voice is steady as the look in her eyes darkens.

"That man is dead. And if you don't hold that tongue of yours you will be dead soon too. And I won't even have to do it. I just have to take you to him. He is no less of a monster than I am. Don't fool yourself. This is not Beauty and the Beast. Even though I see no Beauty." She snickers before she turns to walk out.

"Wait!" I don't let her words hurt me because they are just words. I've always known that I am nothing magnificent, "Wait." I repeat and she falters, "What do you want from him?" I ask and she turns to me once more.

"Realization." She murmurs.

"Realization of what?" I am confused and surprised that she even answered me.

"That he belongs with me. That humans do not matter. That they disposable, that they are weak. But he and I…We are different. He must be thanking me for what he is. Once he realizes that you'll be free. Dead or alive. Either one." And then, she smiles a wide grin before she turns and walks out, leaving me staring at the closed door with terrified eyes.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

I am gathering my courage. I look at the empty glass of orange juice by the tray and I swallow hard. The taste of the bitter fruit is still heady on my tongue as I do so and I close my eyes.

Am I really going to do this? Yes, I am. I nod firmly and reach forward to pick up the glass. I look at the light that is falling into my cell. It is time. She will probably be here soon. I have to be quick. I turn around with the glass and eye the stone wall. I take a deep breath and pull my hand back. I slam the glass against the bricks and it shatters in two. The piece still in my hand cuts my thumb and I wince but as I look at the sharp edge of the glass I smile. I touch the tip and I am satisfied by the sharpness. I eye the door and I falter. What am I going to succeed with this? What if she snaps and kills me before I even have the chance to get to the door? I set my lips. Well, it will be better than waiting for it to happen. Because she'll do it. I have seen too much. She won't ever let me go alive.

I take a deep breath and nod. I have to at least try. I am not that much of a coward. I sit back and press my hand with the shard between my jean clad legs. I close my legs, hiding it from view and I wait.

Sure enough, some time later she arrives. I hear the clicking of her shoes and the incantation she mutters as she lowers the wards on my door. My heartbeat accelerates and my breathing quickens as I hear the click of the lock.

A moment later she's stepping through the threshold, looking as beautiful and arrogant as ever. Her hair is up in a complicated bun and she's wearing a low cut dress. To my eyes she looks like a highly paid prostitute. I almost smirk when I think of her reaction to such a name. She'd surely slap me or worse. She looks around her and nods her head.

"You've been very good lately. I think you deserve a present." She waves her hand at the ground and a blanket, a brush, a toothbrush and toothpaste magically appear on the tray.

"Now, I need that shirt of yours." She tells me and I blink.

"Sorry?"

"Your shirt. I need it. Take it off and I'll give you another one." She repeats with a fake smile on her lips.

I frown, "Whatever for?"

"You ask a lot of questions. Please do not ruin my good mood." Her eyes darken minutely and I swallow. I tighten my hold on the broken glass and lick my suddenly dry lips.

"Okay. But I've been having cramps. I need help to stand." I say in a deceivingly innocent tone and she sighs.

"You weak humans." She mutters but I watch with shock as she approaches me. She must be in a really good mood. I momentarily falter. What if I am wrong? What if I should just do as she says and be nice to her? She may leave me alone…

I have no time to mull over that new idea because she's too close. She will see the shard no matter what.

Her hand lands on my arm and she starts pulling me up. My fingers grip the glass more tightly and I grit my teeth. It's now or never. As she helps me stand I take a deep breath and before she has the chance to see it I pull my hand back and thrust the glass forward. It sinks on her upper arm and I am terrified when a loud scream leaves her mouth. Her fingers release my arm and I stumble back, alert enough not to let go of the glass. My back finds the opposite wall as she cradles her arm and looks down at it wide eyes. A large gush is visible on her skin but there is no blood. My stomach turns as I realize that she is not like me. She is…she is…I don't even have words for it. I take pleasure in knowing that she can still feel pain though. I blink and when her furious blue eyes lock onto my brown ones I finally become aware of my position. I am just next to the door, the very much ajar door. My eyes widen and I make a run for it. I can hear her seething behind me and as my foot steps on the threshold a force knocks me off my feet. I collide with the harsh ground with a loud groan and I gasp as pain makes my foot go numb. My breath is caught and I can feel my side aching from the force of my fall. I gather up the strength and roll onto my back just as she pounces on me. Her fingers close around my throat and as they press over the bite marks I cry out in pain.

My own fingers tighten around the shard and I don't care when my skin hurts from it. I have to push her off of me.

"You little insignificant maggot." She hisses and she looks so frightening that I am momentarily numb.

Her hand tightens the grip on my neck and I squeeze my eyes tightly shut before I raise my knees and push hard against her. The action takes her by surprise and her hold on me loosens. I lurch forward again and this time the sharp edge of the shard finds her chest. She gasps and looks down at her chest with shock before her terrifying eyes find my face. I kick out again and I manage to push her away but as I roll onto my stomach and try to move forward something sharp hooks on my ankle. I cry out when I realize that the same piece of glass that was on her chest is now on my leg. My breath gets caught in my throat as blazing hot pain runs up and down my leg. My hands claw at the ground under me as I writhe in pain and then I am grasped by my shoulders. She rolls me over and slams me against the ground so hard that I see stars and I grasp around for something, anything to push her off but I can't. I slap her hands away but she manages to thread her right one, her hurt one, in my hair. She tugs hard and I groan as she pulls me up to my feet. The pain on my ankle and side is indescribable as I try to stand but she is relentless. She was not expecting this and that made her angrier.

"If you scratch, I am going to bite, little mouse." She hisses and I am more unnerved when I smell the expensive perfume on her skin. What had she planned for today? For him? And why in hell did she want my damn shirt? I shouldn't care about that. What I should care about is the pain on my leg and the fact that my brave act of attacking her backfired. I am in worse shape than before and now I've managed to make her angry.

"You want to play? Let's play." She hisses as she starts walking, pulling me behind her by the hair. Like a bloody _ragdoll_. Her strength is abnormal and my scalp burns as she uses more force than necessary.

She drags me down the corridor and I start to panic. She's taking me to him. My throat closes up and my hands fly to her forearm, trying to stop her.

She slaps my hands away by waving her free hand at them. Two identical cuts appear on my skin and I whimper as I see blood oozing out of them.

_Oh God!_ What have I done? How stupid was I to think that I could actually win this? This was it. I am dead. And no one will ever find my body. It will be like I never existed. I start to hyperventilate but no matter how much air I take in I feel like I am suffocating. So this is the feeling of terror.

She stops at his door and mutters a few words before she opens the iron gate. She is thrusting me inside a moment later and my front collides with the wall across. I press my palms against the wall and turn around immediately, ignoring the pain on my ankle. The cell is dressed in much more light than my own and I momentarily don't see him anywhere.

My wide eyes scan the cell but she steps in front of me, obscuring my view.

"I fear you will not have the pleasure of my company today. Change of plans. But I've brought you something even better." At that she steps aside and I can finally see him. He's pressed against the wall across from me. His hands are flat against the wall and he looks like a mess. His most certainly expensive clothes are torn and dirty, his hair is tousled but what makes my breath stop is his face. His eyes are wide and have extremely dark circles around them, his cheeks are pale and his mouth…his mouth is bloodied. Caked blood is staining his chin and the collar of his shirt is stained with the red liquid as well.

My throat feels suddenly dry but what scares me the most is the lost look in his eyes. His gaze is shifting from Angelique's smirking face to her wounded arm and chest and back to me, particularly to my neck. It moves away from the crook of my neck only to eye the line of light in front of him.

My eyes widen when I realize the reason why he's pressed so tightly against the wall. He's afraid of the line of light! The glimmering sunlight is falling horizontally across the ground, creating a perfectly placed obstacle for him. He cannot approach or cross the room because of that. He cannot get to me as long as I am right here.

I breathe a sigh of relief but the comfort of my relief doesn't last long.

"Have a good time." Angelique smiles at him evilly before she turns to smirk at me, "See you later, my little warrior." She blows me a kiss and I glare at her with sheer hatred and distaste.

She cackles loudly and turns to leave. She locks the door and then we are alone.

I force myself to look away from the door and I look at him. His eyes are slightly narrowed and his gaze keeps flickering to my bleeding hands and ankle. I shrink back against the wall as he starts to move a bit forward.

I gasp when he hisses and steps back from the light. I swallow hard and I think of something, anything that would calm him down; to stop him from draining me the moment the light disappears. Because it will as soon as it's dark.

I wince as I step onto my hurt foot and I momentarily close my eyes.

"M-Mr. Collins?" I whisper and he merely blinks at me before he focuses back on the blood on my hands. I watch with wide eyes as he licks his lips and swallows thickly and I press my back even further against the wall. Good God he looks famished. Or thirsty. Either one. I resist the urge to cry and I focus on my goal; to make him recognize me.

"Do you remember me?" I ask and his eyes flash up to mine. He inhales deeply and his eyes darken.

"You're delicious." His voice is husky and I resist the instinctive impulse to cower.

_Delicious?_ Good _Lord_, he is referring to my…blood. I almost gag and I try a small smile.

"Well, thank you." I mutter and I want to slap myself but I need to focus.

"D-does light hurt you?" I ask and he frowns, his eyes not moving away from my neck.

"It can kill me." He hisses and I gulp.

"How…how long have you been thirsty?" I ask and I am not even thinking the words that are coming out of my mouth.

"Days." He whispers and his eyes get a far away look in them. I suddenly feel bad for him because even though I haven't been hungry I can understand how that would feel.

I gulp and look up at the light falling between us. It is strong and I can tell that it is noon. My heart drops to my stomach as I think what the night will bring.

I decide to give one more try, "Do you know who I am? You know me." I say quietly and he frowns deeply as if trying to push back the haze of thirst long enough to think. But I can see that all he can look at is my blood. He doesn't remember, he cannot remember. Not right now.

"I am Jane." I murmur but his frown only deepens. He cannot listen to me.

I sigh and give up. I shuffle down the wall until I am sitting and I stare emptily at my lap. The pain in my ankle, my sore side and ribs mean nothing because I know that he's going to kill me. I am certain of it.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

I don't know how much time has passed but as I look up and see that the light is slowly diminishing I can only gasp for breath. My eyes find him across the room and surely enough he's hesitantly walking along the wall, his eyes on the declining line of light between us. I quickly sit up, more alert than ever and my fear filled eyes follow the retreating light.

"Please." I whisper but of course whatever God is above me doesn't listen to me.

I can hear him growling softly and when I look up I see him flying towards me. My back finds the wall as his hands grab at my hair, my face and finally cup my head. His eyes are completely wide and the pupils dilated. His lips are parted as he eyes my neck and I squeeze my eyes shut for a moment, trying to compose myself.

His hold is strong but not painful and I am a bit relieved. I open my eyes and lick my lips.

"I am Jane, Mr. Collins. Remember me? The clumsy muffin lady as you once called me. Please, look at me." I whisper and his eyes focus on my lips for a moment.

"I am terribly sorry." He murmurs and I have no time to react. All I can do is stare at his mouth as he leans closer. He bares his teeth and I can see his elongated fangs. I try to pull my head backwards but he holds me fast. A moment later there's that familiar pain on my neck and I can't help it because the pain on my ankle is horrible, my hands sting and my side is throbbing with scorching heat. I close my eyes and let go. All I know is darkness.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_I think I am dreaming again. I feel no pain. I open my eyes when a chilly breeze brushes my hair away from my face and I gasp. I am standing at the edge of a peak. I cry out and flail my hands about, trying to keep my balance but as I look down at the crushing waves I can see that my feet are not touching the ground. I am standing on bloody thin air! I whirl around once and I almost smile. How on earth can I balance on thin air?_

"_I've been looking all around Collinwood for you." A smooth male voice calls and I turn around._

_From my place near the edge of the peak I can see two figures. One is of…_

_Oh my God. That's…Barnabas Collins and he's not looking at me. He's looking at a figure who's standing near the edge of the hill. As I look down I realize that it's a woman and that the woman is…me._

_I gasp and I clump a hand over my mouth. Can they…hear me? I don't think so because the woman-me- turns and looks at Mr. Collins from over her shoulder._

_I slowly lower the hand from my mouth as I stare at them. My eyes take in the landscape around me and I realize that I am suspended right above Widows' Hill._

"_Jesus." I breathe as I look back at the two people._

"_I am here." My twin replies as she turns to look back around. Her eyes-my eyes-stare right through me and I swallow hard._

_Is this…real? It cannot be._

"_What are you doing, Jane? You'll catch your death." Barnabas says and in his voice I can detect worry but his childish scolding doesn't seem to sit well with the other me._

"_I am fine." My twin replies quietly, almost too quietly._

_He approaches her and my eyes widen. Is she not afraid of him?_

"_What have I told you about wandering alone in the grounds?" he asks her softly and I can see my self's shoulders shaking. She doesn't reply and I frown. Why is she not talking?_

"_Jane?" he frowns and places a hand on her shoulder only to have her slap it away with force. He stares at his hand with wide, wounded eyes and then gazes at her with helplessness._

"_What have I done?" he murmurs and I, I mean __**she**__, takes a deep breath and abruptly stands._

"_Nothing." She whispers as she gazes out at the ocean._

_I cross my arms over my chest as I look at them and I frown. What in hell? What is the meaning of this? Am I insane?_

_I don't have time to think over that notion for long because he speaks again._

"_Did you have breakfast? You know you must eat-…" he starts but the other me whirls around to face him._

"_Do I ask you if you drink? Have I once asked you about Vi-…" she stops herself and covers her face with her hands before she lowers them and looks away from his perplexed and deeply troubled face._

"_Forget that." She murmurs and I approach them quietly. My feet brush against the edge of the hill and I can feel grass under my bare feet. I curl my toes over it and I let it anchor me there. I do not approach further._

"_Jane…Wait!" he grasps her arm as she tries to move past him and I gasp as I can feel the touch on my own arm. My eyes widen and I look back at the scene._

"_Don't go." He murmurs and the other me frowns._

"_I have to. It's time for my pill." She replies and my voice sounds hoarse, as if I am trying to keep back sobs, "Julia will be mad if I miss it again." She whispers as she looks pointedly at his hand. But he doesn't release her. I can feel his hold on her, _me_, tighten and I gasp. So does my other self. He pulls her closer and I am shocked when I feel coldness around me. His arms are tight around her and I can feel the fierce hold he has on her. My nostrils are once again filled with vanilla scent and I close my eyes. The coldness reaches my cheek then and my eyes snap open. His lips are on my cheek, _her_ cheek, and his fingers are entwined through her waist length hair. Her hair is longer than mine and it looks shiny. I doubt mine looks that good._

_My eyes widen when his lips slip lower towards her mouth. I freeze up and the only sound I can hear is the waves that are crushing to the shore below us. I watch and feel with bated breath as he presses his lips to the corner of her mouth but before he can even press closer she is pushing him away from her. She stumbles back herself and she gasps as her feet reach the edge of the peak. She staggers and tries to keep her balance and I gasp as I see myself stumbling backwards. But what I expect doesn't happen. Hands close around her wrists and they pull her back to safety._

_I look at Barnabas and he is so different that the vampire locked in the cell with me. He looks…breathtaking. His clothes are immaculate, his hair is pushed back and away from his face and his pale skin is a huge contrast to the overcast air around us. I only just realized that there are dark clouds over our heads._

"_Forgive me." I hear him murmur but the other me is shaking her head and already pulling away from him. He whirls around and his hand brushes through her hair until she is too far away for him to do so._

_I watch along with him as she retreats back towards the woods._

_I blink and I look at him. I open my mouth but once again I realize that I cannot speak. Suddenly, he turns towards me and his eyes lock with mine. I freeze but before I can tell if he's looking at me or right _through_ me I start falling. I gasp as an invisible force pulls me down, down towards the large waves. I fall into the ocean with a loud splash and the water is pressing down on my lungs, making it impossible for me to breathe. I gasp and gasp until my eyes finally close and I-…_

"Ah!" a loud cry escapes me and my eyes fly open. A strong hand is on my chest, pushing me down to the ground and I panic as I remember where I am and with who I am. I crane my neck and my heart drops to my belly when I see Barnabas Collins on his knees in front of me. He has one hand around my calf and he looks like he's going to be sick. Blood is on his face, his hands and clothes and I realize that I am alive, that he hasn't killed me.

_Yet._ My inner voice adds obnoxiously and I bat it away because then I feel extreme pain on my ankle. What the hell is he doing?

Then I see him leaning close to my hurt leg and I tense up.

"No, please!" I gasp but his hand clαmps down harder on my leg.

"Be still." He husks and I blink rapidly, "There's glass deep in your leg. I have to do this." he whispers as he shots me a look of utter guilt and desperation.

What happened? He seems…sober, sated. I reach up and finger my neck. The bite marks are throbbing and I realize that he must have drunk enough for him to be lucid. A little bit of relief rushes through me when I realize that he had enough control not to kill me but my relief does not last for long.

"Oh my God!" I shriek as more pain stabs my ankle and then I can feel the distinct sensation of suction. I quiver and grit my teeth against the pain and when he pulls away and spits the glass out of his mouth my eyes roll to the back of my head and I am lost to unconsciousness again.

**End of chapter 4**

**Author's note: Still here? Good! Thank you for reading! I hope I satisfied you with this extra long chapter. Please comment before you go. I need to know your thoughts. Also, feedback feeds the muse! So type something in that little box below! Thank you!**

**For news, info and covers visit my Facebook page. Link's on my profile.**

**Until next time, loves!**

**Xxx Lina :)**


	6. Chapter 5

**A/N: Welcome back! I want to thank the people who are reading this story and of course my reviewers: Jay D. Moore, Makrciana, MissMisc3, nuckythompson, Guest, , XantheXV, dionne dance, TinkerbellxO, AngeliqueBouchrd1972, ForeverACharmedOne, xxPaige23xx, 88dragon06, mariangisborne, BlooperLover, Jandra1969, VesperLogan12, smilin steph and hannahhobnob.**

**Thank you all for your support. It means a lot and I am not just saying that.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Chapter 5**

_**Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, **_

_**Wondering, fearing, doubting, **_

_**Dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before.**_

_**~Edgar Allan Poe**_

My eyelids feel heavy as I wake up and so I don't open them immediately. Everything hurts but I feel a bit warm. I frown because I am usually cold when I wake up in this place. I did not have any dreams this time. Or maybe I did and I do not remember them. I try to stir but I groan. My ankle throbs, my side aches and my head…My head is pounding and I have horrible cramps on my belly.

"Damn." I murmur as I turn on my side and coil an arm over my stomach in an attempt to rub the pain away.

The moment I move I hear it. Nervous fidgeting can be heard across from me. Then everything comes back to me. My eyes snap open and I sit up. The warmth covering me disappears at my abrupt move and as I look at my lap I see the dirty material of what looks like a coat there. I frown and my mouth goes dry as I raise my eyes upwards.

Across from me, pressed against the wall is him. He's looking at me with wide eyes and a firmly shut mouth. His hands are twitching by his sides and I can see that they are stained with faint pink blood; my blood. As I look up I expect to see the same red liquid on his mouth and chin but I do not. His face is clean albeit ashen.

My gag reflexes calm down a bit and I shift, wondering if I should pull the coat over me again…Does he need it? Will he think that I am forgetting what he did to me if I do so? But I am so cold and -oh, my God- I now understand what my cramps mean.

"Oh Jesus, no!" I exclaim and if this was a movie I would start laughing at the incredulity and irony of it all. Now he will surely kill me with all this blood that is technically _oozing_ out of me. Great moment for _her_ to arrive. I cover my eyes to hide my mortification and I can hear him clearing his throat.

"M-Ms. Walden." He starts and my eyes snap up to his, shame forgotten, because he said my name. My name. He remembers me.

"Y-yes?" I whisper and I want to pound my head against the wall behind me. Yes? What kind of an answer is that? Well, it's the only one I have.

"I…I fear that…that I have hurt you." He murmurs and I blink. He just realized that?

I can only stare at him. He looks…odd. Fidgety, startled and well, like he has just killed a puppy…Or two.

I take a deep breath but even that hurts. I don't dare move because if I do so I will have a terrible accident; a mortifying one. Good God, can I be any more unlucky?

My eyes move to my leg which is caked with blood and a terrible sight to behold. I wince and reach out to it but his voice stops me.

"Don't touch it."

I look up at him, startled.

"It might get infected." He adds so quietly that I almost fail to hear him. I notice for the first time that he's moved back to his side of the room. The light is falling inside our mutual prison, preventing him to get any closer to me. I frown. If light hurts him why didn't he stay to my side of the cell? My eyes widen when I realize why. Because he fears the proximity. Because he's a vampire and he can snap and drain me any time he wants. Or maybe I am wrong? But I cannot be because as I look up at him I can see that he's not even breathing. I can see his throat bobbing as he swallows back his hunger and I close my eyes, trying to compose my thoughts.

"You didn't kill me." I whisper before I even have time to censor my tongue.

"No." his voice is as quiet as mine but to my ears it sounds too loud in this quietness.

"Why?" I look at him then and I can see that he's avoiding eye contact with me. He presses further back against the wall before he breathes out a response.

"I cannot."

"You cannot?" I ask incredulously. Is it bad that I don't mind talking to him? I've been alone so many days, or weeks-I am not sure- that I need to talk with someone who is not demeaning me at every turn.

"I can do it. But I don't _want_ to." He clarifies and his hands twitch even more as I look at him.

"Oh." Realization falls upon me like a ton of bricks and I feel sick again. Am I to think that he'll keep me as his pet? Disgusting.

"No, you don't understand." He shakes his head and I blink.

I don't? Don't tell me that he can read my thoughts too. That'd be…disturbing and creepy.

"Your…taste is so different to me. I don't have to kill you to be sated." He takes a big breath and when his eyes turn to me I can see them misting over with awe, "I've never felt anything like it." He takes a step closer and I flinch back because I do not understand.

"I should better explain." He murmurs with embarrassment and I swallow hard.

"Probably." I whisper, "But I have a question first. Did you kill that man that was brought here? The one she threw in my cell. You know what I am talking about?"

"I do. I have not taken anyone's blood. No matter how she insists. I cannot." He shakes his head and I am puzzled.

"I don't get it." I say and he licks his lips.

"Unbeknownst to her…she has done something that she cannot reverse." He starts carefully, "She's been giving me your blood, small amounts, mind you, for weeks now."

My eyes widen minutely, "Yes." My hand flies to my wrist automatically and I rub the scars there.

"By feeding me your blood she has created a link." He continues and all I can do is stare at him uncomprehendingly,

"I'm sorry?"

"My body has gotten used to your blood and for some odd reason I cannot feed from another one. I _can_ but the taste is not…satisfying. On the contrary. It is revolting." He concludes as he averts his eyes.

I blink rapidly and as I realize what he's saying I feel dizzy. I lean back against the wall and shut my eyes.

"Blood sharing is…rather intimate for vampires. Thus my reluctance to drain you. I cannot bear the thought." He tells me and I open my eyes.

"Does that mean that you're connected on an emotional level with me?" I ask because he is not making sense. I haven't heard of such a thing before but then again, I'd never met a vampire in person. Hell, I didn't even knew that vampires existed!

"Yes."

My eyes look at him with shock. _Hold it._ What does that mean?

"If the blood is given willingly it creates a bond that if completed…" he trails off and I cock an eyebrow.

"What?" I ask because I might as well hear it all.

"If completed it ties the vampire and the mortal for life. The vampire thinks the mortal as his mate and does anything to protect her or him." He murmurs and looks away.

Mate? For life? _Jesus._

"How is the bond completed?" I ask curiously and with bated breath.

His eyes widen and he sputters for a few moments before he closes his eyes with resignation.

"In the most natural way. Intercourse." He says and my cheeks flush with color.

"Oh." I shriek and all my pain is forgotten when I realize what the crazy witch has just done.

"It is not something that occurs often." He speaks up with wide eyes, "Because what mortal would willingly give their blood to a vampire? But it would pose a solution for the vampire's thirst." He pauses and then licks his lips, "Did you by any means give your blood willingly?" he asks and I freeze.

Willingly? If you call not fighting much while she cut me up to collect it willing then yes. Oh dear Lord! I did not fight because it became tiresome and well, it hurt less if I just did as she asked. This is a dream. I blink and pinch my arm hard. I startle and my heart sinks to my stomach when I realize that it is not a dream but reality.

"I feared so." He whispers once he notices my expression, "I did excessive research centuries back about finding a solution for my thirst." He says as he slides down the wall and sits down, "I first found this out in the history of the strigoi."

When he sees my confused expression he shakes his head, "It means poltergeist in Romanian. Many of the folklore tales are correct but not easy to prove." He explains and I continue to stare at him, "But it was impossible to find someone who would willingly link themselves to me. People's fear does not help either." He murmurs and I take a deep breath.

"So you mean, that she does not know what she has done?" I ask and he looks up at me.

"I believe that she has not yet fully understood our connection, no. But she suspects if her trying to entice me with your scent is indication enough." He replies and I shake my head roughly.

"She's crazy." I blurt out and he looks up at me with determination.

"Most definitely." He nods his head and it is then that I realize that for the first time in his presence I am not afraid.

I gulp and I dare to ask another question, "You have bitten me…Why am I not a vampire?" I ask and amusement tints his face and eyes for the first time.

"Because I did not want you to be one. The mortal must have vampire venom in their system and they need to be dead for them to become an immortal. It's not as easy as it might seem." He explains and I am a bit relieved.

I hug the coat tighter around me and I realize that I have not thanked him for it.

"Thank you. For the coat." I explain when he looks at me with surprise, "And for removing the glass from my leg." I add as an afterthought.

"You're most welcome. And yes, that. How did that happen?" he asks as he eyes my bloodied ankle.

I shift because he would surely laugh at me, "I tried to escape. I attacked Angelique with glass and she…retaliated." I mumble and when I look up I can see that he is gazing at me peculiarly.

"Good heavens. Where is the clumsy cake young woman?" he asks and I shrug.

"Muffin, not cake." I correct, "And I am still clumsy. I did not succeed." I object and he nods.

"Indeed. I'd advise you not anger her. Last time I did she thrust a silver knife on my arm." He rubs his arm in remembrance and I wince.

"Silver hurts you?" I ask as I eye the door, fearful that she'll come bursting through that door any time now.

"Yes. Silver, sunlight… Iron can be used to trap me as well." He pulls his hand away from his dirty shirt sleeve.

"Iron?"

"Chains. The only thing that can keep me in. The walls and door are constructed out of iron as well." he mutters.

"Where are we?" I ask as I shiver.

He looks around, "Deep in the earth, I think. I am not sure."

"Then how is sunlight-…  
"Witchcraft." He cuts me off with a snarl as he eyes the roof, "Witchcraft most foul." He spits and when I shiver again I realize that I must be getting a fever. I press my bloodied hand against my forehead and feel my skin. It's burning up.

"You have lost so much blood. I have a way to help you. I did not do it in fear-…" he starts but he is cut off when the door clicks open.

My eyes widen and since I cannot get to my feet I press myself against the wall.

Barnabas is up in a flash and he eyes the door with narrowed eyes. The first thing I see is a booted leg and then Angelique is bursting through the door, a grin on her face.

"Morning-…" she pauses when she notices me. The grin falls right off her lips and her sharp gaze flickers to Barnabas.

"Impossible." She mutters as her eyes keep moving from me to him and back again, "What have you done?" she asks him and he cocks an eyebrow.

"Nothing." He almost smirks at her shocked expression but then her hateful gaze shifts to me.

She advances on me and my eyes widen in alarm. Oh, God not again. I can't take much more dragging about.

"You kept her." She murmurs, "Like a little pet. Why?" she asks him as she looks at him.

He remains silent but I can see the sneer on his lips. He is mocking her.

Oh, no.

With a wave of her hand cold fingers close around my throat and I am lifted up, up against the wall. My legs are not touching the ground and I gasp for breath.

"Answer me." She hisses and he takes a step closer.

"Release her and I shall." He counters and she smirks.

"You're not in position to bargain with me, my love." She tells him and then my hands, my hurt hands, are forced up and against the wall. I cry out because the incisions on my hands hurt and because I can feel my throat closing up from the force of her invisible hold.

But then happens something that I am not expecting. There is a flash of motion and a moment later he is pouncing on her. I groan because his attack causes her grip on the magic to falter and I am dropped to the ground with a start. My leg complains as I fall on it but I have no time to think on that because then he's pushing her away, away against the wall, and then he is in front of me in a crouching position. My eyes widen as he growls at her in fierce warning and from my place I can see his profile. His teeth are bared and the skin of his cheek is scarred with burned flesh. I eye the light and when my gaze falls on him again I remember his words.

He…he is protecting me. Me. Or more precisely he is protecting my blood. I am torn between gratefulness and depredation.

Angelique is flying towards us a moment later and she comes to stand in front of him, her eyes wide.

"Impossible." She breathes, "What in hell are you doing, Barnabas? You…" her gaze finds me and I swallow thickly as she eyes me with shock, "She's just a human." She grounds out and my eyes fall on him.

He cocks his head to the side, still crouching in front of me like a wolf protecting his pack, and he snarls at her, sharp teeth and fangs still bared.

"_My_ human." He replies and his voice is no longer smooth. It is rough and deep and barely human.

Angelique blinks in shock and then shakes her head, "Very well." She mutters as she eyes me and then looks at him with a smirk, "Let's see if you can keep her alive. Do you smell that?" she inhales deeply and I can see that he's trying not to do that. Even I can smell my blood that has soaked my jeans. I swallow hard against the bitter taste that bubbles in my mouth and I avert my eyes from her mocking stare.

"I could help her with her predicament but I won't. I'd do it if you begged me." She whispers as she leans forward to touch his burned cheek but he flinches from her touch, "I could stop her from bleeding."

"Then do it." He snarls and she smiles.

'No, like that I won't. See you tomorrow." She winks and then she's out of the room. The click of the lock is ringing in my ears and I gasp for breath because I am terrified. Terrified of her _and_ of him; of his protection because it means that not only he wants my blood, it also means that he won't let me go either. Is it the same for me? Vampires are linked to humans because of their blood but can humans be drawn to vampires because of the fact that they are providing the blood? I am not sure but as he turns to look at me, still on his hands and knees, I fear that I am already linked to him. Because I already feel sympathy for him.

His eyes are boring into my skin and I gulp. His fangs have disappeared but as he breathes quickly in and out I can see how his Adam's apple keeps bobbing. He's fighting the smell.

Something he said earlier comes to me and I open my mouth to speak. The first time I try I falter and I try again.

"Thanks." I breathe and a soft growl leaves his lips as he eyes me with shock, as he cannot believe what he just did and what I just said.

"You said that can help me before. With my ankle-…"

"And your hands, yes." He says in a low voice and I realize that unless he's willing to get burned again he has to stay to my side of the cell. Awesome.

"How?" I ask because I'd do anything to stop the pain on my body.

His eyes narrow, as if he's surprised and then he speaks again, leaning a bit forward as he does so, "My saliva can heal you. If you want to." He murmurs and my eyes widen. Vampires can heal wounds? Whoa. With their…Ew.

"Like an animal." I murmur and he winces as if the words wounded him.

"Or a monster. Either one." He mutters as he looks away from me. I can see his hands clawing at the ground and I am surprised when I see him carving it with his fingers. He's freakishly strong.

_Okay. Decide, Jane. Now. And say something about the monster bit because you're putting your welfare in his hands._

"If you were one you wouldn't suggest to heal me." I say quietly and he turns to me.

He eyes me for a few seconds, "Or perhaps I am just selfish." he murmurs and I gulp as he approaches slowly, like a cat, "Perhaps I don't want to be tempted." He cocks his head to the side but I don't shuffle backwards.

"I don't think that's the only reason." I say and he looks startled. He looks at me as if I am something peculiar. For better words, he's looking at me as if he sees me for the first time.

"Perhaps." He agrees and then I am speaking again.

"Will it anger her if she finds out you did this for me?" I ask and he's momentarily confused but then he nods.

"Very. She's abnormally jealous." He whispers and I nod.

"Then let's do it." I say and a small smirk lightens his face before he chuckles.

He crawls closer and reaches out to take my hand. I hesitate but what worse can happen? He says he cannot kill me. I flex it once and then I reach out, laying my hand in his cold palm. I shiver as he closes his fingers around mine. He pulls me closer and inspects my hand with his unfathomable midnight eyes before he slowly brings my hand up to his mouth. At the first touch of his lips I flinch but then he is grasping my wrist tightly, his thumb brushing over my scarred skin and then I can feel something cold and wet on the wounds of my hand. A small odd noise leaves the back of his throat as his tongue touches my bloodied skin and I watch with wide eyes as he nurses my had to his mouth. I shudder but not from disgust; not really. The feeling is wet and cold but then the sting disappears and my skin no longer prickles from the cuts Angelique forced onto it. I inhale deeply and when I move my eyes from my hand and his mouth I can see that he has his eyes on my face, watching for my response. His breath is cold on my skin as he exhales and when he pulls his mouth away and eyes my now healed hand he smiles. He lets go of my hand and reaches for the other. I let him do so in silence.

The moment he reaches for my ankle I am shaking and I can see that that's the most difficult part for him. I squeeze my eyes shut as he tends to my leg and when he's done and the throbbing in my ankle is minimal I pull it from his grip. He startles but does not object. He merely crouches back and looks at me studiously. I don't know what it is but I cannot keep my eyes open. And so, a moment later I am asleep with his coat in my hands.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_The room I am in is grand. An enormous chandelier is hanging above me and Christmas decorations are lighting up the room. Landscapes are painted on the walls and the grand fireplace is glimmering with fire. I smile because the place is beautiful and because it smells heavenly with the scents of muffins, lilacs and vanilla prominent in the air around me. I take a deep breath and close my eyes. The air is warm and comfortable and as I move forward I can feel the heat of the fire licking up my back. My eyes snap open when I realize that I am dressed in a long white and dark green dress that gathers at the waist and falls down my legs, covering my feet. I reach up and I can feel my hair, straight and smooth falling down my back and shoulders. It's strange that I can smell and feel in my dreams. But I've always had odd dreams. Since I was a kid I used to dream up magical places, crushing waves and odd landscapes. With the imagination I have and crises of insomnia that I have suffered I ought to be a writer but I never had a great way of expressing myself on paper._

_I shake my head and look around me. I realize with a start that I am no longer alone. A young girl no older than seventeen is swaying with the music and she laughs as the man dancing with her twirls her around and then dips her low._

"_That's so old fashioned." She snorts when he puts her back right to her feet and bows at her._

"_My worse trait, my dear." He says and I stop walking because the girl moves out of the way and I can finally see who the man is. Barnabas. Again._

_I take a step back because as I am standing right behind the girl I can look straight at him. _

"_But you did not step on my foot. Not what usually happens with boys." She says as she steps away from him, "Merry Christmas." She says and then turns to her left, "Night, Jane." She waves her hand and then she's gone._

_Jane? Is she talking to me? But no, she had not looked at me. I turn to my left and I freeze. There I am, sitting at an armchair with the exact same dress. I am engrossed in a book but I look up and wave at the girl as she walks away._

_Not this kind of dream again. My head throbs and I wonder if you can feel pain in dreams but as I recall the waves that had almost drowned me the last time I know that you can._

_I focus my attention on Barnabas. This time he's wearing a white shirt, a black vest, black pants and a velvet crimson overcoat that makes him look like the gentlemen of the eighteenth century. He's walking towards the other me with dark eyes and an odd expression on his face. He comes to stand in front of my twin and offers his hand at her. She eyes it with pursed lips but she does not take it._

"_No."_

"_I want to dance with you." His tone is resolute but polite and warm. There's a hint of reluctance to accept her answer too._

"_The music's over." She says and I drift closer, watching them curiously._

"_We can imagine music." He says and then he swiftly takes hold of her hand. Her book is knocked over and she eyes him wit fury before she pushes him back. He reaches out to touch her again but her words freeze him._

"_How long have you been trying to make complete the blood link?" she asks with force and he falters._

"_Make you?"_

"_Yes. Compel me or whatever."_

"_I have used no such methods on you. I cannot." He says with narrowed eyes and I gasp._

_The blood bond. The one he talked to me about earlier. The facts confuse me. Is all this true or is this just my imagination playing tricks on me? What am I seeing? _

_I shake my head to clear it and refocus on them._

"_Cannot?" my other me asks._

"_I cannot deceive you. Everything you feel is natural."_

"_How can it be natural when there's already a link between us? My blood. That's all there is."_

"_No. It does not work that way. The mortal needs to be willing to feel what the bond commands. He or she must want it, crave it. You know that." He murmurs and she backs away towards the wall._

"_I don't know it. This is totally foreign to me! Why do you even want to _mate_ with me? I am not Victoria." She shakes her head and there is that name again. Victoria._

_God, I am so confused. I want to get out. Now._

"_No. This has nothing to do with Victoria. The bond chooses for us. Not the other way around." He whispers as he backs my shaking twin against the wall, "Just like the heart chooses for the human." He says and she shakes her head. He places his hands against the wall on either side of her head and leans closer to her face._

"_You know we must complete the bond, Jane. You and I. There is no way out of it. Your dreams, your visions have all led to this. Don't fear me. I only wish to protect you. Forever." He whispers hoarsely and I watch with wide eyes as his arms coil around her form, my form, and he lifts her up towards him. His mouth closes over hers and there is a gasp from me and a groan from him and my twin's hands reach for his neck as he presses her hard against the wall, her legs tight around his slim waist. _

_I walk backwards because I am too shocked to do anything else and I yelp in fright because even though I cannot feel him like the last time, I can see him as clear as day. And I can see my other self as well. I can see her as she responds albeit a bit timidly and then there is a loud thud as he slams his hand hard against the wall beside her head and groans into the kiss. A crack appears on the painted wall and my eyes widen. I have to wake up. Now._

_I take a deep breath and look at my bare arm. I reach up to my right forearm and I pinch myself; hard. I cry out and then I am falling backwards towards the hearth and right into the fire. The flames disappear and then I am falling, falling deep down into the darkness._

"_God!" I exclaim and then I am thrust into something hard._

My eyes open and I sit up, gasping for breath, my gaze wild and unsettled. My eyes roam the cell and I can see Barnabas, not the one of my dream but the real one, looking at me with wide eyes. He is in a position that troubles me just as the dream that I just saw. He has one hand against the wall and he looks as if he's ready to leap to my rescue.

I gulp and rub my temples. A million thoughts are running through my head but I don't dare speak. What can I say? Hey, Mr. Collins I m seeing odd, and now sensual, dreams about you? Ridiculous.

"Is something wrong?" his husky voice cuts through my musings and I look up. There is a little light so it's dark enough for me to hide my face.

"No. Nothing." I murmur and he slowly settles down again. The pain on my ankle is almost gone and my hands are fine. The only thing that I can still feel is his mouth and tongue on my skin. I hug his coat more tightly around me and lean back against the wall.

I shut my eyes again and pray for the dream to go away from my head because if these visions continue I will surely go mad. And no one, not even him, can save me from insanity.

**End of chapter 5**

**Author's note: Thank you for reading. Now, the information about the blood bond between vampires and humans is popular in folklore but I made up a few facts to fit my story. The strigoi are actual Romanian mythological creatures/vampires but the fact about the willing blood sharing is my own imagination. So, don't look for facts about that. By the way, searching about vampires and poltergeists is so much fun! I am hooked. Ahem. :p**

**So, if you liked it and want more please review and tell me your thoughts. They are what keep me writing….**_**more**_**. I already love sharing this with you anyway. I hope this chapter explained a bit about Barnabas' reaction to Jane's blood. So, feedback pretty please! :D**

**Xxx Lina :o)**


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N: Welcome back! A very heartfelt thank you to the people who took time to review: Balder Rask, , nuckythompson, MissMisc3, Makrciana, 88dragon06, ForeverACharmedOne, CharlieCats, dionne dance, Jandra1969, smilin steph, XantheXV and TinkerbellxO. Thank you for the support!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Chapter 6**

'_**Let us all be brave enough to die the death of a martyr, but let no one lust for martyrdom.'**_

_**~Mahatma Gandhi**_

Silence. I can't bear the bloody silence. Even my own thoughts have decided to be quiet in this dark place. My hands are so cold and even the extra layer of his coat cannot keep me warm anymore. The sunlight that used to fall into our mutual prison has stopped visiting us. She planned it so of course, I am sure of it. I don't know what she thought she'd succeed with this. Him killing me? Wounding me? Not happening because he hasn't even come close to me for the last three days. I am not even sure he's breathing in order not to inhale my scent. And I cannot see him in this awful darkness. But I do hear him shuffling about and sometimes I can hear him murmuring to himself. Like a crazy person.

I scoff and roll my eyes. As if I am not insane with the dreams I am seeing. Waking up in this darkness is difficult. Difficult because I can no longer tell reality from dreams anymore. I have not told him anything about my odd visions. What would be the point? I'd make him even more fidgety around me and he'd think I am mad. Perhaps I am. But then again, mad people don't know they're mad.

I groan and shake my head. I need to stop thinking about that. If only he could just talk to me.

My thoughts are interrupted by my growling stomach and I blush. I shouldn't be embarrassed because I am hungry. It's logical given the sparse food I am getting lately. I guess we are the same in that department; me and him.

I take a deep breath and the damp scent of soil makes my nostrils burn. I slowly unfold my legs and stand up. I need to move or I won't get warm. I start walking around in the darkness, my hands groping along the wall and I can hear a sharp intake of breath close to me. My eyes widen. So he hasn't been standing that far away after all. I gulp but I don't move back. I need the interaction.

"Mr. Collins?" I whisper and I don't know why I whisper. We are alone.

I hear an audible gulp and then his voice, "Please, call me Barnabas. If you want." His voice is hoarse and I blink.

"Barnabas. Yes, given the circumstances the formalities are useless, yes?" I reply and he doesn't reply.

"Where are you?" I ask suddenly because I cannot hear him.

"Here. But it's better if you stepped back." He replies and I can hear the noise as his back collides with the wall.

I frown, "You're thirsty." I deadpan and he inhales deeply before he murmurs a reply.

"Of course. And you're hungry." He remarks as my stomach growls again. I flush even more.

"Yes…It's cold in here…" I murmur as I squint in the darkness, trying to make out his form but I can't.

"I wouldn't know." Is his only reply and I can hear the disgust in it.

I take a deep breath, "You mind walking with me?" I ask and there is dead silence until he talks again.

"Walking?"

"Yes, I need to warm up." I nod but of course he can't see it…Or can he?

"Can you see in the darkness?" I ask with wide eyes because I feel self conscious suddenly.

"I am afraid I can. Not clearly but my sight is…abnormally good." He replies and I take a step forward, I hear him moving again and I stop, suddenly tired. I groan and slide down the wall again; in his side or mine, I don't care.

"Ms. Walden?" he asks and I don't raise my head.

"It's Jane." I murmur and he hesitates.

"Jane."

I frown at the way he says my name. It is like he's tasting it on his tongue and I flush.

I try to think of a conversation but nothing comes up. I have questions but at the same time I don't want to open the mating subject. Or do I? Maybe I'll be able to make sense of my dreams…and forget my hunger for a while.

"Tell me more about the bond?" I make it a question and when he doesn't reply immediately I sigh.

"What do you want to know?" he says at last and I can hear him shuffling about right across from me.

"Is it…Is it like magic?" I ask and he pauses, obviously confused, "I mean, can it happen with anyone?" I explain and he takes his time in replying.

"No. Not with anyone…The mortal and the vampire have to be compatible." He says at last.

"Compatible?" I frown with confusion.

"Indeed. The vampire must desire the human's blood. He must crave it or the bond would be…pointless." He explains and he sounds a bit more at ease.

"Oh…Because then their thirst would not be satisfied and they would end up killing people." I nod.

"Exactly. The point is to stop the wild bloodlust." His voice is a bit clearer. That means he is distracted from his thirst. I smile a bit.

But then a thought comes to me, "But not all vampires think that way. Some relish in their animalistic ways, don't they? They enjoy killing people." My eyes widen.

His response is belated but very quiet, "That is correct."

I tense up. What if he is that kind of vampire? What if he-…

"I do not enjoy murder….Jane." he cuts through my thoughts like a sharp blade and I freeze, "I only killed because I was compelled to; by my nature and by the zero solutions that I had. I am not going to kill you. I'd rather drain myself from every pathetic fragment of life that I have than hurt you." His voice is quiet and my heart skips a bit because the words are spoken with such caring that I shudder.

"Because of the bond." I counter.

"Perhaps." His answer is cryptic and I blink in shock.

"Perhaps?" I echo and there is a moment of silence. My eyes widen, "The bond creates the feelings." I say at last with realization.

"Yes." His voice is resigned.

"What kind…of feelings?" I venture with bated breath.

"Various ones." Is his answer and then he continues, "Sympathy at first." He starts hesitantly, "Then the protective instincts come."

I strain my ears to listen to him because as he continues his voice gets quieter.

"Then those develop into possessiveness." He clears his throat at that and stops but I am curious for more.

"And then?" I ask softly because I need to know what my last dream meant.

"Then…lust."

"For the human's blood."

"No. I mean, yes! I…" he groans low in his throat and I am fearful that I have angered him but then his voice is smooth again, "Not only for the blood." He replies and my eyes widen and a fierce blush spreads from my neck to my cheeks.

"Oh."

"The vampire is compelled to feel for the human. Because the human is willing to sate his thirst. The humans sacrifice themselves for the vampires and so the emotions develop rapidly."

I rub my hands together because I am finally a little bit warm. I cannot imagine someone feeling like that for me. It's almost surreal. I was ignored in high school, even in kindergarten and even though the people around me thought me cute when I was little. I had minimal number of friends and as I grew up my tastes and interests were not those of my peers. So, I was left out.

What shocks me is that I am not freaked out about all this. I am actually pretty composed. But will it be the same once we're out of here? If we ever get out of here. I have dreams of the future, yes. But what if those dreams were merely illusions? Things my mind made up because I am locked in here?

A sudden idea comes to me.

"In what stage are your emotions?" I ask with alarm but he replies immediately.

"I'd rather not say." And then he swallows hard and I am reminded that he's not a normal man. He's a vampire with high proclivity for my blood. I gulp.

"Why is the light gone?" I ask because I need, _God_, I need to change the subject.

"Because she thinks that if the light is not here to guard you, I will drain you. Kill you." He replies in a low voice and I nod.

"I see." I am suddenly cold again and I bury my face into the collar of his thick coat, trying to get warm again but no matter how hard I try I cannot.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

My eyes snap open with a start as there is a loud bang against the door. The fog of sleep disappears and I am suddenly alert. My eyes squeeze shut when there is a flash of sudden fluorescent light in the room and I rub my eyes. They are so used to the darkness that it hurts to keep them open.

I don't have to wonder how it is because I hear Barnabas' low growl as the door snaps open.

I blink rapidly and finally raise my eyes to the witch in front of us. Her smug face shatters as soon as she sees us both together inside and alive.

"I see." she murmurs as she steps closer, a file of papers in her hand, "You're alive." She then turns to him, "And you're starving." She smirks and then waves her hand towards me. A plate appears and a bottle of water.

"Keep her, I don't care." She says flippantly as she walks towards me. She leans down and grasps my chin between her cold fingers, tilting my face up so she can look into my eyes.

"You're strong. Well, you were bound to have at least one redeeming quality." She eyes me curiously and I try to pull my face away from her hold but she holds me fast, "I can see that he hasn't stopped feeding from you." She remarks and my eyes widen in surprise.

_What?_ Yes, he has stopped. I reach up to finger my neck but she laughs.

"You surely have short memory." She snickers as she grabs my wrist. True enough, there are two small bite marks there and they look fresh. A wave of nausea overwhelms me because I thought that he wouldn't do that without my consent. She releases my hand and when she turns away to walk over to him my eyes, big and wounded turn to eye him. His face is pained and he gives a subtle shake of his head before he focuses on her.

What does that mean? Did he feed from me while I was asleep? Can he even do that? Anger flares up inside of me and I push my hand between my knees, not wanting to see it because it makes me sick. I had started trusting him, believing his every word while…

"I have come to make an arrangement." She tells him smoothly as she throws a file in his lap, "Your family has called."

His eyes widen, "What did you do?" he accuses and she blinks innocently.

"Nothing. They came on their own. They care for you. So, I decided to take up on their little offer.' She says as she kneels down in front of him. He tenses up and eyes her with such sheer fury that I am stunned.

"Offer?"

"Apparently that creature you eye with such devotion," his eyes turn to me for a brief moment and I stiffen because she doesn't mean me, I can sense it, "misses you. So, they have decided to give me the family's business in exchange of your safe return." She smiles at him and reaches out to brush a lock of his hair away. He slaps her hand away and her expression darkens.

"I'd rather die than hand you the company. Surely, Elizabeth knows that. She'd never make that offer."

"What are you insinuating?" she asks quietly.

"That you're lying." His hand then throws the file on her lap, "I decline. There is no deal. The company is out of the question. I have to sign as well so you better kill me instead. Although, I think you cannot, can you?" he leans closer but she holds her ground while I stiffen, "Because you might have made me what I am but you cannot reverse it. I am stronger than you. These walls are the only things that weaken me." His expression is smug and there is such confidence in him that I momentarily forget what he did to me.

Angelique swallows hard and then smiles, "Of course you'd say no at first. But I shall leave this here with you. Study it. I think it's a good compromise. And you'll be out of here to do whatever you want."

"Liar. You won't ever let us go." He hisses and she throws her head back and laughs.

"_Us_? Just you, my darling. She has seen too much. So, here." She pulls out a small bottle with thick red liquid in it.

_Blood_. I want to gag and I cover my mouth with my hand as he eyes it and then slowly takes it. I can see that his hand is shaking as he holds the bottle up to his eyes.

"Start getting used to it because sooner or later she'll be gone. I am just helping you, really." she shrugs and uncorks the vial for him, "So, drink it." She says coolly and I can see that he's trying hard not to inhale. I see his Adam's apple bobbing and I know he's fighting the urge to gag. If what he told me is true, the smell, and let alone the taste, should be revolting.

So, she still is not aware of our…connection. Oh God, if she doesn't know she'll kill me. And if she knew, she'd surely get so envious that again she'd kill me in a heartbeat.

I focus my attention back to him and I watch with horror as he tips the bottle back and brings it to his lips. His eyes lock with mine as he does so and mine widen when he swallows it in one go.

Angelique grins with satisfaction and then stands up. She thinks that she can make him drink whatever blood she wants if she just feeds it into his system slowly.

Jesus, how wrong she is.

"Eat. I must admit your presence is rather amusing. Until later." She waves her fingers at me and then she is gone.

A sharp intake of breath and a pained moan makes me look back at Barnabas. His face is even paler than usual and his eyes are squeezed shut. A low growl bubbles up in his throat and then he turns away from me to promptly empty the contents of his stomach onto the ground by the wall.

My eyes go to the blood he had just consumed and as he collapses on the floor next to his vomit I realize that he may have bitten me but he has not drunk from me. He's too weak and I suddenly feel guilty and foolish. Why did he bite me then?

I watch with wide eyes as he leans back against the wall and closes his eyes. The bright fluorescent light goes off a moment later and what we both know is darkness.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_It's night and the moon is high on the sky. I am standing in front of a large open space and as I stare right ahead I can see a small construction site in front of me. Tall pine trees are standing tall behind me and I shiver as a chilly breeze blows my hair in front of my face. The wind is spicy with the air of the ocean; a mixture of salt and honeysuckle prickles my nostrils and I inhale deeply. As the wind hits my face I can sense that it is cold and moistened. I reach up and I realize with a start that there are tears running down my cheeks._

_I inhale sharply and step back. Why am I crying? I do not remember…Or rather, I don't know why I am crying. I feel fine, albeit a bit cold. I look down and I see that I am in a knee length skirt and a pale blue shirt is leaving my arms bare to the wind. I shiver and as my arms brush my shirt I can feel how silky soft it is._

_Silk? Since when do I wear silk? Oh, but this is a dream so I can wear anything. Right?_

_I shake my head and focus on the half finished building in front of me. It's not too big but not too small either. A cobble stoned path leads up to the front door and as the moonlight falls on it I can see that it is painted in a light crimson color. There are no windows or even a door and I realize that it is a work in progress._

_I turn away from the construction and look out at the woods that expand in front of my eyes. The smell of pine comes to add a different scent in the air but something feels off. My eyes scan the darkness, looking for him because he's always in my dreams but he's nowhere to be seen._

_The wind picks up and my hair falls in front of my eyes just as a noise behind me makes my hair stand up on end. I swiftly turn around and my high heels-don't ask me where I got these- make me stagger. I push my hair away from my eyes and squint, trying to see what that noise was._

_I see nothing. Still, the feeling that I am being watched doesn't leave me and as I slowly turn in a circle I hear a small chuckle. I tense up because the sound is not familiar._

_I look to my right and I see a figure coming out of the woods. It's a man and he is so tall and muscular that I start to shake from fear. __**Who**__ is he?_

"_Jane. We meet again." He murmurs my name and as he approaches I can see that his eyes are red; so red that it's like they are bleeding._

_I swallow hard, my throat suddenly dry as I try to wet it with saliva but then he's coming closer and his lips are parted. His eyes are wild with thirst and they are shining with an emotion that is easy to recognize; hate._

_I part my lips to speak but like always I cannot; my throat is clogged and my heart is beating so wildly that I think he can hear it._

"_I've waited too long for this. Draining you will be the completion of this circle. The one she opened and then I can avenge her. Finally." His voice is hoarse and as he comes closer I continue to stumble back, the grass cold and wet against my feet._

_**Her**__? Who is her? And who would want to kill me? For what? What did I do? And where is he? Where is Barnabas? He's always here._

_I can feel sweat on my skin even if it's so cold. My legs feel weak and I realize that as I lock eyes with him I cannot move. My eyes widen as he holds my gaze and I can see his black pupils dilating. What is he doing? Is he compelling me? Is that why I cannot move?_

_My God, I can't move and he's coming closer. He's so close that I can feel the smell of blood and death on him. It's revolting even though his features are not. He's handsome but his fury and hate make him look fearsome. Dread and terror twist my stomach into a million little knots and I try with all my might to dislodge my legs from the ground in order to run but I cannot. My mind feels empty suddenly and I realize that he's using his eyes to make me do what he pleases. He doesn't want me to fight; he doesn't want me to scream. But why? _

_I blink hard and the fog starts to clear up. He seems surprised and I do it again. I am shocked when my legs feel free and I take a step back. He looks bewildered but then his eyes darken and he snarls. His hand tries to grab my arm but my hand shots out and my fist punches him straight in the jaw. I gasp because my knuckles hurt and besides angry he doesn't seem hurt at all. I stagger back as he pounces on me and we end up on the ground. The wind is knocked out of me and I groan but then his hand is in my hair, his fingers twisting around the strands and then his lips are on mine, rough and demanding and then his sharp teeth are biting my lip, tearing it and I cry out but it is a soundless sound._

_He pulls back and my eyes widen at the blood on his lips. It makes him look feral. I arch my back and try to slide away from him but his grip on my hair tightens and as it does so I am certain that he has pulled off whole strands of my hair. My eyes squeeze shut and I start to hyperventilate. _

"_That's right. Fight. I'll only enjoy it more." He sneers down at me and then he tilts his head back and he opens his mouth. Long sharp fangs appear and then suddenly I am screaming. I don't know if I can be heard but I can hear my scream in my head and it's even more terrifying. His eyes glimmer maliciously and then he's leaning forward, closer and closer. His teeth scratch at my neck and I cry out again but then something knocks us both, rattles us, and my head is released. I open my eyes wide and then I see him. His hands are around the other vampire's shoulders and his fangs are bared in a fierce snarl. _

_My attacker staggers and looks perplexed as Barnabas grabs fistfuls of his jacket and hauls him up. He is sent at least four feet away from us but recovers quickly._

_Barnabas spares me a glance and then he is up to his feet. The other vampire approaches and Barnabas growls before he leaps up and pounces on him. _

_I sit up and watch with wide eyes as he sinks his teeth in my attacker's neck and I gasp when he throws him away from him with a mighty push. The red eyed man's back hits a pine tree and he rattles the whole thing while Barnabas wipes his mouth with his hand and starts walking towards him._

"_Anything to say?" he asks hoarsely as he starts circling the other man like a lion._

"_Shut up!" my attacker screams at him and then he's up on his feet and flying towards Barnabas with extreme speed._

_I whimper as Barnabas is knocked off his feet but then his hands are twisting around the man's neck and they start to squeeze. The vampire on top of him gasps and gurgles and his hold on Barnabas starts to loosen up. Grabbing at his obvious chance, Barnabas rolls them over until he's on top and then he starts dragging the other vampire up, up until he has him tucked under his arm. His forearm is pressing hard against my attacker's throat and then his fangs are sinking into his neck again. In one mighty pull he rips his head off and I scream. The impact of the scene and my fear throws me back on my back and I stare as Barnabas slowly lets go of the man's body. It falls onto the grass with a dull thud before it bursts into flames and all that is left is ash._

_My breathing is hard and labored and my gaze falls on my rescuer who is currently sitting back on his knees with blood staining his mouth. In the moonlight he looks like an avenging angel and I am stunned. _

_But then he moves and brings out a handkerchief to wipe at his mouth, his gaze not meeting mine. He throws the handkerchief away and then finally he looks at me. His face is contrite and his eyes burning with a million emotions._

_Suddenly I am on my feet and a moment later I am in his arms. He groans as my body collides with his but then his arms are around me and in my hair. My heart starts to calm down but then his body under my hands and against my body is starting to dissolve. My eyes widen in shock because I know what's happening; I am waking up. I am waking up before I have the time to find out who the man that attacked me was._

_I grip onto his jacket more tightly but then I am falling down and down and right through the earth. _

My eyes snap open and I sit up in the darkness. I swallow hard and blink rapidly, trying to figure out the meaning of this dream. As I start to calm down and as the sweat on my brow starts to cool off I know what it means. That I should trust him or at least not judge him.

Before I know what exactly I am doing, I am standing up and groping my way towards Barnabas. He hears me and shifts, probably trying to pull away.

"Jane?" his voice is confused but as my hand finds his strong forearm he doesn't pull back. I kneel down next to him and my fingers tighten on his arm but he is not moving it away. I can hear him inhaling deeply and that makes my decision for me. I reach up and find his face. He gasps and tries to pull back but I hush him. He turns still under my command. I pull my sleeve up and bring it up towards the direction of his nose where I am sure he can smell it. He stiffens and a low growl escapes his throat.

"What are you doing?" he chokes out and I take a deep breath.

"If we want to get out you have to be strong. So, just do it." I whisper and I wonder if I can trust him enough not to hurt me. But then again, he said he couldn't. I rely on that.

"Do it?" he whispers hoarsely and I nod.

"Yes. I give you permission to drink…Just don't kill me." I add in a small voice and there is a moment of utter silence before he groans and grabs hold of my hand. I gasp and it must have alerted him of the force of his grip because he loosens his hold until he's cradling my hand in his cold one. His lips brush my wrist and when he locates the bite marks he created, he wraps his mouth around them and starts to suck. I gasp and stiffen but I know that if we have a chance to escape, that chance is him. He's the only on who can kill the witch and so far he's been weak.

I try to relax and when he brings my hand closer to him and nuzzles it with his nose I know that I am safe. He'd never kill me; not even if his life depended on it.

**End of chapter 6**

**Author's note: Thank you for reading. I hope you liked it! Please let me know with a review. It means a lot!**

**Check out my Facebook page for news and info.**

**Until next time, loves!**

**Xxx Lina :o)**


	8. Chapter 7

**A/N: Welcome! A huge thank you to: nuckythompson, MissMisc3, simbasockz, PhyscoticOnna, 88dragon06, Makrciana, signifiedapollo, CharlieCats, TinkerbellxO, dionne dance, XantheXV, Jandra1969 and ElleWillBite. Thank you all for all the encouragement. You're the reason I am writing this.**

**This chapter is dedicated to all **_**five ladies**_** who are sticking with me in this! You know who you are!(P, K, A, D, and B) I hope you got it. ;o)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows. If I did, I'd be living in Collinwood…Darn it!**

* * *

**Chapter 7**

'_**Dreams are today's answers to tomorrow's questions.'**_

_**~Edgar Cayce**_

_A week later…_

My hands are shaking as I hold up the long white robe that I found lying next to me this morning. I lean back against the wall and as I look at the long piece of clothing I frown.

What the hell is this? Why did she give me this? There is a pocket so I slip my hand inside and grope around for something, anything that would give me a clue as to why she decided to give me clean clothes.

My eyes widen when my fingers close around a piece of paper. As I pull it out, I feel Barnabas' eyes on me, but I ignore him because I am too ruffled to speak right now, I drop the dress on my lap and I unfold the small note.

As I read it my heart drops to my stomach.

_Put it on. I think it will fit you since you've decided to play the martyr. It's obvious that you have a hold on him. If you help me with that file I shall make sure you're free soon. Oh and no need to thank me. I am known for my generosity. _

_~A._

I scrunch up the note and throw it away from me in a fit of anger. Who does she think she is? Generosity? Her? I scoff and run a hand through my tangled hair. I am a mess, but I try not to think on that too much. I have greater problems to deal with. First of all my filthiness, then my dreams and the vampire who cannot ever take his eyes off of me and finally my greatest problem at the moment; undressing while he's in here with me.

My face flushes and I look upon the dress. I have to wear it because in all actuality, I stink. I cannot stand the smell of blood anymore. My stomach churns all the time lately. I am not eating enough to replenish all the blood I have lost and all the blood I am freely giving. I am lightheaded all the time and as I touch my cheek I can feel that my skin is burning. I groan inwardly. The last thing I need is a fever…But from what? What caused it? Well the truth is that my neck stings a bit.

My eyes widen. It cannot be an infection, can it? He's always making sure my skin is clean when he's done, but that was for my hand, not my neck. He hasn't gone anywhere near my neck for over a week.

I shake my head, but the movement makes me dizzy.

"What did it say?" I hear his voice from across of me and I look up at him. I eye the ball of paper that is standing between us and the small light that is illuminating the room is enough to detect the worry in his gaze.

"Nothing." I mutter because I never tell him anything. I never mention my dreams or my feelings because I don't think he'd understand the simultaneous feeling of dread and excitement that rushes through me when he's near. It's insane really. And I haven't dreamed for the last two days. But that might be because I haven't had a decent night's sleep lately.

"You look upset." He remarks in his ever so polite tone, "May I read it?" He leans forward and my eyes widen when he tries to reach for the note.

He notices my apprehension like he notices almost everything else.

"You'd rather if I didn't?" He cocks an eyebrow and I swallow hard before I shrug.

"It's okay."

His long fingers curl around the paper and he brings it towards him. He unfolds it and as his eyes move quickly over the lines a snarl appears on his lips and then his eyes are on me, hopeful and accusing all at once. Why is he looking at me that way? It's not as if I can _make_ him sign those papers.

"Would you do it?" he murmurs and I frown.

"Do what?"

"Help her?" he motions towards the note.

I scoff, "Nope. I already know she's going to kill me. Why give her the opportunity to gloat about?" I mutter and his eyes narrow.

"You could, you know."

I look up at him sharply, "I am sorry?"

"You could do it. Make me sign it. If you asked for it I wouldn't be able to refuse." He whispers as he throws the note away and pulls his knees up to his chest.

"Impossible." I murmur as I look at him with wide eyes.

"Not remotely." He shakes his head.

"But…I cannot command you to do anything you don't want to." My voice is incredulous, disbelieving.

He averts his eyes and then looks up at me from beneath his eyelashes, "You could." He insists.

"You're serious." My heart suddenly stops, "I cannot have that much power over you."

"Not yet." He grounds out and his eyes roam my form for a few torturously long seconds before he locks eyes with me again.

"Please, explain." I shake my head and he licks his lips. I look away because I can feel those lips still on my skin. My wrist is still burning from his mouth.

_Jesus, compose yourself!_ My inner voice snaps and I blink.

"If the bond was complete…you could make me do whatever you wanted. I wouldn't be able to refuse you anything. Anything but one." He clears his throat as my cheeks flush.

"What?"

"Kill you. I'd never do that…" he clarifies loudly and I finger the robe between my fingers as I mull over that.

"I could never order you around like a pet. So, helping her is out of the question." I say at last and as I look up I see that his eyes have softened.

"I see. I shall turn around now." He stands abruptly and turns to face the wall and I frown before I quickly realize why he has done that.

I quickly scamper to my feet and shrug out of his coat, my eyes on his back, but I know he won't turn around. I reach for the hem of my shirt and I pull it up and off. I turn it over and reach for the bottle of water by my feet. I uncork it and soak the material before I start cleaning my shoulders and arms. As I reach my neck I hiss quietly and pause. There's something definitely wrong with the marks there but I continue because the soaked cloth and the humidity of the cell make me shiver. I pull my pants off and throw them on the ground before I reach for the robe. I pull it around me and faster the two inner buttons by my side before I tug on the tie around the waist, I make a strong knot and then I look down. The hem reaches my ankles and I am glad that it is not too thin.

I push the wet shirt away with my foot and then I wash my hands with water. I splash my face too and I feel a little better. I put the bottle away and I look at him. His face is slightly turned towards me and I startle for I had not noticed him moving. I clear my throat and sit down again, folding my legs under my bottom.

"I'm done…But you already know that." I mutter and then he slowly turns. If I didn't know any better I'd say that he looks a bit guilty.

"You've been watching." I accuse and his eyes flash up to mine.

"No. But I've been listening." His mouth twists a bit and it is a novelty because he never smiles.

"That's a relief." I murmur and he tilts his head to the side as he sits down again.

"Don't be so sure." He narrows his eyes a bit and I am alert again.

"What does that mean?" I ask and he shrugs almost playfully.

I flush.

"It means that I listen very well."

"You can hear my heartbeat." I blurt out before I can stop myself and he nods.

"And my breathing." I add and again he nods without taking his eyes off of me.

"That means no privacy." I mutter and he pauses, a frown on his face.

"I never thought of that before." He murmurs and I sigh.

"Don't worry about it." I shake my head and hug my knees in hopes that nothing is showing. He has access to enough skin as it is.

"You might want to eat that." He motions towards the sandwich and I turn to look at it with depredation. How can I be sure she hasn't been putting anything in it to make me sick?

"What if it's poisoned?" I ask quietly and in a flash he's next to me. I yelp and jump because I still haven't gotten used to his speed.

I place my hand over my heart and gulp, "Don't do that." I breathe, but he's already reaching for the sandwich.

He brings the plate up to his nose and he takes a big whiff. Like a wolf. I almost chuckle at the comparison. His eyes lock with mine and then he slowly shakes his head.

"It smells fine." He says at last before he hands me the plate back. I take it and he shuffles back until he is sitting next to me.

As I look at him I have to admit that he looks a lot better than he did a few days ago. He had been almost dehydrated, but now the dark circles around his eyes have receded. His cheeks are extremely pale yes, but they are so white now; like granite. His mouth is a dark pink and I know it isn't because of blood stains. He makes sure to clean up. Thus, my diminishing water supplies. His hair is still a wild mess but I can't master up the courage to run my hand through it and tame it down. I don't know if he'd let me.

All in all, it seems like my blood is helping him. On the other hand I look like a mess.

"Thanks." I say at last because I realize a little too late that I've been staring at him like an idiot.

"What are you thinking?" he asks me suddenly and I can see that his eyes are fixated on a lock of my dark hair.

I shift uncomfortably, "Nothing."

"Your heartbeat accelerates when you lie." He says immediately and then closes his eyes, "I'm sorry."

"No, it's…" I trail off and shake my head quickly, "I am not well." I mutter and I lean forward to take the sandwich.

As I am getting ready to take a bite I feel his hand on my shoulder, cold and smooth. What the hell? I freeze because the next thing I know, and _feel_, is his hand combing through the tangles in my hair. My breath hitches and I almost drop the plate from the unexpectedness of the gesture.

"Um," I start and his eyes lock with mine, I don't know what he sees there, but he pulls his hand back as swiftly as he put it there.

He retreats against the wall and swallows thickly, "I apologize." He murmurs and I straighten.

"What for?"

"I took the liberty to…I'm sorry."

His words relieve some of my stress and I laugh softly because he'd never know that the touch was comforting.

"Don't worry about it." I shake my head and as I carry on eating I can feel his gaze on me.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_I land on my feet and I gasp, for the surface under me is swaying precariously. My eyes snap open and I look around me. I freeze. I am standing…on a damn dock! As lower my hands only to realize that they are already lowered. They are not just lowered; they are full, holding a basket. A familiar smell reaches my nostrils and I grimace. I am holding onto a basket…of fish! Good God! Where am I? I take a look around and I see that the dock is surrounded with people. Men and children mostly. There are countless of fishing boats around and the loud voices of the fishermen are ringing in my ears, not leaving me enough space to think. _

_As I look at the people, I realize with a start that they are dressed oddly, with old fashioned clothes. It looks like the Victorian era, but I am not sure. I've never been good at history._

_My mouth goes dry as I look down upon myself. My clothes are similar too. A long, but pretty plain dark blue dress that reaches my toes is hugging my body. A crisply white apron is fastened around my waist, but it is already stained with saltwater and seaweed._

_My eyes widen. Where the hell am I? I still don't know why I am holding onto the basket. I just feel that I have to. I take a look around and then turn in a circle. The sky is slightly overcast, but I just know that it's noon._

_I reach up with one hand and finger my hair. It's is pulled in a low bun at the back of my head, but a few straight strands have escaped and they are falling in front of my eyes. I shake my head and as I turn the wind brushes them back and away from my eyes and cheeks. I squint and try to make out any familiar faces, but I cannot._

_My feet feel wet and I look down with a start. I raise the hem of my heavy skirt and I notice that I am wearing stockings but no shoes. My toes are soaked and as the wind brushes them I shiver. I am wearing no shoes and therefore, someone close to me must be around here. _

_People pass by me and most of them don't notice me but a few of them are smirking and shaking their heads as if my daydreaming is something awfully familiar. As I watch them, I realize that they are workers._

_I flush for some odd reason and then I hear someone whistling. I turn around towards the awfully familiar sound and my eyes widen. In front of me, just a few feet away and in a fishing boat is my father. My very _dead_ father. He's shaking his head and smiling at me and my whole body goes rigid with shock._

"_Jane!" he exclaims as he waves his hand in front of him, as if trying to wake me up from my daze. My throat closes up because it's been so long since I've seen him. His warm brown gaze is fixated on me and there is smile on his lips as he starts walking towards the end of the boat. I take a reflexive step back and I wish to wake up because I think that I am going insane. _

_He frowns as I take another step back and when he steps onto the dock I know that I am stumbling back because my foot collides with a barrel. I gasp as I feel myself falling backwards and I watch as my father's eyes widen as I fall. The basket slips from my hands and I let out a very embarrassing squeal. Hands grab me just under my armpits and I squeeze my eyes shut but the fall never comes. I am left hanging at an odd angle with my back bent backwards, while the stranger's hands hold me inches away from the slippery dock._

_I release a slow breath and then swallow hard. I slowly open my eyes and they do a quick perusal before they glance upwards. Honey brown eyes are looking down at me with worry and the handsome face of Barnabas Collins makes my head reel. My throat goes dry and my limbs melt into hot wax because he looks so different. Rosy from the cold cheeks, light pink lips that are pursed in concern and dark brown hair that is blowing with the breeze._

_The more I stare at him the more the worry ebbs away from his face until his mouth starts twitching with amusement. If I were in my right senses I would have the rationality to blush, but I can't take my eyes away from him. He looks…human, beautiful in a completely natural way whilst I am still my plain self. Pale, clumsy and with the same lifeless straight hair that are is falling across my eyes and make it difficult for me to see properly._

_He is fully grinning at me by now and his eyes are glimmering with playfulness._

"_Why, Miss, it seems like you've dropped right from the heavens above." He says as he pulls me upwards and pushes a strand of hair away from my face. I blink and finally straighten. I feel my cheeks burning with mortification as I smooth down my dress, but he looks still damned amused. And he does not know me. My eyes widen with that knowledge. It's the first time that he doesn't know me in my dreams. Or does he? I cannot tell from the way he's looking at me._

"_Oh, my God! Barnabas! Is she alright?" A soft female voice gasps and my head swivels to the left at that. A blindingly beautiful blonde woman approaches and her features are etched in worry._

_For me?_

"_Jane's fine! She's just clumsy is all." I hear my father's voice and I finally recall that he's here. My head starts spinning because all this is too much._

"_Charmingly so." Barnabas speaks up with a small chuckle as the woman comes and latches onto his arm._

_I swallow hard because his eyes are still on me and there is something in them. Is it recognition or curiosity? Perhaps I look so damn awful with my wet dress and messy bun. He on the other hand looks like he just dropped from a palace. His clothes are from the finest materials and they have intricate designs that accentuate his features._

_The woman next to him is dressed in a lovely green dress that leaves her pale collarbones exposed. She's holding onto an umbrella and she is looking at me studiously as well._

"_Thank you, Mr. Collins." My father says gratefully and I look at him. He's giving me a warning glance and I quickly bow my head._

"_Thank you." I mutter and I realize that I can speak. I try not to show my shock, but when I look up Barnabas is looking at me with a small frown._

"_Shall we go back?" The woman next to him asks bashfully and I blink._

"_Indeed. Josette, wait for me by the horse?" He turns to her and kisses her hand before he lets go of her._

_She smiles and with a nod towards me she walks away._

_I lean down and start picking up the fallen basket and my father turns away to pull something out of the boat. My shock is beyond me when Barnabas leans down next to me. His hand closes around my fingers and I look up with a gasp. His eyes are scanning the area around us before he locks his gaze with mine. His eyes are dark and intense and I feel my heart beating wildly against my chest. Why is he looking at me like that?_

"_I'm sorry I haven't sent word." He murmurs fervently and I watch with shock as he pulls my hand up to his lips. He presses a firm and scorching kiss upon my fingers and I jerk in his hold. His eyes don't leave my face as he slowly, almost reluctantly, pulls his mouth away from my hand. His hold is firm and is bordering on painful but I cannot move. I am too shocked and confused. So, he knows me? We know each other?_

"_Jane, I need to see you. Just tell me when." He whispers as he eyes my father and then busies himself with the basket and fish, pretending he's helping me when in reality he's waiting for an answer. But my mouth is clogged up and I wonder what I should say? What if this is real and not only my dream? What if my answer messes up lives? Oh, God why is he _looking_ at me like that?_

"_Jane, please." He breathes and I blink rapidly._

"_I don't…" I falter and his eyes look pained._

"_Are you cross with me?" He murmurs and then his hand in on my knee that is next to him. I look down upon it as I scan my brain for an answer. _

_Jesus Christ! I am going insane._

"_No." I blurt out and he looks relieved. He pulls his hand away and he panics as he notices my father approaching._

"_Wait for me tonight by the gates. I'll be there, sweetheart." He whispers before he let's go of my hand and stands up._

"_Mr. Wald." He nods at him and in a flash he's gone._

_I am left staring after him as he disappears among the sea of fishermen and then I feel my father's hand on my shoulder. I jump and because I need something to anchor myself I place mine over his before I stand. His hand is warm and slightly calloused and I frown because my father's hands were always soft._

_I turn around and then I am in his arms. His hold on me is strong and tears well up in my eyes. I tighten my own arms around him and then he's laughing._

"_You need to stop staring at Master Collins like that." He murmurs gently and I frown, "He's a betrothed man, my love. And way above us. Remember that." He breathes and then he lets go of me. He steps back and smiles at me, but I barely see it because there are tears blurring my vision. Are all my lives miserable then?_

_He pats my arm and then he passes by me. I am left standing there with wide eyes and a choked sob escapes my throat. I cradle my head and squeeze my eyes shut. Why haven't I woken up yet? I need to wake up._

_I ignore my father's voice asking me to hurry up and I pinch my arm hard. I feel no pain and I panic. What on earth? It has always worked before. I look around for something, anything and it is then that I notice the increasingly large waves. I gulp and take a step closer. The smell of the sea is strong in my nostrils and I inhale deeply before I raise my arms and lean forward._

_I close my eyes tightly shut and then I am falling forward. I hit the waves with a sickening splash and then I can feel water clogging up my air passageways; first my nose and then my mouth. My lungs are compressed painfully and I feel the water weighing me down, down, until I can no longer distinguish my own body from the watery grave around me._

I gasp as I wake up, but I don't open my eyes because I feel an odd sensation up my arm. Something cold is running up and down my arm, the coldness slipping under my robe sleeve. Cold fingers wrap around mine and I exhale with relief because I know who that is. I am finally awake. I swallow against the urge to stiffen because I know that he needs to be grounded as much as I. I lightly squeeze his hand in return and then I hear him shifting, coming closer and then I feel more coldness against my palm. I frown and then I have to open my eyes.

Once they are open they lock with his dark ones and I inhale sharply when I realize that he has put my hand on his cheek so that I am cradling it. I know what he wants. It's been more than a day after all. I swallow hard against the fear, because it's always there and I can't help it.

Nevertheless, I nod and his eyes widen a bit because he's always surprised that I let him do this. Maybe this is proof enough that I should tell him about my odd dreams.

But I have no time for that because he's already sliding his lips towards my wrist. My fingers slide higher up his cheekbone as he shuffles lower and then his teeth are on my skin, pressing with little pressure and then his mouth and tongue are lapping up my blood or my very soul… I am not sure. I shudder and as he sucks he frowns and his fingers tighten around my fingers in a silent question. I groan because it's the first time that I feel so lightheaded while he does this. I place my free hand upon my brow and I jerk when I notice how hot my skin is. Fear causes me to thrash in his hold and with one last sweep of his tongue he's pulling his lips away with wide, fearful eyes.

"Jane?" His voice is hoarse and other times it has caused me to flush, but right now I feel like I am loosing myself into darkness again and I fear it because I don't want anymore of those damn dreams. I gasp for breath, but now he's shifting closer, his cold hand against my feverish cheek and then he is closely inspecting my face. I look at him from beneath heavy eyelids and then he's pushing my hair away from my neck. He tilts my head and I comply like a ragdoll as his fingers brush over the burning bite marks on my neck. I am certain that he has stopped breathing and before my senses leave me all I see is his wide and swimming with panic gaze.

**End of chapter 7**

**Author's note: Thank you for reading. Please comment before you go. It only takes a moment and makes this penniless (and I am saying this literally) happy! Also what did you think of this new dream sequence? Believe it or not I dreamed that! Yep! I am that weird! Lol**

**Anyway, please review!**

**Join me on Facebook for update news, info and much more!**

**Xxx Lina ;o)**


	9. Chapter 8

**A/N: Welcome back! I want to thank: nuckythompson, ForeverACharmedOne, CharlieCats, 88dragon06, MissMisc3, Makrciana, Why Fireflies Flash, BlooperLover, missyclone, dionne dance, signifiedapollo, xxPaige23xx, XantheXV, Jandra1969, guest, PhyscoticOnna, TinkerbellxO and ElleWillBite.**

**Thank you all for your support!**

**On with the chapter now!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Chapter 8**

'_**The truest way to be deceived is to think oneself more knowing than others.'**_

_**~Francois de La Rochefoucauld**_

_A sharp pull at my inner arm causes me to open my eyes._

"_Hurt you? Sorry. I know it gets itchy after a while." A female voice says gently before I feel a pat upon my knee._

_I turn towards the voice and my eyes widen briefly. The woman in front of me is short, slim, with bright red hair that makes her pale skin stand out. She has a pair of glasses perched upon her elegant nose and I am bewildered. She's beautiful._

_She's not looking at me so I look at what she's doing. She's busy securing a…couple of blood bags and I freeze. What the hell?_

"I w_on't take any more for over a month. You should be good." She speaks up and then she turns to look at me with a smile._

"_How are the pills helping, dear? Are you sleeping peacefully?" she asks me and I clear my throat in an attempt to see if I can speak._

"_Yes." I reply simply and offer a small smile. She seems satisfied and she's already turning away to put the bags in a small freezer by the corner. I furrow my brow but then turn my gaze away to inspect the room. It is painted in a glum gray color and it is filled with medical instruments, books and a long settee. I realize that the woman is a doctor and by the look of the reclining chair in the corner I can tell that she's a psychiatrist._

_My body tenses up. Where am I? _

_The room looks like it is located in a basement because the windows don't show anything else than more walls. The glass is thick and almost blurry and I have to wonder how old this place is._

"_Jane. You can sit up now." The woman calls and I blink before I slowly sit up fully on my bottom. I look down on my lap and I can see that I am wearing a dark green knee length skirt and a lighter shirt with short sleeves. I then realize that I am holding onto a piece of cotton which is pressed right against the sting on my inner arm._

_I swallow hard as a wave of dizziness overcomes me and before I have the time to blink the blurry vision away there is a knock upon the door._

"_Come in." the woman calls and then the door is opened. I do not look up because I am still trying to clear my vision but then I hear the voice of the intruder._

"_Good morning, doctor."_

_That's Barnabas' voice. My entire form goes stiff as I listen to his approaching footsteps._

"_Barnabas."_

"_I've brought Jane's juice." He announces and if I wasn't so shocked I'd pay more attention to the smugness in his voice. He brought me juice. Big deal._

"_From the way you're saying it, it sounds like you made it." The doctor snickers._

"_That I did, Julia. Shall we see if I succeeded?" the glass is thrust right under my nose and I have to look up in order to avoid the impact with the cold item.._

_His dark eyes lock with mine and there is a smile playing upon his lips._

"_Jane." He murmurs as he leans forward with the very clear intention to capture my lips with his own. I freeze up and when his lips touch mine I almost gasp. I swiftly turn my head away and I can already feel the fierce blush creeping up my neck and cheeks._

_His cool lips don't stop and press a couple of small kisses upon my cheek and corner of my mouth before he hands me the orange juice._

"_Now drink up." He smiles and with a tuck of my hair behind my ear he turns to face Julia who is looking at him with pursed lips._

"_Is she done?" he asks and I take a sip of the orange juice. It is sweet; too sweet in fact. I almost gag because for some odd reason my stomach doesn't like the sickly sweet taste of the fruit. I place a hand upon my belly and push the glass away from my lips as soon as I feel acid on my tongue. I am shocked when I empty the contents of my stomach upon the ground._

_I hear rapid footsteps and then there are hands upon my arms, cold but gentle, rubbing my skin in slow languid movements._

"_My dear, are you alright?" he asks me and then Julia is in front of me. In a flash her hand in upon my wrist and she's checking my pulse but my stomach turns again and I push them both away. The glass falls upon the ground and shatters into tiny little pieces but I don't care because my vision is blurred and more acid burns my mouth and tongue._

_My throat feels like it's on fire and I gasp for breath as I dry heave and I blink rapidly to clear my vision._

_But even as I try to stay upright I can feel myself tipping forward and then I am falling. I hear commotion from the two people next to me and before I hit the ground I feel hands around my waist ,supporting me. Everything goes black._

Hands are around me; one supporting the back of my head and the other one around my back. The hands are holding me up against a hard cold chest and there is something upon my neck, cool and moist.

My eyes open with a start when I realize that Barnabas has his face into the crook of my neck.

Suddenly I feel his back going rigid and in a flash he pulls his head back only to lean forward with extreme speed. His fangs bite down upon my infected skin, just where the bite marks are and I cry out in pain. What in God's name is he doing? Pain erupts up and down my neck and I can feel the tension even upon my spine and toes. His hand around my back tightens and I start thrashing in his arms. He growls and pulls away, his lips bloodied and a snarl upon his face.

"Stop moving!" he warns and then he's back upon my neck, his lips tightly wrapped around the infected area. I try to calm down but the reflexive urge to back away from the pain is so tempting that my entire form jerks in his hold. But then he starts sucking the infected blood and there is sweet relief upon my burning skin. The sweat that has gathered upon my forehead and upper lip causes me to shudder but my features go lax as the pain starts ebbing away from my body. A long breath escapes me and then he's pulling his lips away and I can hear his heavy breathing and I can feel his breath upon my skin. He releases my head and reaches up to wipe at his mouth but he hasn't let a drop escape.

I blink and turn my eyes upon him, looking at him with shock.

"Thank you." I breathe out and all he does is stare at me, "Won't that hurt you?" I whisper because in a strange way I do care. A lot.

He simply shakes his head in the negative and I swallow hard as he leans forward again, probably to heal the marks and I stand still for him to work.

I feel his lips and tongue upon my neck and I decide to think of this as absolutely clinical but then there is a change. He's lingering far longer than I know he should.

My eyes widen in alarm when I feel just his lips brushing my skin and when the feather light kisses turn firmer and hungrier my hands clasp his shoulders.

I gasp out loud and he groans deep in his throat as his attentive ministrations turn sensual and seductive. His form is more relaxed and I can feel his hand, his fingers, brushing up and down my back as he kisses me. My fingers thread on their own accord in his dark hair and I am clutching the short strands tightly in my fist as his lips trail up to my ear. My heart starts beating faster as I feel his breath upon the shell of my ear and when I hear his voice I start to realize that this is going far further than I can bear it to go.

"Jane." He sounds breathless and suddenly my limbs coil in, my form goes stiff and I squeeze my eyes shut because I no longer know if this or my dreams are reality. I have to tell him. I have to describe my dreams to him.

"I…" I open my mouth to talk and he pulls back to look at me.

"Yes? Are you in any pain-…"

"No." I push him back with my hands and he frowns before alarm makes his eyes flare up with worry.

"I apologize. That was uncalled for." He pulls his hands away and covers his mouth with his hand as he remains looming over me.

"I have to tell you something. I've been having these…" I trail off and he nods.

"Yes?"

Is there something in his tone? I cannot tell what it is.

"These odd dreams-…"

I am cut off when the door is thrust open and Angelique storms in. I look up at her and I can see that she's furious.

"You little bitch. I knew there was something about you but I couldn't put my finger on it." She whispers with wide eyes.

I frown, "What-…"

"Leave her alone." Barnabas growls as he gets in front of me, crouching with a snarl upon his lips.

She spares him a glance, "What are you going to do? Compel me to forget everything again? Shall I remind you that you can no longer do that? Shall I remind you that it was a matter of time before I remembered what I knew? All those years ago? Stand up." She orders me with a wave of her hand.

I tremble but I start sitting up.

"No!" Barnabas' hand is upon my chest then. He pushes me back down with force.

"Let her stand and move away before I am tempted to drill her eyes out. I recall how much you love them." She hisses and then she's pushing him away with a motion of her hand.

He lands a few feet away but I am too shocked to do anything smart right now. What the hell is she talking about? Years ago? I didn't know him until a few months ago. Sure enough I have these odd dreams from the past and future but these were my own creation…Or perhaps illusions because of our bond.

"Stand up!" she barks at me and as I start sitting up Barnabas flies in front of me again.

"I said no." he says in a low voice as his hands create a barrier between me and her.

"You have no understanding." She shakes her head and I can see, with shock, that her eyes are brimming with tears, "Very well." And then her eyes are narrowing into small slits and she's locking her blue gaze with his. For a moment nothing happens but then I see his body tensing up.

A gurgled groan escapes his lips and then he cries out loudly, startling me and making me step back. I look up at Angelique and I can see that her eyes are literally spitting fire. They are as red and bright as molten hot lava and it hurts when you look at them. I stagger back and rub my eyes but then a blood curling scream from Barnabas grabs my attention. I look at him and my throat goes dry.

_Oh My God._

His hands are buried in his hair and he falls on his knees in front of me. His eyes are squeezed shut and as I take a step forward I can see blood running down his cheeks. My heart stops when I realize that the blood is leaking from his tightly shut eyes.

I curl my hands into fists and before I know what I'm doing I am speaking; quietly at first and then in a louder voice.

"Stop." I murmur but she doesn't. She's completely out of control. I look up at her when she doesn't and I can see that the white is completely gone from her eyes. Her whole body is shaking and her feet are not even touching the ground. She looks like the devil himself.

"Stop it!" I cry out louder as Barnabas' whimpers bring tears into my eyes. My palms start to sweat as I keep my fingers curled in a fist and I can feel my nails digging into the skin of my palm, drawing blood.

"For God's sake! Stop it!" I yell in a barely recognizable voice but she's relentless. His groans of pain are ripping my thundering heart apart.

I leap forward but then Barnabas' hand is upon my calf, preventing me from stepping forward. Paying him no heed I break free from his hold and my success just proves how weak he is.

In an act of stupidity that I know I will regret later, I pounce on her and use my body to throw her off her feet and right off balance. I groan because she feels so hard and hot and the contact makes me fly back from her. She falls onto the ground and the spell seems to break because I can hear Barnabas breathing loudly but he's no longer moaning in pain.

I land on my back next to Angelique and my forehead catches the rough stone wall. I can already feel blood leaking from the incision but I don't care. I immediately scamper backwards and away from her as she blinks and turns her horrifying eyes on me. Every hair on my body stands on end as she starts crawling towards me on her hands and knees.

"You. Always you and her." She hisses and I can almost swear that acid just flew out of her mouth, "Come here. I won't hurt you." She murmurs in a sickly sweet voice and I yelp when her hand closes around my ankle. I jerk my leg in a vain attempt to get away from her but her grip is like iron around me. As she pulls me towards her I feel like a lifeless body that is being pulled into the bottom of the ocean by a heavy rock. Heavens, how can she be so strong?

I cry out when her nails bite hard onto my skin and I can feel my robe riding up my thighs as she slides me roughly towards her.

She traps me under her body and her hands fly to my neck. I grab her wrists tightly as she starts to squeeze but then she's suddenly knocked right off of me. I breathe in huge gulps of air and I shuffle backwards but then I see Barnabas and her a few feet away from me. He has his arm around her throat in a death grip and his free hand is grasping onto her hair, pulling her head back and back. His eyes catch mine and they flare with fire.

"Get out!" he exclaims and when I don't oblige he starts barking at me in a hoarse voice, "For the love of God, Jane! Get out!"

I blink and eye the wide open door. I am torn between the desire to flee and the urge to help him. I start shuffling towards the door and I jump when Angelique releases a loud scream of sheer fury.

Just as I have one hand under the threshold I see the door coming towards me. I cry out when my hand is crashed between the door and the threshold and I bite my tongue from the volume of the pain I can feel up and down my arm.

Barnabas' snarl is loud and palpable around us and then there is a sickening crunching sound as the door presses further onto my hand with more strength a door should possess. I can feel my fingers cracking and I scream. I tug my hand free and the door closes firmly shut. The sound echoes around the cell. I turn around while cradling my broken hand to my chest and what I see makes me loose the earth from under my feet.

Angelique has her hand around Barnabas' throat and she's holding him high up against the wall. He's struggling but it's useless because suddenly iron chains spring from the ground underneath us. The chains slide up towards him and as he sees them approaching he starts thrashing against her hold. The chains curl around his legs first and then slip further up his torso until he's all covered in iron. He growls and bares his fangs at the witch who releases her hold on him. He falls to the ground like a ragdoll and he doesn't move as he stares up at her with such hate that seems to pulse out of him in waves.

"This is for trying to fool me, my love. It was about time I remembered. Think on your sins." She is out of breath as she steps back and then turns towards me.

I stumble and start walking backwards but an unseen force slaps me hard against the closest wall. I see stars from the impact but I quickly open my eyes when I hear her coming closer to me.

"Jane...Jane, yes? Jane Wald." She smirks as she tries to smooth down her disheveled hair.

I frown, "It's Walden." I fire back. The pain on my hand makes me go numb. I can barely form a coherent thought.

"Is it?" she cocks her head to the side and regards me with plain amusement and glee. She looks like she's just won the lottery, "Are you sure?" she grins widely and I can see two large bite marks upon her creamy shoulder.

"I don't know-…"

"You never did." And with those words she grabs my head and slams it hard against the wall.

Barnabas' enraged scream is the last thing I hear.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_The first thing I realize is that I cannot breathe. There's something upon my lips, blocking my air from reaching my lungs properly. I breathe in deeply through my nose and something warm and wet keeps brushing my lower lip. I frown and open my eyes slightly. I gasp and the movement aids my attacker. Only that no one is actually attacking me. Someone is kissing me; roughly, passionately. I see dark brown hair and pale skin and I know immediately who it is._

_Barnabas._

_I turn my head to the side and open my eyes wide, trying to take in my surroundings. The mouth that had been kissing me with such passion moves away from my lips and latches itself upon my neck._

_All I see around me are tall pine trees and the moon is high on the sky. What are we doing in the middle of the night out in the woods? Aren't we supposed to be locked in Angelique's prison? I tense up when I realize that this is another dream but unlike other times all I feel is safety surrounding me like a cocoon. Hands are upon my thighs and under my heavy skirt-…Wait. Heavy skirt?_

_I look down and I notice that I am dressed in old fashioned clothes again. The kisses upon my neck stop and then I feel the man pressing closer between my parted legs and I stiffen._

"_Jane." The voice is husky and the mouth returns on my lips. _

_Barnabas. _

_The human Barnabas. _

_The betrothed Barnabas. _

_The rosy cheeked Barnabas. _

_Oh my God. What's happening to me?_

_I try to speak but I find it hard to break the kiss because believe it or not it feels right. It's warm and soft and hard at the same time. The hands upon my legs are soft and hot, burning my skin, branding me with their eagerness and I almost swoon from the hurricane of emotions that threaten to drive me insane._

_What is real? What isn't real? Is this a dream or a life I have forgotten during the limbo of time? Who is real? The human Barnabas? The one who obviously sees me fit as a mistress? Or the vampire who has made it his goal to protect me and tie me to him forever? Which one should I trust? Should I speak to the human Barnabas? Will he understand me or the only thing he's interested in is the cheap comfort he can find right here? Between my legs and in my embrace? And is he even interested in _my_ reality? Or at least is he interested in the reality I think as real? I am not sure. If I decide to speak here, now, will I have the time? Or are my words going to be in vain?_

"_Jane?" he's speaking to me and I turn to look at him. He looks flushed but worried. I can see the lust is swimming in his eyes but he has stopped kissing me enough to murmur my name._

"_What's wrong?" he murmurs as he lifts his hand to cup my cheek, "Goodness, you're as white as a ghost. Are you ill? Are you cold?" he abruptly releases me and my feet touch the ground with a thud. Then his hands are upon my face and down my arms. The next moment he's cupping my hands in his and he starts rubbing them to warm them._

"_How insensitive of me…" he shakes his head as he purses his lips in anger, "I pounced like an animal. Forgive me." He looks up at me and I want to cry at the warmth in his gaze._

_Suddenly I have my answer; yes, I can talk. Yes, he is interested in me. No one else has ever been before. Only him. And I don't care in which form he is. He is the only one who cares. I don't care of the reason why. All relationships are based in some odd forms of codependency. It's our nature to expect things from others._

"_I'm alright." I murmur but it's barely audible. I try to speak louder but I cannot._

_He hears me however and smiles at me, "It's been days. I've missed you." He leans forward and captures my lips again and I am lost in it for a moment before I push him slightly away._

_He swallows hard and eyes me with indecision, "Is there something you wish to say? Why are you looking at me like that? I promised I will talk to Josette-…"_

"_No."_

_That's the least of my worries, "No. Where are we?" I ask instead and my voice is the same whisper._

_He frowns and cups my cheek, "In the woods behind Collinwood." He replies, "Jane what's wrong?"_

"_And the year?" I ask but even as I speak I can hear my voice getting quieter. I panic for I must be waking up._

"_1777-…"_

"_Who is Josette?" I ask quickly._

_He falters and looks at me with extreme worry, "Jane…you know who Josette is. I cannot move things very fast-…"_

"_Who is she?" I snap because I don't have much time._

"_My fiancée. What-…"_

"_Who is Victoria?" I ask because he might know that woman too._

"_Victoria? What are you talking about?" he whispers and as he tries to wrap his arms around me I can feel the air around us getting thicker and thicker. The sky starts darkening and loud thunder erupts, causing us to fly apart. I stumble and fall but the earth under me gives away and I am falling down, down until the smell of humid soil is so strong that I can barely breathe._

_My back hits the harsh ground and then-…_

My eyes snap open and I gasp. Pain makes me cry out and I cradle my hurt hand against my chest. I am on my back and there is light in my prison. I know this room, this cell. It's my old room. The one I was in before she took me to him.

I start to panic. I shuffle backwards until I am leaning against the wall and because I cannot help it I burst into loud sobs of despair.

I know it then. I am going mad.

**End of chapter 8**

**Author's note: Thank you for reading. Please comment. It's my only payment and let me be honest, one of the two reasons I am writing this. The other is because I love writing. :p**

**So, please review before you go. Thoughts and ideas are always welcome!**

**Also, the ones who haven't yet, go and check the sneak peek for my upcoming DS story 'Holy Matrimony'…The link for it is on my profile.**

**Until next time!**

**Xxx Lina :o)**


	10. Chapter 9

**A/N: Welcome, welcome! I want to thank the following people for their comments: AlyxVance, MissMisc3, ForeverACharmedOne, Jandra1969, BlooperLover, missyclone, dionne dance, CharlieCats, Makrciana, XantheXV, ElleWillBite, TinkerbellxO and 88dragon06. Thank you for sticking with me and I mean it!**

**On with the story.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Chapter 9**

'_**For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart.**_

_**It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.'**_

_**~Judy Garland**_

When I was a little girl I used to fear the dark. It didn't matter if I was alone or with company. The dark always creates an illusion of creatures that are coming to get you. When I was about five years old the power had gone off in our house and I had woken up in cold sweat. I had just somehow felt that something was wrong. My parents were already up, trying to check what was wrong but I was too scared to even move from the comfort of my bed. But it was not only the fear of darkness that had kept me rooted on my mattress. It had been a dark figure near my window. I don't know what it was but I was foolish enough to believe that it was a demon or a ghost that had come to get me because I had been bad.

I had felt eyes on me and I was barely holding in my whimpers. But then suddenly the figure moved and with a wave of his shadowy hand light had illuminated my room. I had been so confused, so scared but then I saw the presence's face and I had realized that demons did not look so beautiful. The ghost or whatever it had been had translucent skin but what had struck me the most was his eyes because the rest of him had been indistinguishable. His gaze, brown like warm molten honey and friendly had settled upon me and before I had the chance to talk or even move he was gone in a flash. The light that he had brought with him lingered for a few seconds and then it was gone.

A moment later my mother had burst into the room, asking if I was okay but I couldn't speak. But my odd meeting with the creature was eventful because from that day I no longer feared the dark.

So, being in the dark right now is no problem for me. What is my problem though is my aching leg and hand. The pain on my leg is not extreme but it throbs numbly. What hurts like hell is my crushed hand. My fingers feel frozen and swollen and I cannot move them. Hell, I don't even try to because the pain is so extreme and sharp that brings tears in my eyes.

I try not to think about it much but it is nearly impossible because I have nothing else to do than think on my misery. I have not tried to sleep. I am too alert to rest and…I feel odd.

I cannot describe it but I feel as if someone has ripped out a part of me; as if someone has stolen a part of my self. That worries me because I have a suspicion of what it means. I finger my wrist and a heavy weight settles down upon my chest. Am I…Am I actually missing him? If that is so, then the bond actually works. That instead of bringing me fear it kind of brings me comfort. Because someone actually cares for me. He protected me against Angelique. He tried to but she knows all his weaknesses and now…now she knows something about me that I have yet to understand. I know that there is something wrong with me. My dreams or whatever they are have made it clear enough. My bond with Barnabas goes way back. In another life perhaps but it is not just that. I have dreams, flashes of the future so that means that my future life is with him as well. That brings me some relief but also confusion. Will he tell me what I need to know or will he lie to me? Will he make me understand what Angelique meant when she said that he had compelled her to forget? I pause at that.

Angelique. She seemed furious with me and my suspicions are confirmed. She knew me but she had not recognized me until recently. That means that I am…What? A reincarnation? Angelique had called me Jane Wald. I don't think it was a mistake because I distinctly remember that in my dream Barnabas had called my father Mr. Wald instead of Walden.

A shiver goes up and down my spine as I think of what she will do to me now. I don't even know how for many hours I've been left alone. It's hard to tell in this darkness.

I need to stop thinking because I already feel a headache spreading through my skull. I need to calm down, I need to concentrate and gather my thoughts. I have to sleep. I wonder if that will help me but as I lean back and close my eyes I don't care. Perhaps for once I will welcome the dreams and even learn something from them. Convinced that they are better than my current reality, I let Morpheus drag me into the depths of sleep.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_Something soft and itchy is under me, tickling my bare back-…_

_My eyes snap open. Bare back? I look down and good Lord on heaven! I am naked. A vicious blush travels up my neck and lands on my cheeks but I am too shocked to move. I am lying upon fluffy hay. A dark and very male coat is covering my front and upon the coat there is a head. My eyes must look as wide as saucers because as I try to shift I feel something pressing between my parted legs. The man who is sleeping upon my chest looks content to be there. I realize with a start that he is lying between my legs clad in a wrinkled shirt and a pair of dark breeches. The shirt is pushed back and his shoulders and upper back are shining with a dissolving layer of sweat._

_An undignified yelp escapes me and my hand flies to cover my mouth but it's already late because he stirs. His cheek nuzzles my chest through the coat and a small smile appears on his lips as his eyelids start flickering. _

_Barnabas' eyes lock with mine a moment later and I can tell that he is rather amused by my expression._

_I gulp as he pulls his head away from my chest and shifts up. His nose brushes mine and then his lips cover my own in a deep kiss. His mouth soft, warm and wet parts mine and then his tongue is in my mouth stealing my breath away. His hands come to land in my loose hair and he supports himself up on his elbows as he kisses me. My mouth remains frozen for a while but then I let it part further. He groans into the kiss as I return it with some reservation and then he pulls back._

"_Are you cold?" his hand finds my knee and he pulls it up against his waist as he presses his body closer. He pulls his other hand from the hay and reaches down between us, fumbling with something and I am too shocked to move. Is he…Oh, Jesus. He wants to-…_

"_Jane?" he cuts through my thoughts and I look up at him. His eyes are alight with an emotion that is not totally familiar to me but I can tell by the way he's leaning into me that it's desire._

_My heart starts beating wildly in my chest under his intense gaze and as he pauses and looks at me with increasing worry I realize that he actually wants an answer._

"_I'm not cold." I blurt out and then his hands are both on my legs and his sliding me closer to him, pulling me nearer to that part of him that is pressed against my inner thigh._

_I gasp as his mouth finds mine again and as he moves further down I wind my arms around his shoulders to anchor myself. As his mouth takes mine, I panic because I am not sure if we've done this before. I know that I, the normal Jane, hasn't but from the way we are lying here I am not sure. _

_Suddenly, his fingers slide between us and curl tightly around the coat. I gasp against his lips as he tugs the material away from my body and then his hand is upon my bare skin, stroking and sliding over my chest until I am breathless._

_His mouth pulls away and then his lips are sliding down my cheek to my chin where he lingers. His fingers trail down my stomach and my muscles clench under his palm._

_I squeeze my eyes shut and bite my lip as his mouth finds the side of my neck. When he stars suckling the skin I realize that I can either let him continue or make him talk. I don't know what to do._

"_B-Barnabas?" I breathe out and he hums in response as his fingers dip between my legs._

"_My love?" he murmurs as he nuzzles my neck with his nose and lips._

_My eyes peruse the space around us and I realize that we are in a stable. In a darkened part of it anyway. A candle is illuminating the room and there is a door across from us. I exhale with relief when I see that it is firmly shut._

"_What time is it?" I murmur as I try not to get too dizzy from his touch alone._

_He pulls away from my skin and regards me with a small frown, "Um…" he reaches out with one hand and slips his fingers into his coat pocket. He pulls it out and opens his pocket watch. It is gold with an intricate design on the lid._

"_After midnight." He slams it shut and looks at me with alarm, "You have to go? I thought you said you could stay longer tonight." He actually looks crestfallen and my heart clenches._

_Good God, how can he have such an effect on me?_

"_No…I…" his frown deepens at my indecision and I close my eyes, "I can stay." I whisper and a smile lightens up his entire face. I am almost blinded._

_His hand touches my face and he threads his fingers into my strands before he pulls my head up for a kiss. His free hand clutches at my thigh and in a swift move he pulls it up and around his hip. I can feel him pressing against me and I am suddenly too warm. I feel like my skin is on fire as his mouth plunders mine with such need that I wonder how serious he is about me; about my previous self. Does he…does he love me? Do I?_

_My latter question is answered as my body responds to him on its own. My legs coil tightly around his hips and as he moves lower I can feel my resolve slipping as he pulls his lips away to gasp my name. My hands curl around his forearms and they dig into his skin through his shirt as he pulls his hips back with the very clear intention of pushing inside me. His mouth closes around my earlobe as he enters me and my eyes go wide when I feel…no pain. My shock is so big that I freeze up under him. I don't know how it should feel but I feel odd…and _peculiar_ but not afraid. _

_He immediately senses my abrupt change in demeanor and he pulls back to look down at me._

"_Jane?" he whispers and I lock my eyes with his. I shiver._

"_You want me to stop?" he asks me and I don't know what to say to that. I should be asking questions instead of…God, I am lost._

"_Jane, you're scaring me." He pulls back and rolls onto his side, his hands reaching for my face. Once he has it grasped, he runs his thumbs under my eyes and I hadn't realized that I am crying._

"_Heavens, did I hurt you?" one of his hands slides between my legs and I quickly close them, trapping his hand and his eyes go wide._

"_I'm fine." I shake my head and grasp his face in my hand before I pull him to me. He's not going to talk if I cry and behave like a damn virgin…Well, in reality that's what I am but it seems like the eighteenth century was different for me. I flush as I think about it and then even more because he's moving back on top of me. He doesn't pull his hand away from my core and my breathing hitches as his lips catch mine again. He kisses me but then he pulls back to press his lips against my forehead._

"_Don't ever cry again." He murmurs as his fingers press against me and his leg parts my thighs so he can settle between them again, "Swear it." He hisses and I am so confused. What on earth does he see in me? Why would he risk his position in his family for me?_

"_I swear." I murmur back and he smiles before he presses his cheek against mine, "But I have a few questions-…Oh God!" I almost yelp as he enters me again and this time I am seeing stars when I close my eyes._

"_Questions?" he asks as he pulls back only to thrust forward again, "Tell me." He breathes with a grin as he starts to move steadily, his hands on either side of my head, his lips brushing mine with every move._

_I start to wonder if my mind has gone so sick that I am seeing erotic dreams instead of visions. My mouth goes dry at that thought._

"_Don't freak out." I warn and he looks down at me, his hips slowing down their pace._

"_Beg pardon? Freak out?" he frowns in the most adorable way and I can see that he's fighting hard the urge to simply clamp my mouth shut._

_I shake my head, "Don't be mad." I correct and he blinks._

"_Why would I be mad?" he shakes his head and kisses me, "I'd never be mad at you." He smiles and my heart soars._

_**Compose yourself!** My inner voice is sharp and of course it has a point._

"_Why am I your mistress?" I blurt out and every muscle in his body goes rigid before he stops. He's breathless but so ruffled. Oh Jesus._

"_I…" he fights to find the right words, "I don't know what to say to that." He admits and I frown, "I love you." He replies simply and when I stare at him he starts to pull back._

"_Barnabas-…"_

"_But I can see that it's not reciprocated. Is that why you're unresponsive? Have I done something to make you doubt my affections?"_

_And then he does the unthinkable, he pulls back and quickly covers me with his coat, "I see." he murmurs when I don't respond, "Get dressed. I shall take you home." He mutters as he sits back on his knees and turns away from me to fix his clothing._

_I start to panic. What have I done? Will this change the future? Why did I have to ask? My first instinct is to pinch myself because I need to wake up before I make a bigger mess out of this but I hesitate. He thinks I don't love him._

"_I broke the betrothal for you. What more can I do? My parents don't understand my choices. They think I am insane calling off the wedding. Josette is a heap of tears because of me and I am being pushed from a million different directions." He turns to look at me and I see anger in his face, "And you dare to ask me why I have you as my mistress? Mistress? The word brings vomit to my mouth." He abruptly stands and runs a hand through his short hair, "How can you be so cruel to me? I thought you understood." He glares at me with betrayal written all over his face and I panic even more._

_Now what? That's not what I meant. I simply wanted to know what in hell is going on._

"_I guess the environment is not ideal but I never thought that this," he motions to the stables around him, "would make you feel cheap. Apparently it does." He lowers his hands and shakes his head._

"_Forgive me if I offended you. I won't touch you again unless you give me permission to." His eyes lock with mine and I sputter like a fish before I stand. My knees feel wobbly and there is an ache or rather a sharp sting deep inside me. Once I realize what it is I flush but walk towards him nonetheless. I hug the coat tighter to my chest and his eyes follow me intently as I come to stand in front of him. His eyes roam my face and when they slip lower I flush and he gulps._

_I step even closer until I am standing so close that my chest brushes his._

"_I could try and explain but I fear you wouldn't understand." I say quietly, almost angrily._

_He licks his lips and frowns, "Try."_

"_I cannot." I take a deep breath and I quickly move in to kiss his mouth. He seems surprised but returns it and his hands wrap around my body, pulling me closer to him. His mouth hot and insistent parts my lips and in a quick move he pulls me off my feet. He presses me against the closest wall and I groan as my bare back hits the cool surface._

_My leg slides up his thigh on its own accord, trying to pull him closer and he moans as his hips collide with mine._

_A warm breeze blows around us and I open my eyes. Barnabas breaks the kiss and looks around him as well before he turns to look at me._

"_What's this?" he murmurs and I shrug because I am shocked that he even felt the peculiar wind. How on earth can it be windy? The windows and door are closed._

_Before I have time to think about that for long, the door of the stables bursts open and I gasp._

_Dark hair is the first thing that I see at the threshold and then a pair of ice blue eyes lock with mine. My mouth falls open in shock and Barnabas quickly whirls around to face the intruder. As soon as he sees who it is his body relaxes but he remains in front of me still._

"_Master?" Angelique's voice is incredulous and my throat goes dry. Is she powerful in this time? I don't know and that causes sweat to form on my brow. My fists clasp Barnabas' shirt and I try to disappear against the wall but it's useless._

"_Get out, please." His voice is firm but she is not budging, "Angelique." His voice sharpens, "Didn't you hear what I said? Go back to your quarters."_

"_Who is she?" she asks and her voice quivers. Suddenly I feel bad because the way she's looking at him is heartbreaking. I seriously wonder what he sees in me. She's beautiful._

"_That is none of your concern. Please, head back to your chamber. It's late." He dismisses her with a wave of his hand._

"_Is she the reason you stopped seeing me?"_

_Her accent is odd, thick and I realize that it reminds me of the French language. Her accent as I know her is American. You cannot tell that it's not her mother language._

_Barnabas stiffens and takes a step forward, "Watch your tongue. Do not meddle with my affairs." He says as he leans down and grabs my discarded dress. He hands it to me surreptitiously and I take it._

"_I know her." Angelique speaks up as she eyes me with hate, "I've seen her at the docks." She tries to step closer to me but she finds Barnabas blocking her way, "She's the daughter of a fisherman." She continues as she looks me up and down with distaste, "She's disgusting. How can you even-…" her words are cut off by his hand which lands harshly on her cheek in a slap._

_I gasp and cover my mouth with my hand to stifle my shock._

_Her blue eyes stare at him fearfully, almost incomprehensibly and he lowers his hand. He curls his fingers in a fist and shakes his head, "Don't speak of her again. You know nothing of it. Now get out." His voice is low and she stares at him with disbelief while cradling her cheek._

"_No."_

"_How dare you speak to me like that? Get out or I swear to God I will move you myself. But I guess, God has no meaning to you has he?" his voice is hoarse as he leans to speak into her ear and she pulls her head back to look at him with wide eyes._

"_I have no idea what you're talking about-…" she starts but she's cut off._

_"I won't say it again." His voice cuts through her words with finality and she glances at me venomously for one last time before she turns on her heel and walks away._

_Just before she walks out of the door I take a step forward but then an invisible hand curls around my throat and slams me hard against the wall. I cry out and before my vision goes back I see Barnabas' worried face hovering over me._

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

My cell door is slammed open and the telltale sound of heels alerts me of her entrance. Her arrival is to be expected. In fact, she's a bit late.

A sudden light appears in the middle of the room and I close my eyes with a wince.

"There you are. Right where you belong." Angelique murmurs in a low voice as she eyes me with distaste, "How do you feel? Are the dreams haunting you, hmm?" she cocks her head to the side and I frown. How on earth does she know about my visions?

Suddenly, she cackles and I jump, "Your face is so plain. No effort to hide your emotions whatsoever. I guess he liked that. The dazzled look in your eyes, the innocence." She comes and hovers over me and I want to move but my aching leg doesn't allow me, "The inexperience. Had you ever wondered how he knew so much about the bedroom, hmm?"

My eyes widen. Is she really going to have this conversation with me? Insane.

"I guess you never did. Pity. I could tell you things about him that'd make you blush." She purrs and I swallow hard.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I shake my head.

She smirks, "Cursed people mostly know that they are cursed but you…you don't. In fact, you're just starting to remember your past. Tell me, how does it feel to return in the exact same form you were centuries ago? I guess it's not encouraging for confidence." She chuckles but her insults are not getting to me because I am finally learning the truth. Let her talk. It's for my own good.

"Form?" I whisper.

"Same face, same body, same hair…same dull eyes. No improvement. Perhaps I ought to do something about that. But I fear that whatever I do will only make you look better." She scowls and I grit my teeth.

"Do you really think that your insults are getting to me? Will you heal my hand?" I say instead and she narrows her eyes.

"Now why would I do that? I don't owe you any kindness. He wiped my memories for you but now I remember everything. And by the time you're out of here you will do so as well. It's inevitable. Until then," she starts pacing, "You are going to answer my questions." She glances at me as she leans against the wall.

"Questions? Heal me first." I say and she smirks.

"Has your blood created a bond?" she asks me with fury and I gulp.

"Bond?" I frown, trying to seem ignorant, "What kind of bond-…"

"Don't give me that, little girl. Answer the question." She snaps at me.

"Heal my hand first. Then I will tell you." I raise my chin and she stares at me before she waves her hand towards my arm. I hear a crack as she sets my broken thumb right. I gasp and grit my teeth.

"Answer me."

"I guess it has."

"What kind of bond?"

I scan my brain for an answer.

"I guess he wants to protect me because I am his only food source."

Another crack as she sets another finger right, "Why are you his only source?"

"I don't know." An invisible kick to my hurt leg is her response and I wince, "It's the truth."

She contemplates, "What has he told you?"

"Nothing." I shake my head and she comes closer.

"Liar. Has he told you he wants you? Has he told you about the bond? Did you two laugh at me when you realized I wasn't aware of your connection?" she hisses as she grasps my chin and forces my head up, "Why do you always have to ruin things? You and her." She lets go of me and starts pacing again.

"Her?" I echo and she snarls.

"You and Josette." She pauses and turns to look at me with such fury that I can literally see it sparkling in her eyes, "I never understood if he wanted you or her. He still doesn't know. Why else would he be interested in that frail creature that looks exactly like her?" she mutters almost to herself and an odd feeling makes my stomach clench.

It's ridiculous for me to feel jealous. It's irrational but that doesn't change the fact that I am.

"So, you don't know Victoria." She speaks up as soon as she notices my expression, "Have no fear, he mostly feels guilty for leading her to her death." She winks at me.

"Death?"

"She killed herself. And may I say that it was rather enjoyable watching her fall right off Widow's." she snickers, "What a small, tiny curse can do, my dear. Her dead and you gone. Poof! He almost went mad and even when he made me forget you I still felt that I should hate him. That's why I had to lock him up. It was for his own good." She nods and then smiles, "So, tell me. How does it feel to be back in his life? The dreams must be exciting." Her smile is full of glee.

"Why do I have the dreams?" I ask her sharply because I can't take any more information. I cannot stand her mocking smile either.

"Because your mind starts remembering. Because the fog is starting to dissolve. And because the bloody bond _aches_ to be completed." She grimaces and abruptly stands, "But I don't really blame you. He thought that compelling me to forget you would have results. But my mind cannot be easily fooled." She turns and heads for the door and before I have the chance to speak she's gone.

I lean back against the wall and close my eyes. I want to think no longer.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

I am startled out of my sleep when my door bursts open. A heap of limbs and chains falls right in front of me and I cry out from shock. Barnabas winces and opens his eyes to look at me. The moment our eyes lock his light up with hope and I can see him swallowing rapidly. He's thirsty. I move forward and once I reach him I push his hair away from his forehead with my good hand. His eyes close in something akin to reverence and I almost smile but then she walks in and I tense up.

She is wiping her mouth with a handkerchief and then she smirks at me. I freeze when I notice the remnants of lipstick on Barnabas' lips as well. Suddenly, I feel sick.

"Men are not to be trusted, my dear. They will do anything for a little comfort and I never enjoyed pathetic humans but pathetic vampires are even worse. Enjoy your time together." She blows him a kiss and I can see his grimace of disgust as he stares at the door.

Not thinking, I reach out and rub at his mouth with my dirty robe sleeve, wiping the lipstick away.

His nose nuzzles my palm and I swallow hard but I allow him to do so. His eyes find mine and they are glimmering in the dark. Immediately I know what he wants; what he needs but I have to ask something first.

"That first day at the company…You knew who I was, didn't you?" I whisper and he gulps before he sighs and nods.

Feeling utterly foolish and naïve, I bite my lip and look away from him. His lips find my palm and he kisses it gently and my heart jumps. Suddenly, the bond, his behavior everything makes sense but it is too early for me to accept it. It's too much to process and instead of speaking, I bring my wrist closer to his mouth and watch with wide eyes as he latches onto the skin with eagerness. The chains around his body are loose and I push at them so he can free his hand. The moment his hand is free, he clasps my forearm and brings my hand even closer to his mouth before he starts to suck. My breath hitches as he nestles his head close to my chest and despite my anger at everything that has happened, I touch his hair with my free hand. His whimper of bliss is compensation enough for now.

**End of chapter 9**

**Author's note: Thank you for reading. I hope you enjoyed it. Please, please review before you go. It's my only payment and I've got to know if you like it or not.**

**The ones waiting for an update on **_**Holy Matrimony**_**, please know that the second chapter is up now. So, if you haven't read it due to the technical glitch, you can do so now.**

**Until next time!**

**Xxx Lina ;o)**


	11. Chapter 10

**A/N: Hello and welcome! Now, I should be working on my POTC story but I want to continue this so…You get another update!**

**Now, I want to thank the people who reviewed: 88dragon06, Jandra1969, MissMisc3, dionne dance, Makrciana, XantheXV, TinkerbellxO, ForeverACharmedOne and Jay D. Moore. You are all awesome for actually commenting. It's the only thing I receive for writing this…**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Chapter 10**

'**Edge…there is no honest way to explain it, because the only people who really know where it is are the ones who have gone over.'**

**~Hunter S. Thompson**

Lies. All he has ever told me is nothing more but lies. I don't know why he thought it wise to lie to me. How could he pretend that he didn't know me? But I guess I shouldn't be shocked that people can actually pretend so well. Just because I am an idiot doesn't mean others are too. I still cannot fathom how my life has taken such a dramatic turn. I do not distinguish reality from dreams now. But what I really wonder is if my dreams or flashbacks, whatever they are, are real or just my imagination.

Now, you would ask; he is right next to you. Looking at you with that lost gaze you have always thought to be endearing in puppies…So, why don't you ask? I'll tell you why.

Because I cannot speak. Literally. I don't know why and how but I just woke up one day without my ability to form words. The truth is I feel a bit…odd. I cannot seem to gather my thoughts. I feel empty; numb. Is this what being in shock really feels? If that is so then I am glad because it has ensured my silence. I really need the silence.

No. What I really want is to be back in my home and in my bed. I want to bury myself under my heavy covers and remain there until everything is gone. But I know that I cannot do that; not anymore.

I pull my hands away from my stringy hair and look at my robe. It's filthy. I am filthy again but I am certain that I must not expect any form of kindness from her anymore. She wants to destroy me. I crave to know what happened in the past…But I dare not ask for I fear the extra information will only mess with my head more. I scratch at a blood stain with my nail and I want to gag. I feel disgusting, used. The bond that somewhere in the middle of our time here had seemed to me something enthralling now seems just a manipulation tool so he could just be close to me without telling me the truth.

I feel so much anger but I know that I cannot let it show right now because I am afraid. Afraid of what will happen now. I don't know how many days it's been since she brought him into my cell. Maybe it's been weeks, months…I am not aware of time anymore but I can tell you precisely how many times he's fed from me. Four. So, it cannot be that many days…or can it? I am not sure for he seems a bit weak. Maybe I should ask…Oh, but I cannot speak. Should I be worried about that?

I shake my head and tug at my robe nervously. It's not a surprise when he notices.

"Jane?" he murmurs as he starts crawling towards me on his hands and knees. The chains have been discarded on the far side of the room since…I don't know since when.

"What is the matter?" he frowns as he looks at my face, "Jane, you're bleeding." His voice is a bit strained and I frown.

Bleeding? Again? Where?

I don't have to wonder for long because he reaches out with his hand and wipes at the corner of my mouth. His thumb is bloodied when he pulls his fingers away.

My eyes widen and I reach up to wipe at my lips. I hadn't realized that I had been biting my lip so hard. Odd. I didn't feel the pain. I actually laugh and his eyes widen in alarm as I do so.

He must think me insane. Oh, yes. He does. Look at the way he's gazing at me. I stop laughing and bite my lip again before I run my hands through my tangled hair. Can he move away a little? He's stifling me. I cannot breathe properly when he's around. Is that normal? I start to panic as I think about that. What in my life can actually be called normal? Nothing.

I place my hand over my chest as I pant for breath and my eyes widen in alarm at how short and uneven my breaths are. What in hell is happening to me?

"Jane?" his voice sounds far away and as the hot droplets leak from my eyes I realize that I am not experiencing a panic attack. I am crying.

_Jesus, no. Just stop it._ Tears never helped anyone and I never cry in front of others. I just don't.

"Heaven's sake, Jane!" Barnabas' hands touch my shoulders but I reflexively push them away. He cannot touch me; not right now. But he is relentless for he reaches out again and this time I am just too breathless to stop him. His cold fingers curl around my shoulders and in a swift move he pulls me to him. My face finds the soft material of his shirt under his dirty vest and I lean heavily against him as tears cloud my vision and make my throat dry.

His arms wrap tightly around my form and I want to scream at him that I cannot breathe but I realize that is my own fault because I have clamped my mouth shut. I need to breathe through my nose. I need to clear my vision. I need to stop crying for God's sake.

As I stand there shaking, he starts running his fingers through my hair and they get caught in the tangles and I am ashamed that I am in this condition. How can his clothes be in such better condition than my own?

I can feel him moving and I realize that he's sitting back so he's holding me against his chest. One of his hands leaves my back and then the bottle of water is placed upon my tightly shut lips. I part them and take a sip before I push it away. I am nauseous. I cannot even keep water down. It must be my empty stomach.

His hand grasps my own and he pulls it against his chest, over his silent heart and I shudder because I can feel how cool my own body is.

"No, no." he hisses as he rubs my fingers but he knows he cannot create warmth. He is shifting again and this time I feel him shrugging out of his heavy vest. I don't move. I feel like a ragdoll in his arms and I have never felt any more pathetic. But I have no power to keep standing up. I am so tired. I want to give up and sleep forever but of course I won't be that lucky.

His hands are upon me again, rubbing my skin through his vest and my dirty robe, trying to create friction, trying to create warmth but the cold skin of his chest against my cheek feels nice because for some odd reason it grounds me. My anger starts to dissipate and I frown against his collarbone because I want to be angry, I want to inform him that his lies are making me sick but I cannot, because the way he is touching me causes more tears to gather in my eyes. Why must he touch me like this? Even when he's selfish enough to feed from me, he is always touching me in this peculiar way. Like I am the most fragile thing in the world. I snort through my tears because I must feel like I am made of terribly thin glass in his arms. His hold is strong and unyielding and he doesn't seem weak at all. Unlike me, he has terrible strength and he could put me out of my misery with a single move. Perhaps he should do so…Perhaps then I'd be left alone and he could be with that other woman Angelique claimed that he has feelings for. Oh but how can I forget? Angelique won't let him go because she wants him.

I startle when I feel his fingers on my cheek, wiping my tears away and I close my eyes because I really want to sleep but then I feel the horrible cramps in my stomach and I swallow hard against the urge to empty my stomach. What is there to empty? Nothing. Only air and water.

"Jane…" he whispers and his cool breath is disturbing my hair as he talks, "My sweet Jane. You must talk to me."

I swallow hard at his words. Why must he walk to me like that? Does he think it'll make me feel better?

"I am so sorry." He is speaking through his teeth, "Angelique!" his voice is loud, too loud. It's a scream and I wince but I am only pulled tighter into his body. Without meaning to, I wind my arms around his middle and I hear his soft growl as he presses his chin against the top of my head. I don't know why I did this…Perhaps the combination of his loud bark and Angelique's name made my fear greater.

"Angelique!" his voice echoes in the empty air around us and I shiver because after a moment I can hear soft chuckling.

She had planned to make me this weak…But why? Is she the reason why I cannot speak?

Suddenly she appears into the middle of the room and I jump. Barnabas' hands hold me fast against him.

"You called, my love?" she croons and I close my eyes shut. The mere sound of her voice makes me sick.

"Help her." Barnabas' voice is strained and she clicks her tongue.

"Why? What's the matter?" she purrs and I can hear her heels as she steps closer to us.

"You know what's wrong. Why is she not talking?" he asks calmly but then he explodes, "Stop laughing, you Satan!" his voice rattles the door and the volume alone causes it to slam firmly shut.

I whimper because I cannot take this anymore. I want to sleep. Right here. Right in his arms.

"My, my. Look at that. You're always on edge when it has to do with her. All she needs is some food and sleep. Ah! Maybe a few more dreams."

"What dreams?" Barnabas' voice is dripping with barely contained hatred and I gulp. Does he not know about my dreams?

"Darling, her previous life is coming to her. My curse can only last that long. Her bliss of ignorance will be over soon. Weak curses tend to have this result. She will remember everything." I can hear her as she comes closer, "Like I did." She murmurs, "Just hope she is sane by that time…or alive because you can be rather voracious when you're thirsty-…"

"You devil…" Barnabas' voice is incredulous, "You took her away from me. How is that possible? You didn't remember-…"

"But I felt that something was wrong. I am a witch. So, when my curse was made…I only wished what I _felt_ I should wish. I demanded that whatever you did to me should happen to her as well. I cursed her to forget and…And she did…Until she decided to take her life because her memories were all but gone."

"Shut up! Why are you doing this?" Barnabas' hands cover my ears but it's too late because I heard everything.

I …took my own life because she drove me crazy with her spells? Then how am I alive now? How can I be here?

"Oh, don't be so dramatic. This is a new Jane; a Jane that wouldn't have remembered you if you hadn't seduced her with the bond. The mind is a great tool, my love. You and I both know that."

"I am not like you. I demand that you heal her right now."

"Heal her? From what?"

"She doesn't talk."

"Ah, that's because she's weak. A human's mind can only take that much, Barnabas. Kill her and have it done. There's no turning back. She's useless. Look how she is clinging to you."

I am frozen because she is right. I feel empty…cold.

"She's a living corpse. The women who love you seem to share your curse-…"

"Silence!" Barnabas' screams at her before he puts me aside and stands, "Stop twisting everything! What do you want to make her healthy again? Name your prize."

"Prize? What makes you think I'd help her?" I turn to look up at her and she smirks at me before she looks at Barnabas, "I am happy to see her this way-…"

She is cut off by his hand which he curls forcefully around her throat. Her eyes widen minutely and she clasps his wrist in her hand.

"Stop playing with me. What do you want?" he hisses and she grins.

"What do you offer?"

"Money."

She throws her head back and laughs, "I have plenty of that."

He growls and throws her away from him. She lands hard against the wall and I close my eyes as I shuffle backwards. My eyes feel heavy and I lean my head back. I really want to fall asleep.

"She needs food. Clean clothes. Heavens, what do you want from her?"

His voice is far away and before I know it I am unconscious. I am in heaven.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_I find myself in a dark, long corridor. The walls around me are grand, heavy and thick. The portraits on them are various with golden frames and vibrant colors and I am at awe. It's beautiful and I find myself smiling. The air smells of lilacs and the carpet under my thin shoes is thick and fluffy. When I notice my old fashioned clothes I am not shocked. I have come to expect these kind of dreams. I have come to crave them. _

_Odd, isn't it? Crave something old but at the same time so comforting at times. My sleep is far better than my reality and I wish that I never wake up. I want to keep being here; in this lovely house that screams of wealth that I have never seen before._

_A small giggle escapes my mouth as I eye various family heirlooms that are artistically put on a large stand by the right side of the long corridor. Porcelain, mahogany wood, all expensive and pretty and I cannot take my eyes off of them._

_I approach and take a closer look but my attention is caught by something at the opposite side of the stand. It's a portrait of a dark haired woman. As I approach I frown. Good God. The woman looks like me. My eyes widen and I reach up to touch the silver frame but I cannot feel it under my fingertips. Sometimes in dreams we don't have all of our senses, right? _

_Shrugging, I settle for looking at it and I smile. I am dressed in a plain but pretty vanilla dress and a silk ribbon is wrapped around my middle. It's the color of midnight blue and it suits my pale skin. The silver frame it is carved to resemble tiny rose blossoms and I grin. It's so beautiful that I am stunned. My face has a gentle smile and unlike photographs that I have seen in the past, this picture actually compliments me. I think the artist has deliberately drawn me prettier. I notice that in my hand I am holding a red rose. I frown the more I look at it because I wonder who on earth drew me? As a matter of fact I need to find out whose mansion this is._

_I don't have to wonder for long for as I take a few steps down the hall I notice a door that unlike the other ones has a golden doorknob. I hesitate in opening it. Do I have to? And if I do, what will I see behind it?_

_Taking a deep breath I put my hand around it and I slowly open it. At first I see nothing but then I notice the grand bed just across the fireplace. The air reeks of the scent of wine and I wiggle my nose as I take a few steps closer. The drapes around the king sized bed are drawn and I gulp. Something causes me to hesitate and when the fire from the hearth cackles behind me I jump a bit. I place my hand over my chest and take my time to study the chamber. Dark red drapes that match the ones of the bed, dark carpet that is so thick that my feet can actually feel the heaviness of it even as I stand on it and the dark mahogany of the furniture. I turn in a circle and a smaller frame catches my eye. It is…Jesus, it's me again. And this time it's a close up portrait of my face. You can see every detail in it, every line. You can even see my blush as I was posing for it._

_I realize then where I am. In Barnabas' room. But where is he? A sound from the bed causes me to whirl around. What is that sound?_

_Frowning, and a bit worried, I tiptoe towards the bed. I raise my hands and grasp at the drapery. I take a quiet breath and slowly peer inside. At first I see nothing but a bundle of silk covers and sheets but then I focus more clearly and what I see causes me to freeze._

_Barnabas, the human Barnabas, is on the bed, on his back. His shirt is parted and only a few buttons near his stomach are done but that's not what grasps my attention. A feminine hand is curled around the white material and as I follow the hand I notice the figure hiding under the covers. Dark chocolate brown hair is peeking from the sheets at his navel and as Barnabas' groan echoes around the room I want to gag. My horrified eyes settle upon his slack jaw and closed eyes and I cover my mouth with my hand to stifle my cry of rage and…betrayal. Why do I feel this way?_

_Then there is movement near his thighs and as soon as I notice the face that is revealed as soon as the covers are pushed away from her head I cannot help it, I scream and stumble back. _

_Barnabas' eyes snap open and land towards my direction and for a moment they are too foggy with lust to really notice me._

_Soft chuckling reaches my ears and I look at Angelique as she slowly makes her way up his body while biting her slick lower lip. I realize with a start that his eyes were not directed towards me. They were focused on Angelique. _

_I grab onto the bedpost and look around me. What on earth is going on? Why does he have pictures of me if this was before he met me-…_

_I then realize that perhaps it is not before me…Perhaps it is... Suddenly, I feel sick and I turn away from the scene just as her lips cover his._

_I clamp a hand over my mouth because I realize that they cannot see me. I am nothing but air in their eyes._

_But I can see and I can listen. I can hear everything. The slick sounds of their passionate kissing, the way the sheets rub up against their bodies, the hoarse moans of Angelique and the rapid breathing of the man that has been haunting my dreams for weeks._

_I have to wake up now. I need to or else I think I am going to loose my sanity and any kind of respect I have for the man that has so fiercely protected me so far. I look around before I step into the corridor but everything is dark. I can feel my heartbeat accelerating and I try to calm down and gather my bearings but I cannot because I can still hear them and unlike other times nothing happens. I do not wake up._

_I close my eyes and try to concentrate on something, anything but the couple in the room but the noises, even the breathing that I hear, feel like a pierce into my heart. This is insane. I must be delusional… Or cursed just like the witch said. I might be both because when I open my eyes I am back inside the room and this time things are much more graphic than earlier. I don't know how or why it happens but I find myself sobbing and screaming. I try to keep my mouth shut but even as I close it I can still hear my voice, hoarse and loud, echoing in the stone walls around us._

_I don't know how but the movement on the bed suddenly freezes and there is some moving around until I can see with my own eyes as Barnabas throws Angelique off of him. She lands next to him on the bed clad only in her unlaced corset. His eyes wide, unfocused and alarmed land on my form and I can see the change on his face._

"_Jane." The murmur is barely audible and then his eyes fall on his half naked form and then on the woman next to him._

_He jumps back until he's near the edge of the bed and looks at the witch as if seeing her for the first time._

"_No." he shakes his head and his terrified gaze lands on me again, "Jane."_

"_Yes, not sweet Jane, am I, my love? Sweet Jane is fearful of even touching you, isn't she?" Angelique murmurs as she smirks at him._

_I can see his nostrils flaring as he looks at her but then he turns towards me again._

"_Jane…"_

"Jane, wake up! For the love of God, stop this! Jane!"

Hands are shaking me awake and I stir, my eyes fluttering as I process the cold touch upon my sweat slicked skin. Am I…am I naked?

My eyes snap open then and I can see Barnabas holding me against his chest while pushing off my wet robe.

I start wiggling in his arms but as soon as he sees me awake he freezes and cups my cheeks.

"It was not real. That was not real. Please, believe me. Nothing like this ever happened. It was an illusion. I beg of you-…No!"

I push his hands away and shuffle backwards as I grab the discarded robe and use it as shield for my bare skin.

I stare at him and he shakes his head as he detects the mistrust in my eyes.

"That means my other dreams were not real." I speak for the first time after days and his eyes light up.

"No…What you saw…what we saw just now never happened. I swear on my honor-…"

"Do you have one, Barnabas?" I whisper hoarsely and with great difficulty and he freezes at my words.

His eyes look pained and he leans forward until he is close enough to grasp my ankle.

"Jane, please. You need to believe me. I have never done this. I'd never-…"

"Why am I naked?" I whisper and he actually looks guilty.

"The…robe is wet. I…" he suddenly stands up and untucks his shirt out of his pants.

I watch frozen and fearful as he pulls it off and steps towards me. My eyes are drawn to the alabaster skin of his chest but I quickly look away as he gently places his dry shirt upon my bare knees. His fingers brush over my skin as he pulls his hand away and I swallow hard as I quickly reach for the shirt.

"You said we…" I murmur and he quickly nods.

"Yes."

"How can you see what I see?" I whisper and he averts his eyes shamefully. Then it finally clicks.

"You've been seeing my dreams? All these weeks?" my voice is trembling as I speak and I can see him curling his fingers into tight fists as I whisper the words.

"Do you cause them?"

His eyes snap down to mine, "No! I swear it, my dear-…"

"Turn around." I cut him off and he grits his teeth before he does as I say. I quickly cover myself with his shirt which reaches my thighs and then I stand on wobbly legs.

I shuffle backwards until I am pressed against the opposite wall and when he turns around I can see panic in his eyes.

"Jane-…"

"I don't trust you." I cut him off sharply but I am not sure of my words.

His face looks tormented, "Jane, don't be cruel."

"Cruel? I am being cruel? All this time, I've been having these maddening visions of my life…our fucking life and all this time…you…you knew. You knew and you never told me! You left me suffer alone-…"

"You think I do not suffer? I suffer from the mistrust in your eyes alone-…"

"My mistrust is nothing! I am going mad! Do you understand me? I cannot think straight anymore! I feel like I am left bereft in an endless sea without anyone to pull me back. And you suffer? How can you suffer when everything is your fault?" I am screaming by now and I can see that my words are having an effect on him.

"Indeed. My fault. My curse is causing this. But you…you've always tempted me. You were everything I couldn't have and everything I wanted to be. You knocked me off my high throne and made me a slave. A slave of your eyes. Why can't you see my torture? This is what she wants. This is what makes her happy. She has dug this seed into your mind so that you can no longer trust me. Please, don't make this mistake. I lo-…"

"Well, well. She speaks at last." Angelique's voice suddenly calls out of nowhere and I break the eye contact with Barnabas to look up. I cannot see her and I grit my teeth against this sick mind game of hers. I hate her. God, I hate her.

"Show yourself, you wench." Barnabas whispers and in a flash he is right in front of me, pressing me against the wall with his bare back.

Angelique chuckles and appears in front of the door in a swirl of crimson skirts.

"Where's your politeness, Barnabas? Oh right. Gone, along with your manhood." She snickers as she starts walking around.

Then she notices his shirt missing and her eyes narrow, "Have I interrupted something?" she asks and I gulp.

"Obviously." Barnabas answers for me and she scowls.

"I still don't get how you stand her. She's awfully whiney…and weak…and rather plain. Josette on the other hand-…"

"What do you want? Tell her that it was your doing." He spits at her and she blinks innocently.

"Whatever do you mean?"

I understand then, by the twitching of her mouth alone, that she is behind my last dream. She wanted to prove a point. She thinks I care about his sexual appetites? I do not. That's the least of my worries. I cannot have another breakdown like the last one. For God's sake, I had lost my voice for days.

"You deceitful little devil. Kill me and have it done for I'll never succumb to your will. Never, do you hear?" Barnabas growls at her and I place my hands upon his back. He stiffens under my touch.

Angelique tenses up and she takes a step forward, her eyes dark and glimmering with malice.

"You want to die? Very well." She clicks her fingers and a knife appears in her hand; a silver one, "I shall endeavor to show you that there are worse fates than death." She whispers in a strained voice before she starts approaching us, her eyes focused on us.

I try to push Barnabas out of the way but for some odd reason he cannot move. I can feel his body fighting against the silent spell but it's useless. She has him trapped against me and I myself cannot move.

"Barnabas." I whisper as my nails dig into his skin. He hisses and leans his head back for it's the only part he can move.

Angelique comes to a stop right in front of us, in front of him, and raises her hand to his cheek. He snarls and moves his head away and her eyes freeze up. They turn an icy blue and before I can blink she thrusts the knife into his stomach. He screams and I jump, my back hitting the wall as I do so but I cannot move otherwise.

Smoke rises from the wound as she pulls the dagger out only to strike his arm next. His blood splashes my face as she hits him again and again with the silver blade and I scream so loudly that even she looks up.

Our gazes lock and I focus all my anger and hate towards her, channeling it through my eyes and before she can do anything else, she is knocked right away from us. An invisible force throws her off and she lands on the other side of the room in a heap of limbs.

The spell is broken and Barnabas whirls around to face me with wide eyes. His eyes roam my form and I am too shocked to care that his shirt has risen dangerously up my thighs.

Did I…did I just do this? Did I throw her off?

What does that mean? Am I…am I…_Oh God._

Before I can move or let alone blink I can feel myself falling to the ground. Strong, bloodied arms catch me before I hit the floor.

'_**Witches don't look like anything. Witches are. Witches do.'**_

_**~Franny Billingsley, Chime**_

**End of chapter 10**

**A/N: Ahem…Still here? Really? Good! So, what did you think? Liked it, hated it? Please, let me know for I am anxious to know your thoughts about this turn of events. Please? Feedback is my bread and butter so…;o) Give me some love, people!**

**More as soon as I have some feedback.**

**Until then, loves!**

**Xxx Lina ;o)**


	12. Chapter 11

**A/N: Hello, my darlings! Thanks for still being here.**

**I want to thank: TinkerbellxO, Jay D. Moore, MissMisc3, dionne dance, Jandra1969, 88dragon06, ForeverACharmedOne, Gary the Snail x3, CharlieCats, missyclone, Makrciana, xxPaige23xx, PGAEmma and XantheXV. Thank you all for supporting this!**

**Song suggestion: **_**The Windmills of Your Mind**_**, by Dusty Springfield.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Chapter 11**

'_**Wound me not with thine eyes, but with thy tongue;**_

_**Use power with power and slay me not with art.'**_

_**~W. Shakespeare, Sonnets**_

I am staring at my hands like they are an alien part of me. I blink, but remain silent as I hear the last sounds of the wards coming up behind the locked door. My hands look the same…So, it mustn't have been them that did the deed. I eye my skin, expecting to see any cracks in it, like the witches in horror stories when their façade of normalcy and beauty is breaking, but my skin is the same pale skin I know. I blink again, trying out my vision and I watch as Barnabas stares at me with wide eyes. Am I spitting fire or something? My cheeks flush with the way he is looking at me. Like I am something that has dropped from the sky.

His hand is pressing a torn piece of my dirty robe against the slash on his stomach. His arm is already healing, but I am almost certain that the silver will leave a scar. I take a deep breath and scan my brain for any previous signs of…power in me. I recall none…Although…My eyes go wide as I remember that childhood event…that presence and-…

"You now what this means, don't you?" Barnabas' voice makes me look up at him. My throat goes dry at the way he is eyeing me; like I've suddenly become his strongest weapon. Suddenly, any thoughts I had flee my head.

"No, I don't, Barnabas. Would you care to enlighten me?" I ask and he smirks with gleeful eyes.

"You can be the key to get us out of here." He responds with pride and I blink in confusion.

"What…Now you think I am a witch?' I ask incredulously and I shake my head.

"Most definitely." He nods.

"And you think that I can magically conjure up my hidden powers and defeat Angelique? You're insane." I whisper, "As far as I know that could have been her spell backfiring at her."

Barnabas blinks, "Then why did she leave like that? Why not make a comment? Why not be her rude self?"

"I don't know!" I almost yell, "But I am not what you think! I have never had any sort of powers…I…Stop looking at me like that!" I snap and he purses his lips as he stares at me.

"Jane-…"

"I thought you despise witchcraft. What changed? Am I not some devil that needs to be exorcised or something?" my voice is shaking and my hands are as well, "Am I not an evil being that needs to be burned at the stake?"

This is too much. I don't know what is true or false anymore. I don't know who to believe.

"Now it is you…And you could never be evil." He murmurs and I falter.

"It means nothing. Please, forget it." I whisper in a barely audible voice, "I am nothing special."

He tenses up, "Don't say that."

"Then stop having hope about something that is absurd! Me? A witch? Now way. All my life I have been absolutely ordinary. Nothing will change."

"Then how do you explain what happened?" he asks in a challenging voice, his face a fierce snarl.

I falter, "I cannot explain it. Why all things need an explanation? Why can't we leave things as they are?" I ask desperately.

"Because nothing happens without purpose in life!" he replies calmly.

"My life has been without a purpose." I fire with irk and only now do I realize that it is the first personal comment I have ever made in his presence. He looks crestfallen.

"Jane, your life is a miracle." He murmurs quietly and I look up.

"Why because of the bond? Because of your misguided notion that you…What? Love me?" I ask sharply, my voice as cutting as that silver knife Angelique used to cut his skin with.

He flinches and his eyes darken, "Misguided? Does our past seem misguided to you?"

"_Our_ past? _We_ don't have a past!" I cry softly.

He stands up, "We don't? What are the dreams then?"

"It's not _my_ past, Barnabas!" I stand as well, "It's the past of you and Jane Wald. A woman whom I barely know-…"

"It is you!" He snaps at me.

"How can you be so sure?" I ask as I storm up to him, my fists clenched and I wince as my still healing hand causes me to stiffen from the pangs of pain.

"Because I have feelings for you-…"

"What kind of feelings? Protection or love?" I ask and he looks down at me as if seeing me for the first time.

"Both." He answers and I shake my head.

"No, what you feel for this Jane is possessiveness. Because how can you love me when you don't know me?"

His hand drops from his stomach and he stares at me, "I just can."

"You don't. You simply want to think that you do. You don't even know me. I am not that woman…I am not the servant girl who-…"

"You were not my servant!" he cuts me off and his tone causes me to jump. His eyes soften and he reaches out to touch my cheek. His cold hand causes me to shudder.

"You were my life-…"

"Stop." I step back and shake my head, "I don't know what to think. How am I certain that what I saw and what I will surely see is true? How can I know for certain that this is not just some hallucinations from my part?" I hug myself and he frowns.

"Hallucinations?"

"Yes…I already know my mind is slipping away from me. My sanity…I don't have a strong hold of my sanity. This place will haunt me for all time. I won't be able to escape it. I feel tired, scarred…I feel used." I admit my feelings for the first time and it feels good when he looks wounded. Good. So far I am the only one who has been hurting. My life is the one that's been turned upside down.

"You think I would ever scramble your mind like that on purpose? Why?" he asks me harshly, his fists clenched.

"Because of the bond-…"

"The bond? You think the bond would work if you were in any way unwilling?" his eyes are scanning me up and down. What does he think he'll find?

"You make it sound like it's magical-…"

"It is magical! It is a spell. Vampires are supernatural creatures. How do you think I'd be able to compel Angelique to forget you if I was not even a little bit magical myself?"

His questions are driving me insane. They are confusing me even more. My head starts pounding from all the tension.

"I do not know!" I cry, "How can I know that you are not compelling me too? How do I know that you're not using that tool on me?"

He takes a step back, "You just have to trust me on that. I told you that the bond eliminates any kind of control I might had on you-…"

"I do not know that." I cut him off.

"You must know _something_!" he spats with exasperated sarcasm and I freeze. Now I am the one to blame?

"You're mistaken, Mr. Collins. I know nothing. Like I didn't know anything that first day I met you." I whisper, "Thank you for ruining my boring little life."

"How can you say that? You know-…" he starts quietly, but I cut him off.

"I am not that Jane!" I scream at him hoarsely, "I would not kill myself for any man!"

"You didn't die because of me!" he barks at me.

"Stop using that word! It's not me! I am not her! I just look like her! I don't want to remember your past because it is not my own! I am tired of paying for your sins!" My voice is barely my own as I scream at him and he looks shocked at my outburst.

I take deep, calming breaths, "I am not her and I am no witch. I am just an accountant with a fucking borrowed cat and an angry landlady. I have nothing. Do you hear me? Nothing."

Abruptly I turn away from him and slide down the wall until I am hugging my knees. I block him out.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

"_I would very much like it if you kept your eyes open while we are discussing this, dear." The female voice causes me to open my eyes with a start. I turn and look at the redhead that is sitting next to me. I blink. It's the doctor again…Julia, right?_

_I take a look around and I realize that I am back in her office. The dream is a riveting change from the usual old dreams. It might do me good not to be with him in my dreams…or visions or whatever._

"_Good." Her voice brings my attention back to her. At least in the future it is still me. The Jane I know well._

"_Now, would you care to tell me three words that describe you?" she asks softly and I frown. _

"_Um…remind me why are we doing this?"_

_She looks a bit let down at my question, "Dear, I told you. I just want to help you express whatever is inside you. That way, it will release whatever you have locked in you…You know everyone is really excited to see those powers that will make you stronger."_

"_My powers?"_

"_Yes." She nods._

"_What if I don't have them?"_

"_Well, you just need to know yourself for starters. Then we will take it from there. Now, will you give those three words?" she cocks her head to the side and I decide to go along with this._

"_Okay…" I look away from her and swallow hard._

"_Don't think too much about it." She suggests softly and I nod absently._

"_Silent…hesitant…invisible." I murmur without much thought and my eyes widen when I realize how I just described myself. Pathetic._

"_Very good…Why do you think you're invisible?" she asks and I watch out of the corner of my eye as she takes a sip from what looks like whiskey._

_I scowl at the sight of the drink. I hate whiskey._

"_I just know it."_

"_Have you tried to be?"_

_I falter, "No…" She nods, but then I close my eyes in surrender, "Yes." I admit and her eyes snap up to me._

"_Why?"_

"_I am not sure."_

"_Hmm. Perhaps it gave you the feeling of power you never had?" she offers and I blink._

"_You mean that I am weak."_

"_I mean that you wanted to prove to yourself that you had the power of becoming invisible." She points out._

"_Maybe…"_

"_Talk to me about your parents." She changes topic._

"_You want words again?"_

_ I don't know why I am so at ease in her presence. She smiles and nods._

"_Hmm."_

"_Kind, loving…stifling." I reply and she frowns._

"_Why stifling?"_

"_Parents do that…in their attempt to protect their children from failure." I shrug quietly._

"_Did you ever fail them?" she asks and I pause._

_Did I?_

"_I always had great grades…But I think I did."_

"_Why?"_

"_I was alone."_

"_Why?"_

_I frown, "People didn't like me."_

"_Why, dear?" Julia's voice is firm. She wants me to answer that._

"_I was too serious for their tastes…I never did anything bad…At school I was always proper…I never got scolded by a teacher…I was a nerd." I smirk a bit and she laughs._

"_What about outside of school?"_

_I take a deep breath, "I had a friend…but she died."_

"_How?"_

"_Car accident. Her head was severed from her neck." I gulp as I say it out loud. I remember Kate. She was beautiful...and kind._

"_I am sorry about that."_

"_What about sexual relationships?"_

_My cheeks flush, "I had none…"_

"_No boyfriends?"_

"_One. He didn't like my cooking." I say and she smiles a bit._

"_What do you think of your visions?" she asks and I stiffen up. So I still have them in the future? God, why?_

"_They are confusing."_

"_I would think that they'd be illuminating." She argues._

"_They are not." I shake my head._

"_Will you describe me your most recent vision?" she questions and I frown hard._

"_I…"_

_What was my latest vision? I have no idea. This is a dream anyway. I choose the truth._

"_I don't remember." I whisper._

_Julia pauses and takes another sip of her drink, "Are you ready to talk about your reluctance to leave the mansion?" she asks instead and I stiffen._

_My what? She means to say that I…live here? All the time? Jesus._

"_Um…reluctance?" I voice as I turn to look at her and she nods._

"_Yes…Are you afraid of walking outside on your own?"_

"_You've been monitoring my moves?" I blurt and she smiles softly, her red painted lips parting to show her white teeth._

"_Dear, you're in your room all day…Why don't you take strolls in the gardens at least? A little sunlight will do you good."_

"_Sunlight?"_

"_Hmm…Are you perhaps afraid that it will hurt him?" she asks with her head tilted to the side a bit._

"_Him?"_

"_Barnabas. He follows you everywhere, doesn't he?" she states and I blink._

_He does? I wouldn't know, lady…This is a dream._

"_Um…"_

"_Do you want him to?"_

"_Do I want him to what?" I ask a bit more harshly than I want to._

"_To follow you around?" she clarifies and I frown again._

"_Does he?"_

"_That's not an answer." She says amused._

"_I don't know how to answer that." I murmur._

_She clears her throat, "I'll rephrase then. Does it feel good to have him worry about you all the time?"_

"_Good? I don't like to be an inconvenience to people…"_

"_That's not an answer."_

"_I don't understand the question." I almost snap._

_How has this conversation arrived here?_

"_Jane, here's what I think. I think it gives you a feeling of power to have him trail you everywhere. And I think that is because of your fear of losing him."_

"_That's ridiculous." I mutter._

"_Is it? What if he never appeared by your side ever again?"_

"_What?" I look at her with confusion._

"_What if he chose to leave you? I know that the bond won't let him to…" she suddenly stands and comes over to my seat. Her hand pushes my top away and her eyes zero on the top of my left breast._

_I look down and freeze when I see it._

"_What?" I slap her hand away and tug the neckline away so that I can see my skin better. Just above the lining of my bra there are two identical bite marks…They look odd…like they are burned upon my skin. My eyes widen._

"_You didn't remember that?" She asks and I can sense a tinge of worry in her voice._

"_I…" I have no words. Does this mean that by this point the bond is complete? That means that…_

_I flush fifty shades of red and fix my top, "Oh…I remember, yes." I lie because I don't. But she doesn't need to know that. There is no reason for her to think me more insane than she already does._

_She takes a step back, "Because of the bond, he cannot abandon you…"_

"_Abandon?" I ask with furrowed brows and she shakes her head._

"_Not that he would ever want to." She smiles reassuringly, "But I think you should re-establish your freedom. You have to take strolls on your own, you have to leave the mansion at some point. You have to live without depending on him. You are no longer in that hole." She says gently and I take a deep breath._

"_I hate it when others point out the proper direction for me. It makes me feel incompetent." I breathe out softly and she smiles with satisfaction._

"_Good. You need to express your feelings." She says cheerily and I grimace at her back as she turns to sit back down. Suddenly, the marks upon my breast start to tingle. I stiffen as I hear approaching footsteps._

"_How are the pills helping you? Are you sleeping properly?" she asks as she sits down and I blink, choosing to ignore the approaching footsteps._

"_Um…sure." Again another lie, for I don't know if they are. _

"_Great." She nods and then there is a knock on the door._

"_Come in." She rolls her eyes and I realize why once the door opens and Barnabas enters. There is another woman who is lingering at the threshold and I frown as her eyes immediately fall on me. She is younger…Probably younger than me. Her skin is clear, her hair reaches the tips of her shoulders and her eyes are the colour of the sea. She is beautiful and awfully familiar…Have I seen her before?_

_I don't have time to give that much thought because Barnabas shuts the door right before giving her a small, polite smile. He then turns to us._

"_Forgive the intrusion, but I…need…" He trails off as he eyes me and Julia with hesitation._

"_The freezer is right there, Barnabas. You have two hands. Use them." Julia tells him and he walks over to us, well me, with the clear intention of touching me. I know that. _

"_Jane." He murmurs as he takes my hand and rubs it between his own, before he raises it to his lips. He kisses it and the tingling upon my breast gets stronger._

_I try hard not to grasp._

_Julia groans and stands up, walking to the small freezer herself while he is preoccupied with me. His eyes are alight with emotions as he looks at me and when he pulls his mouth away from my skin I can see that he does so with great reluctance._

"_Does it hurt? Are you sore-…"_

"_You're intruding on our session, Barnabas. Take it and go." Julia cuts him off and he turns to her, his eyes moving away from my own confused gaze to look at her._

"_My apologies, doctor. But I need to feed before I take Victoria to the train station." He says and she frowns. I do so too._

_Right…Victoria._

"_She is leaving."_

"_Indeed."_

"_Fine. Then better get on with it." She hands him something and then I can see the blood bag. I gasp because I understand why she had taken my blood in the last dream. That's my blood. I want to be sick suddenly…Why am I so nauseous?_

_I clutch at my stomach the moment he lets go of my hand and I can only watch as he turns from us and walks to a shadowed corner to drink. I don't know what it is, but I can hear the sounds of him as he takes my blood and the nausea gets even more pronounced._

_Julia sighs and shakes her head before she sits down again and looks at me._

"_Here's another box. Try not to take them every day though…Just get one whenever you feel anxiety or…insomnia." She says as she hands me a box of Trazodone. I take it and look at it with wide eyes. She gives me antidepressants? _

_Do these people think I am…What? Depressed? Suicidal?_

"_Will you remember that for me?" she asks and I blink before I nod, "Good."_

"_Will these have an effect on him?" I ask as I nod towards Barnabas and she shakes her head._

"_No…None of the medication you might take will hurt him." She smiles, "No worries."_

_I nod and rub my stomach a bit. She notices._

"_Are you nauseous? That might be a side effect. Perhaps you should give me the pills and I should monitor the dosage." She outstretches her hand and I immediately hand it over. I want nothing to do with antidepressants._

"_Fine by me." I murmur and she frowns._

"_Are you sure you're alright?"_

_I nod again._

"_I told you not to give them to her. Simple sleep pills would-…"_

"_Barnabas. Don't talk of things you do not know." Julia cuts him off and I look up at him._

_He looks angry, "Perhaps you ought to join us, Jane. Fresh air will do you good-…"_

"_It's about to rain." Julia points out and he groans softly._

"_Then good for me, yes?"_

"_Please stop. Both of you." I suddenly whisper as I stand up. Both turn to look at me with surprise._

"_Jane?"_

_I get dizzy though and I am glad when I feel something pulling me back from the room._

_I am waking up. Finally._

_I am pulled out of the dream and the air starts whirling around me. I gasp, for I feel the all consuming emptiness beneath my body as I fall. I cry out because I should have woken up by now. But no. I keep falling and falling until I land on something hard and cold. I groan and turn on my back. The side of my face feels sore from the impact and I reach up to rub at the soreness. I gasp when I feel it swollen._

"_Jesus…" I groan and open my eyes. I am in a bright lighted room…It looks like a cellar. Odd._

_I sit up and notice the marble floor underneath me. As my eyes scan the area I notice my dark blue dress. From the things around me and the very obvious image of my stockings it seems that I am back in another dream…Centuries back._

"_Not again." I breathe and shake my head._

"_Ah! Good. There you are! Did you fall? God, how ungraceful can you be?" A familiar voice snaps from the cellar door and I look up._

_Angelique stands in there in a pinstriped dress. Her hair is pulled back from her face and the white clean and crisp apron is almost blinding._

"_Hello?" She waves her hand in front of my face, "Anyone there? Um, your father said you'd help…He said you need the money?" she takes a step closer, "But from the looks of it, you've already started being clumsy…Come with me." She commands and I quickly stand up. My cheek throbs from my fall, but I follow her out of the cellar._

"_Take these." She thrusts a few bottles in my hands, "You can go fill the glasses. Lady Collins will be mad if she sees that the drinks are not served yet. Hurry up!" she hisses and I frown._

_Lady Collins? _

_As we climb a flight of stairs, I realize that we are in Collinwood. I falter._

"_I don't have all day, you know." Angelique's eyes are roaming my form with distaste and I take a reflexive step back. She smirks._

"_You really are like a small fish, aren't you? A small fish in the big wide open ocean. I hope you're not too careless. This is expensive china." She gestures towards the large table that is lined with crystal glasses and I pause as we enter the big room._

_What in hell? Am I a part of the household now?_

"_Start with the drinks. Don't wander or I'll have to make a complaint about you…" Angelique grins, "Your cheek's turning purple by the way." She says before she disappears and I scowl._

_Another maid walks in, but she smiles at me as she sets another tray of glasses on the table. _

_A few men are rearranging the curtains and they are opening the large French doors while I stand here like an idiot._

_I groan and place the bottles on the table. What on earth am I supposed to do? I want to wake up before I do or say something to that witch. I briefly wonder if this is after or before she finds out about me and Barnabas. I wipe my sweaty palms upon my dress and I realize that I am wearing no apron. There is a spare one on the table in front of me though._

_I glance around me and in the distance I can see an elegant lady conversing with one of the staff who carries large pots of flowers in the large hall. _

_I place my hand against my sore cheek and decide to get on with the damn drinks until I wake up._

_I grab the first one and try to uncork it…No such luck. I put more force and groan._

"_Is there glue on them? I don't need this right now…" I mutter as I try harder. Nothing._

"_You need to twist from the shoulder a bit." The smooth voice causes me to jump._

_I turn my head and notice him behind me. He has his hands behind his back and he is smiling with amusement. His clothes match the colour of his brown eyes and the cold trimming around the cuffs and neck is almost blinding under the light of the intricate chandelier. A lacy cravat is wrapped around his neck and the knot ends near his throat, falling underneath his vest in complicated little waves._

_I am shocked when he cocks his head to the side and narrows his eyes._

"_You are the help for the evening, yes?" he asks quietly and I quickly nod, "Alright. Like I said, you need to twist the cork a bit before it opens." He repeats and I suddenly realize that he has probably never seen me before. I am speechless. I don't know how to act around him now. What do I say? And what if I speak and say something that will change the course of things?_

_Damn. I hate my life…and dreams._

_I turn my back on him and do as he says. The bottle opens with a pop. My eyes widen. I put it on the table, but then I feel something brushing my hand._

"_You might want to wear this." _

_I turn and in his hand he is holding an apron; the one that had been on the table a moment ago._

_I take it and nod without a word._

_He watches me as I open the other bottles as well and I feel out of place and very conscious of that bruise on my face._

"_I haven't seen you here before…May I ask your name?" he murmurs quietly as he steps next to me and uncorks the last bottle. _

_I look up. Why on earth is he talking to me? Am I not supposed to be a servant?_

"_Miss?" He jolts me out of my thoughts and I blink._

"_Jane…Wald." I say at last and he smiles._

"_Captain Wald's daughter?" he seems surprised and I nod, "Your father is-…"_

"_Will you hurry up? We-…Master." Angelique appears and I look at her. _

_Barnabas eyes her before he steps back, "Angelique, my mother needs you." He tells her quietly and she quickly bows her head before she walks towards the woman I had noticed earlier._

_My heart starts thundering in my chest because he is looking at me again. He notices my face._

"_What's wrong with your cheek?" he asks and I shrug._

"_I suppose I am clumsy." I say softly and he smiles before he laughs a bit._

"_Well, you should be more careful, Miss." He grins at me and then swiftly walks away and towards his mother._

_I blink after him and smile a bit before I turn my attention back to the glasses and bottles._

_Loud voices from afar make me look up and I see an older woman, probably in her fifties, dragging a young girl with her._

"_Come! I shall make an example of you." She hisses and I frown as they brush by me._

_The girl is wiggling and trying to escape, but the woman's hold is firm and unyielding. I feel bad for the frail little thing because I can already sense what has happened._

"_Agatha? What is the meaning of this? Our guests will be here soon." Lady Collins says and her son is standing next to her and looking…at me._

_When our eyes lock he averts his gaze with a soft smirk. I flush._

"_I just caught this girl stealing from our kitchens-…"_

"_I did not-…"_

"_Silence!" The older maid who looks more like a housekeeper than a servant snaps, but the girl's eyes are immediately upon Barnabas._

"_Young Master, I did not-…" she cries, but a sharp slap from the other woman manages to shut her up._

_I gasp and I can see Barnabas lurching forward, "Mrs. Kipling! What behaviour is this? Let her talk for Heaven's sake." He grasps the girl's hand and pulls her to his side before he produces a handkerchief from his pocket and hands it to her._

"_Explain what happened." He commands gently and the girl wipes her eyes and cheeks before she nods._

"_Master-…"_

"_Agatha, I wish to hear both parties." He cuts her off and I smile._

_I feel someone coming closer and I hadn't realized that Angelique had walked away from them._

"_Charming, yes? The good Master of Collinwood, always taking the side of the weaker ones." She breathes and I almost gasp at how close she is, "Do you think it's real? Or is it just an act of superiority?" She is smirking and I want to wipe that smirk off her face. Not everyone is as cruel and mean as her._

"_You're very quiet. Why, you seemed quite chatty a little while ago." She mutters and my eyes widen. Is she insane?_

_The voices of the girl and Barnabas' gentle coaxing sound far away, for I only notice her and how dangerously close she is. My skin crawls at her close proximity. I want to hurt her…I really do. What if I did so? Right now? That would save us a lot of trouble…Can she even be killed now? Is she as strong as she is in the future?_

"_You're not denying it, are you? I wouldn't look for work here if I were you. We are full." She says in an eerily quiet voice and my own eyes narrow, mirroring her own._

"_I don't think I asked for your opinion." I say as I abruptly turn and face the table._

_I jerkily tie the apron around my waist and she scoffs before she walks away._

"_Laide petite chose." She mutters and I can feel my eyes literally flashing with fire and hate. I stare at the glasses in front of me and grit my teeth. Sadly for her ,I know a little bit of French._

_I clench my hands and I idly feel my palms screaming in protest as my nails dig into my skin. I groan and narrow my eyes hard as my breathing hitches and my heart rate speeds up. I can feel my teeth gritting together because even in my dreams or visions or whatever they are, she is still there; ruining everything._

_I don't know how or why, but suddenly one of the crystal glasses bursts into pieces right in front of me. I cry out and stumble back as jagged pieces of glass enter the skin of my face and hands. I yell as I fall on the floor, but I don't care that much because the glass that just broke into a million little pieces is the one I had been staring at. It happened again._

_oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo_

I wake up with a small groan and open my eyes. I find out with shock that my head is resting upon Barnabas' lap. One of his hands is in my hair and the other one is absently tracing the inside of my wrist.

I tense up a bit because I realize that I spoke so harshly to him a few hours ago. He notices me awake and smiles softly.

"Want me to go away?" he murmurs and I swallow thickly before I shake my head.

"No…" I mutter and his mouth twitches. I know he just saw the same thing I did. That proves his point about me being…_that_ kind of creature and I hate it.

As I feel the cold air of the cell hitting my skin I realize that I am only in his shirt still. I flush, but try to ignore it.

"You saw." I murmur and he nods.

"Both?" I ask and he frowns.

"Both?"

"I dreamed twice…"

He frowns and I can see that it unsettles him, "I don't understand…"

Suddenly, I sit up and blink, "I see…Never mind." I shake my head and his frown deepens.

His hand cups my cheek, forcing me to look at him and I blink, "Jane…You do see only flashes of the past, yes?" he asks and I gulp.

"Not really. I see the future too." I whisper shakily and he freezes.

I guess he doesn't know everything after all. I don't know if I should feel glad or not…As I stare into his upset eyes I realize that I shouldn't feel glad because the only one who is getting more confused and twisted is me. Not him.

**End of chapter 11**

**Author's note: Thank you for reading! I had meant to include more scenes in this chap, but it is already long so…**

**Please review before you go! I really want your thoughts! What do you think will happen now with Jane's new found abilities? Hmm? Let me know your thoughts and ideas!**

***_Laide petite chose_ means _ugly little thing_ in French. **

**Also, trazedone is an antideppressant and it is used for cases of depression, insomnia and other mental illnesses.***

**Until next time, dears!**

**Xxx Lina ;o)**


	13. Chapter 12

**A/N: Hello, loves! Welcome back. I know some of you were expecting an update on **_**Age of Innocence**_**, but I had to write this first. Something important happens in this chapter…You shall see what if you keep reading.**

**So, a huge thank you to: Jandra1969, ForeverACharmedOne, PGAEmma, XantheXV, JohnnyDeppLover44, missyclone, MissMisc3, dionne dance, CharlieCats and TinkerbellxO. Thanks to you I keep writing this! You are all wonderful! Keep your comments coming.**

***This chapter is dedicated to Jandra1969. I owe it to her. :D***

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows…Obviously.**

* * *

**Chapter 12**

_**Some say the world will end in fire,  
Some say in ice.  
From what I've tasted of desire  
I hold with those who favor fire.  
But if it had to perish twice,  
I think I know enough of hate  
To say that for destruction ice  
Is also great  
And would suffice.**_

_**~Robert frost, Fire and Ice**_

The black robe falls upon my lap as if appearing out of nowhere and I startle. I open my eyes and my brown gaze locks with Angelique's ice blue eyes. She is gazing down at me oddly, her features strangely relaxed and her posture straight. I quickly press my back against the cold wall behind me. My eyes break the eye contact with her and roam the room with a feeling of desperation. When I don't find him anywhere I turn and look back at her.

"Where is he?" I say hoarsely, my voice barely my own. I feel too tired, too weak. All I want is to fall asleep, but I cannot. I am too alert to sleep.

"Do not fear, my dear. I decided to offer you some hospitality. He is cleaning himself. I advise you to stand up and follow me if you want the same…_little witch_." Her mouth twists in a wide awful grin and I shiver.

"I am no witch." I hiss.

"Of course not. You are so damn weak to be one. Come along. I do not have all day." She turns on her heels and moves to the open door.

I somehow hesitate. I do not want to get out of the room. Not when I am alone and he is nowhere to be found. I stand on shaky legs and look around me.

Pathetic. I cannot believe that I am actually so weak. But I am. I have no strength. I do not want to go with her. I don't trust her. I look down upon myself and flush when I realize that I am still in Barnabas' shirt.

"Coming? You don't want me to change my mind." She calls and I look up at her.

She is staring at me hard, her lips pursed in an unsavoury twist. I gulp. I cannot fathom her facial expression. It is still as if she's above me, but there is something peculiar in her gaze. As if apprehension. My eyes widen. She does not fear me, does she? The thought is ludicrous. She has no reason to…Or does she?

"Fine." She abruptly turns, ready to shut the door, and I release an embarrassing yelp before I leap forward.

"No, no!" I gasp and she smirks.

"Hurry then." She hisses and I follow her out of the room. As soon as I am out and my eyes take in the darkened corridor I feel something around my wrist. I gasp and look down at it. Nothing is visible on my wrist, but I can feel heavy cold metal around my skin. I swallow thickly as she grabs my hand and turns it upside down. Her eyes stare hard at my inner wrist and I stop breathing for a moment.

"What a saint you are. But these aren't fresh." She informs me and I lick my dry lips as she settles her gaze upon my face, "Careful, Jane. You wouldn't want a very weak vampire by your side." She lets go of my wrist and turns around. An unseen force pulls me forward as she starts walking down the corridor.

"But what a dull way to satisfy him. Feeding him from your hand like he is a dog. How debasing for a Collins." She turns to eye me from over her shoulder and I scowl, my eyes connecting with the side of her face in a fierce glare.

"Clearly you have no idea how to meddle with a vampire. Pity for you." She chuckles and her sick words cause me to shudder in disgust.

As we turn the corner, two figures appear. One of them is wrapped in irons and I stiffen when Barnabas' eyes connect with mine. He looks awfully unsettled when his eyes spot me. He starts moving towards me, but the man behind him clamps a hand over his shoulder. He stiffens and as soon as I see the man's face and hands I cry out.

Angelique stops to look at me and then she smiles, "What's the matter, darling? Never seen a werewolf before?" her eyes gaze at the man…_creature,_ whatever he is with fondness and I want to vomit when I realize the reason behind the fear in Barnabas' gaze. He slowly shakes his head at me and his eyes soften as he is pushed forward by the _thing_. I want to cry when I see the hairy sharp, claw like fingers that are clutching Barnabas' shoulder.

I watch them as they head back to the cell and I turn to look at Angelique. She's smiling.

"Do not worry. He's as obedient as a lapdog...when _I_ am giving the orders. Come along." She purrs, but my wish to take a bath is long diminished. I want to go back. I want to see if he will be left alone.

The iron around my wrist propels me forward though and I can do nothing more but follow. I carry on walking with my heart to my stomach.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

I shrug on the robe and tie the belt tightly around my waist. I frown when I feel my hipbones digging into my palms as I check my body. I am so thin. I have always been thin, but this not good…Not healthy. I take a tremulous breath in and when the door behind me slams open I whirl around to face Angelique.

She nods her head at me and steps closer to me, "Good. Better?" She waves a hand and a low stool suddenly appears. I jump and she laughs. If I didn't hate her it would have been charming.

"Sit." She conjures a brush and tries to hand it to me, but I want nothing from her. Her jovial expression does not falter and she walks towards me. When I realize her intention I try to stand up but her cold hand is like vice upon my shoulder. I settle back down as she starts brushing my awfully tangled hair. I shudder in repulsion.

"I am not that bad, Jane…In fact I have to propose something that will be to your benefit." She tells me and I frown.

"Nothing you can give me can be good if you keep us locked in here." I say and she pauses, her fingers tightening around my shoulder almost painfully.

"_Us_?" she echoes and I blink. Yes, I did say us. And I meant it.

"You care for him…but does he?"

"Of course."

"You're so certain." She murmurs as she resumes brushing my hair roughly. I wince, but try to remain still.

"I try to be."

"What if I told you that I could give you your freedom? For an exchange of course." She asks me quietly and I cock an eyebrow.

"Describe freedom." I say.

"I could let you go…if you disowned him." She tells me and I blink rapidly before I start laughing. She walks around me so she is in front of me. Her glare is palpable in the air around us.

"Amusing am I?" She hisses.

I try to calm down, "Disown? Now that's a proof of how old you are." The words fly out of my mouth before I can censor them and her eyes darken.

"But you understood what I mean."

"How can I disown something that isn't mine?" I ask and she pauses, her eyes widening minutely. I frown at the change in her gaze…It is as if she knows something that I do not.

"Very well…" she licks her lips and cocks her head to the side, "Let me enhance my offer." She takes a step closer, "I could teach you."

"Teach me what?" I ask harshly and she smiles.

"To be a witch."

I startle and take a deep breath, "I do not wish to be a witch. And certainly not under your tutelage." I snap and her expression doesn't change. She was expecting that reply. What scares me the most is that she knows that I have some kind of power…no matter how small that might be, and she wants to use it against me. I do not trust her.

"Fine…Think about it. I doubt that you can stand to remain the weakling that you are now." She informs me as she straightens. I follow her with my eyes as she steps back.

"I fear you are as weak as I am." I say with barely composed confidence.

"What do you mean?" She asks me sweetly, but I can sense the dangerous tinge in the question. I do not stop though.

"If you are desperate enough to set me free and train me, then you really are lost in him. Pity he doesn't feel the same."

Blood and spittle flies out of my mouth as she backhands me and I place my hand over my mouth in shock. Blood stains my palm and fingers and I look up at her, suddenly regretting my timing, but not my words.

"Your tongue runs ahead of you. Don't make me cut it off. I doubt he will like you without one." She hisses down at me and then steps back, "Grooming time is over." She points her hand at me and no matter how hard I want it no speck of magic pulses out of me.

I allow her to drag me out of the old bathroom like a ragdoll…And I hate myself for it.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

I am thrust inside the cell and somehow, miraculously almost, I collide with Barnabas' solid chest and not the hard unforgiving ground. My body can't take another bruise or cut and my face is already throbbing from that smack.

Barnabas growls as the door is locked and warded and his arms are tight around me, pulling me closer to his body. He smells of plain soap, but the smell is grounding. As I think over Angelique's proposition I nod with clarity. I could never do as she wanted; I could never let him in her clutches. She obvious knows that our special bond is threatening to her. Why else would she offer me my freedom?

I snort and Barnabas' hand is upon my red cheek.

"What's this?" He murmurs as his cold fingers trace over the imprint left on my skin.

I shake my head, "I let my tongue run ahead of me." I tell him as I pull back.

His eyes widen as he notices the tiny drops of blood at the corner of my mouth.

He snarls, but before he can have time to question me I shake my head and pull back. His hand closes around my arm and my eyes are suddenly drawn to the long thick scar on his stomach. His shirt is still unbuttoned from his quick wash. Her attack has left its mark upon his marble skin. I look down at my own body. I have scars too.

"Jane, talk to me. What did you tell her?" He asks me and I shake my head as I look up at him.

"I think I offended her." I tell him and for some unknown reason his mouth curls into a tiny smile.

"You?" He murmurs with disbelief and I blink at the familiarity in his tone. He seems like he knows me well.

"Yes…Apparently, I have a little power after all." I say and his eyes widen and glimmer with glee.

"I told you-…'

"I meant that she fears me. I don't know why. And I have no actual powers, Barnabas." I whisper and at the sound of his name he steps closer.

"Yes, you do." He informs me with such reassurance that I want to cry and smile at the same time.

I sigh, but I am too tired to argue with him, "What happened with him…? Did he…?" I trail off and his eyes darken at the mention of the werewolf.

"Nothing happened." He mutters and gently pulls me down to the ground. He sits down and pulls me close, his fingers gentle around my wrist.

"Have you seen him before?" I ask with a little bit of dread.

"Never." He shakes his head and I gulp.

"Can he hurt you?" I whisper and his eyes flash with something.

"He can kill me…if I don't kill him first." His mouth twitches and I wonder if he can see the worry and fear in my eyes.

"Oh. That's reassuring." I mutter and he chuckles a bit as he gently pulls me to his chest, "May I?" He murmurs and I swallow hard before I wordlessly lay my head on his cool chest. His breath catches as I do so and as I wind an arm around his middle I feel a sense of peace taking over me. My body feels heavy, but despite the coldness of his skin I feel warmth spreading from the tight knot in my belly to the rest of my insides. I breathe in quietly, my nostrils filled with his scent and I close my eyes for a moment.

"Jane," he starts as he presses his chin at the top of my head, "Will you tell me about the dreams?" He whispers and I open my eyes for a moment, but I don't know how to answer that.

"Maybe that's what they are…Dreams. They have no consequence." I reply and he sighs, clearly disagreeing as he takes hold of my hand and pulls it up towards his mouth. I try not to appear startled when he inhales the scent of my skin and I manage not to flush when he nuzzles my palm.

The rhythmic movement of his nose as he runs it up and down my palm lulls me into sleep and I smile.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_I gasp as something tugs and pulls at my waist. My breath leaves me in tiny short gasps and I scan the room around me with wide, alert eyes. I freeze._

_I am back in the past. The room around me is opulent; with lavish red curtains, expensive mahogany furniture and a large pianoforte at the other side. The French doors are wide open and moonlight is bathing the vast room in its soft light._

_Hands on my back cause me to blink and I turn around to look at the person behind me. I frown because I do not recognize the woman who is fumbling with something at my lower back. Another painful pull reminds me of my lack of breathing and I blink as I place my hands on my corseted waist._

"_Just a moment, Miss. We need to make it tight and proper. It's the latest fashion." The woman tells me in a thick accent and I know immediately that she's foreign._

"_Um…" I trail off and nod sharply. She gives one last tug and I groan as I am propelled backwards by the severe pull._

_How can women breathe with this thing?_

"_All done." she informs me, "I am going to get you your shoes and you'll be ready, madam." She pulls away and I crane my neck._

_I watch her leave and I frown. I am by now familiar of my surroundings. _

_Collinwood._

_I swallow hard and take a step forward, towards the balcony. I pause and take a deep breath as I let the candlelight bathe me in its peaceful light. Footsteps from behind me alert me of someone's approach and I tense up._

_Warm hands settle upon my hips and a male body presses against me from behind. Hot breath parts the hair at the nape of my neck and then a hand pushes my strands behind my ear and off my shoulder._

"_Burgundy suits you." Barnabas' voice is soft and hoarse, and smooth at the same time and I briefly close my eyes, basking in its intimacy._

_Lips upon my neck leave burning scars behind and I anchor myself by holding onto the arm that is wrapped around my waist. My fingers trail over the intricate design of his coat and I can hear him as he takes a deep breath._

"_Diminish the light." He breathes and my eyes snap wide open._

"_What?"_

_He chuckles against my skin and his tongue laves at my pulse spot before he replies, "Fear not. She won't be back. I sent her away." He murmurs and I realize that he is talking about the seamstress._

_I gulp and step forward, ready to do as he pleases, but he holds me fast._

"_No…You know how." He breathes as he trails his lips up to my ear, "I like watching you practice." He tells me huskily and I frown._

"_Practice?"_

"_Hmm." He grins against my skin, "It's enthralling. Mesmerising. Seductive." His voice is heavy with emotions that I cannot bear at the moment and I try hard to understand the meaning behind his words._

_Suddenly, I am reminded of my conversation with Angelique._

_Oh, my God. He means that I can…_

_My eyes settle upon the closest candle and I stare at it. I feel nothing special running through me, no stimulating current that would belie my initial thought of being utterly useless to anything that has to do with magic. Only my stomach is twisted into a thousand knots because of his close proximity._

_I close my eyes briefly, leaning closer to him out of reflex and he inhales sharply, his lips gently brushing my cheek in reverence. Taking a deep breath, I open my eyes and look at the candle with intensity before I slowly lift my hand. I stretch my fingers and wiggle them a bit. I am shocked when the flame flickers a bit along with my movement. I freeze and Barnabas laughs softly behind me. How can he be so open to magic when he condemns it with such severity in Angelique?_

_I remind myself that Angelique has only hurt him._

_Music suddenly breaks the silence and he groans softly behind me, burying his face into my hair._

_I decide right then that I should try it. I twist my hand, flourishing my wrist in a horizontal motion and the fire goes off. I gasp and Barnabas quickly twists me around to face him. He is grinning at me, his mouth curved in a boyish way and I flush._

"_Now everything makes sense." He tells me as he leans closer, his nose brushing mine, "You have placed a spell upon me." His lips close the distance between us and his hands pull me closer. His mouth covers mine in a kiss and my eyes drift shut as I let my mouth part. His hands pull at me, tugging me closer as I fall deeper into his kiss and his body pushes mine against the closest furniture; the piano. I gasp and he swallows the gasp with his lips, pushing his tongue past the seal of my lips to plunder my mouth. _

_My chest feels heavy with emotions as he deepens the kiss and I can feel his rapid heartbeat against my palm as I press my hand on his chest._

_His fingers are digging into my hips as he tries to pull me closer and I moan, the sound strange and hoarse even to my own ears._

_He pulls his mouth away and leans his forehead against mine, before he reaches up to caress my skin. He smiles at my flushed face and slips a hand down. He sets me on the pianoforte gently and steps between my legs. My breath is laboured and short because of my anxiety, my shock at managing to diminish the fire and because of the tight corset that is digging into my abdomen._

"_I have something for you." He murmurs hoarsely as he slips his hand into his coat pocket and produces a velvet pouch. He takes my hand and empties the contents of the small pouch into my palm._

_My eyes widen at the sight of the two golden earrings. They are beautiful._

_He takes one and pushes my hair behind my ear before he slowly slips it through my earlobe._

_I blink when he grins at me and proceeds with the other one too._

"_Thank you." I whisper, but he doesn't reply. He simply grasps hold of my thighs and he coils them around his hips, pressing himself closer to me as he leans down to kiss me again._

_I do nothing more but kiss him back and he seems satisfied because he cups my face in his hands with eagerness, tilting my head to change the angle of the kiss. I am dizzy and breathless by the time he pulls back._

_He brushes his thumb across my lips and I can feel them tingling from his kiss and his touch._

_He nudges his nose against mine and I gulp because I can feel my heart expanding inside my chest for this man. It's unnatural yet at the same time absolutely normal as he takes my hand and pushes me towards the door. He leans down and swiftly picks up a pair of shoes. He winks at me and pulls me after him again, pausing by the door to help me slip my feet into the shoes._

"_Now," he places my hand in the crook of his elbow, "Let's show these off just to spite my parents." He tells me affectionately and then everything goes black._

_I step outside the door with him and I am suddenly walking on thin air. I am falling down._

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

My cheek is pressed against his shirt as I wake up. I can feel cold hands around me. Something cool is brushing my cheek and then trails lower down my skin. It reaches my neck and I relish in the way his breath hitches. I am worried about that. Do I enjoy it that he is so attached to me? That he needs me in order to survive? And does the same thing apply to him? Does he feel empowered to know that I depend on him as well? Because I do.

He lingers near my neck and I slowly open my eyes. He tenses and tries to move back, but I clamp my hand hard down on his shoulder, making him go still.

His dark gaze locks with mine and I gulp at the way he is eyeing me. He parts his lips and I shut mine, fearful of what can happen when he is looking at me like that.

There are fingers on my arm, slowly trailing down to my wrist and I take a deep breath as he comes closer to me. Time freezes as his mouth closes over mine and my eyes widen. I can hear my heartbeat going a million miles per second and by the small groan he releases I can tell that he can hear it. His palm comes up to press over my heart and I shudder.

He is not pushing me, but he is gently coaxing me to part my lips. I am stubborn, or maybe I cannot function properly when he is doing this, because I don't comply. My lips remain firmly sealed but they do press back against his. He doesn't seem angry as he pulls back to gaze at my lips. I can feel the colour rising upon my cheeks and I realize that it is the first time he has kissed me while I am awake. I avert my eyes and turn my face away from him. I can hear his sharp intake of breath as I present my neck to him.

"Jane…What are you doing?" He chokes out and I swallow hard.

"I need your help." I whisper and look at him from out of the corner of my eye.

"Help?"

"I need your help, yes." I nod my head at him, "I need you strong…because…"

"I don't need to drink from your neck in order to be strong…" He trails off, but at the same time his eyes flicker towards my throat.

I close my eyes, "I think you need to. Because I think it will help me enhance the bond." I murmur with reluctance. If that dream was any proof, then our connection had helped me find my powers in the past.

"Jane…Why? Do you _want_ to do that? Enhance the bond?" His eyes are alight with hope and I feel fear at what I am about to say.

"I have to if I want to get out of here. I want it, yes." I nod my head and I can see that he is already delirious with the need to sate himself.

"I don't need you to-…" He starts and I cut him off.

"I want you to help me practice my powers." I say and his eyes widen, "We have to get out of here. Do it." I offer him my neck again.

"Why do I have to be…strong for that?" he asks me, but he is already coming closer to me. I can see his face twisting into that feral expression as he slowly unsheathes his sharp teeth.

"Well," I start as he stops a breath away from my neck, "You cannot attack me if you're weak, can you?" I whisper and he frowns, but he is already too far gone in his hunger to fully realize what I am talking about.

With a tiny groan he leans into my neck. As his teeth pierce my skin I don't cry out in pain. I gasp and clutch at his arm, almost reflexively pulling him closer. I think I am sick as I let him take what he needs. Because it doesn't feel as painful as it should; it feels almost good.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

"Absolutely not." He shakes his head and crosses his arms over his chest.

"But I cannot do anything if not provoked." I say with irk and he purses his lips.

"Jane, I will not attack you just to make you channel your powers." He informs me slowly, enunciating every word as if speaking to a child.

I groan, "But the only times that I have been able to do it was when I was immensely afraid or angered."

"I fear I can do neither." He tells me with a scowl.

"Barnabas, please. You have to scare the living daylights out of me. You need to freak me out."

He looks weary, "I do not care of the modern phrases. They are terrible. If giving you a fright is all you need, then I can simply grace you with my fangs. They'll do the job."

I sigh, "I want to get out of here." I start and he frowns, his posture cool and I suddenly get an idea; a cruel idea, but hopefully an effective one.

"I need to get out." I say quietly.

"I need that too." He replies.

"Not like I need to." I shake my head and take a step closer. His frown deepens.

"I hate it in here. I cannot breathe in here. I am not a creature of the dark like you. I need sun and fresh air. I cannot be sustained by death like you."

I can see his spine stiffening and I go on, "You might be content with a few sucks of my blood, but I get nothing out of it. As a matter of fact I hate it."

He tenses, "What?" He whispers.

"I _hate_ it. I find it terribly insulting and debasing, and just cruel to stand this. I don't like it."

"You were willing a few minutes ago." He narrows his eyes.

"Because I thought you'd help me."

"I cannot hurt you-…"

"You have already hurt me!" My hand goes to the fading bite marks on my neck and he snarls.

"Now you're being cruel." He whispers as he takes a tiny step closer.

"Not as cruel as your lover has been to me. I have taken everything for you. I've been hurt countless times because of you. I have been lied to and I have been used to slate your thirst. I am not even myself anymore."

The words are meant to trigger his fury, but they are true. I have been subjected to all those things for him. And even though I feel differently about it now, I certainly did not feel the same at first.

"All in all, I hate living with you." I feel as if the power of my words is like a slap for him, but I carry on, "I hate the way you're looking at me." A low growl escapes his throat but I am not going to stop, "Like I am something valuable yet at the same time something that can bring you pleasure. Do you like it when I allow you to hurt me in order to get what you want-…"

My words are cut off by his loud rumble and a moment later I am thrust hard against the wall. I gasp and place my hands against his chest, trying to push him back, but he is too strong. He feels like concrete under my palms. I barely even saw him flying towards me!

His eyes soften as soon as he realizes what he's done, but before he can let go of me I speak.

"That's right. Show me the monster you really are." I breathe and his expression darkens so much that I am actually afraid he'll snap and kill me for saying these things.

His hands grasp at my arms tightly and I wiggle in his arms, but he manages to slam me against the opposite wall with an angry growl, flying us both over so he is nestled between my thighs.

My back collides painfully with the harsh stone and my eyes widen when I see how close he is. I brace myself against the wall and try to push him back, but he's having none of it. He holds me fast against the wall.

"I am far too lenient on you, Jane. You don't know how much of a monster I can be." He rumbles as he snarls at me and I gulp.

Has he actually believed my words? I have no time to think on that because I am suddenly presented with his elongated canines. I cry out in sheer fright and close my eyes. I push out with my hand, but he is levitating us both above the ground with his feet. I gasp and open my eyes, watching with increasing terror as he bares his teeth at me, his eyes flashing with fury and I act on an impulse. I take a harsh breath and before I can think much on it I push at his belly, which is painfully crushing my arm, with my palm. At first nothing happens, but when I feel the edges of his elongated canines against the sensitive skin of my neck a wave of fear and anxiety propels my hand forward. My fingers are barely brushing his strong stomach, but I can feel a scorching wave pulsing through my entire arm. It takes a miniscule move of my fingertips for him to fly back and away from me.

He lands against the opposite wall in a heap of limbs and I am suddenly released. I fall to the ground with a soft cry and I immediately open my eyes. The cell is not that big so the power I just used mustn't have been so great. No magic light or sparkle escaped my fingers and I blink.

As my eyes find his, I am shocked to see the satisfied smirk upon his lips. Damn him! He knew what I was doing and he went along with it.

"Jesus, you scared me out of my own skin." I whisper and I watch with some relief as his face softens, the dark twisted mask slowly falling off his face. He slowly stands and flexes his shoulders, his eyes glimmering and his fangs still visible between his lips.

"That was the point, yes?" his voice is husky with an animalistic tinge to it as he rolls up the sleeves of his shirt and smirks crookedly at me, "Again." He murmurs and before I have the time to recover he lunges forward and towards me again.

I don't know if my fear for his true self is valid or not, but I think it will help me. A lot.

**End of chapter 12**

**Author's note: Something big will happen in the next chap…What, you say? Well, you have to review to find out! Haha, evil me!**

**Thank you for reading! Comments, please? They are my inspiration!**

**Xxx Lina ;o)**


	14. Chapter 13

**A/N: Welcome, welcome! Today is international Narration Day so it is very fitting for this to be posted, haha!**

**I want to thank: MissMisc3, TinkerbellxO, Emma, Gary the Snail x3, Jandra1969, Balder Rask, XantheXV, ForeverACharmedOne, xxPaige23xx, dionne dance, CharlieCats and PGAEmma.**

**Oh, by the way, I have a new story in the works…My first Crossover. It's going to be between Dark Shadows & The Ninth Gate…More info at the end of the chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Chapter 13**

'_**If time is not real, then the dividing line between this world and eternity, between suffering and bliss, between good and evil is also an illusion.'**_

_**~Herman Hesse**_

My hand is tingling, my limbs are aching, but I squeeze my eyes shut as Barnabas' teeth dive towards my neck. When I can feel the sharp edges of his deadly fangs graze my neck, I let out an undignified squeal and push him away with my bare, sore hand. My weak magic manages to send him to the ground and I know that it is not an improvement from my first try.

He groans as he is pushed away from me and I quickly open my eyes to look at my hand with shock. His teeth do the trick every time though. I wasn't even sure that I had such a fear of his fangs until he started baring them to me menacingly.

"Huh." I am breathless and I can hear him as he slowly stands up form the ground. I look up and when I see him coming closer for another round of pushing and pulling and falling, I raise my hand up to stop him.

"Wait, wait." I wheeze as I lean forward to clasp my knees, "I can't. No more." I shake my head and he pauses.

"I should take care of your cuts then." He murmurs and I reach up to finger the various scratches and incisions on my cheek and neck. I watch as he approaches and takes my hand-my magical hand- in his. His eyes trail up and down the pale skin and when he pulls my inner forearm up to his lips my mouth goes dry.

"I am going to have to do it without provocation though, you know." I say quietly as his lips and tongue make quick work of my scratches, "I can't wait to be attacked."

He looks up at me with dark eyes and ruffled hair and blinks slowly. When he is done with my arm, he steps closer and brushes his mouth against my cheek.

"I know."

"But I can't do it on will…And I'm tired." I lean against the wall as he cleans a smudge of blood from my temple with his thumb.

My hand is pressed against his scarred stomach and the coolness of his bare skin feels wonderful against my sore fingers. Who knew that channeling magic would be so tiresome? I feel drained. All I want is to fall asleep and eat. Maybe eat first and then sleep, but I know that's just wishful thinking. It's been a day since my last meal and I am already feeling the effects in my body.

I slide down until I am sitting on the dirty ground and Barnabas follows me. His hands right my robe so it's covering my thin shoulder and then his hand is on my cheek.

"You're warm. You should sleep. And then you should practice more-…"

"No more. Not today! For God's sake, I am exhausted. And she'll appear at some point today. I am surprised she hasn't appeared yet…" I trail off and then my eyes go wide, "You think she's seen us?"

Barnabas shakes his head, "I doubt it. I would have heard her… Her lapdog is probably waiting outside though." He turns his face towards the door with a sneer and I gulp.

The werewolf. I had forgotten about him. Oh Jesus, we have no chance with him. What can my poor attempts at magic do with such a beast?

I start to hyperventilate and clutch at Barnabas' sleeve with all my might. He turns to me and puts his hands on my shoulders.

"Jane?"

I shake my head because all the exhaustion of the last few weeks is starting to take its toll on me. It's been weeks! Maybe even months! Days and days of practice and all I can manage is push someone against the wall. No other kind of magic. No spells, no incantations; nothing. How am I supposed to stand a chance against Angelique with no knowledge of witchcraft? It's ludicrous and I want to laugh, but my throat is clogged up and my eyes are filled with tears.

"Jane!" His hands are on my face, cupping my cheeks and as he shakes me I am forced to lock eyes with him. His dark eyes are wide and glimmering and…fierce.

I swallow with difficulty, past the lump in my throat, and part my mouth to get some air in.

"Jane, breathe. Just breathe." His voice is liquid honey and I blink. A couple of tears escape my eyes and roll down my cheeks. His thumbs are quick to wipe them away and I sniff deeply, trying to regain my composure.

"Breathe." His command is quiet and hoarse, but I find myself doing exactly that. I breathe deeply and slowly, pushing the scary thoughts to the back of my mind. His gaze is soothing, grounding; intense and I unconsciously lean towards him until my forehead is pressed against his.

His entire body goes stiff all of a sudden, but then his lips are on my nose, trailing over the bone and I close my eyes, breaking the eye contact. His hands move away from my face to snake around my back. His fingers are pressing against my clothed skin and I know he can feel my bones digging into his palms and I wince. I have never felt more undesirable than I do now and that's a shock, because I have always felt rather plain. That's what I always was; a plain, too thin, too simple girl.

His body softens suddenly and I can feel him pressing closer to me, his lips on my forehead and his hands on my lower back.

I sniff and I can feel another stray tear drying on my cheek as I press my face into his neck. His temperature is a bit soothing against my flushed skin and I sigh. His arms tighten around me and I don't have the will to object when he turns so that he is the one pressed against the wall. His hand slides under my knees and he pulls me onto his lap, as if I am a baby. I smile, but when his tightly coiled muscles press against me I tense up. I close my eyes shut, but I can't help but wonder if this feeling; this special connection that is between us will continue to be as fierce when we are out of this place. My breath hitches at the vision of us being free and I swallow hard. It's the first time I think hopefully about the future, but my hope is clouded by my apprehension. What if my emotions towards him are just because of this place? What if our situation has made me susceptible to his attentions?

His fingers disturb my thoughts as he runs them through my sweat soaked hair and I slowly place my hand over his chest. He inhales deeply and my hand moves along with his chest. Up and down, up and down, until the motion and his steady, yet slow breathing lulls me into sleep. I am lost into sweet oblivion.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_Something soft is under me and I groan deeply. My eyes are closed and a cool, erratic breath is fanning over my neck. Hands are on my body and I can feel a deep, dull, but at the same time sweet ache between my thighs. Lips are latched onto my neck and I tilt my head to the side. A moan is enough to break me from my numb state of slumber and slowly I open my eyes when I feel something hard, and yet at the same time smooth pressing deep inside me, parting me, claiming me. _

_I blink rapidly as my gaze falls upon the rippling muscles of a straining pale back. My eyes widen and when another thrust rocks me hard against the mattress I groan. My hands reach up and clutch at the shoulders that are above me and a pair of unfathomably dark eyes flashes before my gaze. I gasp as Barnabas hisses and leans down to kiss me. His lips are insistent and hot. How is that even possible? How can someone so cold be so warm all of a sudden? A hand curls around my thigh and brings it further away from my body. A hoarse groan escapes me as he manages to slide deeper inside me and he growls deep in his throat as his free hand grasps my chin. His eyes lock with mine as he pulls away from my mouth and I watch as he swivels his hips sharply, pinning me harder against the mattress._

_I cry out and a tear escapes my eye because I don't know if the feeling in my lower belly is painful or pleasurable. Maybe it's both. The sensation is intense, stifling yet at the same time liberating. There is a deep ache in my chest which coils tighter and tighter with every move of his strong hips. I buck under him and even as I move I am not sure if I want to push him away or pull him closer._

_A low grunt from him is my only response as his hands trap both my wrists. He slams them roughly against the pillow on either side of my head and my eyes widen when his gaze travels from my face, to my neck and stomach, until he rests his eyes on the place where we are joined. My cheeks flush horribly as I am compelled to follow his gaze and my breath gets caught into my throat when he closes his eyes and thrusts more powerfully inside me. My inner thighs and hipbones are throbbing from the force of his movements and I close my eyes when I feel my body reacting to him. My skin feels as if it's on fire as his hands release my wrists and trail down my sides instead. I can feel him moving as he wraps his hands around my knees and I slowly open my eyes to see him sitting back on his knees. It takes a tug on my knees for him to pull me closer and I lock my legs around his waist as his hand grasps my arm. In one swift movement I am pressed against his chest with his hand in my hair. I tangle my arms around his neck as his hips never stop their incessant pounding and when his lips cover mine I feel beads of sweat sliding from my neck and into the neckline of my top. I flush when I realize that we are both partly clothed. The material of his pants is scratching my thighs as he moves, but my top doesn't remain on me for long. His hand trails up my back and his fingers hook on the material like claws. With a snarl he tears the fabric in two and pulls it impatiently away from my body. His hands are cool on my back as he palms it and I cry out when a particular thrust rocks me harshly against his lap. His mouth finds mine, but his kiss is brief. His hands release me and without him to hold me up I find myself sprawled onto the large bed again. A flash of white and gray cuts through my vision and the sight of red curtains is enough to confirm my suspicions. We are in the mansion and probably in his room._

_My breath is knocked out of me when he falls on top of me and when he pulls my leg up and over his shoulder I gasp. _

"_Jane." His voice is hoarse, barely recognizable and his eyes are hooded. I watch with fascination that his pupils are dilating further with each move and I gulp deeply. My breath hitches as the bliss slowly, but surely surpasses the pain and I am almost shocked when my other leg coils tightly around his thigh on its own. I blink as he falls onto his elbow and when his eyes zero onto my panting lips I lean up towards him. His mouth finds mine and the kiss, unlike the previous ones, is clumsy, sloppy and impatient. My head falls back down on the pillow and his hand pushes my leg off his shoulder so that he can lean further down to me. His hand moves and brushes over my collarbone as his hips start moving more sharply against me. His pace is almost uneven and jerky and my eyes widen when his fingers stroke over the top of my left breast. His mouth captures the tip of my breast and I am breathless as he slowly makes his way towards the top. His lips and tongue lave at the skin and his left hand reaches out to hold my own. I arch my back against the feeling and his low rumble causes me to shiver. His eyes flash up to mine and I watch as he pulls back. His lips part and through the lust and heat I can see the sharp edges of his teeth. I tense up, because I know what this means. His gaze is soft, dark and wicked at the same time and his tongue gently brushes his lower lip as he starts moving forward._

_My breathing is loud even to my own ears and he groans softly._

"_Hush." He murmurs as his fingers brush over the moist skin of my breast, "Jane."_

_I release a shuddery breath as the combined force of his thrusts and his gaze is enough to bring me to my knees._

_Sensing my slowly relaxing state he growls and in one swift move he pounces. His teeth bite down roughly and I cry out. I can feel his fangs digging into the pliable skin and I shudder when his lips close over his teeth. The bite is deep, penetrating and rather painful, but I know why. After all, it has only one purpose; to mark, scar and claim. _

_My back arches off the bed as he doesn't pull away and it is almost as if I can feel his teeth biting through my very heart._

_His hips grind hard against my own for one last time and as I can feel his release inside me, I close my eyes. My breathing is harsh, heavy and I whimper. The sound triggers something and in a flash his lips and teeth are gone from my breast. I cry out as an electric current rushes through me, jolting me to my very core and then his arms are there. I am pulled up and into his arms as the pain on my chest gets more intense. I gasp for breath and clutch at his lower back when he hisses. I can feel him breathing heavily as well and the fact manages to calm me down. He groans almost painfully and then quickly rolls onto his back. I am pulled along with him and I land on his chest. His hands get lost in my hair as he holds me, but his eyes are roaming my body._

_He snarls angrily as he eyes the purple bruises that are forming on my skin, but his gaze is quick to return to my chest. He growls quietly and if I wasn't so dazed I would think the noise is filled with lust._

_My eyes are wide as I look at him and suddenly I collapse boneless on top of him, weakly tugging on the covers._

_His hand pulls up the sheets and as I feel my sweaty back drying, I blink. No dreams have ever felt so real. Not a single one. _

_I sigh heavily and startle when his hand wedges its way between us. His fingers brush over the throbbing marks on my chest and I moan. His hands grab at my waist and I am suddenly lifted upwards. I blink rapidly as his mouth presses a firm kiss against the bite, and my lips part in awe. His features are back to normal; soft, calm and soothing. His eyes find mine and he drops me back down on his chest before he closes the gap between us. As his mouth covers mine I can feel myself getting breathless._

_I am waking up._

_I gasp as I land onto my feet. I open my eyes and gaze at my surroundings quickly. I am not awake. This is another dream. I whirl around and I frown when I realize that I am out in the open. Trees, plants and flowers are creating an Eden-like scenery around me. A warm breeze disturbs my loose hair and something heavy is weighing down my arm. A basket of seafood is around my elbow and my eyes widen. I am back in the past._

_I look down upon myself and I frown when I realize that I am dressed in a simple, but beautiful sea green dress. A matching shawl is wrapped around my shoulders and for the first time I can feel the pressure of a corset around my waist. I try to inhale deeply, but I am not allowed to._

"_Damn it!" I mutter and as I turn, I see the tall walls of Collinwood in front of me. I gulp._

_A horse's whine causes me to stiffen, but I don't turn around. Not even when I hear the hooves getting closer. I start walking towards the mansion, but I am stopped._

"_Ms. Wald?" Barnabas' voice is smooth and surprised and I pause. I take a deep breath and slowly turn around. I am not even sure in what period of our relationship I am this time._

_I look at the sky and then at him, "Good morning." I say quietly as he jumps down from his horse and starts walking towards me._

"_Good morning…" his eyes roam my form and he smiles, "Ms. Wald…Do you like it?" He asks me with sparkling eyes and I blink._

"_Excuse me?"_

_His face falls and he clears his throat, "My gift…Do you like it?" His gaze is intense and focused on my face and realization suddenly dawns._

"_Oh…Um…"_

"_You look lovely in it." He murmurs and I tense up. Is he jesting?_

"_Thank you."_

_He takes a step closer and boldly reaches out to finger my obviously new shawl._

"_I was informed of your birthday…Have I offended you?" He frowns a bit and I look up at him. His cheeks are a pale pink and his hair windswept. I am suddenly too much aware of my previous vision and I flush._

"_No…" I shake my head and I know I must sound like an idiot. My responses suck._

"_I am glad you are wearing it. You're beautiful." His voice is quiet as if he is afraid to speak the words too loud and I almost gasp out loud. Beautiful? Is he blind? I am not beautiful._

"_I haven't seen you in a while." He says as he steps next to me, trying to find my eyes, but I am stubbornly looking down, "I was beginning to despair." He whispers as he reaches out and tucks a lock of my hair behind my ear. _

_I jump back and he freezes._

"_Mr. Collins." My voice is sharp, but I am confused, "I do not know what I did to make you take such liberties-…"_

"_Please." His hand catches my own and I am suddenly breathless, "Please, do not be cross with me. I apologize if I have offended you. Please." He murmurs and I don't know what made me shout at him. Maybe it's the fact that in most of our time together he is the one in control; he is the one in the know._

"_I am not." I whisper at last, but I take a step back. _

_He looks forlorn._

"_I need to take these inside." I motion towards the basket and he swallows hard before he nods. He steps aside and as I start walking he falls into step beside me._

"_It's the kiss, isn't it?" He whispers as we enter the mansion's back garden and I falter._

"_What?"_

_He licks his lips and comes to stand in front of me, heedless of the gatekeeper who is patrolling the grounds behind us._

"_I realize that it was not proper of me…Especially now…" he averts his eyes for a moment, but when they are back on me they are fiercer than before, "But I do not regret it." He takes a step closer and I have to step back, but he continues following me._

"_I'd do it again." He murmurs hoarsely as he tilts his head to the side, "And again," he moves even closer until I can feel his breath on my face, "and again…" he bites his lower lip and gazes at my form briefly, "And again, until I was drunk from your taste." _

_I inhale sharply and as I make to sidestep him he catches my waist and keeps me secured. _

"_Ms. Wald…Jane, you must understand my illness. It's far too advanced now. And there is only one medicine. You-…"_

"_Master." Angelique's voice causes me to stiffen and my hands start to tremble as Barnabas closes his eyes and grits his teeth._

"_What is it?" He calls with barely contained irritation._

"_Your parents need you. It's about the engagement party, sir." She is casually leaning against the threshold of the back door. Her eyes are watching us like a hawk watches its prey._

_Barnabas swallows hard, "I'll be right there."_

_She lingers, but eventually she walks back inside._

"_Jane-…" his hand touches mine again and I react on an impulse._

"_No." I take a step back and shake my head._

_He sighs, "Will you be there?" He asks and I blink._

"_I'm sorry?" I whisper._

"_Your name is on the help list for…" He trails off almost guiltily and I blink rapidly._

_I want to gape at him. Is he flirting with me while he's getting engaged? How…how on earth did this happen? All this effort for _me_? It's hilarious in a tragic way._

"_Your imminent betrothal?" I finish for him and he looks away._

"_I…Yes."_

_I take a deep breath through my nose and slowly nod my head, "Don't worry, Mr. Collins. I shall be there to service your guests and you-…'_

"_I don't want you to work for me!" he hisses and blocks my way by slamming a hand against the wall, "I want to see you. That's all." He says quietly and I shake my head in shock. _

_He is so…arrogant. He wants everything without losing anything. Impossible._

"_You make me sick." I murmur, or rather blurt out, and his face looks stricken as I duck under his arm and make my way into his house._

_As soon as I step in, the icy blue gaze of Angelique Bouchard locks with my plain brown one and I gasp. Before I can move or blink, a force knocks me off my feet and I am falling, face down towards the ground. _

_I shriek when my cheek connects with the cold floor. Everything goes black._

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

I open my eyes and my hand immediately goes to my cheek.

"Jane." Barnabas' voice is alarmed, "Wake up. She's coming." He whispers and I sit up quickly. As I stand, my hand goes to my breast and he notices.

"What is it?" He murmurs and I know from his guilty expression that he saw my last dream. He is ashamed and I am angry. Who knew he was such a bold charmer when he wanted something he couldn't have?

"Nothing." I shake my head crisply and I don't mention the vision of our bond completion. It's useless right now. And I am angry at him. He can sense it because he's staring at me with wide eyes.

I ignore him and pull my hand away from my collarbone just as the door opens. Angelique steps in looking rather odd.

"Time for your baths. Get moving. This place reeks." She wrinkles her nose and her eyes are on Barnabas as he slowly moves towards the door. Her hand casually brushes his side and in one swift move he has her hand clasped in his hand.

She gasps and then laughs huskily, "You're strong…How surprising. Maybe it's the full moon." Her eyes fall on me with distaste and I gasp when I hear the distinctive creak of bone breaking. She cries out and she glares at the vampire in front of her.

"Look at her again and I'll tear it off." He pushes her hand away from him as if burned and she raises her chin before she flicks her wrist. He is sent backwards with a groan and he chuckles darkly.

"How repetitive." With that he walks out of the room, but he stumbles when an invisible hook curls around his arm.

"Move." She spats at me as she rubs her hurt wrist against her thigh.

I walk after Barnabas and stumble too as my arm is trapped in something cold, but indiscernible. Iron.

I walk behind him as she walks quietly beside me and I startle when she clicks her tongue.

"Edon!" she barks and I stumble.

Barnabas turns to look at me, his eyes narrowed in worry. I shake my head at him.

"Bloody mutt." She mutters and I gulp. She's calling for the werewolf. I want to be sick when I remember him.

"Turn the corner." She commands as she gives a push on my shoulder. I want to break her hand for touching me, but I know that I can't. I am not able to.

A rustle from our right causes me to pause and I look towards that direction. Angelique pauses too.

"Edon?" she calls again as she inhales deeply, probably trying to track his scent. Her eyes darken, but she has no time to react when something tall, heavy and hairy pounces on her. She is sent tumbling to the ground with the creature on top of her and Barnabas pushes me out of the way. My hand is freed from the unseen shackle and I collide with the wall when Barnabas steps in front of me. His dark eyes are narrowed and confused, but they go wide as he stares at the creature that just attacked Angelique.

"My God." He whispers and I look, really look at the scene in front of me.

Among the hair and paws there is blond hair. It's a woman; a female werewolf.

Angelique gives a sharp cry of pain and lashes out with her hand. The werewolf is pushed off of her. The creature lands against the wall with a whine and Angelique's eyes fall on Barnabas as she stands up.

"You…You and your wretched family." She flicks her fingers and Barnabas is quick to duck as a silver blade is thrown towards him. The sharp cutting edge barely misses my face and lands on the wall by my ear instead. I cry out as debris is thrust against my cheek from the force of the hit and I look at the witch.

She is snarling, but before she has the chance to move forward the werewolf, the _female_ werewolf, is on her again.

Barnabas pushes me out of the way and moves forward towards the witch, but instead of the wall I fall on something strong, hard and rather smelly. Edon.

I cry out as his sharp hands clutch at my shoulders and when he throws me down on the dirty ground I gasp in pain. I must have fractured my rib because my breath is coming out in tiny sharp gasps that shake me with pain.

He growls and snarls down at me and I yell as I try to kick out at him. His hand closes around my calf and he squeezes until I scream in pain.

Barnabas whirls around to me and growls, but a hand in his hair causes him to stumble back.

I watch out of the corner of my eye as Angelique throws the other werewolf away and Barnabas cries out.

"Carolyn!" He screams as he grabs Angelique's arm and starts squeezing. Does he know the other wolf?

Angelique grits her teeth and slams him hard against the wall, but the pain on my leg is too much and I have to turn my attention back to the creature in front of me.

In one sharp move, he throws my leg back down and I bite my tongue from the immense pain. I inhale sharply and turn onto my stomach in a futile attempt to get away, but something heavy and hard falls against my back when I try to. I gasp out loud as a hand clamps down on my shoulder. The fingers and nails dig into my skin and I scream again.

"Jesus Christ!" I take big breaths through my nose and put power on my back. I arch my back and manage to push him back just as Barnabas manages to throw Angelique off of him. There is a huge gap on her neck and another hole on her bare shoulder. I quickly turn around when I hear Edon growling and my eyes go wide as I watch him lunging for my neck.

I scream and thrash my body under his weight, undulating under him in an effort to get him off of me. He snarls as he is pushed back, but then his claw-like hands are around my neck, digging into my flesh and choking me. I gurgle and try to lift my knee between us in a weak try to lift him off, but he is too strong. My head is forced backwards and my eyes go wide as I start to see stars. The werewolf above me is snarling and growling menacingly and I can see through my blurred vision as Barnabas throws his body forward towards us. Angelique is distracted by the other werewolf, but she notices the movement.

"_Recidimus."_ She mutters the incantation and Carolyn is thrust away from her.

The witch storms up behind Barnabas and curls her fingers in his loose shirt. He screams in pure fury and reaches behind him, trying to pull her off.

I squeeze my eyes shut and gasp for air, but the fingers around my throat are squeezing too hard and my vision is getting darker and darker. I open my eyes and wiggle my hips, thrashing my legs around and I feel victorious when my knee hits him in the groin. Edon groans and momentarily loosens his hold and I gasp huge gulps of air, but a voice brings me back to the danger above me.

"Jane, do it! Jane!" Barnabas' voice is too loud and my time is too little.

I look up at him just as Edon tightens the hold around me and a flare of hope is triggered inside of me when Angelique is thrown off of Barnabas by the other werewolf. Carolyn, or whoever that is, is on Angelique's back and her arms are tight around her neck. Barnabas whirls around towards the witch and I watch his back muscles tensing as he bares his teeth at her.

"Do it and she's dead. You always had a flare for weaklings-…" Her speech is cut off as he pounces on her. His face dives quickly for her neck and as I hear the ripping sound of her flesh I tense up.

The werewolf on top of me tenses up and bares his teeth down at me. My eyes widen at the sight of his horrible teeth and before I know it my hands are pressed against his solid chest. My first attempt is weak and he barely budges, but as I hear the painful roar of Angelique I try again. My arm vibrates with electricity and as I shoot out my hand he falls off of me. I watch as he flies back and back, far away from me, until he is thrown onto the ground on the other side of the hall.

Feeling breathless, dizzy and ready to faint, I turn around on my stomach and watch with wide eyes as Barnabas sinks his teeth again and again into Angelique's neck until her eyes are rolled to the back of her head. I huddle backwards as the werewolf on her back grasps her head with both hands and with a swift pull severs it from her neck.

I scream and squeeze my eyes shut as Barnabas stumbles back. I hear the sickening sound of Angelique's body as she collapses lifeless onto the ground and when I open my eyes I cry out. The witch's head is lying a few feet away from her body and I can't help it. I scream again, louder this time.

Barnabas turns to me with wide eyes and wipes his mouth clean from Angelique's flesh, but his sudden movement scares me so much that I slide away from him.

The standing werewolf looks at us with what seems like worry and I cover my mouth with my trembling hand.

"Jane…It's alright…"

He touches my hurt leg and I scream both in agony and fear, before everything goes black.

In my deep, blissful oblivion I inhale fresh, unpolluted air. We are free.

**End of chapter 13**

***Translation: Recidimus= fall back***

**Author's note: Still here? Good. You cannot complain. This chapter had it all! Haha.**

**So, liked it? Hated it? I really want to know so please review and make my spring a little brighter! Please?**

**Oh, and the new crossover fic I mentioned is called **_**The Vampire's Deal**_**. You can find the first cover pics on my Facebook page and I will prepare a sneak peek for you soon.**

**Until next time!**

**Xxx Lina ;o)**


	15. Chapter 14

**A/N: Welcome, dears! I want to thank everyone who is reading this, but a very special thank you to my reviewers: Yarami, Jandra1969, BlooperLover, MissMisc3, ForeverACharmedOne, TinkerbellxO, XantheXV, missyclone, gary the Snail x3, CharlieCats, PGAEmma and dionne dance. You are all wonderful!**

**So, our couple is finally out of their prison…So, don't expect things to be exactly as they were…There will be issues…Issues that haven't been addressed while they had been in there… I am saying nothing more...**

**Oh and Happy Easter to those who celebrate it! :D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Chapter 14**

'_**Dream and give yourself permission to envision a You that you choose to be.'**_

_**~Joy Page**_

I wake up to the sound of birds chirping. I frown. It has been a lot time since I've heard the singing of birds. It sounds foreign to my ears; too loud perhaps, too strange…too nice.

I take a long deep breath without opening my eyes. The air has the scent of sun, roses and fresh polish; an odd combination.

I open my arms wide and as I do so, I feel the smoothness of silk brushing against my skin. It brings a small shiver up and down my skin, but it is not uncomfortable. I shift a little and the mattress pushes against my spine, alleviating some of my muscle pain. I try to move my leg, but the moment I do sharp pain erupts up and down my calf and I wince.

Footsteps and various sounds echo in the distance and I decide that maybe it is time to open my eyes.

The moment I do, I freeze. I am in a large bedroom. There are large balcony doors across from my bed, but the dark curtains are drawn, preventing too much light from entering the chamber. In a way, I am glad because my eyes are already hurting from the brightness. I've been too long in the dark.

I try to sit up, but something sharp pulls at my arm and I realize that an IV line is connected to my inner forearm. My eyes widen, but I sit up nonetheless. Immediately I feel dizzy and I lean back against the many pillows. My throat feels dry and my leg complains as I move it around.

I rub a hand over my face and then I hesitantly look up. I study the room and the more I stare at it, the more I come to the alarming conclusion that instead of a hospital or even my apartment, I am in a totally different place; a place I have repeatedly seen in my dreams. A place that doesn't feel as threatening as in my odd visions, but at the same time a place that is not…home.

I turn my head sharply towards the door when someone opens it and steps in. I freeze like a statue when I spot the woman. She is exactly like I have dreamed her. Vibrant red hair, pale skin, very nice clothes and very wide eyes. The doctor.

"Oh, my. You're awake." She murmurs with shock and I gulp as she storms into the room and reaches quickly for my hand. She checks my pulse, presses her hand against my forehead and then stares deeply into my eyes. Finally, she smiles.

"Your fever's down. The medication has worked. How is your leg?" She asks as she pushes the covers away and checks my bandaged ankle.

I clear my throat and I try, really try to speak, but I cannot. A gurgled groan is all I manage and I flush, slapping a hand over my mouth.

She looks up and blinks, "Do not be alarmed, dear." She covers me again and checks the IV, "You were severely dehydrated when you came in. This helps, but it will take some time until you're ready to stand." she pauses and looks at me, "Oh dear, I've alarmed you. I imagine you would like to see someone familiar."

She walks to the door, but she immediately comes back again, "My name is Julia Hoffman and I am a doctor. You can call me Julia. And you're Jane, yes? You have a few bruises on you and you have sprained your leg quite badly."

I look down upon my body and realize that I am in a silk nightdress.

"I changed you. It's mine. We cleaned you as best as we could, but you can take a proper bath when you are ready to stand from the bed." She gives me a small smile, but I do not like the way she is looking at me, the way she is studying me. I know she is a psychiatrist and I know why she is staring at me.

I want to inform her that I am not one of her cases; that I am not insane, but I realize with a start that it would be a lie. I don't know if I am well and I am pretty sure a sane person wouldn't have the dreams that I have. A sane person wouldn't allow a vampire to feed from them.

My breath hitches as everything comes back to me and I start to hyperventilate. Oh God! Not again. Not another panic attack. I try to take breaths from my nose, but the task is not as easy as it sounds and every time I squeeze my eyes shut I get dizzy.

"Jane?" Julia is speaking to me, but the moment she touches me I flinch so terribly that I startle her.

Through my heavy breaths and the sound of my blood pounding in my ears, I do not hear the approaching footsteps and when someone enters the room I miss it because I am blinking so fast that I can barely see. Everything is a blur and when a cold hand touches my arm I tense and try to locate the intruder.

"Jane?" The voice is awfully familiar, but it does not bring me comfort. All I see as I lock eyes with Barnabas is the image of him killing the witch. The pungent scent of Edon, the growls, the shouts, the sound as he and the other werewolf tear Angelique's head off. It's too vivid and everything is too loud and I push his hand away, raising my hands by my head in warning.

He freezes and drops his hand onto his lap, but he looks out of place, unsettled and worried.

"I'm sorry. I won't touch you until I have your consent…" He murmurs and I can see Julia watching us closely with her lips slightly pursed.

"But you need to breathe." He informs me calmly and I slowly lower my hands. I clench them and then I drop them onto the fluffy mattress underneath me. I give a slow nod, because I know that my voice won't work once again.

"She also needs to eat proper food." Julia speaks up and Barnabas turns to look at her while keeping his hand on the mattress by my right hand.

"She will eat when she wants to." He widens his eyes a bit at her in warning and she frowns.

"I am sorry, Barnabas. But it's necessary for her to get actual food as soon as possible. Nothing heavy, but a soup would be very nice. I did her measurements while Victoria and I had been dressing her and she weighs nothing more than 109.5 pounds. That is not healthy for her height and-…"

"Doctor, please." Barnabas cuts her off and I blink as I realize that I have lost at least twenty pounds. I start to breathe faster again and I cover my mouth with my hand.

"Fine. I will ask Mrs. Johnson for some food then." Julia mutters and then walks out of the room.

I blink, keeping my eyes away from the man in front of me because I am confused; so confused. Why did he bring me here? I want to go home. I want my own bed. I want to curl on my mattress with a cup of coffee and a book. I want…I want someone to hold me.

"I took the liberty of bringing you here…Do you object?" He asks me as we are left alone and I look up.

I narrow my eyes at him and he licks his lips in anxiety.

"Please, Jane. Don't look at me like that." He whispers hoarsely and reaches for my hand. I allow him to take it because…because I need to.

"I want to take care of you. I…It was all my fault. I am so terribly sorry-…"

"I won't give you my blood." I cut him off and I am shocked when my voice actually works, "Ever again." I look up at him and I can see the sadness and despair in his eyes, "I don't want to continue the bond. What have you really been doing, Barnabas?" I whisper and he blinks.

"I beg your pardon?" He murmurs.

"What have you really been doing all these weeks-…"

"Months…" he cuts me off and I close my eyes, "I've tried to protect you."

I look up at him at that, "Protect me? Really? If you wanted to protect me you wouldn't have pretended not to know me when we first met. You wouldn't have lied to me about the dreams. You wouldn't rely on my weakness in order to strengthen the bond….You wouldn't scare me so much at the beginning. You wouldn't pretend that you loved me when in reality you love someone else." I mutter.

"What?" His voice is incredulous.

I shake my head, "Nothing." I look away and lie down again, turning my back on him.

"How do you know anything about my feelings?"

"I've seen enough."

"Jane, don't act like a child." He admonishes as if I am a spoiled little girl.

I stop breathing for a few moments before I sit up again.

"You dare say that to me? You? You used me in my past, you use me now. How dare you accuse me of acting like a child when you have always been acting like one? Playing with people because you wanted something you could never have. You call that love?" I stare at him.

"Don't speak of things that you have no knowledge about. You've only seen glimpses of our past. I've _lived_ it." He hisses at me and I nod my head.

"And that's all I want. Nothing more."

"You don't believe that." He murmurs with such confidence that I am shocked.

"Oh, so now you know what I want?" I whisper and his eyes darken, "Stop doing that." I snap and he cocks an eyebrow.

"You cannot command me to do something that is out of my control…"

I shake my head at him, "Why do you want me to stay here?" I ask instead, "Why have you brought me here?"

He blinks slowly and then slips closer. I stiffen when he places his palm against the side of my neck.

"Jane…" he starts hoarsely, "I've brought you here because I need you." His eyes fall on my lips for a moment and his fingers briefly caress the fading bite marks on my neck, "I cannot breathe without you. Can't you see that everything has led to this? With your power, we're out of that hell. How can I let you go when together we can find heaven?"

"Stop it. Stop trying to make things better…This is sick." I can feel my throat closing up, "You cannot be the person to ground me. You've broken me…I have no powers, Barnabas. Don't you see?"

"If I've broken you, then you have fixed me." His eyes are glimmering and if I stare at them for too long I think I am going to let him do whatever he wants to me.

"It is with your scent that I've found my soul again. It is your blood that has me standing-…"

"Leave me alone. Please, just leave me alone." I whisper as I push his hand away. He grabs my hand and presses it against his hard chest for a moment, before he raises it to his lips.

"Jane…" He presses his lips against my sweaty palm and I shiver because his touch has been a healing power during the last months of my life.

God, why is my head in such a scrambled mess? I cannot think right. I cannot tell what he wants from me…or what I want from him.

"Why won't you take me home?" I ask and he looks up.

"Jane…it is not your home anymore…Someone else is living in your apartment…I-…"

"Stop…" I shake my head, "How long has it been?" I whisper and he pauses.

"Seven months…and two weeks." He murmurs and I freeze.

"Oh my God." I want to laugh, but the only thing that I do is turn away from him. I slip my hand from his and close my eyes.

"Jane…Collinwood is your home now. Please, accept the life I am giving you. I so desperately wish that I can-…"

"It's not like I have a choice, is it?" I cut him off quietly and I hear his quiet breath as he sits still behind me.

I listen as he stands from the bed and when he runs his hand through my hair in a caress, I close my eyes. He notices it and he gives a small husky groan before he leans down to kiss me. Cool lips find the skin of my cheek and I am holding my breath as he lingers. How terribly my body contradicts my words. I should be ashamed of myself.

"I love you, Jane." He breathes against my skin and I close my eyes as he slowly makes his way out of the room.

I wait for him to shut the door, but there are more footsteps and I can hear the loud inhale of breath he takes even from afar.

"We brought the food." A woman's voice echoes in the hallway and I sit up a little. I have heard this voice before.

"Victoria…Maybe we should do the introductions later…" Barnabas' voice is firm, but at the same time charming and I frown.

"Nonsense. David and I have prepared a welcome for our guest. Please, allow us to give it to her?" Victoria's voice is already bending his will. I can tell from his light chuckle and for some reason it angers me that she can make him laugh while I…I can do nothing, can I? After all, I am a food source.

I close my eyes as the door opens again and I try to push the mean thoughts away. It's not easy to believe in yourself when you're me.

I sit up and press my palms against the mattress by my thighs as an old lady with a tray comes in, followed by a woman and a child.

My eyes zero on the child and a small smile appears when I notice his slightly flushed cheeks.

"Good evening." The woman steps forward and outstretches her hand for a shake. I hesitate, but when I see her serene expression I frown. She looks more like a fairy than a woman.

Realizing I am being rude and that my social skills are rather rusty, I shake my head and gently take her hand.

She smiles, "My name's Victoria. I am David's governess. You can call me Vicky." She tells me and I nod.

"Jane." I murmur and I notice that she is thin, but not as thin as I am. I feel rather embarrassed when I realize how I must look. She is beautiful.

"And this is David." She lets go of my hand and places a hand on the young boy's shoulder.

"He is my nephew…Almost." Barnabas mutters the last word and I look at the boy.

"Hello."

He approaches the bed and quickly hands me a large paper. Depicted on the paper, is a picture of me while asleep and I wonder if someone had let him in while I was unconscious.

I look up at Barnabas and he has a small smirk on his face.

I look away and focus on the paper again, "You've made me far prettier than I am, David. Thank you." I say quietly as I reach out and place the picture on my nightstand.

The little boy smiles and ducks his head, "You're welcome."

Suddenly there is something heavy upon my lap and I look to my right. The old lady has placed the tray on my knees.

I watch her with wide eyes as she takes a brush from a drawer and starts brushing my hair. I blink in surprise.

"That is Mrs. Johnson. Our housekeeper…" Barnabas speaks up as the old woman tries in vain to untangle my hair.

"She does quite random things." David informs me and then rushes out of the room.

Victoria laughs and Barnabas smiles gently as the boy passes by him on his way out.

Mrs. Johnson finally stops and pats me gently on the shoulder as she moves away, but I can tell as I reach up to touch my hair that my stringy locks are in far worse state than before.

My gaze falls upon the tray of food in my lap and my stomach growls.

"You need some help?" Victoria asks me and I look up. I want her to go away, but as she looks at me softly and gullibly, I realize that it's not going to be easy to hate her. Like Josette…Josette. Oh my God. She looks exactly like Josette and from the way Barnabas is looking at her I realize that he feels something for her…I am not sure what exactly.

"No…I think I don't. Thank you." I shake my head and grab the spoon. The scent of chicken and vegetables reaches my nostrils and I am already salivating.

I dip the spoon into the thick liquid and the two people in the room stop staring at me.

"I didn't see you at the beach today. I thought you were going to come with us." Victoria says quietly and I pause mid-chew.

Barnabas hesitates and then clears his throat, "I couldn't come today."

I swallow and watch as he places his hand on her lower back, trying to lead her from the room, but when she places her hand on his stomach the food I have only just swallowed comes back up with a vengeance.

I empty my insides all over the tray and I quickly reach for the paper towel. I press it against my mouth as Barnabas runs back inside the room.

"Jane?" He asks and I shake my head.

"I am fine. Please I am fine." I say quietly, "I just need to rinse my mouth." I murmur embarrassingly and he takes the tray from me.

"I will help. I'll just get a basin." Victoria speaks up and then she's gone.

"I will order more soup." Barnabas says to me quietly, but I shake my head.

"I'll just sleep." I murmur before I lie back down.

I get no chance to rinse my mouth because I am asleep before Victoria gets back.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_I think I am lost. I am finding myself in a large room. It looks like a drawing room. It is dark and it is illuminated by various candles. The French doors are open and a cool breeze is laving at my feet as I stand in the middle of the room._

_My hands are curled around my skirt and as I look down I notice that I am wearing a black dress and a white apron._

_I look at the room once again and I realize with a little dread that I am in Collinwood._

_I close my eyes and I realize with alarm that the dreams are not going to stop. On the contrary, I think they will get more frequent._

_A door opens and closes behind me and the sound of slow music briefly disturbs the quietness._

_I turn around and as soon as I spot him by the door, I tense up. He is dressed in a pair of dark breeches, a crimson waistcoat, a crisp white shirt and a long overcoat with gold and red trimming._

_I feel underdressed in his presence._

"_Jane." He murmurs with a soft smile, "You came. Thank you."_

_I take a look around and then I notice the various flowers that are decorating the room and balcony in abundance. Pink roses stand out more than any other flowers._

"_I feared you wouldn't…You barely looked at me all evening." His voice is odd, choked up and husky as he leans against the door, a blatant sign of his reluctance to let me go any time soon._

"_It wouldn't be proper." The words are out of my mouth before I can stop them._

"_Proper?" he pushes away from the door, "Do my actions speak of propriety? I should be ashamed of myself." he murmurs, "But I am not." He shakes his head as he comes to stop in front of me._

_Hesitantly, his hands reach for my shoulders, but I take a step back. _

"_What do you want?" I ask instead._

_He takes a deep breath, "Are you still cross with me? Tell me, I must know."_

"_Why? What would change if you knew?" I ask him quietly, but challengingly._

"_Jane…Don't do this to me. You must be aware of my feelings-…'_

"_You are preventing me from performing my duties. You know that don't you?" I cut him off as an unexplained anger rises inside me, "Unlike what you may think, I have to get my payment tonight."_

_He inhales sharply and quickly reaches into his coat pocket. He produces a few gold coins and then grabs my hand._

"_And you shall be paid." He places them in my palm, "As long as you don't go just yet." He whispers and I gape at him._

"_Excuse me?" I whisper and he swallows thickly._

"_Do I have to offend you in order to make you realize what I want?" He asks me and I snatch my hand back._

"_Money? What will you have me do? Clean this room? Dust it? Perhaps polish the silverware? I imagine my compensation for that is not supposed to be that high." I hiss, "What do you want from me, Mr. Collins?" I ask him._

"_You know what I want."_

_In a fit of fury, I throw the money on the floor. The coins hit the carpet with a dull thud and he flinches._

"_Would that be all?" I ask him through tightly clenched teeth._

"_No."_

"_If you have brought me here to propose this…indecency…If you are even suggesting that I should become your mistress-…"_

_His hands grab my arms before I have the time to finish, "I desire you." he murmurs and I freeze, "I cannot breathe without seeing you. If that is indecent then I am a cad."_

"_Yes, sir. You are." I nod my head and slap his hands away, "It was not my choice to come here today. Unlike you, I do not burn with longing because of your absence. I am not going to commit such an offence to someone else because you think you that you want something from me." I take a step back, "I was forced to come here. I didn't do it for you."_

_I do not know if the words are true, but I can tell that they have wounded him deeply. My stomach clenches at the realization._

"_Did you get my gift?" He whispers as if I did not just snap at him with such rudeness and brutality._

"_Mr. Collins-…"_

"_You never call me by my name." He cuts me off sharply._

"_I have no reason to."_

_He takes a step closer, "You need only speak the words and I will ruin this. All of this. I will go against my father and I will-…"_

"_I do not want you to do anything, sir. I cannot understand your fixation with me. I am not something worthy of your ardor. You barely know me." I whisper with incredulity._

"_I don't have to know you to crave you." he murmurs, "You shine from afar." His fingers trail over the neckline of my black dress and I push his hand away. His fingers grab my wrist and I gasp as he uses force._

"_Even the deep sadness and despair that I saw in your eyes tonight…Even with those emotions, no one can compare with their shine. They're beautiful." He lowers my hand until both of our hands are left suspended beside our sides._

"_You're mad." I whisper._

"_Did you like the necklace?" He whispers back and I blink._

"_Necklace?" I frown._

_He nods, "I made it. The gem is a dark amethyst. They brought it to me from Brazil." he starts and I blink as his dark eyes lock with mine, "Do you know the story of the gemstone?" He asks and I slowly shake my head in the negative. He smiles and licks his lips as his fingers reach up to touch my cheek._

"_Amethystos was a young, Greek maiden and without meaning to, she managed to seduce Dionysus, the ancient Greek God of intoxication. The God had fallen for the young woman, but she rejected him, spurning his affections and insisting that she would always remain virtuous." He whispered as his fingers trail down to my jaw, "Amethystos prayed to all the Gods to remain untouched for all eternity and one of them heard her prayers." he smiled and cocked his head to the side, "The God was Artemis, the Goddess of the Wilderness. She transformed Amethystos into a white stone, saving her from the wrath of the spurned God. Dionysus, angered and sad by the turn of events, spilled wine over the precious stone. Despaired and humbled by Amethystos' desire to remain forever virtuous, he shed his tears over the statue. The stone was permanently stained with the wine and Dionysus' tears, thus creating the color of the gemstone." He finished and against my will I am enthralled by the tale. But I imagine that was his goal anyway._

_Blinking, I take a deep breath, "It's a beautiful story, my lord. Do you always seduce ladies with sad, romantic myths?" I ask in a shaky voice and his eyes darken a little more as I speak._

"_No, my dear. Most of them are not willing to listen." He breathes before he covers my lips with his._

_I tense up as his hands encircle my waist and when he crushes me to his chest and walks me backwards, I press hard against his chest. He pulls away to breathe heavily against my face and then his hands are on the knot of the apron. He tugs at it roughly until it is loosened and then he is pulling it away from my body. His hand trails up to my neck which he cradles gently._

"_Jane." The name rolls off his tongue almost sinuously and I shudder as he reaches up to remove the pin that is holding my hair together. He slips the pin in his inner coat pocket and I am surprised by his action, but I have no time to ask him to give it back. His fingers sink deep in my hair which is reaching my lower back. He inhales deeply and leans his forehead against mine before he speaks._

"_I will come to you tomorrow. Wear the necklace." he kisses me again, deeply and insistently before he pulls back with a sigh, "Please.". He removes his fingers from my hair and then pulls back altogether._

_He leans down and picks up the apron before he turns on his heel and walks out of the room, shutting the door behind him. _

_I am left staring at the door with wide eyes and tingling lips. _

_A sharp sting upon my inner arm startles me and I know that I am waking up; swiftly._

I open my eyes with a start and as I clear my vision I see someone looming over me. It's a young woman, no older than seventeen, and she has just pulled the IV out of my arm.

"Who are you? Tell me the truth because I saw what you did." She tells me with narrowed eyes and I sit up just as rapid footsteps thump loudly outside the door.

"What I did? And what did I do exactly?' I ask her quietly, my voice still groggy from sleep and my lips still stinging from the dream.

Abruptly the door opens and Barnabas appears next to me in a flash, his hand upon my head in a blatant show of ownership…or protection. Maybe both.

"Carolyn." He warns and I sit still.

_Carolyn?_ My eyes go wide as I look at the young girl. She is the werewolf…Impossible.

"She can talk, right? I want to know what was that shit she did back there." She snaps at him stubbornly and I lick my dry lips as Barnabas takes a deep breath.

'Now is not the time to talk about this. It's late. Go back to your room-…"

"I am not leaving until I know." She cuts him off and I look up at the vampire.

He groans and nods his head, "Very well. Jane is a witch." He informs her simply and she freezes before she turns her eyes on me. They are dark and vicious, but I can detect a tinge of fear.

I frown.

Before I have the time to speak, she turns on her heel and walks out of the room, slamming the door behind her.

Barnabas lowers his head in defeat and I turn my body towards him.

"Care to give me an explanation?" I whisper and he looks at me intently before he shakes his head slowly.

For the first time in weeks, he is the first to walk away from me. It hurts more than it should.

**End of chapter 14**

**Author's note: Thank you for reading. I hope you like it…Let me know please?**

**Any ideas why Carolyn reacted in such a way? Hint: remember the film and her reaction to Angelique. ;o)**

**Also, the story about the amethyst is true. It's an old Greek myth so, I did not make it up. :D**

**So, comments?**

**Xxx Lina ;o)**


	16. Chapter 15

**A/N: Welcome, welcome! How are you all? Well I hope.**

**I want to thank: XantheXV, MissMisc3, guest, Yarami, PGAEmma, TinkerbellxO, CharlieCats, Jandra1969, missyclone, dionne dance, Makrciana and Gary the Snail x3.**

**Thank you all for your comments!**

**I hope you enjoy this long chapter. ;o)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Chapter 15**

'_**Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; **_

_**Remember that what you have was once among the things you only hoped for.'**_

_**~Epicurus**_

My leg hurts when I stand up, but I don't care. I want to walk, stretch my muscles a little. The sky is overcast for the fourth day in a row and even if I love the sun I am thankful for the darkness the clouds veil us with. Maybe because it fits with my mood…Or maybe because I have grown attached to the darkness.

I lean on the furniture on my way to the large window and as soon as I am there I pull the curtains away. At first the only thing I see is the large open space of the garden and woods beyond it. I take a deep breath and open the window wide. The cool breeze hits my face as soon as I do so and I take a huge gulp of the evening air. The scent of rose blossoms prickles my nostrils and I smile. I close my eyes and step slowly out in the narrow balcony. My hands find the stone railing and I look down. I see a car entering the driveway and I tense up for a moment. The Chevrolet comes to a stop near the fountain and when the door opens and I see blond hair I calm down. Elizabeth gets out of the car and shuts the door before she is assaulted by a small figure. My lips curl into a smile when I see David. I have grown a fondness for the boy. Probably because he reminds me of myself. I was quiet like him when I was little…Maybe a little too quiet for my own good.

My leg throbs in protest as I am standing on it for too long and I quickly lean my weight towards my healthy one. I take a look at the two people and just as I am about to go back inside I hear melodious laughter. I pause and it is then that I notice that Elizabeth and David are not alone. The brown haired head of Victoria greets me and I tense up a bit. I blink and out of the corner of my eye I watch as Barnabas joins her. I take my time to study him next to her. He is standing with his chin up, his spine is a severe straight line and his hands are clasped behind his back. His posture speaks of refined politeness and he is a good distance away from her. It's as if he _has_ to look like that. It is as if he _has_ to be a gentleman in her presence. He has to charm her even when he knows that him and me already share a connection that not even my reluctance to be with him can compromise.

I don't know why, but I am suddenly weary of the scene. He is not that careful around me. He always finds a way to get closer. He always touches me and I am not sure how to take that. Is it so clear that I will fall with a single caress? Or maybe I did back then; in that life that I so desperately wish I can get to know more about.

"Jane!" Elizabeth's voice is kind, but loud and I inhale sharply at having been spotted spying on them like an intruder.

I look at the blonde and when she waves her hand at me I can't help but return it. As I move I wince and I quickly lower my hand back down.

David waves his hand as well and I can feel that Victoria and Barnabas are staring at me. Victoria's gaze doesn't linger, but the vampire's does.

Taking another last whiff of the roses' scent, I step back inside and pull the curtains closed. I leave the window open though because the smell coming in from the garden is soothing and grounding. It's my link with the outside world; a world I am too hesitant to reacquaint myself with.

I don't go back to the bed. I hate being in bed all day. Instead, I take a seat in an armchair. My room is really big. I have never stayed in such a big room before. My apartment was tiny. It was probably just twice the room I'm in. As I sit, I fold my good leg under my bottom and lean back. There are several books on the small table next to me and they are all daring me to open them.

I reach out and trail my finger down their spines. Some are novels, some are historical books and there is another one…I pause and pull it out a bit. The title is both in Latin and English and I frown a little.

_Veneficas: Incantamenta et Influentiam _

_Witches: Spells and Influence_

I quickly push the book away. How sly of him to slip me a book about witchcraft. I snort a little and shake my head. I entertain the thought of opening it; just out of curiosity, but I don't. I fear it will scramble with my head even more. The memories of what books such as this one can do frighten me and shake me to my very core. I imagine having the power to alter your life and the lives of others is just too tempting. The last thing I need is to start thinking like Angelique.

I put the book under the other ones and shake my head. No, thank you very much. I'd rather remain plain old Jane than load more problems onto my back.

I huddle against the armchair and I breathe a sigh of relief when the tension upon my ankle evaporates only to be replaced by a dull, but very faint throb.

A knock on my door makes me sit straight up once more and I turn to stare at it with reluctance. I gulp as a wave of dread and excitement rushes through me at the idea of him being here. I blink and lick my dry lips before I answer.

"Yes?"

The door is opened a moment later by Elizabeth. I almost breathe a sigh of relief, but at the same time an odd feeling twists my stomach into tiny knots of worry.

"May I come in?" She asks and I nod.

"Mrs. Stoddard." I lean forward, but she holds a hand up to stop me.

"Please, sit." She walks in, but doesn't close the door.

I catch sight of the long corridor and I wonder if there are more people out there.

"How are you? I saw you at the balcony. Is your leg better?" She asks as she looks down at me.

"It still aches, but it's definitely better." I reply quietly as I clasp my hands together upon my lap.

"Good, good."

"How is the business going? Have you found someone to assist you after I…" I trail off and she smiles a little.

"Barnabas has taken care of everything now…And no, the job position is still not covered…" She trails off and I nod.

Is that an invitation for me to fill it again or not?

"Have you eaten dinner? We are all about to have dinner in an hour." She starts as she walks over to the closet and opens it. When she finds it almost empty she clears her throat.

"If you want to come down, I can bring you some clothes…I imagine mine will fit you-…"

"I do not think it is necessary to come down…Your daughter…" I start with a big breath, "Your daughter feels as if I shouldn't be here."

She lets out a slow breath, "Carolyn?" she asks and I nod, "Carolyn is just a rebellious teenager, Jane. She has issues with most of the people in this house." She responds and I swallow thickly.

"I don't think that applies to me. My presence here is…a novelty and I should leave as soon as possible."

"Barnabas won't like the way you're thinking." She points out politely.

I look up at her and slowly I stand. I wince, but stay still.

"Mrs. Stoddard…how much do you know about me?" I ask her and she smiles.

"I know everything, dear. I suspect you don't wish us to get into irritating little details. I know everything that has happened and I still think that you're welcome here." she takes a step closer to me and I frown, "Barnabas has been very kind to us, Jane. He could have just ignored us…or he could have killed us in a heartbeat." She places her hand on my arm and I tense up a little. I had always thought her a very cold woman, but apparently I was wrong.

"But he didn't. He helped us. Our family has always been dysfunctional in one way or another." she drops her hand from my arm and starts pacing, "Curses, witches…vampires and ghosts have plagued this house." she turns to look at me from over her shoulder, "But with Angelique's death, everything will come back to normal. From what Barnabas has told me, you helped greatly. I can only offer my eternal gratitude." she takes a small breath and looks towards the half open door, "Barnabas is quite attached to you. I suppose so many months together have created a link…a _bond_." She enunciates the last word and I narrow my eyes.

_She knows. _

"And it is our fault you were caught in the witch's web. We have to remember that." She whispers.

"It's his fault, Mrs. Stoddard. Since you know everything you must know that their history had started centuries ago."

"Jane, her problem was not just with Barnabas. Barnabas rejected her, yes. But she scorned our family because we were better than her. She envied our wealth and hated the Collins because she thought they were the obstacle between her and Barnabas." Elizabeth shakes her head softly, "That was not his fault. It's not yours either."

I gulp, "I imagine you know of…"

"I know, yes." She walks closer to me, "And I have some advice." she stops and looks at me gently. "Don't try to fight it. It's inevitable. You are as necessary to him as the blood he needs to survive."

A sudden flush burns my skin and I gently nod my head, "You sure do know then…" I murmur, "As far as I know I was merely a caprice…"

"Then maybe you need to keep sleeping." She says with a knowing smirk and I almost gape at her.

I close my mouth and step closer, "Then you might also know about Ms. Winters." I say and she averts her eyes, "What about her? Does he need her to survive too?" I whisper and she stares at me before she puts her hand back on my arm.

"Then make him need her no more, Jane." She narrows her eyes at me and I blink.

"I am not a fighter, Mrs. Stoddard. I've never been one. Or rather, I didn't have to be one because I never had anything that I wanted to claim. And my head…" I pause and shake my head, "My head is so messed up right now that I wonder which of my two realities is imaginary and which is not."

"Then maybe you need time." she nods her head and steps back, "The first step is to step outside and I think you will enjoy a tour around Collinwood." she smiles and steps back, "I will get you clothes."

"I don't have time to…" I finger a lock of my hair, "I need to clean up."

"Then do so. Mrs. Johnson will be here to assist you…" she pauses, 'Or rather, she will be her usual slow moving self." She chuckles and I smile a little.

She offers me another nod and then she is gone. As she shuts the door, I briefly wonder if she knows what her daughter really is.

Frowning, I walk over to the window and shut it. With some difficulty I make my way into the bathroom.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

"David said you got lost." Carolyn speaks up as she and I are sitting in the long dinner table. David is across from me and he is playing with his linen napkin.

I look up at the young girl and smile a little, "I did. Doctor Hoffman found me wandering in the empty wing, "Don't ask how I arrived there." I mutter and Carolyn snorts.

"It's Julia, dear." The redhead calls from her seat as she takes small sips from a glass full of brandy.

I nod at her and nervously smooth my hands down the skirt Elizabeth gave me. It fits me like a glove and I have to wonder how it is possible for me to fit in it. She is curvier than me and that says a lot since she is rather slim as well.

"So, why don't you want to leave your room? Don't you like people or something?" Carolyn asks with a sneer and I look at her.

"Carolyn, please." Julia scolds and the young girl eyes her with a scowl.

"She is right." I murmur and Carolyn seems surprised by my response, "I fear a lot of things lately." I say as I lock eyes with her, "And I still haven't thanked you-…"

"Thank her for what?" Julia asks with a frown and I bite my tongue hard when I notice the expression on Carolyn's face. It looks like she wants to kill me.

"Um…" I stutter like a fool, but Elizabeth walks in just the right moment.

"For the clothes. She helped me choose them." She says, saving me from trouble and Carolyn eyes her mother with suspicion.

"What clothes, mother?" She drawls as she leans back in her seat and twirls her glass of milk in tiny circles. The drink sways precariously inside the glass, almost spilling over the rim.

"Carolyn." Elizabeth takes her seat at the head of the table.

"I thought Barnabas bought her the clothes. She's so tiny that yours would never fit." She mutters and I freeze.

I look down at my clothes and then at Elizabeth who has a resigned expression upon her features.

Now it makes sense why the clothes were so…me.

Barnabas chooses that moment to enter the room and trailing after him is Victoria. She is dressed in a pale purple dress and while she is as tiny as I am, her skin looks healthy and bright.

I almost cower in my seat, but then I remember the clothes and I look at him.

Our gazes lock and he pauses for a few seconds before he inclines his head and smiles at me.

"Jane." His dark gaze travels over the silk shirt I am wearing and I frown as his eyes linger on my collarbone. I brush my hand nervously over the neckline of the burgundy shirt and nod my head.

"Ms. Walden." Victoria nods at me with a smile and then takes her seat next to Julia.

"Ms. Winters." I murmur and she frowns.

"It's Vicky." She repeats the same line from the last time and I furrow my brow a little. Why does she keep saying that?

"So glad you decided to join us." she continues and I have to look at her, "I had hoped you'd join us today at the beach as well." She smiles and I clear my throat.

"I had no idea you'd be there. And I fear my leg wouldn't have agreed with the idea." I focus my gaze on my empty plate.

"Not a very sunny day for a beach stroll." Carolyn points out.

"Yes, indeed. It was rather windy." Julia joins in and I look up at the doctor. She smiles at me and takes another long sip from her glass.

"It was nice." David murmurs and I smile a little at him.

Carolyn snorts and a dead silence falls over the table until Elizabeth starts speaking.

"Ms. Walden, what do you think of the house?" She directs the question to me and I dread speaking at the moment.

All eyes are on me and I realize just now how antisocial I have become. I am actually ashamed of my desire to be alone.

"Um, I got lost." I evade the actual question because he must know how I feel about the house. One would think that I should know it by now. I've seen it countless times in my dreams after all.

There are chuckles all around the table and Barnabas slides his chair closer to mine. I only just now realized that I am strategically seated to his left.

"Yes, well, Collinwood is rather large. You shall need a proper tour." He eyes me and I take a deep breath.

I haven't talked to him in a day and I am suddenly nervous of any interaction with him. It's absurd when he is the only person I had close contact with for over seven months. I should like to think that I am just adjusting to the changes and new environment, but deep down I know that there is something wrong with me. It is not natural to feel so out of place…But I should feel out place. I don't belong with these people. They are family or in one way or the other connected with the family members.

Suddenly a cold hand is on top of my own and I startle. I look up and notice how surreptitiously Barnabas has placed his hand upon my own. Our hands are slightly covered by the napkin.

"Ah finally." Elizabeth exclaims as a man I have not seen before enters with a large tray of roasted beef.

"I thought you got lost, Willie." She says and he gives a tiny shrug before he walks out.

The fingers around my hand tighten and I look at Barnabas.

His eyes are intense and there is a small smile on his face; one that speaks of satisfaction and confidence.

"Do you like the clothes?" he murmurs and I tense up, "There are more waiting for you in my chamber."

I lick my lips and gently pull my hand away, "Thank you. But you didn't have to."

He lets out an amused chuckle and Victoria turns to look at us with curiosity.

"My dear, no matter how much I'd enjoy seeing you only in your nightclothes, I don't think it'd be prudent for the rest people in this house." He replies ever so quietly as he reaches out and places a generous amount of food in my plate.

No one comments on it, but I can see that some are surprised by his action; shocked even. When he tries to fill my glass with wine, I gently catch his wrist.

He gazes at me coolly and I slowly shake my head. He inhales sharply and as if reading my thoughts he quickly murmurs an apology.

I shift in my seat and try to eat the food, but by the fifth time I place the fork in my mouth I already feel ready to burst. I put the fork away and listen to the quiet conversations that take place, trying to distract myself from the very prominent urge to vomit.

I place my hand over my mouth as subtly as I can and I try to forget about my turning stomach by gazing at the wall paintings that are decorating the room. It works and as my eyes move over the vivid colors I can feel the nausea slipping away. I lower my hand from my mouth and I smile.

"Do you enjoy them, Jane?" Barnabas' voice breaks me from my staring and I turn to look at him. He looks proud and I nod.

"They're beautiful."

"Old is a better word." Carolyn matters as she plays with her food.

"Yes, these date back to the 1700s." He says as his dark eyes study the walls, "Beautiful craftsmanship." He turns and grins at me and I shift a little in my seat.

"Yeah, for a museum." Carolyn points out and Julia snorts at the comment while Victoria shakes her head.

"I find it fascinating." Victoria smiles and I look at her as she locks eyes with Barnabas who clears his throat and takes an unnecessary sip from his glass.

I look down at my half empty plate and pray for this to be over soon.

"You should have seen how lovely the sea was today." Victoria speaks up and I focus on the glass water bottle in front of me, "From our spot you could literally almost touch the peak at Widow's." she continues merrily and I take a deep breath as I gently finger the napkin that is upon my lap, "All I had to do was reach up." She giggles and my mouth twists a little in amusement.

Carolyn snorts and I can see Julia raising an eyebrow out of the corner of my eye. Barnabas however, has his eyes on her and there is a gentle smile upon his lips. He's humoring her. Of course.

"I gathered lots of seashells too…" David speaks up and I look at him, "You want to see them?" He asks me in a little whisper and I smile genuinely.

"Of course. I'd love to." I reply and his eyes light up.

"Right now?" He stands up from his seat and I chuckle.

"David, maybe Jane is not done with her dinner." Elizabeth starts slowly, but I am too eager to leave.

"No. No, I am done." I say as I stand, smoothing down my skirt as I do so.

I nod and my eyes lock with Barnabas' for a few seconds before I follow David out of the room.

A huge weight leaves my chest as I walk away.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

I am in the process of removing my skirt when a knock arrives on my door.

I pause and let go of the skirt before I turn to face the door.

"Yes?" I murmur and when the door opens I see Barnabas' face through the slit.

"May I come in?" he asks me softly and I blink.

"Of course. It's your house." I say as I eye him.

He enters and closes the door firmly. He leans against it for a few moments before he pushes away from it and approaches me.

His footsteps are slow, hesitant; as if he's approaching a startled animal and for some reason that angers me.

"Is there something wrong?" I ask and he comes to a stop just a few steps away from me. His nostrils flare as he inhales and I am suddenly too much aware of my few undone buttons. I reach up and try to close the shirt fully, but his hand closes around my own, preventing me from doing so.

I pause and eye him peculiarly.

"Thank you." He murmurs and I frown.

"For what?"

"For coming to eat with us. I didn't think you would accept." His voice is hoarse, but quiet and I swallow twice before I speak.

"Like you thought that I wouldn't accept the clothes? You didn't have to hide behind Elizabeth. I am not a fool. I knew the clothes were a little too right on me to be hers." I say and his hand abandons my own to touch my jaw instead.

"Jane…Why are you acting like this?" he murmurs and I shake my head.

"I will continue acting like this if you carry on treating me like a startled animal that needs to be petted and doted upon!"

His eyes darken, "To me you are as vulnerable as one. I only just now start to realize what those months with me have done to you." He steps closer and closes his fingers around my throat, but I am not scared.

"I am trying to adapt. But this is too much."

"What is?" He asks and I pause for a moment.

"This house, all these people… All the secrets. Doctor Hoffman's stares, Carolyn's dislike…You." I falter, "Victoria's resemblance to Josette. Everything." I reach up and curl my hand around his wrist, but he doesn't let go.

"Do you really think I was using you? Manipulating you so that I could benefit?" He asks me ever so quietly.

I freeze. I don't…I am not sure. Do I really think that? I look into his eyes and I know that he is not trying to use me. But he is trying to use those dreams in order to get closer to me. The question is why?

"You like Victoria." I say instead and he pauses.

"Pardon?"

"Why would you want to have me here when you obviously are so taken with her?"

His fingers slip away from my throat and he grasps my hand instead, "Jane…You…" he licks his lips, "Things have always been different between us. You and I…" he leans closer and places my hand on his waist as he slips his arm around my back, "You have been my one and only weakness." His eyes roam my face and I can already feel my cheeks getting warm.

"Why?" I ask because I have to know. I have to make sense of our strange relationship.

"I don't know." He replies with such honesty that I almost stumble back.

"You do not know." I repeat, "You know how that sounds, right?"

He frowns, "What?"

"It sounds pretty arrogant to me. You want my blood, but you want her as-…"

"I don't want your blood!" he cuts me off and I pause.

"No? I think you do. I can already see the effects the lack of it has on you." I shake my head, "Just admit that you want what we had back in that place. You want my compliance again. Admit it."

I can see his throat bobbing as he swallows and when he leans closer I am immediately assaulted by his scent.

"You always held the power in our relationship, Jane. I think that is rather obvious. The bond only functions when you want it. It feeds from your willingness. And your willingness, my dear, is oozing out of you in the exact same manner my desire oozes out of me." He inhales deeply and then cocks his head to the side, "You wanted the truth and here you have it. But if having what we had means that we have to go back to that place, then I'd rather die from thirst than wish for something that brings you such revulsion." His free hand curls around my head and I can feel his cool fingers in my hair as he pulls me closer.

"You always had trouble believing that I loved you-…"

"Stop." I shake my head at him, "Please. I don't even know you."

He frowns, "Jane, you're the only who ever knew me. You just have to remember me." His fingers tighten in my hair and I take a breath before I bite my lip.

"If I wanted to go…" He tenses up as I speak the words, "Would you let me?" I murmur and when he shakes his head in the negative I feel my stomach clenching. I don't know if it is dread or relief… or maybe both.

"No. Never." His voice is dark and smooth and I shudder as his lips brush against my forehead, "And with time you shall realize that you want the same." His fingers leave my hair and come to rest on my breast, right on top of my heart, "All you have to do is listen to your heart." He breathes and his breath brushes my lips as he speaks.

I swallow hard as he regulates his breathing so that his chest is moving in tandem with my heart. My mouth parts and I slowly shake my head.

'The problem is not listening to my heart, Barnabas." I lock eyes with him and he frowns through the haze in his eyes, "It's listening to my mind."

His expression doesn't change, but I can see his eyes dilating in hunger and I know that he has been thirsty for too long. Making a decision that I might regret in the future, I lean my weight into him. I breathe a sigh of relief as I do so because my ankle doesn't hurt so much like this. I slip a hand up his chest and when my fingers are on the back of his neck I lean closer. His nose finds the skin of my neck and he skims my pulse spot with his lips before he leans further into me. His arms tighten around my waist and I tighten my fingers in his hair in response.

A low growl vibrates in his chest and in a flash I can feel his teeth on my neck. A groan escapes me as he pierces through the skin, but then all I can feel is his lips and tongue. My eyes widen and when he applies suction my eyes drift shut. I can barely feel his teeth on my skin as he drinks and this act feels even more intimate than any kiss, embrace or stare anyone can ever offer. There is a hand cradling the back of my head and another one is firmly clasping my lower back.

My reckless impulse starts to feel rather dangerous when I start getting dizzy and I tense up. His arms flex around me and then his tongue is upon the incisions, gently tending to them until the sting of his saliva turns into a dull throb that matches the rhythm of my heart.

His lips are upon my ear then and I can hear his rapid breathing mirroring my own.

My fingers curl around his clothes and his hands are on my hips, his fingertips gently massaging me through the fabric of my skirt.

I slowly open my eyes, but I am still dizzy. The room is a blurred image around me and I close them again. My face finds refuge in the crook of his neck and he groans softly as he closes his arms around me.

"Jane." He murmurs hoarsely as he presses his face against my hair, "My darling Jane-…"

"Jane? It's time for your-…Oh." Julia enters without knocking- or perhaps she did knock and I didn't hear her-with a bottle of pills in her hand.

Barnabas whirls around to face her with me still in his arms and the movement makes me even dizzier.

"Barnabas? Is that…Is that blood on your lips?" She whispers in shock as she slams the door shut.

"Doctor, lower your voice." He says and I try to move back, but my vision is too blurry and I stumble.

"I told you that you mustn't do something that…Jane, are you alright?" Julia asks and I look up.

"Yes…I…"

Barnabas' hands steady me and I look up at him, but I can already feel my knees getting rather weak.

"Jane?" he murmurs with wide eyes and I can see fear in his eyes, but I cannot speak because everything starts spinning.

"I told you she is weak! What on earth have you done to her?" Julia's voice is distant and by the time Barnabas gets to answer her, my eyes have rolled to the back of my head. All I know is darkness.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_I open my eyes when I feel hands on my shoulders. I startle and look down. I stare as one of his hands slips towards my collarbone and when I notice the ring I realize immediately who is behind me. I swallow hard because even in my sleep my head is still spinning from his lips and teeth. I can feel the fingers of his free hand brushing over my neck and I briefly wonder if he can feel the bite marks there. As he slips closer to me from behind, I am certain that he cannot._

"_Jane." His voice is much smoother and his hands are warm as they touch me, "Thank you for coming." He sighs with something that sounds suspiciously close to relief and when his fingers curl around the necklace on my neck, I look down._

"_I knew it'd look lovely on you." I can almost hear his smile and I take my time to study the stone that is resting almost regally upon my chest. It is uneven, almost raw looking and I smile a little because it's beautiful in a wild way._

"_It's a rough amethyst. Unrefined one would say…" he slowly walks around so he is facing me and when he is in front of me, he smiles warmly, "Like you." His fingers brush my jaw and I take a step back._

"_I suppose I am…when compared to you." I murmur and he laughs._

_He stops at my expression and slowly shakes his head, "I was referring to its beauty." he says quietly, "Shall we walk?"_

"_It's too late for walks in the woods." I say and he purses his lips._

"_Indeed." he murmurs and then offers me his hand, "Do you want to come inside? Please?" He suggests and I suddenly realize that we are standing in front of the gates of Collinwood. _

_I swallow hard._

"_I have no place inside, sir-…"_

"_Barnabas. Please." he cuts me off, "Please. Your insistence on standing on ceremony in my presence hurts me, Jane." He steps closer and takes my hand. I let him because his gaze is not letting me do otherwise. How on earth can he compel me to do things with just his gaze? It's still a mystery to me._

"_I still don't understand what you want from me." I reach up and just because it feels like the right thing to do, I pull the necklace away from my neck, "I have to give this back."_

_He grabs my wrist in a firm grip and uses it to yank me closer. I gasp because he has never been this rough before. He's always so refined and polite._

_I stare up at him with shock and I can see that he's running out of ideas on how to make me stay. Why does he even want me to stay? That is what I don't understand._

"_Is it so difficult for you to stop wounding me?" he murmurs and I gulp, "Isn't it obvious what I want?" He hisses and a gentle wind sweeps his hair away from his forehead. I can smell his cologne and it is clouding my senses._

"_I won't sleep with a betrothed man." I murmur and his gaze softens._

"_Jane," he leans towards me and tilts my head up with his free hand, "I don't want you to sleep with me." He shakes his head, "I want you to be mine. Forever." He breathes and then his lips are on mine, stealing my breath away. My eyes widen minutely and when he wraps an arm around my waist and pulls me closer, my heart lurches inside my chest, as if eager to burst right out of my body. Fingers are on my face and hair and when he pushes me backwards and my back finds the iron gates, I gasp. He groans and his fingers thread through my strands, twitching violently around them in his attempt to deepen the kiss. His nose brushes mine as he changes the angle of the kiss and when his lips part wide over my own, I groan. My skin prickles with warmth as the kiss turns more passionate and when his teeth bite down on my lip, I gasp. He pulls away and focuses on my jaw instead, but I am as breathless and dizzy as I was while awake. His mouth is moist and scorching at the same time and when his lips find the skin of my cheek I sigh. His hands abandon the iron gates which he had been clasping tightly and take the necklace from my hand. Without parting from my skin, he secures it around my neck again and then he leans down to kiss me once more._

"_You ground me, Jane." He murmurs against my mouth as his hands return on the iron bars behind me, using them to trap me, "Don't ever refuse my tokens of affection again. I beg you." _

_His words startle me and I make it known._

"_Are you always this…possessive with your things, my lord?" I ask because his gaze is too dark to be safe. _

_He blinks and as he does so, his gaze softens, "Jane…Forgive me if…You are not one of my things." he shakes his head adamantly, "Have I made you feel like one?" He asks me with genuine surprise and I hesitate._

_I am not sure. I've never been treated as something precious before. The truth is that I don't know how I should feel; offended or flattered…Maybe both._

_I swallow and place my hand over the necklace, "You do know that you cannot be seen with me…yes? I am not like you. I could never be." I say instead and he stares at me for a while before he blinks and smiles gently._

"_That is why you're important. That is why I-…" His words are cut off by a quiet murmur._

"_Master?"_

_My eyes widen when I hear the voice and I can see him tensing up._

"_Who is that? Should I call the guards?" Angelique's voice is almost worried- almost- but before I have the chance to move Barnabas' hand firmly pushes me out of the way and far away from the gates._

"_It's nothing." He says in a firm voice and I am thankful of the bushes that are obscuring me, "Return back inside." He tells her, but I can't hear her walking._

"_I was certain I saw something-…"_

"_Angelique. Go back inside." He cuts her off and I can feel my heart beating wildly against my chest._

_She pauses and the she speaks again, "Will you join me tonight? Tomorrow's my free day-…"_

"_Didn't you hear what I said? Please, don't ever speak to me in such a manner ever again."_

_My eyes are wide at the implication of the witch's words, but I should have suspected that something was going on between them. That is why she hated me so much. She knows, she suspects; she just hasn't seen me yet._

"_But I-…" She stops herself and I can see Barnabas glaring at her._

_It takes her a few moments to walk away and when she does, he turns to look at me._

"_I am so sorry-…"_

"_Good night." I mutter before I turn to walk away._

_As I do so, the ground underneath me moves and I am suddenly stepping on thin air._

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

I wake up on my bed and I slowly stretch. My neck itches a bit and my ankle still throbs dully, but I am no longer dizzy. As I shift, something cold and heavy jingles in my hand and I pause.

I open my eyes fully and look down. The amethyst necklace is resting on my palm. I gasp and look up only to find Barnabas next to me.

"I have kept it on me for centuries." he murmurs and I swallow hard, "Always on me." His dark eyes find mine and I blink.

"Why are you giving it to me now?" I ask and he takes a deep breath.

"Because it's yours and yours alone." His calm reply is soothing and I nod.

"I see…"

"Jane," he takes my hand and eyes my neck, "You have to forgive me…I shouldn't have…"

I sit up and shake my head, "I let you, but I cannot regret it because you…need to…" I trail off and he is quick to fill the silence.

"There are other ways. Julia is right…I cannot behave like an-…"

A knock on the door cuts him off and he grits his teeth.

"Yes?" I call and Willie walks in with a small box in his hand.

"This came in for Ms. Walden." He announces almost boringly and I frown.

"What?" Barnabas mutters as he stands and my frown deepens.

No one knows I am here…How is that possible?

"Give it here." Barnabas takes it from him and eyes the small brown parcel with suspicion. He raises his eyes to mine and as our gazes lock I know that something is not right.

As his fingers tear through the paper I am holding my breath, and when he opens it and freezes, I know that something is wrong. Terribly wrong.

I sit up and take it from him. At first he doesn't let me, but when I try again he does so with little resistance.

Inside the small box is a lock of blond hair; drenched in blood. From the look on Barnabas' face I can tell that the blood belongs to me.

_God._

**End of chapter 15**

**Author's note: Phew! Still here? Great! Thank you for reading! So, comments, please? They are my only payment!**

**Jane's necklace can be found on my Facebook page and Tumblr.**

**Until next time!**

**Xxx Lina ;o)**


	17. Chapter 16

**A/N: Hello and welcome back!**

**I want to thank: Yarami, Jandra1969, MissMisc3, Makrciana, XantheXV, Gary the Snail x3, ForeverACharmedOne, dionne dance, lottielovebuzz and PGAEmma. You are all awesome!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

_***This chapter is dedicated to Dionne Dance because she is sick. **** Hope you feel better soon.***_

* * *

**Chapter 16**

_**Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future.**_

_**~Oscar Wilde**_

"I just don't see who could have sent this." Elizabeth says as I stand by the door. Barnabas is sitting behind his desk, his hand on his chin as he watches me and then Elizabeth with a small frown.

"I don't know who sent this, Elizabeth." he starts quietly, "All I know is that it's meant to scare us." He murmurs and I clear my throat.

"Me, you mean. Whoever it is wants to scare _me_." I correct and Barnabas' eyes flash up to mine so suddenly that I blink to clear my vision.

"Forgive me if I see it as personal offence." He whispers darkly and I avert my eyes because his gaze is saying too much, proves too much.

I sigh and cross my arms over my chest, ignoring the dull throbbing of my foot because we have more serious problems now. Problems that I have caused… Probably.

"Could it be her?" Elizabeth asks, her voice strained as if she hates speaking the words and both Barnabas and I look at her.

"Her? Angelique?" Barnabas cocks an eyebrow, "There is not a chance. I killed her. I told you." He shakes his head and I clear my throat again.

Two pairs of eyes turn on me and I take a step forward.

"I don't think we've thought this through." I start softly, "She was a witch, yes…But it seems to me that she had to be more. How else did she survive for so many centuries? She was ageless, yes?" I turn my eyes on Barnabas who is looking at me closely now.

"Indeed…" His gaze flickers to Elizabeth for a moment before he focuses on me again, "Are you speaking of demons?" He asks me and then his eyes are drawn to my neck. They zero on a particular spot and I blink, momentarily confused.

_What?_

I look down and I notice that my fingers are wrapped around the necklace he gave me earlier.

I flush a little, but I don't pull my hand away. I need something to ground me and holding the cold stone is working. I should be surprised, but I am not. He is after all my only constant security line these past months.

"I am not sure…Until a few months ago I believed that magic…and creatures of the night were just fairytales, conjured up to scare little children…But now I know that is not true." I say and Elizabeth nods her head.

"So what do you think? Tell us." She urges and I can see that she is trying to make me slide out of my shell…and it is working.

"Well, what if her body died, but not her soul-…"

"That thing had _no_ soul!" Barnabas explodes as he stands up abruptly and in a flash he is in front of me, "She didn't know what the word meant." He shakes his head, "And she made me one too." He mutters and I blink.

"I don't think…" I trail off as Elizabeth clicks her tongue and approaches us.

"Let her talk, Barnabas." She places a hand on his arm and he growls, but nods his head at her.

I take a deep breath, "So, if her…spirit lived on…and the…" my eyes flicker towards Barnabas, "The werewolf…If he's still alive…he might want to avenge her…" I finish and I don't say more, saving another thought for later.

"Edon?" Barnabas murmurs, "Of course…"

"Werewolf? There was another werewolf?" Elizabeth exclaims and both Barnabas and I turn to look at her.

"Yes…I thought Carolyn had told you." Barnabas mutters with confusion.

"Barnabas, my daughter doesn't speak to me. Surely you have gathered as much." She murmurs and her voice is tinged with a tiny speck of disappointment.

I suddenly realize that apparently Carolyn is not just rude with strangers and people she doesn't know; she is distant even to her own mother. I cannot fathom such a thought. I'd give anything to see my mother again. I'd give anything for one loving embrace.

"Yes, well…" Barnabas clears his throat nervously and I speak up again.

"I saw how the werewolf was looking at her…He must have been very close to her…That gives me another thought." I whisper as I look at Barnabas.

His gaze is intense, "Yes. What thought?"

"Well, from what I have come to understand, she lived for…" I trail off trying to do the math, but he beats me to it.

"Over two hundred years." He murmurs.

"Yes…during those years she must have made some friends…lovers…And those friends couldn't possibly be mortal people, could they?" I venture and Elizabeth gasps.

"You think she has an army of…werewolves?" She asks as her wide eyes fall on Barnabas.

Barnabas lifts his hands up in a soothing manner, "Elizabeth, please. We are simply discussing the possibilities and I have to admit that Jane is right. We must consider the possibility that she was not working alone…It would be impossible." he says quietly, "She must have had allies…Allies she herself created…Like she created me." He looks down and Elizabeth nods her head.

"Like she _created_ my daughter…Cursed is a more appropriate word." She mutters darkly and I realize that she knows everything about her daughter…Like she should.

"So," she starts, "What do we do?" She asks soberly and Barnabas pauses for a moment, his lips pursed in indecision.

"Do you think Carolyn would be open to a little trip?" He murmurs and I look at him with wide eyes.

"What trip?" I ask quickly, the words tumbling out of my mouth before I can stop them.

His eyes turn on me and they soften, "Nothing for you to worry about. I simply want to go back to that place. Maybe whoever it is will still be there." He says and Elizabeth gives a tiny shrug.

"I never know her mood…I shall ask then." She quietly excuses herself and walks out of the study, leaving us alone.

"No one will be there." I say and the instinctive urge to prevent them from going is already gnawing at my insides.

"The werewolf didn't seem too bright, Jane. You never know." He pauses and regards me carefully before his lips break into a smile, "You worry about me, don't you?" He murmurs confidently, taking a step closer.

"Yes." I find no reason to lie. Of course I worry about him…He…he has come to be the center of my life whether I want it or not. He is the reason I am alive today. He's been my life line and I want to think that I have been his as well.

"You mustn't. I am strong. That reminds me," He places his hands on my arms and strokes them gently, "Julia wants to talk to you about something…"

"What about?" I ask and he clears his throat.

"Well, after what she saw, she has an idea of how to help us…Um, me." He smiles a little and I frown.

"Oh, alright. I will go to her." I nod my head and he leans in to kiss my cheek, but I stop him, "I want to tell you something."

He pauses and he looks disgruntled by my avoidance, but nods in acceptance.

"Of course. What is it?" His fingers hook under my chin and he lifts my face up before he leans in. His mouth finds the corner of my own and he breathes a kiss there, unfazed by my previous dodge.

I let him and I am momentarily distracted by the feeling of his mouth on my own. My hands reach up and curl around the lapels of his suit jacket and he exhales contentedly against my face as he leans his forehead against mine.

"Jane," he murmurs as his hands coil around my back, "I want you to always be like this with me." He breathes quietly and I open my eyes.

I don't reply to that and he kisses my forehead before he pulls back to look at me.

"Now tell me." His nostrils flare as they get a whiff of my scent and I watch the slow bob of his throat before I speak.

"I had a dream once…" I start and he takes my hands in his.

"What dream?"

"Back when we were in that place…During the first weeks…I had a dream about you and me." I raise my eyes to his and I find him watching me closely, a furrowed brow the proof of his concern.

"Yes? Of the past or…?" He trails off and I gulp.

"Of the future. I found myself in this…large construction site. It was night and I was alone." I lick my dry lips because I am not sure if I should be saying this. What if my words alter our lives? Our fate? Our future?

"And?" He presses on when I remain quiet for a long time.

"I was wandering around until I heard something from behind me. I turned and there was this man…" I pause to gather my thoughts because the dream is old and I barely remember all the details.

"A man?" his voice is a low growl of displeasure and I nod.

"He had…striking red eyes…and like you, he could compel others. He compelled me in my dream."

It's true that what I remember most vividly are his eyes.

"Compel? He was a vampire?" Barnabas asks me and I nod.

"Yes…He attacked me, claiming that he longed to kill me because of her…I didn't know then who _she_ was, but now everything makes sense. I think he meant Angelique and I think that he is the one behind the package." Cold fear grips me because I remember the ferocity of the man's gaze. Good God, that had been the most frightening dream of my life.

"A vampire?" Barnabas' voice is incredulous, "But…"

"Maybe you were not the only vampire she made…And who tells us that she made him? There must be others like you out there. Either way, I think this is a clue. I didn't want to say it in front of Elizabeth."

I see him processing my words and finally he narrows his eyes, "Jane, you might be right. But how can we know that your visions of the future are real? What if they are conjured up by our situation? Our choices, just now, may have already altered the future you've seen." He tries to reason and he is right, of course he is right. Maybe it's all in my mind…But what about the past?  
"You think the same about the dreams I have about the past? The ones we share?" I ask him hesitantly and he looks shocked.

"No! Jane, I know you're not paranoid…I know it. I am just saying that maybe some of our decisions will alter the future you've seen." His hands squeeze mine and I nod.

"Of course…I can simply say that the future is currently working in your favor…My visions of it at least." I mutter as I recall the bite marks on my chest and my talks with the doctor.

"What?" He asks as he lets go of my arms to look at me better.

Suddenly, color makes me hot and I avoid his gaze, "I am talking about the bond, Barnabas.'

He inhales deeply at the use of his name and my heart clenches violently as his eyes shimmer hopefully.

"The bond?" he breathes, a dazed look on his face as his eyes study my face and neck.

"Yes…" I murmur, "And you should be looking," I point with my finger on my right breast, "here." I finish and his eyes zero on the spot. His mouth falls open as he takes long gulps of air even though I know he doesn't need them.

"Oh…Did I…" His voice fails him and he tries again in a one more nervous tone than my own, "Did I force you?" He whispers and the doubt in his words unsettles me.

"No! Of course not." I blurt out and he looks relieved while I start to feel anxious, "You'd never do that, right?"

His eyes snap up to mine and he shakes his head, "Not if I can help it…"

I move my hands away from his and his face falls, "What do you mean?" I whisper.

He gulps and moves closer, "Jane, I could never hurt you. I couldn't…But sometimes the bond…dictates things. I might not be able to stop if we start…" he trails off, "Well, you know."

"Oh…I see." I mutter, "Can you tell when the need to complete it is near? A-and will I feel it too?" I ask because I have to know.

He looks lost, as if he doesn't know what to say and finally shakes his head, "I'm not sure, darling." He murmurs and I take a deep breath.

"Okay…" I nod and offer a tiny smile, "I suppose I should go see Doctor Hoffman." I clear my throat and as I try to move back, he takes hold of my wrist.

"Jane." He murmurs as his eyes fall on my lips.

I blink, "Yes?"

"Are you sleeping at all?" He whispers with concern and I tense up.

"A little-…"

"Liar." He cuts me off and my shoulders drop.

"Since you know, why do you ask?"

"Talk to the doctor about it. She might help you…And please, leave your door unlocked at night." He pleads and I smile a little nervously.

"So you can slip in? I thought you were strong enough to fight with a lock." I keep my voice light, but his gaze is serious.

"My strength is you, Jane. Don't exclude me, I beg you. Maybe I can help." He tries to lock eyes with me and I oblige him.

He smiles and I return it.

"How's your foot?" He asks me instead, quickly changing the subject and I look down at my ankle.

"Better…I should go."

He drops my hand after kissing it chastely and then takes a step away from me.

"Alright."

I give one last nod and turn to go.

"Jane," His voice makes me pause with my hand on the doorknob, "I won't let anyone hurt you. Ever."

I turn to look at him and my heart feels like it's about to burst right out of me. My fingers tighten around the knob and I smother the urge to bury myself into his arms because I am too bloody embarrassed to do so. I am still fighting with my hesitation to show intimacy to him, but deep down I want to. There's a fire burning my insides when he is near, but I am a damn coward and I hold back; I always hold back.

I settle for a nod, a wide smile- well, as wide as I can manage- and two whispered words.

"I know."

With that, I turn and exit the study.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

The needle is sharp and I wince as it pierces my skin.

"Ow!" I turn my head away as Doctor Hoffman-Julia, as she insists that I should call her- connects the tube to my arm and starts taking my blood.

I always had an aversion to needles. Not because of the sting or potential pain, but my stomach always complained when I had to look at the long sharp object.

I shudder and breathe in through my nose as she carries on with her work. Now I understand how Barnabas had all those blood bags in my dreams. It was because Julia was taking my blood and storing it for him in her office, away from the curious eyes of Victoria and David.

I suppose it is a good solution and a less emotional one. It's a win- win situation and I should be glad, but I just feel empty.

_It's just the bond, you fool. Get over it._ My inner voice decides it is time to speak up and I quickly hush it.

"Just one moment and we'll be done, dear. Feeling alright?" The redhead asks and I nod, offering her a smile.

"Good…" She quickly pulls the tube away from my arm and promptly places a piece of cotton over the punctured skin, "Hold it there for a second, will you?" She smiles at me and quickly starts fumbling with the blood and tubes.

I look away and take a deep breath. I am surprised when I don't feel too lightheaded. I suppose I am getting a little stronger.

"You should eat and drink something after this…" Julia looks up and frowns, "I was told you're not sleeping…"

My eyes snap up to hers, "That's true…" I mutter.

"Barnabas told me. He guards you like a bloody lion guards his pack…" She is amused, but then she sobers up, "Anyway, might I suggest some chamomile or some milk before bed?"

I snort, "I am sorry, Julia, but that is not helping. I will get around it eventually though."

Julia removes her glasses and regards me cautiously, "There are some mild anti-depressants I can give you. They are not heavy or anything. They will help you relax." She walks to her desk and open a drawer. She pulls out a bottle of pills and hands them to me.

"Lexotanil. A very light anxiolytic. It doesn't induce sleep, but it helps you relax…Especially with your hurt foot and all." She smiles at me reassuringly and I take them with a hesitant hand.

I regard them critically. I am reluctant to use them and I probably won't.

"Thanks." I mutter and she smiles.

It is odd how quickly she found these pills…I have a suspicion that she is probably using them herself, but I don't voice my thoughts because it is not my problem. I used to take pills when I was suffering from insomnia…I shouldn't be one to talk about addiction to medicine.

"Wonderful." Julia's response is cheery as she shuts her desk drawer and looks at me and then at the darkening sky outside her window.

"How are things? Been feeling any better?" She asks me casually and I look up at her.

"I suppose…" My response is timid, hesitant because the last thing I need or want is for her to analyze me like in that dream I had…No, I won't stand for it because I already know what's wrong with me.

My problem is him…and I am not sure if it's a problem I'd like to get rid of. It is a wonder how quickly my image of him has changed over the last few months. From the stranger, the distant manager of the Collins' business, he has become the man to whom I have attached myself with. I want to laugh at the irony and I try to forget the fact that his early behavior didn't match with all the things we have gone through together. Disregarding his pretence of not knowing me is not easy, but then again I would never believe him if he tried to explain things to me.

"Jane?" Julia is waving her fingers in front of my face and I blink, causing her to let out a chuckle.

"Thank God. I though I hypnotized you there for a second." She mutters and I frown.

_What?_

"What?" I voice my question and I can see that she is holding a pocket watch in her hand, twirling the large chain around her fingers.

"I thought you'd be familiar with the concept of it." She says and I shake my head.

"Of course…You use that…on people?" I ask and she shrugs before she pockets the watch.

"Oh well, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't."

My eyes follow the vanishing item and then I look up at her.

"I see…I wonder if that actually helps." I muse out loud and she frowns.

"Sorry?"

"Hypnotism." I clarify as I flex my arm and put the pills in my pocket, "Psychologically. Does it help? I mean, do the patients get better after it, or is it just a way for you to find out their secrets by making them think that you're using an approved method of therapy?" I don't know why my question is laced with such animosity, but as I think about it, it does seem rather pointless. How would hypnotism help patients if they didn't even remember what they said and how they replied to the questions?

Julia seems to tense up at that and her eyes narrow as she gazes at me.

"It's a way to get things out of their chests… Emotions they have locked up for years…It allows them to speak about things that they'd never dare speak about otherwise." She defends and I nod.

"I see…And they would remember?" I ask and her eyes narrow even more as she further witnesses my doubt.

"That is immaterial because after their confessions I'd be able to help them talk about traumatic subjects." She stiffly places the glasses back on her nose and regards me coolly.

"You'd help them by lying." I mutter and she snorts.

"You've obviously never dealt with troubled people." She murmurs and I blink.

"On the contrary, doctor. I have. I have to deal with myself every day…Like most of us. All of us are troubled, but some things must always remain hidden. It's better that way." I say as I slide down from the medical bed. I lower my sleeve and regard her softly.

"I suppose I need one bag." I look at my blood and she lingers for a moment before she turns away.

"Alright, just a moment." She turns her back on me and I watch as she moves around. I have obviously upset her, but why? Have I hit a nerve maybe? Who knows? Nevertheless, I feel obliged to apologize and so I do.

"I am sorry if I upset you. I was merely curious." I call and she looks at me from over her shoulder.

"No worries, dear. Psychology in general is a very complex and relatively novel science…It needs practice in order to see which methods are effective and which are not."

"Right. Not so long ago, they were locking psychologically ill people into tiny rooms as a form of therapy." I mutter and she turns to me with a blood bag ready in her hand.

"That still happens, dear. Ignorance is not always bliss." She hands me the bag and I take it as I pick up my light cardigan. I thrust it under the soft material and make my way towards the door.

"Jane." She calls just before I leave and I turn to look at her, "Let me know about your sleep, yes?" She smiles a tight lipped smile and I only nod before I walk out, closing the door behind me.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

I almost get lost as I make my way up the stairs. I am glad that it is almost evening and David won't be lurking about in the halls. Last thing I want is for him to see me carrying a blood bag under my cardigan.

My shoe thuds gently onto the last step and I nervously peer down the hall that leads to Barnabas' room. My eyes widen when I see Victoria already standing outside of his door. I gasp and hide behind the wall, my heart thudding inside my chest and I hold my breath as she knocks on his door.

He doesn't take long to answer.

"Oh-…Victoria." His voice is rushed and a little surprised. It doesn't sound like he is expecting her and my eyes narrow.

"I was finishing up with David's homework and I thought that you might want to join me in the parlor." Her voice is timid and ever so polite and I wait for his response. I already know that he'll accept anyway-…"

"I am going to retire early tonight, I fear. I have some business to take care of…Perhaps some other night, my dear." He declines politely and I am shocked.

"Oh…Alright." She stumbles over the word and my curiosity is prickled by her awkward reply. Quietly, and knowing full well that I risk to be exposed spying on them, I lean forward and look at them.

Victoria is a step away from the door and Barnabas is standing under the threshold, barricading the way with his stiff posture.

"Goodnight then." She mutters and I quickly move forward as if I've only just arrived.

Victoria startles when she sees me and murmurs a quick hello before she brushes past me in quick strides.

I falter as I hear Barnabas' sigh and when she's gone I turn to look at him. His eyes are on the floor, but when they lock with mine they are dark and gentle.

"Jane." He mouths my name and I swallow hard as I approach him.

"Um…I heard you want to rest so, I just wanted to give you this." I slowly show him the bag and his eyes widen at the sight of it.

His nostrils flare and he reaches out. I am ready to relinquish my hold on the bag and go to my own room, but then his hand doesn't touch the bag. His fingers curl around my wrist instead.

I look up and inhale sharply at the feeling of his cool skin on my wrist.

"I don't rest." he murmurs and I raise my eyes to his, "Will you come in?" He asks me quietly and I hesitate briefly before I nod.

He doesn't take the blood from me. He simply steps to the side to let me pass, his expression hopeful and content as I walk through.

He closes the door and I don't comment on the fact that he also locks it.

"I suppose you wish me to stay." I say with a nervous chuckle when I hear the click of the lock.

When I turn to look at him, he seems slightly embarrassed, a fact he tries to hide by smoothing a hand over his thick robe.

"Wish is not an appropriate word." he starts casually and then his eyes are on mine, dark and glimmering, "I need you to stay."

I stop my sharp breath in time and place my cardigan on the settee by window.

"You wanted company…I am not good company." I raise my eyes back to his, "Why did you sent her away?" I ask before I can stop myself, "It's because you heard me, right?" I mutter and his eyes narrow.

"Victoria won't ever understand this." He steps in front of the full body mirror across from him and slides easily to his right. He has no reflection and I raise a hand to my mouth to hide my chuckle.

His mouth twists in amusement too, but then a thought comes to me.

"She doesn't know what you are then?"

He simply shakes his head in the negative.

"Why does she think I'm here then?" I ask the question and I dread the answer.

"She knows we were locked away…She just doesn't know what exactly is between us." He replies and I swallow.

"What is between us?"

He looks wounded by my comment, "Why did you come here if you don't know?" he dodges my question and I fight for the right words.

"I thought you'd be …thirsty." I say at last, ignoring how ridiculous it sounds even to my own ears.

Barnabas doesn't move for a moment and when he does, he does so with leisure.

His hand curls around his food and I let go, quickly hiding my hand behind my back.

"Please, sit." He tells me almost breathlessly and I do so. I take a seat on the comfortable bed and place my hands on either side of my thighs as I take a look around. His room looks exactly like it does in my dreams. I am amazed.

I hear him placing the blood on his nightstand and before I can blink there are fingers on my face and knuckles grazing my cheek.

I blink and look up at him.

"You look tired. You must sleep." He murmurs quietly as his cool fingers roam my face with a silent hunger that I can almost taste on every breath I take.

"I feel tired." I nod and then his hand is on my forehead, feeling my skin.

"Are you dizzy?"

I shake my head and he smiles. On an impulse I take his hand and he startles so much that he stumbles and falls next to me onto his stomach.

I laugh and his mouth twitches in amusement as he watches me. His hand is on my jaw then, moving gently down my neck, over the barely visible, but extremely tiny marks there.

I shiver and when his eyes follow his wandering hand I let out a deep breath. His fingers briefly brush over the top of my breast in a curious manner and then the pale cold fingers wrap around my neck. Using gentle force he pushes me down and then his hands fall on the buttons of my shirt.

My eyes go wide as he undoes them with ease, but his gaze is focused on my face. How on earth can he do that?

I allow him to push back the material and when he pulls back to shrug out of his own robe, I clear my throat.

"What have you decided?" I ask and my eyes momentarily fall on his pale chest as he comes to lean over me again.

He wraps an arm around my waist and lifts me up easily, cradling me to his hard chest as he drapes the robe around my thin shoulders.

"Jane…" he murmurs, "You need to eat more. I will beg you if I have to." He tells me worriedly and I quickly nod.

I already know that.

"Promise me." He shakes me a little and I blink.

"I promise."

He grins and then lets me slide down on her mattress again. His hands go to my hips and when he starts to finger the waistband of my pants I reach out and stop his hand.

He looks up.

"You never answered me." I tell him and he frowns.

"We have decided to go check the area…" He starts as I pull the robe around my front and sit up slightly.

"You do know what the funny thing is, right?" I murmur and he swallows hard.

"What?"

"That we were right in front of your family's nose." I whisper and he lets out a humorless laugh.

"Indeed. Hiding in the rocks below Widow's Peak is not a place Elizabeth would look first."

I look away at that. It's extremely sick and awful when you think about it.

"Carolyn will come with me…But it has to happen at night, when the moon will be high in the sky so we can see." He adds and I look at him.

Feeling strange at the prospect of him returning to that tomb, I look at the bag on his nightstand.

"Won't you…?" I trail off and his eyes darken for a moment before he shakes his head.

"You'll go to sleep first." He murmurs and I laugh a little at that.

"I can't-…"

His fingers land on my lips and I am silenced as he leans down. His eyes lock with mine and then his finger is on my nose. He brushes it up and down the bone and I am distracted by the movement.

I try to follow his finger with my eyes and his laughter is warm as he shakes his head in amusement

"Jane."

I don't know how he manages it, but he succeeds in making me lie down properly. My head finds his pillow and it's soft, too soft for my heavy head.

I am pretty sure I want to yawn as he keeps up the gentle motion with his finger and I do so. His only response it to laugh.

I smile a little and then I feel his lips on my jaw. The finger on my nose stops moving and then I feel his tongue lightly brushing over the corner of my mouth, timidly finding the seam of my lips and slipping through for a deeper kiss.

My lips are pliable under his and I part my mouth to allow him in. I don't know if he is surprised or not, but his lips move more eagerly over mine, moulding over my mouth until I am almost certain that I could not possibly tell where his end and where mine begin.

My hand finds the nape of his neck and I hold him there as he devours my lips. His hand slips around my side and curls over my ribs just under my breast in a firm grip.

I gasp a little and he pulls back, his breathing hard and uneven.

His mouth, now warm from our kiss, finds my brow and he kisses it before he pulls back. I can feel the moist touch even as he is gone from my skin and I shiver, wanting, but hesitating to curl myself around him.

I am too drowsy to open my eyes and so, I simply keep my hand on his neck, my fingertips lightly brushing over the soft hair there.

"Sleep." His voice is soothing yet hoarse and my hand drops from his short hair as he pulls back. Something warm is draped over me a moment later and then I hear his footsteps as he walks around his room.

I am barely awake, but I am certain that I can hear the quickening of his breathing as soon as his hand touches the bag that contains my blood.

As I fall asleep, I have the feeling that it will be the first time that I won't dream…But I am wrong.

**End of chapter 16**

**Author's note: Yep, no dream scene this time. I am saving it for next time along with something else…! But it will be connected with this chap, so don't think of this as a filler one…We needed some character development, me thinks.**

**I hope you liked it and thank you for reading! Comments, please? They make my day and ease the anxiousness that is caused by life issues…Guh…**

**Until next time!**

**Xxx Lina ;o)**


	18. Chapter 17

**A/N: Welcome! I am sorry for the delay, but I had been ridiculously unmotivated to write this…But I hope I have it back on track now!**

**I want to thank my reviewers: Makrciana, MissMisc3, TinkerbellxO, PGAEmma, Jandra1969, dionne dance, lottielovebuzz and XantheXV. You are the reason I am writing this! Thank you!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Chapter 17**

_**Love is a force more formidable than any other. It is invisible - it cannot be seen or measured, yet it is powerful enough to transform you in a moment, and offer you more joy than any material possession could.**_

_**~Barbara de Angelis**_

"Are the pills working?" Julia asks as soon as I enter her office and I pause at the abrupt tone in her voice. Her head is lowered and her eyes trained on a magazine on her lap.

I falter and wonder if I should tell the truth or not. Deep inside I don't want to…I don't know what it is, but something about the woman causes me to be on edge. I take a deep breath and make my decision.

"Um…They are." I lie easily and approach her. She doesn't need to know that I haven't taken any of the pills. I fear the results if I _do_ use them. What if I become addicted to them? What if I can't sleep without them afterwards? It's not a road I want to follow again. I've had enough addiction with my insomnia pills.

"You're sleeping then?" Julia looks up at me and I am a little confused at her weary expression. Have I done something that I am not aware of?  
"I am."

"I suppose you would…Victoria said you have been spending time with Barnabas." She puts the magazine away and stands up, her eyes slightly narrowed, "Are you finally coming to terms with your situation?" She speaks slowly as if to a child and for a reason unknown I tense up.

My nostrils flare a little at her words. Situation? I am a situation now? She doesn't even know what really is between Barnabas and me. She couldn't possibly understand how he feels, how I feel. She couldn't possible understand the nature of the invisible chains that are binding us together.

"I can hardly call it a situation, doctor. We are talking about my life here. However, I thank you for your concern. It seems to me that news spread easily around here." I reply with a little irk and she smirks a little.

"Darling, when you talk to Victoria you have to expect such things."

"Talk to Victoria? Me?" I frown and she looks at me with puzzlement, "When did I talk to her?"

What is she talking about? Victoria doesn't make small talk with me, let alone long conversations. Most of the times she is either busy with David or brooding or staring at Barnabas as if he is the Christ.

I pause at that and shake my head. Don't I do that most of the times? I mustn't judge and yet even I can feel that there is something off about her…

"Wait a moment." Julia shakes her head, snapping me out of my thoughts, "She said she saw you on her way to Barnabas' room."

"Yes, she saw me when she was leaving. I didn't talk to her. In fact, she barely looked at me as she walked away." I pause, "Have you been talking to her then?" I am curious and I can't help it.

"Yes."

"Why?" My voice is laced with incredulity and she licks her red lips before she replies.

"She's been seeing me in private…"

I shake my head to clear it, "As a doctor?"

"What else, dear?" Her voice s weary.

I laugh a little and Julia looks at me curiously, "I thought she was perfectly alright. Why would she talk to you? Me on the other hand…well…" I chuckle bitterly and Julia steps closer to me, her eyes glum.

"You see a person, a face, Jane. You do not see what's underneath. Never say never. However, I cannot say anything else. Doctor-patient confidentiality and all that." She adjusts her glasses on her nose and then pats the bed.

"Now hop on so we can proceed with the task at hand." She walks towards her tools and I take a seat on the medical bed, suspicious of the way she dismissed the subject. She was the one who mentioned it in the first place.

"He needs two bags a day…Sometimes three-…"

"I know." I cut her off and she turns to look at me and then she smiles.

"Of course you do…" She mutters and again I am concerned by her tone.

"Is something wrong, Julia?" I ask because I need to know. She makes me uncomfortable with the way she is looking at me…It is as if she is searching for something and as if she _knows_ something that I don't.

"Just a headache, dear. Nothing a pill cannot fix." She murmurs and I watch as she pulls a box of pills out of her pocket and pops one in her mouth. She even swallows it without water and I look away.

I roll up my sleeve as she walks to me and I come to the somewhat _relieving_ conclusion that others might be in a worse mental shape than me…

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

"Would you like to turn on the television?" Elizabeth asks me and I look up from my cup of coffee. Her face is pale and her eyes wide with worry and impatience and I immediately sympathize with her. I feel exactly the same way.

I would never believe that I'd be this worried about Barnabas…But I am. I am worried that he's gone back to that…place. I am worried that others will be there and I am worried that they will be stronger because he hasn't fed today and then-…

I stop myself and take a deep breath. I need to calm down. Nothing will happen. They will be fine. _Nothing_ will happen.

"Um, no, thank you." I reply and Elizabeth sighs, reaching out to take a sip from her own cup.

"I am sure nothing bad will happen." She tells me with a tiny smile, her voice mirroring my thoughts, "We're being ridiculous…I still maintain the belief that Angelique is dead…No one can survive a beheading…Not even her." She shudders and I swallow hard at the memory.

"I agree…That is why I said that it is someone else's doing…" I nod and she purses her lips.

"How are the dreams?" She asks me quietly, changing the subject, and I tense up, not knowing how I should really answer.

"You know about them…" I breathe and nod, "For the last couple of days…I don't remember seeing any dreams…I don't."

And it's the truth. I know I _have_ been dreaming, but I do not remember the dreams. It's unnerving…and odd.

"Well, mostly we do not remember our dreams, but I knew that yours were more like visions?" She tries to catch my eyes and I finally look up at her.

"Yes, that's true…"

"Then maybe you have been seeing actual dreams now? Hmm? I wouldn't worry about it since you can sleep." She smiles at me and reaches out towards the food on the table. She picks up the plate of cookies from the tray and offers it to me.

"David helped to make these. You won't refuse, will you?" She winks and I am still surprised at how warm she is…She always seemed distant and cold in the past.

Despite my lack of appetite, I reach out towards the cookies. I take one and slowly bring it to my mouth. I take a bite and I frown. The taste is a bit bitter and Elizabeth immediately laughs.

"The only problem was that we burned them in the oven a little. We scraped what we could, but…" She puts the plate away and I smile.

"David is a very kind child…Um, where are his parents?" I ask as I put the cookie aside and look at Elizabeth.

She stiffens and looks at her cup. "David's mother was lost at sea…years ago. It was no accident of course." She looks up at me with a fierce expression, "Angelique killed her."

I inhale sharply, "Killed her? What had she done wrong?"

Elizabeth suddenly stands up, "Nothing. No one has done anything wrong to harm her apart from Barnabas. She was hell-bent to kill every living Collins…and she almost succeeded." She looks at me, "There was no logic in her, Jane. She was just full of hatred because she couldn't have what she wanted. A witch not being able to keep the man she wants? It's the hardest thing to admit. No spells, nothing could work on him because don't think that she hadn't tried. She had tried her hardest. Barnabas told me all about it."

I take a deep breath because she must be right. She was a witch. She must have tried anything in her power to make him love her. So, when everything didn't work, she decided to curse him and turn him into what he is now.

"A spell wouldn't be love, Elizabeth." I say and she shakes her head.

"She didn't want him to _love_ her, Jane. She wanted him to be hers so she could control Collinsport. How do you think did she become so powerful afterwards? She used the Collins family's weakness to her advantage."

"What happened to David's father? Did he die as well?" I murmur and her face falls, turning as blank as an empty sheet.

"No, he didn't, but he may as well be called dead." She replies and it is obvious that the topic upsets her. I feel the need to apologize.

"I am sorry for bringing it up." I say quietly and Elizabeth shakes her head.

"No, it's fine…Do you want to take a walk in the garden?" She asks as she puts her cup away and looks at me expectantly.

I look away and take a deep breath. I must get out of the house. I must overcome this fear. I must stop thinking about the past.

Taking a look around the parlor, I stand up and nod. She smiles and we both head towards the door when Victoria appears.

"Oh. I didn't know anyone was still awake." She says as she gazes between Elizabeth and me.

I look at Elizabeth, but it is obvious that she has the answer ready.

"Yes, well, we couldn't sleep and we decided to drink some coffee…Is there anything you wanted, Ms. Winters?"

Victoria smoothes down her skirt and crosses her hands over her stomach in a way that reminds me of the girls in church choruses.

"I was…looking for something." Her gaze flickers to me and then to the table next to the sofa, "My book." She walks over and quickly picks up the thick volume, placing it under her arm as she returns towards us.

"Ah, well, goodnight then." Elizabeth nods and places her hand on my arm, ready to pull me towards the door, but then Victoria speaks.

"Have you seen Barnabas? He is usually at the library at this hour."

We both freeze, but I speak up.

"There was a problem in the fishing business. He went to take a look." I conjure up a lie and her eyes widen.

"Oh. I hope everything is alright."

"It is, Ms. Winters. Excuse us. I hope David is asleep by now?" Elizabeth is already pulling me towards the door as Victoria nods her head quickly.

"Of course."

"Wonderful, goodnight."

We disappear out of the door and I can breathe freely again.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

My neck is turned awkwardly to the side and I can feel it throbbing with pain even in my light slumber. I groan and try to find a more comfortable position, but nothing is working.

A flash of footsteps and a hand on my knee is enough to startle me and I open my eyes with a start. I gasp and a hand flies to my chest as I find myself awake and gazing right into the dark eyes of Barnabas.

"Jane?" he murmurs as he gently squeezes my knee, "Did I wake you?"

I sit up and look him over carefully. He seems alright.

"No, it's fine. Did you just get back?" I ask and he nods.

"Hmm."

"What happened?"

He sighs, "Nothing, Jane. The place was empty."

"Empty, but the witch's head was gone. Forgot to mention that." Carolyn calls from the stairs and I turn to look at her.

"Gone?" I whisper, "What do you mean gone?"

Barnabas leans down and places both hands on my lap, "The body was there, but the head was gone. Probably taken by one of her _pets_." He spits the last word out with distaste and my stomach clenches in fear.

"They used it to send the package." I mutter and he nods.

"Or they needed to perform witchcraft, either one." Carolyn adds almost bored and Barnabas turns to her.

"Carolyn, go to bed. It's late." He murmurs as he widens his eyes in warning.

"But it wasn't late for a long night trip to the cave? You're full of bull-…"

"Beg you pardon, young miss." He cuts her off, "But your mother is probably waiting for you."

Carolyn stares at him blankly for a few seconds before she shrugs and walks away, shuffling her feet like the young teenager that she is.

"That child!" Barnabas exclaims, "We should find her a husband immediately!"

His sentence causes me to laugh out loud and he looks up at me with a frown.

"What?"

When I don't stop, he actually looks embarrassed, "What is so amusing?"

I shake my head, "She is fifteen. A child, like you said, and you want to marry her off? Barnabas, we are not in the eighteenth century."

He looks startled at my response and then he smiles, "But someone else is of age for this…century's standards." He starts slowly and I blink at him.

"Barnabas-…"

"Jane." He cuts me off with a smirk and I laugh.

"You are teasing, right? I mean you don't…" I trail off at the intense look in his eyes.

"I am not. I suppose you haven't fully understood the nature of the bond." He starts and I gulp.

"I…I know what it means."

"Then you must understand the repercussions as well. Mated for life. That's what happens once it is complete." He regards me carefully, "Have you made a decision?"

"Barnabas, you're changing the subject. We were talking about the-…"

"Yes, we were. But as time slips away I come to the conclusion that the only way to fully protect you is by completing the bond." He stands and takes me with him,

He places me in front of him and starts circling me; slowly, like a predator.

"How?" I ask as he places his hands on my shoulders and pushes them down the length of my arms in a caress.

"If the bond is completed my scent will be on you. _Everywhere_." His nose brushes against my cheek and down my neck, "You will bear my marks. Therefore, no other vampire could touch you. The smell would be deadly to them. They wouldn't be able to stand it."

I shiver at the imaginary and shake my head, "So, I'd be almost like you."

"In a way…You'd be protected from any attack of my kind…"

"But are you certain that you want to be tied to me?" I turn around and his eyes widen as we are face to face.

"Jane, the question is if you would agree to be tied to me; to what I am." He breathes as he reaches up and cups my cheek, "I have been waiting for this for years. I have no second thoughts."

I inhale shakily and give a small nod, "I…I am not sure…It's something very important and I…" I sigh, "I was thinking that I should after all…study the books."

He looks wounded at first and then curious, "Books?"

"The books you gave me…"

His eyes widen and he steps closer, "The spell books?" He murmurs and I nod.

"Yes…I am thinking that I should probably use whatever…ability I have because I wouldn't call it talent." I shudder, "Not when it can hurt people."

"It depends on how you use it." He murmurs carefully and then takes hold of my chin, "I shall give you all the time you want…But now you must rest and I need to…" He clears his throat, but I already know that he must be thirsty.

"Alright…" I step back, "Victoria was looking for you." I say and he frowns deeply.

"Victoria?"

"Yes, hours ago. I wouldn't be surprised if she was still up waiting for you."

I turn to walk away, but his voice stops me in my tracks.

"Jane, may I come to you once I am done?" He asks and I close my eyes.

I bite my lip and turn to look at him from over my shoulder, my cheeks flushed. Without a word, I nod my head once and I catch glimpse of his smile before I walk away.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_I open my eyes in panic. There is water in my lungs and in my throat. The salty liquid is flooding my mouth, burning my tongue and forcing all air out of me. My hands are flailing around, trying to find anchor onto something, anything, but they can't. I can feel my legs getting numb, I can feel my clothes sticking to me like a second skin and I know I am dying._

_My muscles are starting to get sore and my heart is fighting to keep pumping blood in my veins, but I know that it will stop any minute now. I can feel my hair scratching and slapping my face, neck and shoulders as wave after wave is smothering me, pushing me deeper and deeper into the dark abyss and I wonder if this is a dream or reality._

_My head is empty, my mouth is slowly falling open and my eyes are rolling into the back of my head. I can feel my heart slowing down and just before it can actually stop an invisible force intervenes. Hooks dig into the back of my dress and I can feel myself getting pulled out of the water. My eyes flicker behind my closed eyelids and once my nose is out of the water I start gasping for breath. I spit out the sea water and I can feel my mouth and throat burning, stinging from its assault._

_I fight hard, but I manage to open my eyes as the force pulling me upwards suddenly pauses. I am left hanging in the air, my arms outstretched and my legs still in the water._

_I blink as I try to pull in enough air, but I can't seem to be doing it right because I am dizzy, so dizzy. My vision is burning and everything is a blur of blue and black._

"_No." The word is suddenly whispered, but I know the voice. _

_Barnabas._

_A flare of hope flutters in my stomach and I gasp for more breath, convinced that this is not the end._

_After several moments of fog, my eyes start to see again and I want to laugh with relief, but I can't._

"_No!" The word is screamed and I tense up, trying to swallow back the feeling of nausea that is spreading all over me, taking control of my body._

_My eyes lock on a pair of blue eyes and I freeze, my entire body going even number than before._

"_Yes. She will watch." Her voice is sweet as if she is speaking words of love and then her hand is rising, rising up towards the sky and I can see Barnabas cowering, trapping himself against the rocks, his clothes ripped and wet as if he has fought with the waves himself._

_There is silence, at least in my ears, and then there are screams. I cry out as sharp pain rushes through me and I search frantically for Barnabas because I've suddenly lost him. I can see him near the shoreline and what I see is a sight I won't ever forget. I cannot tell how he has managed to arrange his limbs in such an awkward angle. I cannot tell where his hands or legs are until he arches his back and lets out a moan of agony._

_I thrash in the water and I ignore the waves that attack my body every few moments. I cannot think, I cannot blink, and I cannot even breathe because I know what his screams and growls mean. I know what is happening._

_He is turning._

_I can see him, even from so far away. I can see the way he trembles, as if electric currents are running through him, I can see the way he tears at his own clothing and hair. I can see the way he arches his neck and I can see the fierce snarl on his lips. I let out a sob and he turns towards me, his eyes pleading and his teeth bared. _

"_I can't." I whisper as I try to move my hands, but it is in vain. She has me immobile. I cannot move and I cannot wield any power. I am as helpless as him._

_I close my eyes as she starts chuckling and when I open them again I can see her staring at me, a mocking smile on her lips._

"_You don't have the guts." She starts as she gazes down at me with defiance, "I've sold my soul for my powers. You and your little books cannot compare. Sure, you may do some tricks, but other than that…" She trails off with a smirk and her words cause my skin to crawl. Slowly, I shake my head and study her. She is standing at the top of the cliff, arms outstretched. In her right hand she is holding a necklace. I immediately recognize it. It's Barnabas'. I have seen him wearing it in my dreams…I just…I had never paid great attention to it though. _

_I realize that it's her weapon. She has used it to put the curse on him. She…_

_I look at Barnabas and he is still writhing on the ground, his hair matted and sticking to his face._

_I close my eyes, trying to gather my thoughts, trying to ignore the burning in my body. I don't know what I am trying to do, but I know that I must remove the necklace from her possession before she completes the curse. I don't care if it will change things. I don't care if it will change the future._

_I open my eyes again and I focus my stare on her hand. The chain is hanging from her hand and I narrow my eyes. If I could just tug it out of her grasp for a moment everything would change._

_I open my lips and grit my teeth, watching, staring, until I can no longer hear or see anything besides that necklace. I cannot move my arms, but I can flick my wrist._

_I take a deep breath and as her laughter echoes around us my eyes narrow further in hatred._

"_Libero." I whisper and with a flick of my battered wrist, her hand is knocked to the side as if by an invisible force. The necklace slips from her hand no matter how hard she tries to close her fingers around it._

_She gasps, enraged and turns to look at me, as if not believing that I have done it._

_Barnabas' screams stop and I allow myself to smile, but it doesn't last long._

_A whispered incantation is enough to send me back into the water and I cry out in shock as I am thrust back inside the ocean._

_Waves are forcing my body underneath and I fight against them, but it is of no use. A hand closes around my throat and my hands fly up to my neck in an attempt to free myself. I scratch and pull at my own skin because there is nothing there. But…But I am sure that I can feel fingers around my throat, squeezing the life out of me and I realize that the more I fight the more painful it becomes._

_I can feel my shoes slipping from my feet and I lower my hands when I feel blood running down my throat and between my breasts. My clothes are soaked with it and I can feel the thickness of my own blood tainting me._

"_You fool."_

_The words are whispered, but that doesn't make them less sinister and hurtful._

_As I drift into an endless sleep, I lament the fact that the last voice I heard is Angelique's._

_Hands grasp me and lift me and I suddenly find myself encircled by a pair of familiar arms and then-…_

"Jane? Jane, wake up!"

My eyes fly open and I try to gather my bearings. I realize immediately that I am nestled into Barnabas' arms. His hands are on my back and I can feel his lips on my hair, pressing kisses there.

"Jane?"

"I'm awake." I manage to gasp out. I reach up and finger my throat. It is soft and smooth. It was a dream…or rather, a memory.

"It was real." I whisper and I can feel him tensing up around me. His legs are on either side of my hips and he closes them tight around me, trapping me between his strong muscles as he touches the side of my face.

"Yes." His reply is hoarse and I can imagine how difficult it was for him to witness the same thing twice.

"I died there."

"Yes." He voice was pained and I look up at him. I am shocked when I see a tear running down his cheek form the corner of his eye.

With a gasp, I reach up to wipe it away and he leans into my touch.

"The turning happened there, right? I couldn't prevent it." I whisper and he shakes his head.

"It was already over. You just managed to anger her and she…"

"She finished me off…How…?"

He takes a deep breath and swallows thickly, "She managed to drag you to Widow's…You almost killed yourself…I followed you and then she went insane…I-…"

"It's alright." I press my fingers against his lips and he presses a kiss on my fingertips, his eyes closing in reverence.

"I love you so much, Jane…I can't lose you again. Whatever you want…Name it and it shall be yours. Just don't deny me the chance to keep you safe. The-…" He stops when I lean forward and cup the back of his neck. His breath hitches and his nostrils flare in surprise.

"I won't…I'll try not to at least…But first things first." I take a deep breath, "I need to learn to be what I am…what I was. I need to learn to be a witch."

He smirks at the decisiveness in my voice and I flush, but don't stop my train of thoughts.

"Also," I lick my lips and his eyes follow the motion. It's no surprise when he leans to kiss me and I let him. His arms tighten around me and I hold onto him until I have to pull back for air.

He leans his forehead against mine and I nod my head.

"We need to find that necklace." I say quietly and he pauses.

"Necklace…?" Then his eyes widen in understanding.

"Yes, the necklace she held that night. The one I thrust out of her hand in the memory."

He is already shaking his head in denial, "That's impossible, Jane. I didn't find it when everything was over. It was nowhere to be found."

I stare at him for a few moments and then gaze at his shirt. I slip my hand onto his chest and then look up at him curiously.

"What did you do to her body after you left?" I ask and he frowns with confusion.

"We didn't do anything. I have decided to go and burn it before…" He trails off and then I can see recognition in his dark eyes.

"Oh." He breathes in realization and I nod.

She'd never get rid of that stone…Not if she didn't want it to fall into the wrong hands. The necklace is probably still on her and we have to find it before someone else does.

**End of chapter 17**

**Author's note: Thank you for reading! I hope it made up for the long wait!**

**Comments and thoughts, please? I need them!**

***Translation: Libero= release***

**Until next time!**

**Xxx Lina ;o)**


	19. Chapter 18

**A/N: Welcome back! I could offer a lot of excuses for this delay, but I won't. You probably don't need to hear them…**

**So, I want to thank: Jandra1969, MusicIsLife2015, MissMisc3, ForeverACharmedOne, lottielovebuzz, PGAEmma, Makrciana, TinkerbellxO, XantheXV, dionne dance and whatcatydidnext.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Chapter 18**

_**Never trust anyone who wants what you've got. Friend or no, envy is an overwhelming emotion.**_

_**~Eubie Blake**_

I am staring at the large volumes in front of me in what probably seems like a look of absolute confusion.

So many titles, so many books and no guidance.

I lick my dry lips and slowly reach out for one of the books. As my fingertips brush the spine I pause. My fingertips are itching to touch the book, but I hesitate. I am clueless. What if the knowledge in these books is…sinister? The last thing I need is to be initiated into dark magic; magic I would probably never be able to wield.

_I've sold my soul for my powers…_

I shiver as I recall Angelique's words. That dream is still haunting me and it's making me even more determined.

Pursing my lips, I pull the book out, cradling it in my hands.

_Secreti by Alessio Piemontese. _

With a frown I open it, flipping softly through the pages until I can finally decipher the nature of the book.

Alchemy. The pages are filled with various recipes and formulas that make me pause. So this is how it all started. What we know as science and medicine started through books like this. Fascinated, I close the book and keep it in under my armpit for further reading later.

My eyes continue to scan the titles and when I turn my eyes on the second shelf from the top, I stop. I bite my lip.

_The Sworn Book of Honorius._

I don't know why, but the book title rings a bell…I don't know where I've seen it before, but I know it's not one of the books Barnabas had given me. I want to reach out and touch it, but I am reluctant to. The binding looks old and for a moment I wonder how on earth Barnabas managed to get all these books in his possession.

"Need help?" The soft feminine voice causes me to jump high in the air. I startle so hard that I almost drop the book under my arm. Whirling around, I come face to face with Victoria.

Dread fills my stomach at the sight of her. I thought she was with David, but apparently I've spent too long staring at the books that time passed without me realizing it.

I clear my throat and smile, "Um, actually I was just browsing." I am not good at lying, but it seems like I managed to make the words sound believable because she nods. A small guarded smile curls her lips upwards and I blink, but return it nonetheless.

"I see…Mind if I look with you?" She gestures to the books behind me and my heart drops to my stomach.

"Um…"

_Lie. Lie._

"Sure." The hopeful look in her eyes is overwhelming and I curse my tame nature.

Almost floating, she comes to stand next to me and I turn around to face the shelves again.

"Oh…You're interested in alchemy?" She eyes some of the other books and I swallow.

"Yes…Well, kind of…I just needed something to pass the time." I blurt and she turns to look at me with an adorably confused expression that I loathe. It reminds me of things…and dreams.

"Not a big fan of romance then?" She gestures to the great dramas that are lined up two shelves down and I lick my lips before I shrug.

"You get tired of them at some point." I reply as I turn my eyes back on the shelf.

My eyes are still drawn to that particular book and I want to just reach out, grab it and then make a run for my room.

"Um, Jane?" Victoria's voice is quiet and I am suspicious of the sound of it at once. She wants something.

"Yes?" I don't turn to look at her. My eyes are still on the book.

"What is between you and Barnabas?" The question sets me off for some reason because I want to scream the same question back at her face.

Slowly, I turn to face her, trying to keep a neutral expression on my face.

"I am sorry?" I frown a little and she ducks her head, nervously running her fingertips over the book that I want. My eyes flicker between her and the book with agitation.

"Um…I am sorry if I am being a bit forward, but ever since you came here with him…he's been different…Um…How do you know him?" She asks and I have to wonder if she's as gullible as she seems.

I opt for the truth, "I've been working at the company for some time."

She frowns, her brow knitting in confusion, "Really? And now you don't?"

I open my mouth to respond, but she cuts me off.

"Forgive me, but…I was under the impression that your relationship is not just platonic." She is staring at me as if seeing right through me and I had never imagined that I'd have to explain myself to her. Aside from looking exactly like the woman Barnabas left behind in order to be with me, I don't know anything about her. I feel a little ruffled that I need to defend my presence in this house to her. And I feel angry with Barnabas for not making everything clear for her…and for me.

"It's not." I say after a long silence and her big baby blue eyes go as wide as saucers. Her cheeks flush and she blinks rapidly, "Oh."

"Why do you ask?" I take a step back as she lowers her hand from the shelf and fiddles with the end of her lavender shirt.

"I am surprised that you're still here is all…But now it makes sense I suppose-…"

"No surprise, Vicky." Elizabeth enters the library with a book in her hands and a small smile on her face, "I thought Barnabas had explained everything."

I almost breathe a sigh of relief at seeing her here. Her long black dress is swooshing as she moves and her blue eyes are slightly narrowed as they flicker between Victoria and me. She comes to stand right in front of us and she briefly eyes the shelf and the book in my hands before she turns to Victoria.

"Jane is our financial advisor. And for that to work she must be here with me. After the almost fire at the company I am keeping all the business books here." Elizabeth's eyes fall on me and she smiles, "I need your help with something later…If you have the time of course."

I quickly nod, "Of course."

"Excellent. Vicky, I believe David is waiting for you to go to the beach." She looks at Victoria again who is fidgeting nervously by now. She is obviously confused and probably surprised by my admittance.

"Oh…yes. Yes, of course. I must go. Excuse me." She flees the library in a blur of light skirts and when we are left alone I breathe a sigh of relief.

Elizabeth walks towards me and holds up an old fashioned key, "You might need this."

I reach out and take the key, looking at it with confusion, "What's this for?"

"It will provide privacy while in here." She gazes at the books behind me with a knowing look and I clear my throat.

"I didn't know there was a key."

"There isn't…Not on the door's lock at least. Barnabas had it and he gave it to me before he left." She presses the cold key onto my palm and I close my fingers tightly around it.

"Oh." I nod because it's not a surprise that Barnabas thinks of everything; everything besides clearing out his relationship with Victoria.

"Next time you're in here and don't want to be seen just lock the door." She pats my hand before she walks toward a shelf to put her book back to its proper place.

I follow her with my eyes before I finally reach out for the book. Once I have it in my hand I realize that it's very heavy. When my fingers press hard on the hard cover a tingling goes up and down my spine. I hold my breath and wait for something to happen, but the book doesn't move. The tingling doesn't stop though and I know, I just _know_, that it will take me quite some time to gather the courage to open it.

Without looking at any other books, I walk away with a quick excuse. My feet carry me swiftly to my chamber. I slip inside and close the door.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_A book is in my hands…and it looks old. I blink rapidly and when I look up I can see that I am sitting on a rocky beach. I frown a little and when I notice the stockings that go up my legs and reach my knees, I realize that I am dreaming again. I try not to tense up because after all, this is not the first time I take a glimpse into the past. I shake my head and groan as I stretch my legs._

_I sigh gently when I notice that I am alone and then take a look at the book. It's in English and I nod a little. A good thing I don't have any more skills here in the past. I'd be shocked if I could actually understand Latin._

_I almost choke on my own saliva when I notice that I am on a page filled with half English and half Latin. There are words, phrases, even little sentences that are translated into Latin. _

_Contego…_

_Ulcero…_

_Incido…_

_Velamen detraho…_

_Permisceo…_

_Caldor…_

_Bullio…_

_Creare tutum circuli…_

_Imprison…_

_Extermino…__**Burn…**_

_I slam the book shut and push it away from me. It lands on the beach and my eyes immediately fall on the cover._

_Grimoire of Honorius…_

_My eyes widen. It's the same book I found in Barnabas' library. For a moment I cannot move. Now I understand how the title seemed familiar to me. I've seen it before…I've studied it before…Here, in the past. _

_My throat goes dry when I realize that the book is not just a book with information. It's a book meant to teach you to control entities, even humans…It's a text that shows you exactly what you need to do and say. It has incantations and I am sure that most of them are not for white witches. _

_A shudder runs through me as I stare at the book. It almost feels like it's staring right back at me…It's unnerving._

_A breeze blows and messes up my loose hair and I don't bother pushing the black strands away. Apparently, I don't have to because after a few moments I feel a presence behind me. Warm hands fall on my shoulders as someone sits down behind me. A pair of strong legs comes to encircle my hips and I suddenly find myself in an embrace. I relax because by now I am familiar with it. I am even brave enough to lean back into the warmth, but my eyes do not stray from the book._

_Hands gather my hair and push it away from my face and neck, tucking it over my left shoulder. Warm breath fans over my ear and I shiver._

"_Jane?" My name is murmured gently and I blink, "Are you alright?"_

_I swallow hard and give a sudden shake of my head. I am not alright. I am confused._

"_Are you cold?" Barnabas' lips brush my ear as he speaks and I close my eyes. If only I could escape from all of this…All except from him._

"_Not really." My voice is little whisper and I can feel his frown even without seeing him._

"_What's wrong?" Hands rub up and down my arms and I bite my lip._

"_It's the book…I…"_

_He stiffens behind me, but he doesn't stop his caresses. He rests his chin on my shoulder and wraps his arms around me._

"_Was I wrong to give it to you?" His words cause me to jolt a little. He gave it to me? _

_My question is foolish really. Of course he provided the book. He's wealthy…He can afford rare books while I can't…_

"_I don't know." My response is delayed and I know that I am probably making no sense. I am as unresponsive as a chunk of wood in his arms. He doesn't take long to notice._

"_Jane." His voice is warm as he grasps my chin and turns my head so that we are face to face. I almost gasp at the sight of him. The moon is illuminating his features and when he licks his lips they glisten like a stream. I blink because my thoughts are wandering and try not to look at his mouth too much._

"_In order to provide protection again evil…or against adversaries…you sometimes need to know their weapons. If they attack with dark magic you must know equal methods to fight them off."_

_I can only stare at him, "Evil? Adversaries?" I echo and he nods, "Do you know something that I don't?" I ask and he frowns. I try not to find the furrow of his brow attractive. My infatuation is becoming worse as the days pass by…_

_Dear God, I am doomed. My body is already responding to his close proximity now that I can see him and really feel him._

"_Of course not." He shakes his head, "But…just like there are good and bad people, there is good and bad magic…You must know both in order to be complete…You must know both in order not to make mistakes." He releases my chin and brushes smooth fingertips down my throat instead._

_I almost gulp and bite my lip. The fingertips don't stop at my neckline. Instead, they slide underneath the plain fabric of my dress to touch the skin there. I gasp and my fingers reach up to grip his wrist in an iron grip._

_His eyes that had been following his wandering fingers snap up to mine and he grins at me widely, playfully; seductively._

"_Are you good or bad, Barnabas?" I murmur and his grin doesn't falter._

"_I can be whatever pleases you, my love." His reply is as smooth as the fingers on the top of my breast and I part my lips to take more air, but I can't. _

"_That's not an answer." I manage to choke out as his free arm curls around my waist, his forearm folding over my belly, fingers pressing against the skin underneath._

"_It's the one you want to hear the most." His reply is husky and for the moment the book is forgotten._

"_It's late…"_

"_You asked me to meet you here." He frowns a little at my abrupt words and I try not to lean further into him._

"_I did?"_

"_Hmm."_

_My eyes roam his form and I can see that he is wearing formal clothes; dark crimson is always his choice of attire while attending a fancy gathering at Collinwood. He probably just escaped from one of his family's famous parties._

"_Won't you be missed?" I ask as I turn in his embrace and slowly fold my arms around his neck._

_His eyes are smoldering as he looks down at me, his expression serene, warm and bright._

"_Not by anyone of importance. My parents know I sometimes dread the gatherings…" he murmurs and I take a deep breath._

"_And Josette?" I ask and he pauses before he replies in a barely audible voice._

"_She was not there…She didn't come after we…" He trails off and I am curious to know more._

"_After you what?" I urge him on and he closes his eyes briefly before he replies, his lips barely moving._

"_We had a fight and…" _

"_I want to swim." I cut him off because I know what they had fought about. He's been neglecting her. Lying to her. Spending his time with me instead of staying with her._

_He seems surprised by my words, but then he chuckles, "But it's not warm yet." He rubs my back, but I am already moving out of the circle of his arms._

_He tries to grab a hold of me again, but I am already standing up and away from his reach._

"_Ah, but I am a witch." I press my finger against my lips in a secretive gesture and his grin is wide as he watches me from his place on the beach._

_I walk backwards and pray to God that I am able to do this right. I turn around and wave my hand in a circular motion._

"_Caldor." I whisper and my fingers tingle as I flourish my hand. I hesitate and then slip one foot inside the water. It's warm; as if the sun is high on the sky instead of the moon._

_I smile and turn around to face Barnabas again. He's still sitting on the shore, staring at me peculiarly._

_I narrow my eyes and open my arms wide, "What?" I chuckle at his almost lost expression and he blinks rapidly, as if waking up from a dream._

"_Won't you come?" I ask quietly because his staring in unnerving. It's deep, bottomless and for a moment I worry that I have scared him or something. _

_My thoughts are disproved when he stands up, slowly and like a cat. His hands reach for his coat and he shrugs it off, letting it drop to the ground as he reaches for the vest underneath. His fingers are quick, agile and he has his vest off in a matter of seconds. His fingers touch his cuffs and he undoes the buttons before he starts unbuttoning his shirt, pulling it out of his breeches. _

_My eyes widen a little. "What are you doing?"_

_His mouth is curved into a sly smirk as he removes his shirt. "Well, I can't just get into the water with my fancy clothes on now, can I? How would I explain that? And I am not sure you've learned a spell for drying clothes just yet." His fingers are on the fastenings of his breeches next and I yelp before I quickly turn around. I place a hand on top of my left breast and I can feel my heart beating erratically._

"_Just don't…step on my book." I call shakily as the waves that are reaching the shore make me sway a little._

_Hands settle on my hips and I open my eyes as a pair of lips latches onto the skin of my neck._

"My_ book." He breathes and I exhale shakily as his tongue laves at my skin, spreading warmth up to my cheeks, "You still haven't paid me back." His fingers hook on the front laces of my dress and he starts undoing them with dexterity until the folds of the dress fall apart in his awaiting hands. He tugs it from my shoulders and throws it somewhere behind us before he reaches for the laces of my corset._

_Corset? I am wearing a damn corset! Why have I never noticed that before?_

_I don't have time to answer the question because he has already loosened the thick material and he's in the process of pulling it off of me. Once it's gone, his hands come to settle on my bare hips._

"_What do you want?" I ask with a racing heartbeat and he turns me around so that I am facing him. He curls an arm around me, burying his free hand in my dark hair and twisting his fingers around several strands._

"_Don't worry." He murmurs as he starts walking us backwards and deeper into the water, "I'll get what I want." _

_I gasp when the water reaches my lower back, but he's already guiding me away and towards a parapet of rocks. The rugged, heavy lumps are situated among the endless water and as we swim towards them I am surprised that my spell is actually still working._

_Lips on my jaw cause me to shiver and my hands find anchor on Barnabas' shoulders. I gasp when my back is pressed against one of the moist, jagged rocks and my eyes lock with his. He is smiling softly as he rests a hand on the rock next to my head._

"_Wouldn't want to be seen by fishermen now, would we?" he murmurs and then his lips are on mine._

_Every thought of propriety flies out of my head as his hands take a firm hold of my hips. With a swift move, he lifts me up and my legs find purchase around his slim waist. I lock them at the ankles so I won't slide down and I break the kiss to gaze down at him. _

_The tide is forcing him closer to me, pushing his hips towards me and I flush a deep crimson. He chuckles as he leans in and then his mouth is on my neck below my ear. Shivers are running through me and my hand is quick to dive in his short hair. He groans against my skin and his teeth bite down on the tender skin. I cry out and he smirks against me, biting me again and then soothing the skin with his tongue. I try not to compare these bites with the ones of his more…modern and much _immortal_ self, but the comparison is compulsory when he proceeds to kiss and nip at the skin of my shoulder. Squeezing my eyes shut when he pushes his pelvis hard against mine, I dig my nails into the skin of his smooth back._

_His reaction is unexpected. He moans and bucks against me, pressing me harder against the rocky surface behind me. A frantic hand slips between our bodies and wet fingers curve over the gentle swell of my breast. His palm and fingers are hot and I open my eyes as they start moving over the flesh they are holding captive. My throat is suddenly parched and my breath leaves me in tiny gasps and he pulls back to look at me. His mouth is parted and his eyes heavy. His knees are nearly touching the rock underneath my backside and I realize that he's pressed tightly against the apex of my thighs. _

_He's not moving. He's as still as a statue as his hand kneads the gentle flesh of my breast and when his fingers abandon my chest to trail down my stomach my breath quivers._

"_Jane…" He breathes in a voice that is full of things I don't dare name. His fingers brush my lower belly and before they have the chance to trail further down I grip his wrist. _

_Dark eyes snap up to mine and I can see confusion swimming among the desire. Without speaking, I lift his hand to my mouth and press a kiss to his palm. His sharp inhalation causes us both to jolt in the water and I almost cry out when I am able feel the evidence of his arousal against me._

_Pulling my lips away from his moist, salty palm I guide his hand on my collarbones, letting it rest there as I pull my hand away. My fingers curl over his shoulder and I pull myself closer until our chests are brushing. His eyes widen minutely and when my lips touch his jaw he groans and pushes closer to me. _

"_Thank you." I breathe against his smooth skin and another groan vibrates deep in his throat as he grinds against me. I move my lips lower until I reach his throat and his hoarse, breathy moan disturbs the hair near my ear._

_Fingers tighten on my breast again and a hand clamps tightly on my bare thigh while short, groomed fingernails dig into the soft skin and draw a gasp from me._

"_I want you." His words are strained, low and my belly clenches in delight at the affection that is oozing from them. I curl my arms around him and close my lips over the skin under his ear, shivering as his palm presses against my lower back. He moves it up and down in languid caresses, pulling us even closer in the process. _

_I am barely conscious of his hand that is moving between us and when I finally realize that he's been getting into position to claim me, a large wave crashes against his back. He groans and loses his balance and he holds onto me to stay upright. _

"_Bugger." His curse is choked against my shoulder and I can't help it._

_Before I can stop it, I am laughing loudly against his neck, shoulders shaking and thighs quivering around him._

"_Minx." He mutters indignantly, but I can already feel his belly vibrating with laughter. Another wave causes us both to sway and before we know it we are both underneath the water, still laughing._

_His hands close around my wrists and he manages to pull me closer, but an invisible force is pulling me away from him no matter what._

_I am waking up._

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

My reflection is staring back at me. My cheeks are still flushed and my body is still tingling from my dream. I do not feel disappointed that I woke up…No, I don't.

No, I don't.

_No. I. Do. Not._

"Get a grip." I hiss harshly before I turn away from the mirror. The two books on my mattress are mocking me and I head towards the large bed. I take a seat and eye them with hesitation and dread. My dream is proof enough… I must look into them. I need to read them.

Stifling a sigh and ignoring the little voice in my head that tells me that I mustn't, I reach for the Grimoire.

My fingers are barely touching the cover when I hear a scream.

I jump in fear and stand up from my bed. I know the voice.

"Elizabeth." I murmur and before I know it I am out of the door. The hall is covered in darkness and as I walk it is no wonder that I collide with someone.

"Ow! Easy!" Julia's voice is slurred and I steady myself by touching the wall.

"Julia?"

"Yeah, me. What was that sound?" She asks and as my eyes adjust in the darkness I can see her standing in front of me, a glass in her hand.

"I don't know…I am not sure." I blink and then continue down the hall until I arrive at the stairs. Another person is standing there and when I realize that it's Victoria I hesitate.

"It was a scream." She whispers without turning to look at me and I am unnerved by her frozen posture.

I brush past her and climb down the stairs quickly, not caring about my still aching foot and I am faintly aware that Julia is trailing behind me.

Another scream reverberates in the manor and by the time I arrive at the last step I am shaking with alarm.

I see Elizabeth first. She kneeling in front of a slumped form, her hand on top of a clothed chest and bloodied.

I immediately recognize the expensive black shoes.

"Barnabas." The name leaves my lips in breathless agony and Elizabeth turns towards me.

"Jane! Help me." Her eyes are wide with fear and her features laced in agony.

I approach and then I notice the vice grip around her right hand. Barnabas is holding her hand in a tight grip and he has his mouth pressed against her skin. There is a gush…No. There are several gushes on his stomach as if…

_Wait. His mouth on her wrist? He's drinking her blood?!_

"Jane!" Elizabeth's voice is high pitched and I finally move.

"Oh fuck!" Julia's exclamation is lost to me as I approach the two figures.

"Barnabas." I am frantic as I lean next to Elizabeth and his eyes snap open. They are a fierce mixture of black and red and his pupils are dilated. At the sight of me, he releases Elizabeth who scrambles to get away from him. She lands on her backside several feet away with her hand cradled against her chest, her eyes wide in fear.

"Barnabas." I try to touch him, but he rolls away from me, promptly emptying the contents of his stomach on the carpeted floor of the entrance hall. Blood splutters everywhere; Elizabeth's blood, and I can feel bile rising in my mouth as I look at it.

Barnabas is shaking madly, his hands biting into the tainted carpet and almost digging holes on the marble floor.

My palms are sweating as I stare at him and I can hear Victoria's gasp as she arrives.

Ignoring everyone, I reach out and touch him. His back arches at the first brush of my fingertips against his clothed back and before I know it, he is turning around to face me. His eyes are wide and his hand is pressed against his stomach. I can see blood oozing from the gushes and I shrug out of my robe, pressing it against the wounds. His fingers seize my wrist, painfully holding my hand captive and I dare to look into his eyes; his crazed eyes.

"Jane?" His voice is a rough choked groan and I nod.

"Jane…" he repeats, "Jane…were…were…" A gurgled growl cuts off his speech and he shakes his head as his nostrils flare in an attempt to inhale more of my scent.

"Tell me what to do." My voice is quivering because he looks so very pale. I can see the veins underneath his translucent skin.

"W-werewolf." He spits out and then his eyes roam my face until they come to rest on my neck.

"Werewolf?" I repeat, "Did he do this-…"

I don't have time to finish because in a flash he has moved from his place. His hands clutch at my hips as he pounces and I find myself on my back with him on top. Cruel fingers curl around my hair and then he is pulling my head back and back until my neck is bared to him.

My heart feels ready to burst, but I don't move. I know what he wants and I know that right now he'll do anything to get it. Any protest will seem as rejection and I try to stay still. My confidence doesn't last long because as soon as his teeth are bared chaos ensues. The people around us start screaming at him to stop and he growls, tightening his hold on me until bruises form on my hip and spasms of pain run up and down the tendons in my neck.

"Jesus!" I recognize the voice as Victoria's, but I have no time to look at her.

Sharp teeth break the skin of my neck and I cry out. His back bows at my painful exclamation and his fangs retreat only to be replaced by lips and tongue as he sucks.

"No, stop!" Elizabeth's voice is shrill and it takes me a moment to realize that she's not speaking to Barnabas. She's holding Julia back with an imperious hand, preventing her from getting closer to us.

Our eyes lock and I watch as comprehension dances across her face. She knows that he must get blood; my blood in order to survive, but I am not as lucid.

The pain on my neck intensifies with every gluttonous suck of his needy lips and I curl my fingers into fists in order not to fight him and push him away. Every cell in my body is telling me to get away, but I bite my tongue hard and try to remain still until my vision starts to blur.

I gasp for air and I can feel my nails biting into the skin of my palms, but he's not moving away just yet. His tongue is scorching every time he sweeps it over the leaked drops of my blood and I don't know if the tingling in my belly is from fear or want. How can I want him when I am barely able to breathe with him holding me down? I know now that with him, my powers are useless because I cannot even move. And even though I want to help him, I can't help but be angry that he is not conscious of the fact that he's hurting me.

"Barnabas…" My voice is barely audible so it's no surprise when he pays it no heed. My legs start twisting under his and my heavy lidded eyes lock with Elizabeth's.

She is gaping at us until she shakes her head and steps forward.

"Barnabas." Her voice is firm, but gentle in an effort not to alarm him. It'd take one hasty move for him to snap me in two at the state he's in.

A hoarse moan is her only answer and I am aware of the fact that my blood is running down my throat, staining my shirt and mixing in with his blood that has already soaked my stomach. I blink and arch my back in a last attempt to wake him up from his daze, but it's of no use.

"Barnabas, let her go!" Elizabeth's voice is louder this time, much louder than before and the vampire above me is startled.

I don't dare move, but when he growls in possessiveness I start wiggling underneath him. His mouth is still on my neck and I can feel his tongue darting out of his mouth to lave at my skin as he whimpers in pain.

_I know you're hurt, but please, don't kill me. Please._

"Barnabas, you're hurting her!" Elizabeth's words are nothing but a bark of authority and Barnabas suddenly freezes on top of me.

My eyes flutter closed when he releases me as if burned and I fall on the ground like a ragdoll.

Black spots are swimming behind my closed eyelids and when a hesitant, cold hand brushes over my face in remorse I shudder, my body shaking with exhaustion.

"J-Jane?" His voice is like a little child's and when I open my eyes I see Julia rushing to me and pushing him out of the way like he's the plague.

I blink rapidly and gently shake my head, but my vision is still unfocused. My hand abandons the ground in an effort to touch him and comfort him, but Elizabeth is already pulling him away from me.

I want to speak, but I can't. Almost without my will I fall into blissful, black oblivion.

**End of chapter 18**

**Author's note: Thank you for reading. I hope this made up for the wait…**

**So, liked it? Hated it? Let me know please. I need your opinions and thoughts. You did get why Barnabas **_**attacked**_** Jane, right? Right…? I hope so…Just remember the bond and that he's been hurt.**

***Info: **_**The Sworn Book of Honorius/Grimoire of Honorius**_** is real and it's one of the first books about witchcraft. It includes knowledge and information that has to do with magic and it was one of the books used in necromancy. It made its appearance in the 14****th**** century.**

_**Secreti**_** is also another book and its purpose was to give detailed recipes and formulas that could be used in order to heal people.***

**Translations: **

_**Velamen Detrho= unveil**_

_**Incido= slash **_

_**Ulcero= wound**_

_**Contego= protect**_

_**Permisceo=confound**_

_**Bullio= flare up**_

_**Creare tutum circuli= create safe circle**_

_**Extermino= burn**_

_**Incarcero= imprison**_

_**Caldor= heat, warmth**_

**Until next time, loves!**

**Xxx Lina :o)**


	20. Chapter 19

**A/N: Hello and welcome back! How is your summer going, lovelies? Well, I hope.**

**I want to thank: RandomCitizen, Destiny Xavier16, Dragonmaster789, whatcatydidnext, MissMisc3, Makrciana, XantheXV, TinkerbellxO, lottielovebuzz, dionne dance, AgnesBriot1969 and MusicIsLife2015. You are all wonderful!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Chapter 19**

_**I could bend you with my finger and thumb; a mere reed you feel in my hands.**_

_**But what ever I do with this cage I cannot get at you. And it is your soul that I want! Why don't you come of your own free will?**_

_**~Jane Eyre**_

_I find myself walking hurriedly in a deserted path. My long skirts are swooshing noisily as I walk and I look down at my attire. The dress is not intricate, but it is a deep burgundy color. The shoes are comfortable and soft and there is a smock clutched in my right hand. I frown a little, but I do not stop walking. The trees are standing tall on either side of the rocky path and the moon is high on the sky, illuminating my way._

_I can hear the fainting sound of music. Violin and piano are prominent in the cool night air and the melody is upbeat and merry. The path I am taking is not familiar to me, but somehow my footsteps are confident if not a little hasty. Am I running from something? The wild beating of my heart tells me that I am and I don't dare wonder what I am running from in the first place!_

_My question is answered once I hear the sound of hooves. I pause and my spine goes as straight as a stretched bow. My feet pick up the pace automatically, but the horse is getting closer, approaching me from behind and I falter a little. When the animal neighs loudly, I gasp and step to the side, out of the path where the grass is soft and pliable under my soles._

_I gasp as the horse hurries past me, but I am mistaken if I think that the frantic animal has nothing to do with me._

_There is a blur of movement and I squint in the darkness. Dark eyes collided with my own and I tense up._

_Barnabas is wide eyed as he looks at me with his hands tightly wrapped around the reins of his horse and his hair windswept. Something in his gaze tells me to keep walking and so I do. I walk past him and his huffing horse and I can feel his eyes on my back as I distance myself from him._

"_Jane?" His voice is odd; slightly angry, confused and a little bit amused._

"_Jane!" He calls out again, this time a little more urgently._

_I can hear the horse moving again until he is trotting next to me._

_I look at him sideways and notice his hand. I almost stumble at the sight of the gold band around his finger. That hadn't been there in any of the other dreams._

"_Jane?" his tone is soft now and I frown a little._

_I blink and look away from his fingers, focusing on the road again. I don't speak because unlike other times I have no idea of what to say. I am not sure why I am leaving in the first place._

"_Jane." His tone is a warning and I stop, swiftly turning towards him._

"_Mister Collins." I murmur and he frowns before he quickly composes himself and shakes his head._

"_Why are you in such a hurry?" His mouth is twitching a little bit as he gazes down at me._

"_Um…" I search for something to say and then I notice the apron in my hand. Was I among the help again? Was I in Collinwood?  
"I don't want my payment." I blurt out and he bites his lip in what I recognize as effort not to burst into fits of laughter._

"_Reasonable." He pats the horse's mane and then climbs down, "After what you just did." _

_My eyes go wide, "I beg your pardon?" My voice is a hiss._

_He abandons the reins and approaches me, slowly, "The glasses you just broke…in my house… My very expensive glasses." He informs me and I gape at him._

"_I…I…" I scan my brain for something clever, but nothing comes out of my mouth but a gurgle._

"_Without touching them." He continues and I blink rapidly._

_Without touching them?_

"_I am not sure I understand…" I start quietly._

"_I wonder what made you have such a reaction…my little witch." His voice drops to a mere whisper as he slides closer to me._

_My eyes go wide and slightly glazed over at the information he just threw at me and I open and close my mouth like a damn fish as I look up at him. This is the moment I wish I was a little taller._

"_How…did you come to such a conclusion, Mr. Collins?"_

"_Back to that, are we?" He frowns with a slightly irritable expression on his face, "Mr. Collins and not Barnabas…Are you mad about something? Hmm?"_

_I take a step back and the single movement takes me further off the path and deeper into the tall trees. The smell of wet grass is more prominent here. The smell is alluring in a peculiar way._

"_Mad?" I echo back at him and he slowly nods his head._

"_Angry…Agitated…Ruffled." He enunciates each word with clarity, making them seem seductive instead of accusing. How can he do that?_

"_I am not agitated…or angry…"_

"_How about ruffled?" He cocks an eyebrow and I narrow my eyes in anger._

_Is he playing with me?_

"_Why should I be?"_

"_You tell me."_

"_No, I won't."_

_His eyes narrow, "You seem somewhat jealous, my little witch."_

_The words set me off, "Jealous?"_

"_And this is the second time that I call you by your profession. You still haven't reacted about it." he whispers._

"_Profession?"_

_My eyes go a little wide when I realize that he knows that I am…a witch. Is he supposed to know that? In what time am I? From the band around his finger I can tell that he is still betrothed with Josette. Did he know about me so early?_

"_It is not a profession." I blurt out and he is already in the process of removing his gloves as he approaches me, slowly backing me further and further into the woods._

"_Is it not?"_

"_I'd call it an unwanted …characteristic." I say and he pauses._

"_Unwanted?" He mutters and I can see that he seems perplexed._

"_Well, Mr. Collins, I don't fancy the idea of being burned at the stake." I say in a little whisper and he inhales sharply._

"_I don't fancy that idea either." His eyes are boring into my own._

_My eyes flicker around us, searching the darkness, but he suddenly is closer to me, much closer, and he is throwing his gloves on the grass before he reaches out to grasp my chin._

"_Don't be afraid of me." His words startle me, "I am not going to tell anyone." His eyes are soft, "I'd rather die."_

_I swallow hard, "Then what is it that you want?" I whisper._

"_You know what I want."_

"_Actually, I don't."_

"_You know…You know since that day you refused me. At the manor."_

_My brain lightens up with clarity. The old dream…I remember that one. He'd been remorseful and contrite about kissing me…Or about…_

"_Forcing kisses on people is not polite, sir. Even if the target is a witch."_

_His fingers on my chin back away and he grasps my elbow instead._

"_On the other hand, I now know why I so desire the kisses in the first place." He steps closer, into my personal space, "A spell." His mouth is twitching with his amusement, but I am a little too perturbed by his response to my abilities to be swayed by the charming features he is so slyly using against me. Why is he not running to inform everyone about me? Why is he not…alarmed? He hates Angelique and all that she represents._

"_I know no spells." _

"_Then what was that smashing about?"_

"_A reflexive reaction, I suppose."_

_His eyes light up, "To what?"_

_I blink, trying to come up with something, "I…am not sure."_

_His eyes soften, "Jane…" His hands come up to cup my face and my body jolts in response to his tender touch._

"_I don't love her." He murmurs and I gulp._

_Gently, I pull away, "That is not my concern."_

"_Jane." He closes his eyes in resignation, "I am not blind." When he reopens them they are swimming with emotions._

"_What do you want me to say?" My voice is quivering as I speak the words._

"_I don't want you to say anything. I've seen it all." He leans closer, "All I want is for you to yield." His lips are on me before I can take another breath and suddenly I am falling. His hands shot out, strong and lithe and clasp me to him tightly. His palms come to land low on my waist and his touch is burning me even through my thick clothing._

_His lips are unfocused at first, as if he's not fully aware who he's kissing, but when my hands come to rest on his shoulders he groans and lurches forward. His mouth catches my lower lip and he laves it in warmth while his hands press harder on my waist until he is practically glued against me. His tongue slides wetly along my lip and then he uses it to deepen the kiss. I stumble from the force of his mouth and tongue and we are suddenly falling. I gasp against his hungry lips and he groans when my back collides with the wet grass. His palms cover my back to ease my fall, but I can feel his pained groan when my weight falls onto them with a vengeance. I try to pull away in order to apologize, but his mouth follows mine as I try to back away. I have nowhere to go really and I give up. His teeth are nipping at my lip and his left hand slides down to grasp my hip. He squeezes it firmly and then his mouth is torn from my lips. Mouth and tongue trail down to my neck and his right hand manages to slip in between the front laces of my dress. He pulls at them with insistence and when they give way under his tugging his fingers slide underneath, brushing over my stomach._

_I am gasping for breath, my eyes half lidded and gazing at the dark sky. My hands are still clutching his shoulders and I try not to lose my mind at the way his soft mouth is moving over my skin. I try to ignore the heat that is making me feel feverish and I try to push the fog of pleasure away long enough to understand his intentions. _

_He is brazen and forward in my dreams…He…he is different in my present. I am not sure which one I prefer. A little voice in my head reminds me that he has learned to be reserved since he could easily snap me in two if he was to be too careless. Here he is human… In my present he is a vampire._

"_Jane…" He is already tugging at his waistcoat with his mouth still pressed against my throat._

"_I am sorry about the glasses." I whisper into his ear and he pauses. His fingers flex on my stomach and then his eyes are on my own._

_His lips curl up into a grin and a chuckle escapes his throat, husky and deep and my fingers slide down from his shoulders to his arms in an unconscious caress._

_He opens his mouth to speak, but then the rustling of leaves cuts him off. He pushes up on his palms, pulling his body off of me as his eyes focus on the darkness beyond us._

"_What is it-…" His palm comes and clamps down on my mouth and my eyes widen a little._

"_Shh." His voice is a hiss and I gulp. _

_Slowly, he pulls his hand away and swiftly gets to his feet. His hands reach for me and pull me up._

"_There's someone behind these trees." I whisper and he nods._

"_Indeed."_

"_We should go." I murmur, but he holds me fast. He looks up at the full moon and then starts walking forward._

_His fingers are tightly wrapped around my hand and I try to stop him, but he is relentless._

_He guides me closer to the rustling and as we approach we can hear the faint sound of murmuring._

_I freeze and Barnabas squeezes my hand before he pulls me behind a thick tree trunk. We remain there for a few long moments and then we hear the telltale sound of retreating footsteps._

_Barnabas looks at me and I can see that all the fire and lust from before is gone. His Adam's apple bobs as he licks his lips and then he is guiding me away from the tree._

_Barnabas' horse appears to our right and he lifts his hand towards him, motioning for the animal to stay put. The stallion gives a soft neigh and I smile a little._

_My dress gets caught in bushes as he treads carefully towards the other side and when we do arrive Barnabas inhales sharply. I look up at him, curiously, but his eyes are on the ground._

_I look down and go absolutely still. The grass is…distorted…as if someone has burned parts of it._

_I try to move forward, but Barnabas' arm becomes an obstacle._

"_Don't." he whispers with wide eyes and my eyes follow the burned grass, "Do you recognize it?" _

_My eyes fall on a carved rock in the middle and I shake my head._

"_No…"_

_His look is one of surprise and then his hand is on my face, brushing over my cheek._

"_Jane…" His eyes darken with alarm, "This is a witch's circle." He mutters and I turn sharply towards the ground._

_The grass…is…Wait, as I look at it better the burned ground looks like a circle…And the rock…there is something carved on its surface._

_Barnabas lets go of my hand, his eyes alert and looking for the culprit, but no one is here._

_I need no explanations. I already know who was here and what she was doing. My skin crawls at the thought, but Barnabas' enraged growl is loud and fearsome. My skin prickles at the sound because it reminds me of him when-…_

"_Wait!" I exclaim as he whirls around and storms towards his horse. He turns to me, eyes wide and expression worried._

"_Jane! Go back home!"_

_When I linger he growls, "Now!"_

_I nod as he mounts his horse, but I am too curious. When he is away, I lean towards the rock. Upon it, carved in crimson, is a single letter; J._

_I shudder and stumble back, but I can't help the fall. As my body collides with the ground I am lost into oblivion._

_I am waking up._

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

"Back off, people. Give her room to breathe…" I can hear Julia's voice as I stir.

My body feels numb, my neck is sore and my head is pounding. I can feel my blood thrumming on my temple and I come to the conclusion that I am alive, albeit a bit worse for wear.

"Has the bleeding stopped?"

Elizabeth's voice. I suddenly feel safe. I trust her. She's the only one I trust aside Barnabas-…My thought is rebuked when I remind myself that he brought me to this condition in the first place.

_Can you really blame him?_ My inner voice is too loud.

_He has said that without the bond complete you aren't safe. It seems that you aren't completely safe from him too._

I swallow hard, but the movement causes me to wince. My throat is sore. I can still faintly feel his teeth on my skin. That means that he hasn't had a chance to heal it.

In fact, I don't hear him. Alarmed, I slowly open my eyes.

"Yes, the bleeding has stopped. That's just old blood." A finger is on my robe and I look at Julia.

"Oh, she's awake." She whispers with wide eyes and I blink rapidly.

My vision is foggy no matter how hard I try to clear it, but I can see Elizabeth's face hovering to my left.

She smiles reassuringly and takes my hand.

"How are you?"

I open my mouth, but nothing comes out. Alarmed, I try again, but I only release a pained moan.

Elizabeth frowns and looks at Julia who licks her lips.

"It must be the shock…" she starts.

"Are you sure he didn't hurt her vocal cords?" Victoria's voice breaks through my skull like a drill and I close my eyes as she appears at the foot of the bed.

Elizabeth's hand tightens around mine, "Vicky, it'd be best if you left. Too much noise." She pauses and at Victoria's dubious look she adds very quietly, "He is not going to hurt you. It'd do him no good anyway." She mutters the last sentence and I open my eyes, focusing on Elizabeth. God, I am still terribly dizzy.

"Alright…Um…fine." The younger woman steps back and when I hear the sound of the door closing I sigh with relief.

"It'd help if you had some water." Julia is talking again, but I just want to go back to sleep.

"Then you can have a pill for your pain."

Elizabeth helps me up and I accept the water.

"Do you think she'll tell?" Julia is looking at Elizabeth.

"I am not sure."

"I don't trust her. Too mousy and nosey." Julia mutters.

"Julia, I don't think she fully realizes what is going on here. It'd be better if she stays here. That way we can monitor her. If she leaves who knows what she might say?" Elizabeth hands me a pill which I take with gratefulness. I swallow it with more water and then I look at my stained clothes.

I shudder because they bring back memories. Memories I have no wish to remember.

"You should call him." Julia speaks up again and Elizabeth releases my hand.

"I…don't think he's ready for that." She mutters.

"He needs to fix this. It might get infected." Julia points out and Elizabeth fixes her with a glare.

"So, we'll clean it with alcohol and disinfectant again if we must." Her voice is firm. It's clear that she doesn't want to disturb him. I wonder how he feels…From his character I realize that he must feel…terrible. My heart beats harder inside my ribcage at the thought.

"His way of healing might be more effective when it comes down to hiding those marks…We have a child in this house, remember?" Julia points at my neck and Elizabeth pauses.

"Not yet." She picks up a bottle of sanitizer and throws it towards Julia who catches it, "Give him time…Give her time."

I open my mouth to speak, to inform her that I want to see him very much, but once again my voice fails me. I clear my throat and then try again. Both women focus on me and I manage a weak phrase.

"I'm fine." I reply, trying not to show my mild fear before I tug on my clothes. Elizabeth quickly jumps into motion.

"Ah, clothes!" She pulls my closet open and eyes the various nightdresses Barnabas has stocked in there with wide eyes.

"What a collection…" she pulls out a pale burgundy one, not so unlike from the dress in my dream and places it on the bed, "After you wash." She smiles at me and closes the closet.

Julia is staring at my closet with intensity and a cocked eyebrow and I flush before I weakly start sitting up.

"Julia." Elizabeth is already heading for the door.

The redhead blinks out of her trance and clears her throat, "Right." She walks out of the room after she places the disinfectant on my bed side table.

Elizabeth glares at her and then sighs, "I'll be in my room if you need anything…You are alright, yes?" She frowns and I quickly nod my head. It's still painful for me to speak.

"You know…you might be connected, but he must know how you feel about things. So, when you see him let him know." She whispers quietly before she walks away, leaving me with my thoughts…which are in turmoil.

I start to wonder…Do I want to see him so soon? Am I not afraid of what he can do? Of what he almost did?

I shake my head as I take the nightdress and sanitizer with me. I am not afraid…I am more worried about his condition. Is he alright? How about the wound on his stomach? I nearly run to the door to call for Elizabeth again, but I stop myself. If he was in danger they would tell me, right? Of course they would…Right?

I rub my throat and hiss when the marks throb with pain. He has done a number on me. I realize that as I step into the bathroom and gaze at the mirror.

I look ashen. The two bright red teeth marks are inflamed and swollen and I sigh. I pick up the bottle of disinfectant and pour some on the bite marks, thinking that direct contact would be better. I cry out hoarsely and clutch at the sink with my fingers.

"Damn." I mutter as I throw the bottle away. I need to clean up properly. Deciding to ignore my thoughts and worries, I focus on bathing myself. I am in peace for the rest hour or so…

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

The room is dark as I step out of the bathroom. I frown. Groping my way towards the bed, I sit down and reach for the lamp on the nightstand. I flick the switch on and push my wet hair away before I turn around.

"Jesus Christ!" I cry out loudly and flail my hands about. The vase is knocked off my nightstand and smashes into pieces from my wild motions. Damn it! I didn't even touch it.

"Reflexive reaction." Barnabas mutters as he looks at my apologetically, "I'm sorry I scared you." He whispers and I place a hand on my breast.

"It's…alright. You must be used in my destroying your property." I mutter as I take him in. He in a pair of dark pajama bottoms and he has his robe on. His hair is also wet as if he has just taken a bath and I am suddenly breathless. He looks…fine. His skin is a pale, but a clear white color and his face is free of any blood. His lips are the usual deep pink color and he is currently biting on his lower lip.

He looks wonderful while I look…a mess.

"I was not referring to the vase…" he murmurs, "I am talking about the dreadful scare I gave you earlier." His eyes fall on my bandaged neck, "You must hate me."

I finger my sore neck and then shift upon the bed.

"That's not true…" I shake my head and his eyes widen a little, "I admit that I am…scared. That I was scared."

I am taking Elizabeth's advice. I am telling him how I feel. Nothing wrong with that, right?

"I didn't want to scare you."

"I know." I nod.

"I didn't want to kill you." He says firmly and I watch as his fingers curl around my bedcovers.

"I know…but you almost did." I look up at him and he seems disgusted.

"I wouldn't kill you. I just…" he trails off as he absentmindedly brushes his cool palm over his stomach, "I wanted to be near you." He finishes with a long sigh, "If you had just stopped moving I wouldn't have torn the skin-…"

"I was scared!"

"So was I! But I had no way to communicate that to you!" he snaps as our eyes lock. I almost swallow my tongue at his words.

"I was scared as well. You saw me biting Elizabeth. You saw that it did me no good. I was ashamed…And then Victoria was there and everything went downhill." He fixes me with a stare, "A werewolf's bite can be lethal to vampires, Jane."

"I know that." I say quietly and he nods.

"For the first time since I was reconnected with you I felt weak."

I decide to slide closer to him. He stiffens.

"Why?"

"Because the roles were reversed. I was the one who needed protection. Without your blood I'd be dead now." His hand flexes on his stomach and I swallow thickly. I reach out and push his hand gently away. He allows it and when I part his robe to expose his taut stomach he tenses up. There is nothing there. No wound, no scar. Just perfect pale skin. I look up.

"You know I'd never refuse to give you my blood. I was just scared." I whisper as I brush my fingertips over the smooth skin. His muscles clench under my touch and his breathy groan is heady in my ear.

"Jane." Fingers thread through my hair and I nestle my head on his shoulder. His skin smells of soap and his stomach quivers when I move my hand over the plane of skin.

Fingers slide over my neck and I shiver. I tilt my head up towards him and we lock eyes.

"It stings…Will you fix it?" I murmur and a small smile makes its appearance upon his lips.

With a gentle hand, he pushes me back on the mattress. The nightdress slides up my legs as I move and his eyes flicker briefly to the exposed skin. He brushes a hand up my calf, but moves up my body without delay. He comes to rest over me with the help of his elbow and his hand abandons my leg to pull away the bandage on my neck. Once the skin is revealed his eyes darken and his mouth curls into a line of displeasure. Eyes darting to my face, he leans closer until his cool breath is fanning over my exposed skin. He applies lips and tongue to the task and as he tends to the tender skin I can feel the pain evaporating. At first it is replaced by a faint sting and then the only thing I can feel is the tickling sensation of his tongue.

A chuckle escapes me and he pulls back to catch glimpse of the rare smile on my face.

"Lovely." He breathes and for a moment I fight with the urge to blush, but then I lean forward. My lips touch his and he recoils in surprise. He pulls back and with dark eyes moving over my face, he leans down again. His mouth engulfs mine in a deep kiss and his hand is back on my leg, tracing circles and imaginary designs.

My arms slide about his neck and with a pull he is on top of me, his solid weight forcing me hard onto the mattress and he groans into the kiss.

I release his lips and his eyes flutter open, gazing down at me with barely concealed emotion.

"You knew from the start that I was…a…" I trail off as I recall the dream and he swallows hard.

"Yes." His voice is husky.

"Did you know that it'd be the same with me? Here…Now?"

"No…not really. I could not tell."

I nod, "In the dream…The last one…"

He nods his head, his expression open and inviting, "Hmm?"

"What did the _J_ stand for?" I whisper and he frowns a little, "For me or Josette?"

He bites his lip before he replies, "For Josette. She acquired a broken leg from a fall. It was _not_ a fall." His eyes flicker towards the large window with anger. When they return onto my face the rage is gone.

"She didn't know about us yet." He murmurs and I take a deep breath.

"Did you kill the werewolf that hurt you?" I ask in a rush and slowly he shakes his head in the negative.

Inhaling sharply with worry and dread, I pull my arms tighter around him, pushing him closer and he hisses as I do so.

"I want to complete the bond." The words are out of my mouth before I can stop them and I feel him freeze on top of me.

"Jane?" he breathes my name out in a strained voice.

"Now." I look him in the eye, but before I can blink twice, he is off of me.

He flies back until his back hits the wall. He slides down until his feet are on the floor and he digs his fingers against the wall by his body.

Perturbed by his reaction, I sit up and stare at him. Our gazes lock and I am waiting with bated breath for his reply. His gaze has never looked so terrified and wanton as it does now. But as he swallows hard, I can already tell the answer he is going to give me.

It's going to be 'no'.

**End of chapter 19**

**Author's note: Thank you for reading! Please comment before you go. It'll make my day!**

**Until next time!**

**Xxx Lina :D**


	21. Chapter 20

**A/N: Welcome! Apologies for being late! I want to thank: AgnesBriot1969, 11Dr. Luv, Makrciana, Ashley, SpringBorn, ShiroKoneko82, TinkerbellxO, XantheXV, MissMisc3, MusicIslife2015, dionne dance and xxPaige23xx. Thank you all for your support.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Dark Shadows.**

* * *

**Chapter 20**

_**Love is merely a madness; and I tell you it deserves as well a dark house and a whip as madmen do; and the reason why they are not punished and cured is that the lunacy is so ordinary that the whippers are in love too.**_

_**~Rosalind, As You Like It**_

The clock is ticking noisily.

"No. I…I cannot."

The sputtered words are ringing in my ears as I stare at him. I swear he just went two shades paler. His fingers are nearly clawing at the wall behind him. His features are twisted and confused…Despaired.

_No._

The word echoes in my head again and again and I finally come to an unwanted realization. I feel…strange. The word is stinging and I blink twice, three times, until I can finally tell what this emotion eating at me is. It's hurt. Plain, unadulterated hurt.

"Why?" The word tumbles out of my lips reflexively and I immediately regret it when his features spasm in pain.

"Jane…I cannot." His murmur is quiet, weak and his reluctance is palpable.

"You…" I start, but I falter. Do I really want to show how pathetic I am? Do I really need to enunciate further how much his rejection actually hurts me?

_Now you know how he feels all the time…_

_Shut up._

_Irony, isn't it?_

"It's not the time." He saves me from further embarrassment when he speaks before me.

I look up at him and lick my suddenly parched lips.

"You were eager in the past." I am not sure why my words are so accusing and bitter. How many times have I denied him further access to my body? Countless times.

"I still am." His eyes do a quick perusal of my body and I shiver despite myself, "But now…is not the time." He clasps at his side, near his stomach with one pale hand and I can see that he averts his eyes.

"What do you mean?" I stand up and slowly, like a frightened animal, I approach him. His back straightens and he pushes himself hard against the wall of my bedroom. I can see his body shaking from the effort of keeping his distance and for a crazy moment I think about using my scent to my benefit.

_Manipulator now? _My conscience is mocking me and I inwardly cringe. She is right of course.

"Jane…" He raises a hand and slowly shakes his head, "I've been weak…I cannot…do that without-…" he cuts himself short and I narrow my eyes.

"You're afraid of hurting me." I whisper and he closes his eyes in defeat.

"Yes…No! I wouldn't hurt you…Not on purpose." He tries to relax and he takes the first step by dropping his hands to his sides.

"Then what is it? You've told me…or at least hinted that it would help me with my powers. We need my powers right now. With a werewolf on the loose-…"

"Exactly!" he cuts me off sharply and I shut my mouth quickly, "The bond will chain us together. Forever. There will be no turning back and no matter how piteously dependent I am on that hope, I know that it will bring more trouble to you." His voice is hoarse and extremely low and I dare to step closer. He doesn't move or try to stop me. He is simply watching me carefully.

"Will you explain it to me?" My voice is quiet and encouraging…At least I hope it is.

His eyes stray to my lips for a moment and then guiltily return to my eyes, "The bond will bind you with me and I will protect you because I will strive to do so with everything that I have. I've told you before. But it will also make you more vulnerable. If that werewolf is after me then you are in imminent danger as well. If he finds out that you are my mate," I gasp a little at that and he swallows hard, "then he will make sure to destroy you too."

"He wouldn't be able to if I had full control of my powers." I step even closer to his stiff form. Barnabas eyes me with hesitation and when I place my hands on his stomach, his gaze flickers towards them. His muscles contract against my palms. His lips part to release a quick breath and I smile a little.

"Your powers _are_ strong." He murmurs as I lean closer and his cool breath is enough to make me shudder. I let my hands rest lightly on his waist as I shuffle forward.

"Not yet."

"They are…sufficient." His voice is hoarse and I shake my head in response.

"Now you're lying." I mutter and I watch his Adam's apple bob as I let my mouth brush his smooth, pale jaw.

"I…am not." His voice is extremely high pitched and when I realize that this is working in my favor I decide to take things further by pushing my lips against his. For a moment he freezes and his hands move to clutch at my hips with bruising force and when I wrap my arms around his neck and sink a hair in his short dark hair he groans and dives into the kiss with frantic desperation. His arms move to tightly curl around my waist and I can feel his cold fingers on my back. His lips part mine and his tongue is quick to battle with mine for dominance as I raise myself up to my tiptoes.

One hand abandons my back to sink in my hair and I lean into the touch, releasing a small whimper into his mouth. The sound seems to have the opposite effect and he suddenly stops. His hands are quick to push me away and I am shocked when I find myself sprawled upon the bed by the force of his push.

His eyes are wide and wild as he breathes out the next few words, "You witch. I told you no." His lips are swollen from my kiss and I know that if he were human he would have flushed.

"Barnabas…is that an insult?" I murmur with plain amusement even though my heart is hammering inside my ribcage. Have I gone too far?

He makes a comical sound in the back of his throat, but I suddenly realize that his patience is thinning when he makes a beeline for the door without looking back.

My eyes go wide and before I can speak and offer my apology he is gone and I am left alone.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

I am sitting stiffly in my seat as breakfast is served. Carolyn has seated herself, surprisingly enough, next to me and I can see that she has her eyes trained across from us. I take a sip from my cup of warm coffee and follow her gaze. I try not to frown when I realize that her stare is directed towards Victoria. I blink, trying to understand why and then realization dawns. The woman looks like she is sitting upon a blazing fire. Her eyes are guarded as she suddenly looks up and locks eyes with Carolyn. I can see her freeze and I cautiously look at the young girl beside me. Carolyn's face is twisted into an amused smirk and I wonder if her…special senses can tell something that mine cannot. When she snorts I focus on Victoria again. She looks…pale.

Does she know about Carolyn too? Is that the reason behind her cautiousness and awkwardness?

Deciding it is better not to worry about this one as well at the moment, I look at Elizabeth who is busy looking at a cooking book. I cock an eyebrow in surprise and clear my throat. The sound causes both Barnabas and Victoria to look at me. Victoria is startled while Barnabas looks lost.

"Um, what's that for?" I speak clearly and loudly because I need him to know that I am not angry about his decision. Not really. I am simply embarrassed. No, that's an understatement; I am mortified by my bold actions. You don't push a vampire to sleep with you when he has just recovered from a fit of blood thirst.

"Mom has decided to throw a party." Carolyn's tone is light and I wonder why there is always mockery and weariness in it.

_Teenager, remember?_

Oh right.

"A party?"

"Not a party." Elizabeth sighs, "Carolyn is exaggerating. A small gathering."

I smile, "That sounds nice."

"What for?" Barnabas speaks up for the first time since he entered the room and my gaze immediately flickers towards him. Our gazes lock for a moment and I smile a little. He seems surprised, but his gaze immediately softens with a warm glimmer.

"It's mom's birthday. She's turning-…"

"Carolyn!" Elizabeth cuts her off with a faint flush on her cheeks.

"Oh come on, Liz." Julia looks at her from over the rim of her sunglasses. The redness of her eyes is proof of her grogginess.

"We all know how old you are." Julia snickers.

Elizabeth sniffs, "I know that. Carolyn was just about to exaggerate is all." She shoots a warning look at her daughter before she turns to Julia.

"I have no problem divulging my age. Forty five. What about you, Julia?" she asks sweetly and the doctor pushes her glasses back up her nose.

"A lady never divulges her age in front of a man." Her reply causes me to snort and all eyes are upon me.

"See? I am not the only who finds this ridiculous." Carolyn grabs a muffin and walks away from the table, her footsteps bouncy.

"I'm sorry." I shake my head, "I am simply amused. There are worse things one can divulge besides age."

Julia stares at me before she turns back to her glass of strong coffee. She waits a few seconds before she rolls her eyes and walks away, dragging her feet lazily before she disappears.

"Well said." Elizabeth nods and looks at the recipe book through her glasses again.

"Indeed." Barnabas' voice causes me to look at him and for a moment I cannot tell what he's thinking.

"You surely are familiar to those worse things, I suppose." Victoria's voice startles both Barnabas and me.

Her eyes are wide as she looks between me and Barnabas.

"I've seen that you are." She clarifies shakily.

Barnabas stiffens and places his finger against his mouth as he averts his eyes.

I blink at the way she uses those words.

"It's true." I nod my head and I can see that Barnabas is moving forward, ready to place a hand on my arm. Victoria follows the movement with her wide baby blue eyes and I pull away from the touch.

"How can you do it? Aren't you people afraid?" she whispers and Elizabeth puts away the book, her expression serious.

"People only fear things that they don't understand." She starts quietly, but Victoria's gaze doesn't waver from me. There is something hiding behind that gaze; something more serious than simple fear.

"I suppose it does take a little bit of insanity." I say and Barnabas' eyes widen.

"Insanity? What do you know about insanity?" Victoria chokes out incredulously and I shift in my seat.

Barnabas' hand slips towards her, but she doesn't let him touch her. In one abrupt move, she is off her chair. She is out of the room before I can reply and inform her that I know a lot of things about insanity. My existence has always flirted with it; especially in the last few months. I take a deep breath instead and watch with surprise as Barnabas gets out of his seat as well and trails after her in his usual regal manner.

I try not to worry about that, trying to assure myself that he simply needs to comfort her and explain things to her, but it is not working. All I am thinking about is why does he need to trail after her like a lost puppy and why on earth am I so bothered by it?

I put my cup down and watch on until his form is lost behind the wall. I can already feel my skin flushing with color that has nothing to do with shame or embarrassment. My heart is pounding inside my chest and I grit my teeth against the overwhelming feeling of unexplained anger that is trying to possess me. A thin layer of sweat is coating my skin and I frown, but I cannot take my eyes away from the door Barnabas and Victoria just walked through. My eyes are widened to the extreme and I try to lessen the pressure by trying to keep them in their natural size, but I cannot.

Frantic with the need to calm down, I try to distract myself by averting my gaze. The next thing I know, slivers of glass are flying towards me and Elizabeth's loud yell breaks through my wild haze. Pain erupts on the skin of my arms, face and neck and I close my eyes in a delayed attempt to block off any pieces of glass.

The deafening sound of the glass water pitcher breaking is like a distant soundtrack and when a hand touches me I shoot up from my chair.

"Jane? Are you alright?" Elizabeth's face is blurry as I open my eyes and I can see that my clothes are covered in blood.

Did I…Did I just do that? Did I break the pitcher? With what? My eyes or my emotions?

"I…I'm fine. I am so sorry." I whisper in shock, but she just looks at me with worry.

"You have cuts on you. Let's take care of them." She shakes her head and gently takes my bloodied arm.

"I am so sorry." I stutter the words out, grateful that David wasn't here to see it and also get hurt in the process.

"Forget the pitcher." She looks around and gently tugs me along, "What happened?" she whispers and I blink, worried that my vision is still too foggy.

"I think…I just channeled magic through my eyes." I murmur and she gasps, her eyes wide.

"Oh my…Have you…done that before?" she ventures slowly as we make our way towards the chairs.

"No…Maybe. I am not sure." I shake my head, blinking rapidly in order to clear my eyes.

"What caused it?"

I pause and swallow hard against the reflexive answer that is about to spill from my mouth.

_Jealousy…and anger._

"I don't know." I lie and Elizabeth smiles. Not the reaction I had hoped for.

"You're getting used to it."

_I am not._

"Maybe."

"Next time focus on something less dangerous than glass." She suggests and I turn remorseful eyes towards her.

"I'm sorry."

She laughs a little, "No worries. I hated that pitcher anyway." She tells me as she leads me to her own bathroom.

I smile, but it is forced like every move I take alongside her. I want to go and lock myself into my room. Right now.

_Oh my God._ I think as she places me on the closed toilet seat and gets out some cotton and antiseptic.

I am turning into a jealous witch. Like _her_.

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

_When I find myself in Barnabas' chamber I tense up. The room is dark, the atmosphere thick and heady with a musky scent. I recognize the smell immediately. It's him. He smells exactly the same in my reality as well._

_I shuffle my feet when I feel the silence overpowering the air around me and look up._

_I pause. The oval painting on the wall brings a flutter deep inside my belly. _

"_You're looking at it?" His voice filters in my ears and I turn to him. His fancy clothes are off and he approaches me clad only in his shirt and breeches. The first few buttons are undone and the lacy sleeves are falling over his knuckles, brushing over his skin as he walks._

"_Yes." I clear my voice._

"_I thought you were sleeping." He frowns and I try not to focus on the way he's looking at me too much. That'd be dangerous._

"_I…was." _

_Was I? I am not sure._

"_Hmm. So, do you like it?" He comes to stand next to me and his sleeve is brushing my hand._

_Do I?_

"_That's not me." I shake my head and he laughs._

"_It is you."_

"_She's…prettier." I tilt my head to the side as I look at the painting. Where did he get this? Can I ask him? Or do I already know?_

_His breath is warm against my shoulder and I shiver, turning my head to look at him._

"_Now you're simply speaking nonsense." He breathes before he closes the distance between us, his hands sliding about my waist to settle on my lower back. I can feel his touch through the thin layer of clothing that I am wearing and I frown into the kiss, relaxing when his lips and tongue try to deepen the connection. My back finds the wall and I groan into the kiss, shuddering when his hands roam my sides until they come to rest on the wall on either side of my head. The feeling is familiar by now; too familiar and incredibly welcome._

_I break the kiss to gasp for air and his mouth finds my jaw, his tongue flicking out to lave at my skin. My chest is heaving and I try to gather my senses long enough to formulate words._

"_Why am I here?" I whisper and he pauses. He pulls away to regard me with a small frown, the crease between his eyebrows more attractive than it should have been._

"_Because I would like to spend time with you…" He pulls back a little, doubt clouding his features, causing his eyes to burn with disappointment, "You…don't want to be here? I assure you, my parents are not here."_

_I flush at that and clear my throat a little, the movement causing my lips to tingle even further._

"_Of course I do." I smile and then I notice the dark circles under his eyes. For the first time he looks tired._

_My thumbs immediately start tracing the dark curves as I cup his cheeks. His eyes drop a little and a lopsided smile causes his mouth to curl up at one corner._

"_You've not been sleeping?" I murmur and I am shocked to realize that the need to find the cause of his fatigue is overwhelming. _

_He slowly shakes his head, his hand touching my hip, "I'm fine."_

"_You're not."_

_He swallows hard, "I do not want to cause you any worry. I shall simply say that breaking the heart of a young woman is not so satisfying. Especially when you have a family that wants to devour you for that decision." He mutters and I immediately understand._

_Josette._

"_Oh." My fingers pause on his skin and he frowns._

"_I thought it'd be easier. Especially when they know that you are everything to me."_

_They do? My eyes go wide. Who else knows?_

_His arms curl about my waist and I am suddenly pulled upwards. My legs coil around his hips and he smiles._

"_Never mind them." He murmurs as he turns and maneuvers us towards the large bed, "It's just you and me now, my little witch. I wonder if you can you do something about that window? Or the lights?" He smiles indulgently as he places me on the mattress and pulls slightly back._

_Without speaking I turn to look at the window. I flick my hand, focusing on the glass as it slams shut with a loud thud. Barnabas' laughter echoes._

"_You've been practicing while I was away, hmm?"_

_I blink and simply offer a smile which he leans down to cover with a kiss. My eyes focus on the door visible from over his shoulder and I frown when I notice that it is open. I break away from his lips to tell him so._

_He groans as he leaves me on the bed and heads to shut the door, but something causes him to freeze._

"_What are you doing here? I gave specific instructions for this evening, didn't I?" His tone is darker and I sit up. Who is he talking to?_

"_You did, Master. But I had other plans." _

_His loud exclamation of pain is the only sound in the room when he is suddenly thrust towards the wall across the door._

_I gasp and scramble to my feet just as the lean frame of Angelique obscures the door._

_I freeze and can only watch with wide eyes as Barnabas' body slides down the wall, his features screwed up in pain._

"_You." She whispers as she points a long finger towards me, "It's you?" Her eyes flicker towards her Master._

"_All this for her? The great Collins family in an uproar for her? What will poor Josette say?" Her eyes are glimmering madly and Barnabas is suddenly on his feet, his expression fierce._

"_Leave my manor at once."_

_Her head moves slowly, "I don't think so, my love." she murmurs almost sadly before she steps aside._

_The next thing happens so fast that I can barely grasp on it. A flare of movement and then something heavy and large is storming towards me. All I can see before I am pushed to my back upon the carpet is the flash of sharp teeth and nails. The body holding me down is strong as if made of iron and hairy and I scream as my wrists are slammed to the ground. Long nails are digging into the soft skin of my wrists and I can feel the bare body above me, pushing me down._

_Bare body? Hair? Werewolf._

_The other witch's voice seems distant, but I can hear it nonetheless, "Do you know what that is?"_

"_Get away from me, devil." Barnabas' voice sounds pained and I turn my head towards him, trying to ignore the creature that is holding me down, trying to ignore the darkness of his gaze because it is definitely a he._

"_That, my love, is a werewolf. Do you know how werewolves mate?" She purrs and I cry out when I can feel the creature's hips pressing roughly against my own._

_A lone finger trails down my neck and I quiver, trying in vain to focus and use whatever power I have, but the fear is overpowering._

"_What do you want? I'll give you anything. Just…take him away from her." Barnabas voice is strong and I briefly wonder if he knows that werewolves and vampires do exist. Why doesn't he sound more surprised?_

"_You know what I want." Angelique's voice is sharp and demanding, but I am too focused on the werewolf's shadowed face to really pay attention. Why is he staring at me like that? _

_Oh my God._

"_Never." Barnabas' reply comes a little too fast and I know that this is not going to end well._

"_Pity. You should have thought of that answer better. Gregory." She smirks and the creature above me growls in response, his teeth bared into a sneer as he leans further down towards me._

"_No!"_

_There is a loud thud and a groan of pain and the next thing I know is that I am being nuzzled by the werewolf. His scent is revolting, but that is not what makes me shake. It's the rigid hardness that I can feel pressing against my thigh. Squeezing my eyes shut I start to writhe underneath him, trying to shake him off, but he is not moving. He is too strong and I am too thin._

_I wish I could wake up, but if I do wake up I know that I'll never know what happened here._

_Twisting my body again, I raise my knee and direct it against the werewolf's groin. He howls in pain and his hold on me loosens long enough for me to twist my arms free._

"_Impressive." Angelique sounds out of breath and it is only then that I see her position on top of Barnabas. She has her fingers wrapped around the necklace he always wears. My eyes widen and I open my mouth to warn him, to tell him not to let her take it, but I am grabbed by the hips once more. Barnabas starts struggling harder at the sight of my position and I turn my attention back to the creature trying to trap me underneath him again. I roll away and I realize it is a wrong move when I feel him heavy against my back. My arms buckle from the weight and I fall flat on my front with a groan._

_Out of the corner of my eye I see Barnabas' kicking the witch away with a loud snarl and his expression heavily reminds me of the vampire he will soon become._

_Gritting my teeth against the pain of the body weighing me down, I use all my force, closing my eyes as I rise up on my hands and knees. Gregory seems surprised by the force and when I roll back on my back his feral eyes widen. I close my eyes and flex the fingers of my right hand before I thrust my arm outwards. His muscled chest is hard under my palm, but the connection doesn't last long. With a soft push of my fingers my magic surges through my limb and pushes him off. He lands against the opposite wall with a loud crack and I am able to breathe again._

_My victory doesn't last long because I feel myself slipping away. The last thing I see before I wake up is the furious face of Angelique and the proud expression on Barnabas' face._

oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoO

I wake up exactly where I fell asleep; Elizabeth's study. I rise up from the desk and look around, trying to find my bearings. The dream was…disturbing, but now I can understand the witch's fascination with werewolves. They are old, trusty friends of hers.

Shuddering at the memory, I look at the papers in front of me, knowing that Barnabas won't come looking for me this time. Things have been…odd between us and I know it's partly my fault.

Sighing, I focus on the papers Elizabeth has asked me to check and tidy. I have two more files to go through and I decide to start on the one at the bottom just to change direction.

Opening the file, I eye the receipts and numbers with a distressed expression. My brain cannot handle any more work, but I start flipping through them in an attempt to prepare myself for tomorrow. I am glad I can do something practical. It takes my mind off things and I greatly appreciate the quietness of this part of Collinwood.

My eye catches something at the bottom of the file and I pause. It's a CV…or sort of. It has a name, qualifications and yet no address.

_Maggie Evans._

I frown. Who is she? As I skim the paper I realize that it is not actually a CV. It is a letter for a governess position. I pause. My eyes move to the picture that is attached with the letter and I suddenly freeze. Victoria's serene face greets me and my eyes go wide.

"What in hell?" I whisper as I check the name and the picture again and again.

"Maggie Evans? I thought her name was Victoria." The door to the study suddenly bursts open and I jump.

Barnabas walks in, remorseful expression in place and hands up in a resigned manner.

"Alright. I admit defeat. I am sorry. I am so terribly sorry for…" he trails off when he notices my expression.

"Jane?" he murmurs as he eyes the papers around me, "Is it the dream? I assure you everything went well that day…Well, aside from the fact that the devil took my precious necklace-…"

"What is Victoria's last name?" I cut him off and he frowns, but then suddenly his eyes go to my cuts.

"Heavens! What happened?" In a flash he is next to me and I stand up as he touches me, "Who hurt you?" His eyes are dark, but I take his hand in mine. He seems surprised, but a small smile lightens up his face.

"You're not cross with me? I shall make it better, I swear it." He murmurs breathily as his eyes drop to my lips, "We shall do whatever you want. Anything." He leans closer and I allow him to kiss me and stroke my nicked cheek, but then I remember that there is something more important than our mating problems.

I pull back and he stares at me bewildered.

"What is it?" His voice is husky and I take a deep breath.

"What is Victoria's last name?" I ask again and he frowns, the crease deep upon his brow.

"Victoria's last name? I believe it is Winters…Why are you asking such a question?" he laughs a little and I slowly raise the letter and the picture.

"Because of this." I eye the paper and then lock eyes with him, "I seriously believe that Ms. Winters is lying. She is not who she says she is."

Barnabas' face falls and his hand is quick to grab at the letter.

"I…" he trails off with wide eyes and then his mouth curves into a severe line. He curls his fingers around the letter and slowly raises his eyes to me.

"Trickery." He mutters with disgust and I swallow hard.

"Perhaps there is an explanation-…Barnabas!" I call out his name when he decides that it is prudent to storm out of the study without another word. I blink rapidly and since I know his temper when tricked, I sprint after him before I can think about it twice.

**End of chapter 20**

**Author's note: Thank you for reading. **

**About the last part; it always amazed me that in the movie Victoria was able to keep up her fake identity…I mean, didn't people find out that she was lying? What name did she give when she first applied for the job? Willie said that they had been expecting her so they must have known her name at least…Oh well, I used that in order to create a little twist.**

**So, comments? I hope this made up for the long wait.**

**Until next time!**

**Xxx Lina :D**


End file.
